IN SICKNESS AND IN
HEALTH
DISCLAIMER: The story is
mine, but the main characters belong to Warner Brothers and Shoot the Moon
Productions. I am making no money from
this. Please do not redistribute this
story without my permission.
TITLE: In Sickness
and In Health
AUTHOR: panda (panda@hksys.com)
RATING: PG-13 for
sensitive subject matter.
TIMELINE: The prologue
takes place 4th season, immediately after "Do You Take This Spy";
the body of the story takes place 10 years into their marriage, the epilogue
one year later.
SUMMARY: Amanda
Stetson discovers she has breast cancer.
DATES WRITTEN: April 30 –
June 10, 2001
AUTHOR'S NOTES: This story
is a tribute to Kate Jackson's own battle with breast cancer. Her courage and determination can serve as a
model for us all. This is the hardest
story I've written and it wouldn't have gotten this far without the help of my
wonderful team of beta readers – thanks, ladies. I'd also like to extend a special thanks to my partner-in-crime,
dixonhill, for prodding me along during the long weeks it took to get this
story down, and for assuring me that this story could indeed be told.
MEDICAL FACTS: Although I
conducted extensive research into breast cancer to write this, I have used
vastly simplified medical information in the story itself. My intention was not to bore you by writing
a case study, but to write a story that focused on the emotional and
psychological impact of breast cancer.
I do, however, highly encourage you to visit the imaginis website at www.imaginis.com to inform yourself about
this insidious, but highly treatable, disease.
STATISTICS: During the
1990's, there were an average of 100.6 cases of breast cancer per 100,000
women. Among those diagnosed, the
5-year survival rate averaged at 85%, with the best survival rates occurring
with early detection. In the U.S., only
66.9% of women over the age of 40 have had a mammogram within the last two
years. It is estimated that, in the
year 2001, 40,200 women will die from breast cancer. (Statistics taken from the imaginis website.)
Prologue
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
. . . to have and to hold
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I woke as the early morning
light streamed in through a gap in the hotel curtains. I could dimly hear the sounds of someone
showering, a ding from a distant elevator, the faint ring of a telephone.
Married -- I almost couldn't
believe it. I was so happy. The weight of the ring on my finger seemed
to mirror the weight of my husband on the other side of the bed, tangible,
alive. His soft snores caused me to
grin like a schoolgirl.
Oh, but last night . . .
last night I sure hadn't felt like a schoolgirl. The sensations he evoked -- his touch, his caresses, his kisses
-- made me feel very much a woman in a way that been all too lacking over the
last several years.
He stirred and rolled over,
facing me. His features were so soft in
sleep, so boyish. I reached out my hand
and lightly traced a line from his eyebrow down to the corner of his
mouth. In the soft light of early
morning his whiskers were already evident, his lips slightly parted, his lashes
dark against his cheeks. I ran my
finger across his bottom lip and he murmured, waking.
"Mmm . . . mornin'," he
muttered as he opened his eyes -- those wonderful, deep, soul-piercing hazel
eyes.
"Good morning," I said as I
leaned in for a light kiss. "How'd you
sleep?"
"Fantastic," he responded as
he pulled me closer. "I had the most
incredible dream."
"Oh?" I turned so my back was to him, snuggling
deep into his arms, feeling completely enveloped in warmth and security.
"Mm, hmm," he whispered, his
breath tickling the back of my neck.
"There was this beautiful woman, and a ceremony, and then . . ."
"Yes?" Chills ran up and down my spine.
". . . the most incredible
night of my life," he finished as he kissed my ear.
"Funny, I had the same
dream," I managed to say as his lips caressed my neck. "Only mine featured a dashing spy."
"Mmm, that is funny. How 'bout we try and create another dream
this morning?" he suggested, suddenly
turning my body to face him. The love
and desire I saw in his eyes caused my breath to catch in my throat.
"I suppose I could manage
that," I gasped as his mouth descended toward mine. His kiss was tender at first, but soon became more demanding,
more insistent. I returned his kiss
with abandon, my own rising desire seeking an outlet in the arms of this man,
my husband.
A moan rose from deep in his
throat, expressing his eagerness to resume the exploration we had begun last
night. His hand moved to caress me, his
fingers tracing an intricate pattern across my body. I returned his touch, running my hands across his bare shoulders,
enjoying the feel of his muscles rippling beneath his skin.
The feeling of skin on skin,
something we had explored only minimally while dating, now served to
demonstrate our love for each other, affirming the promise of our future. Our complete surrender was revealed as we
explored each other, learning the tender spots, the ticklish places, the areas
that set each of us on fire.
As we joined ourselves, his
firm, muscular body filling my softer one, there was a confirmation of
commitment -- a commitment begun in friendship, strengthened in partnership,
and given voice to in the vows we had shared.
A commitment now deepened by the uniting of our flesh, as, vulnerable in
our nakedness, we gave of ourselves wholly, unconditionally.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~