Tennessee, July 21 1947
It was Danny Jr.'s fifth birthday today.
As was their custom, Evelyn and Rafe had taken him out to town in the morning. Danny Jr. loved visiting the myriad toy shops, especially the one stocked full of model and toy planes. Evelyn had bought him a brand new one for his birthday, but that didn't deter the young boy in any way from insisting on his customary visit to the toy plane shop. How like him! thought Evelyn indulgently as she watched him study each model in the toy shop with his usual eagerness and seriousness.
In the evening, they returned home to one of Evelyn's sumptuous home-cooked meals, and then to relaxing by the fireplace. Danny Jr. was busy running around in the field with his new plane in one hand, and his old one in the other. He was looking around him fervently. As if there was somebody he expected, Evelyn thought.
***
Evelyn was more right than she had known.
Danny Jr. knew his father would show up. It was his birthday, after all. He was always here on weekends, on his birthday, and on Christmas and Thanksgiving. He knew he would come today.
It had been two years since his father had first come to him. But Danny Jr. still hadn't told him, still hadn't told his father that he knew who he was. Today was extra special. Not only was it his birthday, it would be the day he told. It would be the day he finally got to call him "Daddy".
The five-year-old had thought about it for a long time. His one fear was that his father would stop coming to see him once he knew that his secret had been discovered. But he couldn't hold it anymore. He was about ready to burst with curiosity. Why doesn't he want me to know? Why doesn't he want me to tell Mother and Uncle Rafe?
Besides, he was five now. He was older. His father ought to trust him to keep a secret already, after having seen how he'd kept it for two years.
He heard a familiar voice. "Hey Danny!"
Danny Jr. squinted. In the distance, he saw the shadowy figure of his father waving at him. He smiled, then steeled himself as he sprinted towards him. He was going to need all the nerve he could get, to confront his father with the secret he'd been keeping for him since 1945. He gripped his toy plane tighter. He knew he could do it.
***
Danny had been faithfully visiting his son and watching Rafe and Evelyn for the past few years. The guilty feeling was still present, but he had learned to ignore it.
As Danny Jr. drew closer, Danny could see something was up. Other than it being his birthday, that was. He could see that his son was vaguely disturbed by something. "Happy Birthday, Danny," he said, drawing him in for a hug. "I brought you a present."
He held out his hand. In it was an old, battered looking toy plane. Danny Jr.'s troubled look was momentarily displaced by one of curiosity.
"It's my own old toy plane," explained Danny. "I want you to have it."
Danny Jr. put his other two planes aside and picked up the one Danny offered to him. His small hand closed around its body, and as he examined it his childlike smile returned. He looked up at Danny. "Thank you," he said.
"You're welcome," said Danny. It had been such a long time since he'd played with that plane. It would please him, he knew, to see it being used again by his son. "Want to go play with it?"
Danny Jr. bit his lip and shook his head. "Actually, I just wanted to talk with you...Uncle Danny."
Aha! thought Danny. He'd known it! Something was wrong. "What's the matter, Danny?" he asked gently.
Danny Jr. looked at the ground and fidgeted. "I..."
Danny looked at him curiously. "You..."
"I know who you really are," blurted Danny Jr., keeping his eyes fixed to the ground.
Panic gripped Danny. No! he thought. It can't be. It can't be. He faked a laugh. "Of course you know who I am. I'm Uncle Danny. I told you right from Day One."
His son looked up and faced him with clear, knowing brown eyes. Danny had a sudden flashback at that moment. I feel like I'm looking into a mirror, he thought. A mirror that shows you in your youth.
"You told me your name was Danny, but you didn't tell me who you really, truly were...Daddy,"
Danny froze with shock. His son's voice, though slightly nervous, shone through with confidence. It's no use lying any more, thought Danny. He knows. He turned to avoid his son's penetrating gaze, and walked towards the endlessly sprawling field where they usually played in the evenings.
Danny Jr. ran after him. "Why didn't you tell me earlier, Daddy?"
Danny paused. Isn't that obvious? he wondered. I'm a ghost! He turned to look at Danny Jr.
But his face was trusting and open. There was not a hint of fear in it. Danny began to take heart. "Danny, do you know your father's dead? That he died way back in 1942?"
Danny Jr. nodded.
Well, this is...interesting. thought Danny. "If he were to return to you now, he would be...a ghost," he ventured.
