Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing. It belongs to Sunrise and the person who made it. I don't own the songs (True Reflection, Please Don't Surrender, Just About Enough, and You're Unbelievable) either.
Caught In An Endless Waltz
Measure 3 – Just About Enough
Part One – You're Unbelievable
Heero arrived at the scene of Relena's car crash as quickly as he could, hoping to find his beloved there. But she wasn't. Search parties had already accidentally destroyed what clues or evidence they would've had, and the bodies of Milliardo and Noin had whiscked off to the Peacecraft residential palace. It was a disaster. No matter; he was going to find Relena. She was alive; she had to be. He couldn't live without her, and he wasn't in the mood for dying. Heero had a mission to accomplish.
He searched the bridge; finding only skid marks that led to a broken rail and crumbling cement falling into the deep, secretive water underneath. Damn. He had always protected her before; even from himself. But this time it seemed like that the only thing that he could do was watch this cruel play unfold before his very eyes. An effort was being made to pull the limousine that Relena had been using up onto land; however, it would take some time. And then it would be too late.
"DAMN!"
Hearing his sudden outburst, a reporter came up to him casually and moved to stand next to Heero. Holding his microphone up to him, he asked brightly, "Excuse me sir, could I ask you some quick questions?" Heero slowly turned his face to face the man, his unruly hair flying in front of his handsome face, glaring. He had hated the paparazzi ever since they had dared to interfere with his life; claiming that Relena and Quatre were destined for each other. They had also said that she was denying Quatre her love because she loved Heero; and that Heero had broken her heart so many times that he didn't deserve her at all. Not even what little friendship they had begun over the long years of war. The paparazzi had no right to interfere with Relena, Quatre, or his life. None at all. So he gave the already stunned reporter his famous death glare. Reaching for his gun, in the left upper pocket of his jacket, he smirked. The reporter's mouth dropped. Followed closely by the dazed cameraman, the reporter ran off as fast as he could.
Replacing his gun in his pocket, Heero continued his strenuous search for any clues or even better, the object of his affection, Relena. He examined the skid marks, the broken rail, and the rippling water below him. None told him anything about where she was. It seemed so hopeless. She was alive; he could feel the tingling in his veins that told him that she was somewhere, breathing, and possibly happy without him. But if she was alive, Heero had to know where she was. Otherwise he couldn't do anything in peace; eat, watch television, walk, much less sleep. Heero continued his fruitless search for his beloved angel, trying to avoid the fact that he was completely powerless. He couldn't help Relena. If he had completed so many more missions in the past; why couldn't he finish this one mission, the one that mattered most to him?
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Relena's clothes blew this way and that, tickling her delicate skin. A gentle breeze played with her soft, gold hair, every once in a while caressing her beautiful face. The very scent of nature occupied the wonderfully serene forest. She breathed in the aroma of life in, and enjoyed the calm aura that surrounded the wood. It was perfect, this place. Everything was at peace and entirely content. Birds sang happily while leaves rustled, a natural orchestra. Everything was at peace with each other and at nature. Even the trees grew out their branches and reached for each other. But there was one regret, one thing missing from this perfect world. Heero. Relena imagined his chocolate colored, tousled hair, his deep, boundless eyes. His flawlessly sculpted face, his handsome features, and his rich voice. Every single part of her body tingled unmercifully, endlessly, at the very thought of him. It was even worse when he was around, near her, but denying her love. Running away. Relena wondered if she was the only person who could send the perfect soldier running. Even after knowing him all these years, after loving him for so long, she still had unanswered questions. It eluded her why he had threatened to kill her so many timed but had eventually protected her from danger. He was mysterious; like a shadow, always changing, never staying the same.
Instincts. That was all she had, and that was what guided her. It seemed like she was going in large, intricate circles, with daunting twists and turns. As if the entire forest wanted her to stay; like it was trapping her. Shifting, it broke apart into two different sections. One, a path to a bright, shining light. It glowed with a fierce intensity, like the look on a mother's face when her child has been born into the world. Various tints, hues of white and yellow swirled and joined, busily, full of energy. The other, a miniature of the original forest, peaceful and serene. Birds chirped every now and then, but as for that, there was no movement.
