*This is Keli's neesan, Jenn

*This is Keli's neesan, Jenn! She said I could write this! Since she decided to spoof one of our friend's stories, I decided to spoof hers, since there were some things that didn't go the way I wanted. (To Keli: This is for not putting me in your damned stories very much when you were in one of mine! And you got to kill Regis Philbin!!) Read some of my Evil Game show things, they have the same characters from the 'Legacy side of Keli's fic, and I almost got sent to a shrink for the Survivor one! EvilGameshowHostess is the name, parodies are my game. (Okay, that sounded stupid… But I need more reviews!)

Keli and Duo, the mystery-couple!

Keli: ::walks around in mall. Looks in stores such as B+BW, Claire's, and Rave for girly stuff. She conveniently spots Duo while in the Body Shop:: Hey Duo, what are you doing in the slut-shop?

Duo: Looking for some more hair accessories. I have fun on the weekends just combing my hair and putting little barrettes in it.

Keli: You're screwed up.

Duo: I know.

Keli: Well, what do we do? We're flirting constantly in this series, and yet I have yet to make it official if we're a couple or not.

Duo: Yeah, you need to make it clearer for the audience. Just like they never made it clear if that bitch, Relena had the hots for Heero or not. Or if Heero had the hots for me, or…

Keli: Yeah, but I went out of my way to make sure that no one thought that.

Duo: You're just hiding your feelings for me! ::pouts:: I'm hurt that you don't think of me as your sex toy!

Keli: Well, what am I supposed to do? Fuck you after every scene?

Duo: Maybe…?

Keli: Don't say that! You'll make them think that we do fuck!

Duo: But don't you want a lot of little Duo-Keli's running around?

Keli: ::muttering:: that's Rachel with the Duo-Keli's joke…

Duo: So? I think it's touching. Little Duo-Keli's would be cute.

Keli: Duo? Do you know what your talkin about?

Duo: No, do I ever? During your whole series you managed to undermine or make fun of me every time I said anything! Give me a little compensation!!

Keli: You pervert! ::slaps Duo:: You're too easy to make fun of!

Duo: It's not my fault if I'm lacking a brain, at least the way you think of me.

Keli: ::mutters:: that's not all your missing…

Duo: I heard that!

Keli: Ya know what? I'm sick of your bickering. Leave me alone.

Duo: But I want to tie you up and—

Keli: If you finish that fucking sentence, I will—hey, what will I do? I never follow through with any of my threats.

Duo: Nope, ya don't. That's why I can say stuff about you and you don't kill me. Plus, you STOLE my infatuation with death and destruction, and now you still squeal whenever you see a scythe that you haven't chopped someone's head off with.

Keli: So, sue me, death-boy!

Duo: Okay. ::Duo sues Keli for ten million dollars on ten counts of infringement. Keli's grandfather, whom she has been mooching off of for years, is now broke.:: Happy? I actually follow through with my threats.

Keli: Damn you, Maxwell.

Duo: ::Evil laugh:: Now you want to screw?

Keli: Um, that's left up to the readers. I really don't want to get into this…

((Jenn: I don't want to write a porno, here, this is only for comedic purposes.))

Duo: Damnit, well, are we a couple yet?

Keli: Whatever you want to think is okay with me.

Duo: Can we be hot and sexy teen drama lovers? Or porn stars?

Keli: Um, no.

Duo: Damnit…what about 'more than friends', or maybe spur-of-the-moment experimentation sex?

Keli: Stop it with the terms already, Duo. You're sick.

Duo: There you go with your making fun of me again!

Keli: You set yourself up for it, ya know that, don't 'cha?

Duo: Well, ::loudly:: I JUST WANT TO KNOW IF WE'RE A COUPLE YET, OR NOT!!!!

Keli: Well, if that's all you want to know—?

Duo: Yes, it is.

Keli: Then ::she stops right as the screen fades to black::

Duo: ::bursting through the black screen like a Loony Tunes character, with a little Duo-shape behind him:: Wait a minute! I want to know!!!

Keli: ::does the same thing that Duo did in a different part of the screen:: Well, too bad, because I don't want to decide, even though it's been established that we may be more than friends from the series.

Duo: ::whining annoyingly:: but I wanna…

Keli:: Finish that and I will kill you

Duo: Now you're stealing phrases from Heero!

Heero: I'm going to sue you. ::He appears beside Duo through the screen::

Keli: GO AHEAD! Duo took all of my money, so you couldn't get any if you tried!!

Lawyer: I'm sure we could work something out… ::was somewhere in the middle::

Keli: God damnit! What is wrong with you!!!

Lawyer: Hey, a percent of the cut is a percent of the cut. I've got to make a living, you know!

Keli: Stop suing me!!!

Duo: You stole my infatuations!

Heero: You stole my phrase.

Lawyer: And I need some more money! I'm adding to my already huge mansion. Again.

Keli: UGH!!! I thought we were discussing how me and Duo WEREN'T a couple! How did we go from that to suing for infringement!!

Duo: Hey, cash is cash, baby. And I'm one rich fucker now.

Keli: You'll be one dead fucker if you don't shut the hell up!!!!

Lawyer: ::to Duo:: you can sue her for threatening you.

Duo: I know, but once she's broke, she's broke.

Heero: I want some of that money too, she stole my phrase.

Keli: ::in a little-girl voice, to Duo:: I thought this was just between you and me, Duo.

Duo: Not anymore, babe. When money comes into play, I go to whatever side is rakin it in.

Keli: Sell-out.

Lawyer: Would you like to settle, or do we have to go to court?

Keli: I'm not giving another cent to you people!

Duo: That means we're goin to court! Have fun trying to keep what's left.

Keli: Duo, if you drop this right now, I'll consider making us a couple…

Duo: ::thinks for a minute:: I can buy a wife off of a colony, your money is what I want, Kellen!

Keli: NEVER CALL ME THAT!!! LAWYER!!!

Lawyer: Yes, I can help.

Keli: I'm suing him for suing me.

Lawyer: That can be arranged.

Keli: Thank you. You're going down, Maxwell

Duo: Ooh, I'm sooo scared of your idol threats, I'm shaking.

Keli: Weren't we in a store a minute ago?

Duo: Yeah, why?

Keli: Because we're in a court room now.

Duo: The amazing things that an author can do.

Jenn: Yep, I'm just amazing. Anything is possible when I'm at the keyboard!

Keli: You killed me off, bitch.

Jenn: Huh?

Keli: You killed me off at the end of the first ShootingStarr series! LAWYER!!!

Lawyer: Yes, paying customer?
Keli: I'm suing her for capital murder. That okay?
Lawyer: Yep, that can be arranged as well.

Jenn: HEY! You can't sue me! I'm the author of this!!!

Keli: Anything is possible, neesan.

Jenn: I don't know why I'm writing this, but I'm ending it. I got off of the subject, and now I can't get it back onto it.

THE END

And Keli and Duo go and fuck in one of the office buildings when the trial is over.