Danny Jr. nodded again. "So you must be a ghost."
He really isn't afraid! thought Danny. He sighed, and raised his gaze to meet his son's. Then he smiled, silently, and gave a single affirming nod.
***
I knew it! thought Danny Jr.
He was sitting with his father on the wing of Rafe's plane again. Just as they had been doing on the day they had first met. He'd tried to ask questions, but all his father seemed to want to do was sit with him, quietly. He was happy to oblige. It would also give him a chance to take in the new situation.
Finally, his father turned to him. "I never meant to hurt you, Danny, by not telling you the truth," he started.
Danny Jr. cocked his head to one side. "I know," he said. "But how come you didn't tell me?"
Danny looked down at his hands and started twiddling his thumbs. "Well, I kind of thought you'd be scared of me. Because I'm, you know, dead."
Danny Jr. laughed. He couldn't help it. "I was only three years old. That isn't old enough to start being scared yet."
His father paused, as if caught by surprise, then started to laugh too. "That's a strange way of looking at things. Most people claim to be old enough to stop being scared." He ruffled his son's hair affectionately. "But I guess you're right. It takes a certain age before the conventions of society catch up to you."
Danny Jr. hadn't understood all of the last sentence, but he understood that his father knew he wasn't scared.
Danny continued. "I was also afraid that you'd tell your mother and Uncle Rafe that you'd seen me."
"I don't understand," said Danny Jr. "Why don't you want them to see you? They miss you very much."
His father sighed. "I know. I miss then too, Danny, more than you could ever imagine." He looked directly into his son's eyes. "But I can't let them know I'm around. Don't you see? They're perfectly happy now, and if I interfere all I'll do is upset them. Don't tell them, Danny. Please."
Danny Jr. saw in a flash that his father was right. He was different, because he had no memories of losing his father, as his mother and Uncle Rafe had of losing a friend. "I won't tell, Daddy," he said resolutely.
His father smiled, and gave Danny Jr. a hug. "Good boy."
Danny Jr. watched as his father looked at the house, a tiny figure in the distance. He jumped off the plane suddenly, and took Danny Jr.'s hand in his. "Let's go back to your house, Danny," he said. "I think I'd like to look at your mother and your Uncle Rafe before the sun comes up."
***
Rafe was in the livingroom, flipping idly through a photo album. Evelyn had gone up to bed earlier, but he had lingered. Somehow the idea of a memorial had really took hold of his mind and wouldn't let it go. He wondered if it was possible to petition for a committee of some sort to be set up, to see to this task of monumental importance.
He glanced up and out of the window absently, and was about to look down again when he saw something that made his eyes widen.
Danny Jr. was sitting on the wing of his plane, cradling a toy plane in his arms, and next to him was a familiar silhouette. The silhouette of a man he thought he would never see alive again.
He rubbed his eyes and blinked, and the silhouette was gone. Danny Jr. had jumped off the plane and was heading back home. I'm seeing things, thought Rafe.
***
Danny had chosen to be invisible for the rest of the night. He stood by as Rafe tucked his son into bed, and blew Danny Jr. an unseen kiss. Then he followed Rafe as he returned to the livingroom, and watched him sit down with a piece of paper and a pen. Rafe, writing? Danny wondered. The only time he had ever seen Rafe write anything willingly was when he wrote letters to Evelyn. He moved as close as he dared, and peered over curiously.
Deer Sirs and Madamms,
We the undersigned, wish to ask the Govemment of the Teritory of Hawaii to erect a memoryal to honor the lifes lost in the bombing of Pearl Harbor on December 7 1941...
Danny smiled silently in pride. His best friend's spelling hadn't improved a bit, but his heart was sincere. He really was trying to make the memorial become reality. Rafe, you're the best friend ever!
He watched Rafe for a few more minutes as he struggled with spelling and wording, wishing he could go over and help him, and thank him. Then he faded out.
***
Author's Note:
If you've noticed, the chapters seem to be growing longer. So do the Author's Notes. I do apologise. Remember, you can always skip this and go right on the the review box. *wink*
Anyway, hope you liked Chapter Four. I think Chapter Five will be the last of "Watching". A warning: Chapter Five is going to be making great quantum leaps in timeframe. I hope nobody minds. I'll try to make it digestible. As always, do read and review. ~HuntressMinerva