A sudden blast of wind brought to her attention voices. Of children and adults alike, all yelling for the attention of one person. Why didn't that person go? If so many people were searching, why didn't they come out? Relena also heard sounds of crying babies, and the rustling sound of movement. But one voice stood out, a low monotone voice. It had hits of genuine concern in it. Of a desperate soldier calling out for his loved one. Was it Heero? Could it be Heero?
She ran quickly toward the sound of his voice. It lured her to the path with the glowing light at the end. Faster and faster she ran toward him.
"I'm coming Heero! Wait for me!"
Relena had reached the source of the light. A door. Made of pure white, unblemished ivory that felt warm against her chilled hand. A daunting voice suddenly entered her thoughts.
The voice spoke to her, "Don't you want to quit your life? Well, here's your chance. What you see behind you are the famed Elysian fields of Elysium*, or Paradise as you may call it. It is a blissful place, and is the abode of the blessed. Wouldn't you like to go there? Spend the rest of eternity in Paradise, in a blissful state of peace, Relena!"
She had a sudden, uncontrollable urge to walk into that peaceful forest, into the perfect field beyond. Her mind fought that now growing urge; but it wasn't enough. Her legs began to walk on their own to Elysium. Suddenly, Relena heard the old man's voice in her mind. Please don't surrender, he begged desperately, his very voice tearing at that impulse to surrender her life. Her mind froze; confused. Please don't surrender, he repeated, his voice fading. Please do – he was cut off by yet another familiar voice in her mind. Relena! Where are you!?! Come back! Heero! He was pleading with her, his voice blocked all other thoughts from her perplexed mind. How can I go on without you? Come back, damn it! Please! WHERE ARE YOU? His voice cut at all other thoughts, and she had no reason, no desire whatsoever to die. He beseeched her again, Relena! Where are you? Relena! Come back!
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Heero dropped to his knees, begging all the gods he could think of for help. For pity. If only she returned to him. If only he knew that she was alive and well, he could die content that he had accomplished his vital mission. Groveling, he pleaded with her, where ever she was, to come back. Relena! Where are you!?! Come back!, his mind-voice begged.
Helplessly, he took out his pocket knife. It gleamed in the sunlight, reflecting all movements stealthily. Holding its sharp point up to his wrist with a shaking hand, he slit his muscled arm with one swift movement. Heero didn't even flinch, nor did his eyes betray any feelings or signs of pain. However, inside, he was screaming in pain. But his face remained stoic, expressionless, like always.
Always the perfect soldier, he heard Duo tease. Always. Ignoring mind-Duo's comment, he continued in his efforts to rid himself of his life. He tightened his grip on the knife, and slashed at his wrist, then his other arm, as if in a demonstration to Relena – where ever she was. How can I go on without you? Come back, damn it! Please! WHERE ARE YOU?, his mind-voice pleaded with her to come back to him.
Blood was flowing freely from his wrist, and spurting from his arms. A dark, growing puddle of blood surrounded Heero, as he continued with his attempt at suicide. He needed it to hurt to die. Heero need to feel how it felt to be tortured, to die a painful death like many others that he had unmercifully killed in the past. His heart was torn, at the thought of losing Relena. He had failed his mission. There was no reason for him to continue living anymore.
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At the sound of Heero's voice, Relena immediately ran back to the ivory door. As she examined the designs on the front, her hand reached to push it open. At that moment, the daunting voice from before yelled "Stop! Go back!" Her feet disobeyed her mind, and made her turn around, to face the beautiful forest once again. Just as she was about to enter in the gate to Elysium, she heard a familiar mind-voice scream in pain. Heero? He was in an indescribable amount of pain. Thoughts tore at him emotionally, and he seemed to have hurt himself physically. Relena could begin to know the pain he felt in the way his voice screamed openly.
