There was a challenge floating around a.s.c., affectionately known as "Die Seven Die." Somehow I found it irresistible. Disclaimer: They own them. I rhyme them.
Final Diagnosis
by Cybermum
"She's dead, Captain" the Doctor cried
And Janeway saw he hadn't lied.
Seven of Nine lay still and pale.
"I've tried it all to no avail.
CPR and electro-shock
I even used a beta-block."
The medic sobbed in deep distress
"I fear I've made a dreadful mess."
The Captain raised a single brow
And asked him quite succinctly "How?"
The EMH took a deep breath
And looked down on the face of death.
"I thought that if I could correct
One insignificant defect
Just one inconsequential flaw
A small one that few others saw."
Tom Paris rushed into sickbay
Exhibiting intense dismay
His manner short and quite abrupt
"I'm sorry Ma'am to interrupt
But there is something you should know"
He saw the Borg and cried "Oh no
Is she..?" He halted with a jerk.
"I knew it. Damn. It didn't work."
B'Elanna Torres arrived next
The Captain looked at her, perplexed.
"Lieutenant you will tell me, now,
Exactly what, or why and how
Our one and only real Borg
Has turned this place into a morgue?"
The engineer replied, aghast.
"Captain, I'd rather not be asked."
When Neelix stepped into the room
It wasn't easy to assume
That it was a coincidence;
His manner was far too intense.
"Am I too late? Can I stop it?"
"Shut up." Hissed Tom. "Just drop it."
He gazed upon the bio-bed.
"Oh my," he said. "She's really dead."
Harry Kim, quite pale and flustered
Joined the group that now had clustered
Closely around the former drone.
He gasped and couldn't help but moan.
"If I'd been a little faster
Could we have stopped this disaster?"
And with a sad sigh he noted
"Now I'll never be promoted."
"I assume she is still alive."
Said Tuvok, the next to arrive.
When informed of the Borg's demise
He said "Well then I do surmise
The procedure that we had planned
Has gotten slightly out of hand."
"And sadly there is no reverse."
Wept the Doctor, feeling much worse.
Captain Janeway had had enough
It was time, she thought, to get tough.
"All right" she shouted through the din
"Report. Right now. Tuvok. Begin."
The sudden silence in the room
(As if after a sonic boom)
Was heavy with expectation.
He searched for an explanation.
But just then one more arrival
Gave them all hope of survival.
Chakotay strode into the fray.
(What a literary cliché!)
"Commander" Captain Janeway said
"It appears that Seven is dead."
"So it would seem" the man replied.
And we'll explain just how she died."
"When Seven came aboard our ship
The Doc removed a microchip
And a cybernetic junction
Which we learned controlled each function
Of her physical condition
And her mental disposition.
It soon became quite apparent
That her behaviour was aberrant."
"I didn't know" the Doctor said
"There weren't instructions to be read."
Tom Paris stepped up to the plate
Hand in hand with his Klingon mate.
"Each of us tried to reconnect
The components to no effect."
"I even tried Leola root."
Neelix' distress was quite acute.
"I tested methods logical
As well as biological."
"I taught her music. Well I tried"
Sighed Harry Kim. "But then I died."
"I tried things intellectual
And then I tried things sexual."
"Chakotay" Janeway did respond
To this: "That was a bit beyond"
Tuvok's timely interjection:
"Captain, it was my direction."
She nodded and she pursed her lips
She placed her hands upon her hips.
"And then?" She fixed him with a stare:
The infamous Janeway death glare.
"There was another side effect
We were attempting to correct."
"As Seven became more unique
Certain regions of her physique"
The Doctor was a bit hard pressed
But kept on gamely with the rest
"Initially beneficial
And completely artificial
Grew slightly out of proportion
Leading to fatal contortion
Of her upper dorsal sector
Which did adversely affect her.
We tried every way to deflate
Them, but alas it was too late.
Those units that were over blown
With most unstable silicone
Eventually overloaded.
And then finally exploded."
