Evil Can Be Fun - Chapter Two

Ooooh, I am in so much trouble. ;_; I did something stupid last
night. I went and wrote, of all things, an outline for this story. I wrote
out all the things I wanted to do with this story. And then I brainstormed
as to how to accomplish all those objects. *cries* I came up with a
summary that was SEVEN PAGES LONG!!! And I wasn't even done yet!
And now I'm going to feel compelled to actually write out the whole story,
too...damnit. I shoulda known it would be a bad idea. *sighs* Oh well.
Too late now, I suppose. I'll just get on with the story.

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"You can count on me, Zelas-sama! *big smile*"

:*chuckle* I certainly hope so. Oh, and Lina-chan, stop interfering
with Xelloss's orders. You're going to get him in trouble with me if you
keep preventing him from joining your group.:

"...Do I have to, Zelas-sama?"

:Yes, you do, Lina-chan. And, for Ruby-Eye's sake, try to get along!:

"...Hai, Zelas-sama."

Lina pouted, as her Master closed the mind link. She didn't want to
let Xelloss into the group, and she certainly didn't want to try and get
along with him. But when it came directly from the powers-that-fry-your-
butt-if-you-don't-obey, you didn't argue. Sighing, she hopped off the bed
she had been sitting on while communicating with the Greater Beast.
Snagging her cape and gloves off a nearby chair, she put them on, tucked
her few belongings into a sub-dimensional pocket, then exited the small
bedroom, heading down the hallway of the inn.

The instant she stepped into the common room, a purple haired
fruitcake glomped her. "Heeeey Lina-chan! Didja miss me?"

Lina screamed. "Get off me you damn fruity bastard! And watch-"
this while she yanked him off her back and pulled him over her shoulder
onto the ground, "where you put-" then proceeding to pummel said fruity
bastard into a glob of purple jam, "your HANDS!" Straightening up, she
put her hands on her hips, observing her handiwork. Nudging him with
her foot, she muttered, "And get up. We need to discuss where we're
going with the others." (Chibi-Lina: What are you looking at? That IS me
trying to get along!)

The purple jam jiggled slightly. "Yes Lina-chan." It croaked.

Feeling much better now that she'd let off some steam, Lina
skipped up to the table where her other companions were seated. "Hey
everybody. Let's eat!"

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Lina was hungry. Very very very very hungry. Never mind that she
had just had a large breakfast. That's not the kind of hungry I'm talking
about. That meal was just for fun. The kind of hunger Lina was suffering
from at the moment was the kind that could only be relieved by a nice
large serving of negative emotion. Something that was currently
conspicuously absent from her traveling party.

Feeding yourself as a mazoku is not as easy as you might think. At
least, not when you're masquerading as a journeying human. Sure, most
of the world's population at any given time is as miserable as a mazoku
could want. But as a rule, you generally didn't find lots of miserable
people on a road in the middle of the forest. They're smarter than that.
They know that misery loves company, and stay at home. Feeding
becomes significantly harder when your traveling companions consist of
one of the worlds only known perpetual sources of positive emotion (the
other currently ruling in Saillune), a brainless, and therefore worry-less
swordsman, a discreetly excited and hopeful chimera (they were following
yet another lead for a cure), and a happy mazoku. Yes, the last is very
odd, but it's a paradox to ponder on another day. Preferably when she
isn't so hungry.

Needless to say, Lina was feeling desperate. And as desperation
often breeds ingenuity, she soon came up with a solution to her problem.
A self-perpetuating illusion loop of herself walking in deep thought, a
couple of perimeter alarm spells to let her know when somebody
approached, and a quick thought tendril to Xelloss were all she needed to
feel secure enough to teleport away into the forest.