All reason left her. Her heart pounding, she sprinted to the white door and opened it hurriedly. The voice yelled in defeat, leaving her mind, as a blinding white light enveloped her in its embrace. It seemed as if a thousand swords were sent into the air at the same time, reflecting all the wonderful glory of the sun.
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His soul still beseeched her, and he couldn't deny it that much. Thus, he restrained himself to only slashes on his left and right calves. Relena! Where are you? Relena! Come back! , it pleaded. It was no use. If she was to die, then he was too. Heero stood up, his arms falling to his sides, as he began to walk away. Away to the bridge, to end his god-forsaken life forever. Suddenly, he heard Relena's voice yell, "Heero!" Could it be? Relena!?! As if on cue, Relena's limp body appeared at his feet. He had to cover his mouth with his hand so to restrain himself from screaming out her name joyfully. Blood dripping onto the green, fresh grass under his tall figure, he reached for her lithe form. His rough, callused had moved to the top middle portion of her chest, searching for a tell tale trace of life – a heart beat. Thump, thump. Heero was relieved to find a steady heart beat, and let out a small sigh of relief.
Relena's eyelids fluttered open, and it seemed to her that everything was covered by a mist. Dazed, she rubbed her eyes in an effort to see better. Her eyes came into focus, and who was to kneel before her but her hero and love, Heero Yuy. She blinked, just to make sure that she wasn't dreaming, but he was still there. Suddenly, she noticed that he was badly hurt. He was covered with large slashes, and held a bloody pocket knife in his left hand.
She was so glad to be with him, now she felt a sense of protection with him so near to her. That voice had terrified her to her utter limits – it had asked her to die. Asked. Tempted. And came so close to achieving its goal, whether it was her death or her didn't matter. Relena was staying with Heero now, she would make sure he wouldn't, couldn't leave.
Unbeknownst to her, Heero was vowing the same thing. That he wouldn't ever leave her again. He was thanking all the gods that she was back, and silently reassuring his heart that he wouldn't have to leave her again. All the while, his soul yelped and jumped for joy.
"Heero, can you promise me something?"
"Hn."
"Promise that you won't ever leave me again."
Heero looked at her, genuinely shocked. He hadn't been expecting that, but the somewhat shocked but confused quickly dissipated, replaced by a small smile. Yes, a small smile.
"Relena, you're unbelievable. I'll never leave you. Never."
Relena smiled brilliantly, and sat on the fresh emerald grass. She was so delighted that it shone and seemed to radiate outward from her perfect body.
Smiling uncontrollably, Relena observed Heero's well toned body. It was then that she finally took notice of Heero's severe injuries.
"Are you alright? Heero?"
"Hn."
She was disappointed at the lack of emotion in his voice, but when she looked into his eyes she saw the unexpected – feelings. Worry, desperation, despair, and other countless emotions swam around in his Prussian blue orbs. Realizing that she was staring at him; she quickly averted her gaze. But it was too late, that almost impenetrable wall was set up again in his eyes. A small smile crept onto her face. A cold drop of liquid hit her leg. Blood. Relena lifted her right hand to grab Heero so she could examine his injures. Just because he said he was fine didn't mean that he really was. He had deep cuts on his calves, arms, and had slit wrists. The blood had collected in a foul smelling pool of the life-giving liquid.
"You have to go to the doctor right now."
"No."
"Yes! You're seriously hurt! You could – you could die!" She forced out the last three words as if she was greatly hurt in saying them, and with each letter she stuttered.
"I'll be fine."
"I demand that you go right now!"
"No."
Relena sighed. She knew he was in pain; he just wouldn't admit it. And if this continued...who knows what might happen. Why was he doing this to her? She hated seeing him and pain, and especially when she was in a position where she could help him. Why was he so stubborn? And if he was to die...she flinched at the mere thought of losing him to death.
Heero watched her stare off into the sky; sighing. He had to find out where she had been, why she had appeared out of no where at his feet, and why she looked so deathly pale. And what had happened. When he noticed that she had flinched slightly, a feeling that he couldn't control took over him. It was warm, and blossomed in his heart, and it sent a urge to protect her from whatever she was feeling. From the assassins who wanted to kill his beautiful angel, the heartless, power-hungry politicians that she faced daily. From the world. From him. So as this instinct took over his emotionally starved body, he slowly, cautiously lifted his bloody arms and wrapped them around her slender waist. They gradually snaked their way around her slim figure, and overlapped each other at the base of her chest. He heard her breathe sharply, and felt it under his blood-stained arms. Then she relaxed, leaning back onto his muscular frame, her head positioned in the crook of his neck. Heero didn't react to her movements physically. But inside, his heart was racing, pounding ferociously. His blood splattered onto her silky dress, a sharp contrast to the pale color of her dress. Heero saw this and began to remove his bloody arms from her body, when Relena stopped him, grabbing his arm. Slowly, and carefully, she stood up, pulling him up with her. Relena began to take long strides, with Heero following close behind.
She knew that he would follow. As she stepped into the view of the searching public, all she saw were flashes of light. Reporters yelled their questions; demanding to be heard. Heero silenced them with his determined glare, and his grotesquely injured body. They knew that he would go as far as death and back for their Vice Foreign Minister, and they had no intent of making him go that far. Or so to say, none of them had a death wish as of now, unlike the suicidal pilot 01, ushering his beloved through the horde of people massed at the scene of the fateful accident.
"Why are they here? Why isn't Milliardo here to tell them to shut up? And where's Noin?"
Heero stopped. How could he tell her? There seemed no way to break it to her easily. So, thinking that it would help, Heero put on his emotionless mask that he had worn when he was the perfect soldier on. Then he took a deep breath, disguising it behind a distinguished attempt to clear his throat. Butterflies flew around aimlessly in his stomach, and his heart seemed split between the need to tell her and the need to protect her from anything.
"Well? Heero?"
"They have passed on."
At first, Relena face held a look of shock, but then it turned into surprise, then amusement. Finally, she burst into a bout of laughter. She was thrown into a fit of chuckles, she laughed so loudly that, the press, wide-eyed, stared at her. Immediately, she replaced that face with her usually smiling, yet stoic face that the media usually saw. However, one small giggle escaped from the confinement of her lush lips before she returned to the public's beloved Dove of Peace – Relena Peacecraft Darlian.
Heero was stunned. Was this the way she coped with deaths of her family, friends, and loved ones? Would she laugh at his death; his funeral? A look of utter shock flashed across his face briefly.
"Well. I never thought that I would see the day that Heero Yuy made a joke. Or rather the perfect soldier."
"That wasn't a joke."
A stifled chuckle escaped from those tender, pink lips. A genuine smile lit up her beautiful, ethereal face. With the sun shining upon her slender, lithe figure, she looked every bit the angel she was to Heero. Her glowing face, and peaceful yet playful smile completed the look. A tiny smile managed to get past Heero's well built emotional walls that had been strengthened over years of war and hard training. And killing.
"Come one Heero. Tell me. I'm dying to know."
When she spoke "dying" it felt wrong. All wrong. She had been on the edge of death, far away from all existence, somewhere unknown to him, and she still used that choice of words? It sent a frigid shiver down his spine.
"Relena..."
Heero grabbed her shoulder fiercely, forcing her to look at him. But he couldn't hold it anymore. The pain was too much. Maybe, just maybe, possibly...possibly Relena was right. Maybe he had to see a doctor. No! If he could survive being thrown through the air by the force of his exploding Gundam, if he could survive using his self-destruct option several times, it he could survive living without Relena, he could survive anything the world threw at him. Anything. Then Heero Yuy, the Perfect Soldier, fainted.
Relena held Heero by his shoulders, supporting his weight with her own. She hadn't been expecting this from him. He had changed – first, he had cracked a joke, and then he had fainted. If he had changed to become so much more human, could he learn to love me? These thoughts and others scurried around randomly, making themselves apparent to her mind. But at this time, she needed help
"Help! Someone!"