Phasing into being above a town they had neither passed through,
or were going to pass through (Chibi-Lina: Heh, though it might be
amusing to walk into a town and have people start screaming 'Demon,
Demon!'. And not at Zelgadiss either. ^_^), Lina looked around for a
suitable target. As a rule, she preferred to pick on bullies. Oh, not for
any altruistic motive. It's just that usually they were ready-made bundles
of anger, violence, and superiority. Very tasty, and it was oh-so-satisfying
to strip the superiority and anger away layer by layer until all that was left
was a mindless flesh ball of terror and pain. Variety is the spice of life.

Drifting quietly over the rooftops, a spiking of fear in a nearby ally-
way caught her attention. Drinking it in as she moved closer, she spied a
big burly drunk trying to force himself on what looked to be a young
woman buying groceries. Though what the idiot was doing drunk at this
time of the morning, Lina didn't know, she did know that it didn't matter
in the least. Lina could feel the heat of his wine-fueled anger and lust
from where she was floating. Smiling wickedly, she phased out.

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Sometimes, you just know when a day is going to be bad. Randy,
Lina's unsuspecting target, hadn't a clue. In fact, he had thought the day
was going pretty well, being already nice and inebriated and having a
pretty little thing to have a good time with. The fact that she was
struggling didn't hamper him at all. No, Randy really had no idea that
today was going to suck. Massively.
Moments later, Randy got his first clue, when someone tapped him
on the shoulder. Snarling, he whirled around to meet the eyes of a
diminutive young woman. Blood red, slitted eyes, that, far from
containing the innocence one associates with one so young looking, held
massive amounts of hunger. Oh yes, and evil. Let us not forget the evil.
Poor Randy. For him, today was most definitely not a good day to
be alive.

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Smiling happily, Lina delicately licked a few splatters of blood off
her fingertips. Slurping up the last of the negative energy generated by
the stupid mortal's death, she patted her stomach contently, though in
reality, the meal she just completed had nothing to do with her digestive
system. She was just about to toss a rotted blanket over the corpse,
when she felt a wellspring of dark power standing at the foot of the ally.
A little irritated to be disturbed, she called out without looking back.
"Don't you know it's rude to interrupt someone who's eating?"

"OOOH HOHOHOHOHOHO!"

Lina felt a chill run down her spin at this first indication that
perhaps she had made a very large mistake. When she felt the dark
presence behind her, she had assumed that it was a mazoku, one equal
to her level or above. But that laugh...it couldn't be..."Please let it be
anyone but..."

"It is I, Naga the White Serpent, sexiest and most powerful ally and
rival of Lina Inverse. Turn and face your downfall, mazoku!"

Cringing in the face of that laugh, Lina slowly turned around, not
bothering to replace the illusion that hid her kitty-slit eyes. She stared at
her former partner. ~Well,~ she thought, ~she's still wearing that
hideous bikini. But where on earth did all that negative energy come
from? She's practically breathing it!~

Naga's eyes widened in surprise, but she quickly covered it.
"OOOH HOHOHO. When that mousy little village girl came squealing to
me, crying about a demon, I certainly hadn't expected it to be you, Lina
Inverse! Oh, how the mighty have fallen! OOH HOHOHO! Now I really
am the most powerful sorceress in the world!"

Lina sweatdropped. "You haven't changed, have you?" She
narrowed her eyes, examining her old companion. ~Was this massive
energy always there, and I simply didn't have the means to feel it? She
certainly can't have been tapping into it. If she had been, she WOULD be
more powerful than I.~ "You're looking...well."

Naga let out another laugh, her massive chest heaving. "Of course
I'm looking well. I'm the great Naga the White Serpent! I can't say the
same for you though, little Lina. Those evil eyes do absolutely nothing
for you. And apparently becoming a demon didn't help your figure any.
You're still as flat as ever! OH HOHOHOHO!"