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Heero woke up to the sound of beeping, unfamiliar voices, and to his heart almost stopping, encouraging more anguished sighs and barked orders. Relena wasn't here with him. Instantly, he willed himself to open his eyes; it didn't matter if it hurt. He had promised Relena that he would never leave her, unwillingly or willingly. And he kept his promises.
"He's woken up. Page the Vice Foreign Minister at once." A strong-willed voice spoke, apparently the leader of this new cult against Relena.
However, when Heero finally managed to open his eyes, what he saw wasn't what he had expected. It had whitewashed walls, a plain bed which he was lying on now, surrounded by all sorts of machinery. He looked at his hands, there were no bruises, no marks that would have been tell tale signs of chains or handcuffs. A red, worn sign was hung up over the wood door. ER. He had to stop himself from laughing – he was so stupid! He was in a hospital, not the headquarters of a new rebel group.
His thoughts were interrupted by the lady's voice again. He looked up to see a tall, middle-aged brunette. Her brown hair was put up stylishly in a tight ponytail, and pinned to her head with a large black clasp. She wore a doctor's robe the color of snow, which reached barely past her legs. A dark amber color lit up her face, contrasting with the white garments she wore.
"Had a nice sleep, I trust?"
"Hn."
"The Vice Foreign Minister should be here anytime now; we paged her earlier."
Heero nodded, signaling for her to continue filling him in all that he had missed while he was asleep. Sitting up, he stared intently at her
"She's been quite worried about you, ever since she brought you here with the help of some other young men."
Heero frowned at that thought. He would discuss it with Relena later; he needed to know more.
"There isn't much else," the doctor turned to leave, but stopped right in front of the door, saying, "oh, and if you're wondering, you've been in an unconscious state for two days."
Two days! Dr. J would've never accepted this. And Relena could've been seriously hurt, or even kidnapped. But she wasn't. Stop blaming yourself for everything that's gone astray in your life. Don't focus on the past; pay more attention to your future. You can't change the past, but you can change your future. Stupid self-conscious, always telling him what to do. But Heero had to admit – it was right. I'm always right. That's what I'm here for. Now just relax. Heero laid back down onto the single pillow. However uncomfortable this was, he had seen worse. Closing his eyes, his mind drifted back to Relena. Where was she when he had been searching for her? Why did she just appear mysteriously at his feet? Thoughts, worries, questions, and possible answers filled his head.
A girl stepped in. Her hair was the color of ripened wheat in the late summer, and it cascaded freely down her back in shimmering waves. She had eyes the color of a shallow, sun-bathed lagoon somewhere in the Caribbean, bordered by pure, beautiful grains of white sand filtering through your toes and fingers. One could just look into her eyes and drown in them forever. Her face looked as if it had been sculpted by Leonardo da Vinci or Michaelangelo, a astounding piece of art. A human masterpiece. A mortal goddess. A light, airy summer dress the color of her stunning eyes clung to her flawlessly shaped body perfectly.
Heero gaped at his angel, to the point where saliva was dripping slowly down his chin. Relena giggled, obviously amused by his reaction, and ran over to him, pulling him tightly into her embrace. She felt so good to be in his arms, for the first time in two days she felt safe. Snuggling closer to his muscled body, she rested her delicate head on his shoulder.
Heero could feel it overwhelming his body, with its quick advances. He was drowning in those beautiful eyes again. Discovering his own amazement with her, he pressed her closer to him, never wanting to let. He wanted to stay like this forever. His heart skipped beats, as his hormones raced within his body.
A sharp cry from outside the door broke Heero out of his trance-like state of mind. Still holding Relena tight against his chest, he lifted her up in the air. Relena was dazed by this sudden movement, and giggled in pleasure. Heero went up to the door and slammed it shut, his face held an expression of seriousness, yet a smile tugged at his lips.