Lina could feel veins popping as she attempted to restrain herself
from shoving her fist down the hussy's throat. ~Now now, Lina, don't be
hasty. You can kill the bitch AFTER you find out where all that energy is
coming from.~ Still twitching slightly, she forced herself to reply.
"Actually Naga, now that I'm a mazoku, I can choose any form I want. It's
just that being mistaken for a hooker tends to undermine the sinister
image we demons go for." ~Not to mention that a drastic increase in bust
size is something even Gourry wouldn't miss. On second thought,
especially Gourry. It would blow my cover for sure.~

If Naga was insulted, she gave no sign. It was hard to tell if she
even realized that that WAS an insult. "No matter, Lina Inverse. Your
looks will soon cease to matter. I had been looking forward to proving
my superiority over you in battle, Lina, but it's too late for that now. I'll
just put you out of your misery, while at the same time saving this
helpless town from the destruction you would surely have caused."

Lina groaned and smacked her forehead. "Naga, you moron, being
turned into a mazoku increased my power, not the other way around!"
But Naga wasn't listening. Instead she was quite busy casting a spell.

"DEMONA CRYSTAL!!"

Sighing, Lina phased out of the way of the malformed ice lances.
She re-appeared floating above the nearby tavern. She frowned. Clearly,
neither Naga's skill nor power had increased since the last time Lina had
seen her. Which would seem to indicate that the dark energy she
radiated had always been there. She wasn't tapping into it, and it didn't
have the feel of regular mazoku energy, now that Lina thought about it.
But there was something decidedly familiar about it...when had she last
felt energy like this?

Absently dodging the blasts that Naga, who had cast a Raywing and
followed her into the air, was throwing at her, she concentrated on
searching her recent memory. It was there, in the back of her mind, just
out of reach...she glanced at Naga, who was breathing a bit heavily, but
still tossing out attacks like Elmykia Lance, and Demona Crystal regularly.
The mid-morning sun flashed on the woman's long dark hair, bringing
out the hidden purple highlights. ~You know,~ Lina mused, ~it's
interesting how closely Naga's hair color resembles Rezo's...Of course,
that's it! Rezo...who contained a piece of Shabranigdu! That's when I felt
it! When we battled Lord Ruby-Eye, the power he gave off felt exactly like
this!~ Well, perhaps not exactly like this, the power that Shabranigdu had
given off had been freed, whereas the power that Naga gave off was
tightly contained. Which would explain why Lina hadn't been able to feel
it before. But this...this was wonderful! Another piece of the Dark Lord
to be resurrected! Zelas-sama would be so pleased!

Laughing delightedly, Lina finally turned her full attention back to
Naga. Shaking the no-no finger at her, Lina smiled. "Naga, you are in for
a special treat! A position of honor and great power is yours for the
taking. Why don't you cease this silly fighting and come with me?"

For a moment, Naga looked disconcerted, but she recovered
quickly and laughed. "Did you think you could fool me, Naga the White
Serpent, with such an obvious trick? Clearly, you wish to quit this losing
battle and trick me into entering your evil lair where your demonic
companions will be waiting to ambush me."

Lina beamed like a proud parent. "That's great Naga, you almost
got it right! But since you saw through me so easily, we'll have to do this
the hard way." Pulling a wooden bat out of her sub-dimensional pocket,
SDP for short, Lina teleported directly behind Naga and beaned her over
the head with it (Chibi-Lina: You were expecting, maybe, subtlety?).
Putting the bat away, she caught the unconscious Naga in her arms.
Grinning, she quickly sent a mental 'go-home' dart at Xelloss before she
phased out. He certainly wouldn't want to miss this!

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Huh. Well, after struggling with this chapter for almost a week, I finally
just chucked away most of it, and filtered out the stuff I liked. Which
made the chapter much shorter, but more streamlined too. But
whadevah. Please Read and Review. Or email me at
Madame_Meow@hotmail.com. I warn you, if you email me, I won't be
able to respond right away. I'm currently internet-less, and I'm posting
this from my universities lab computer. But I will get to you eventually. I
promise ^_^.