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Author's Note: For some of you – to explain a question that some people might have – Relena wasn't that worried about Heero because he had survived many other more hazardous situations – for example, in Endless Waltz when he fainted after attempting to kill Mariemaia (he was so sweet in that part! *starry eyes*) That part with Heero and Relena in each other's arms. Its sorta symbolic – because naturally, after killing all those people, Heero's hands will be forever tainted with blood. As will the rest of him, and Relena is so pure, like an angel. The angel and the demon. It wasn't meant to turn out like that, but I was just writing one day, and that's how it eventually turned out. It was better than I thought it would be! ^_^ Just About Enough is a song by Sarina Paris. I didn't want this to be a song fic, so I'm gonna include the lyrics at the end for those of you who might be interested. Again...reviews are GREATLY appreciated!!! P.S. My notes on the song are in the darker, smaller font.
Later Notes: You're Unbelievable is a song title, I know that, and that it was featured in Coyote Ugly, and that its not my kind of music, its like punk or a kind of rap. A lot of lyrics are just "you're unbelievable", and that's basically it.
So... what're all you naughty people out there thinking? Eh? The question is: What'll Heero do with Relena, alone in a room? Guess you'll just have to watch for the next chapter and read it, 'cuz there's no way I'm telling you! But I'll tell you this: I've got some plans for the next chapter!
(I could never of lasted as long as Relena did...it might of been true love and all, but still, I couldn't have taken it. I would just be waiting forever...or so it seems. *hint*hint* I know that most of you are anxiously waiting for some good Heero and Relena scenes. I can't wait to get there...I love Heero and Relena sap. I included some in this chapter though).
Just About Enough,
Just About Enough,
Just About Enough,
Just About Enough,
Just About Enough, can't take anymore of you.
Just About Enough, got me over the edge.
Just About Enough, you don't give me what I deserve.
I'm no fool, gotta get away from you.
After all you put me through,
Boy, I'm still in love with you.
Although, you don't seem to care,
You keep pushing my love down the stairs.
You got me crying,
So I'm leaving you behind.
Just About Enough, can't take anymore of you.
Just About Enough, got me over the edge.
Just About Enough, you don't give me what I deserve.
I'm no fool, gotta get away from you.
I have given all to you,
Gotta change my point of view.
Cause all I get in return,
Is a heart getting torn apart.
You got me crying,
So I'm leaving you behind.
Just About Enough, can't take anymore of you.
Just About Enough, got me over the edge.
Just About Enough, you don't give me what I deserve.
I'm no fool, gotta get away from you.
Just About Enough,
Just About Enough,
Just About Enough,
Just About Enough,
Just About Enough,
Just About Enough,
Just About Enough,
Just About Enough,
Just About Enough, can't take anymore of you.
Just About Enough, got me over the edge.
Just About Enough, you don't give me what I deserve.
I'm no fool, gotta get away from you.
Just About Enough,
Just About Enough,
Just About Enough,
Just About Enough,
Just About Enough,
Just About Enough,
Just About Enough,
Just About Enough.
Don't get me wrong. I LUV HEERO! But he's to hard on himself and Relena....definitely Relena....and himself. There are ups and downs in everything...he proves this. He's the perfect soldier – indestructible, but he's too hard on himself and can't really feel emotions...
Later Notes: (as you can see...I'm experimenting with fonts.) I was really crazy and hyper the day I wrote my 'notes'. That's the consequence of eating a whole 1 lb. bag of M & M's by yourself. I promise to have the next chapter up soon...(I'm sorta laid back...k, I'm being too nice, I'm really lazy. ) I promise to have the next chapter up in a week. Besides, my chapters are really long! It takes longer. So can you please tell me in the reviews if I should keep the 6 page long chapter minimum thing I have set up now, or should I have shorter chapters? Also – please, please review. It's what keeps me writing. Trust me. I'm ecstatic when I get one review and I start working on the next chapter right away. What'll happen when I get...let's say 5-10 reviews? Review and find out!
