Untitled Document
The Hogwarts Letters

Part I

By: Ice Princess

A/N: This is my first attempt at humor, so I hope I do alright... Somehow this idea just came to mind, so I'm going to play around with it and see if it amounts to anything. Well, just read it and review if you'd like please. No flames though. Constructive criticism is welcome! But flames will be used for marshmallows. These are letters from and to the students and faculty at Hogwarts (and some other special people...), just incase you wanted to know... Now, read on.

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Dear Harry,
Just so you know... I'm still out there, and at large. I'm going to get you one day, as soon as I get all my strength back!
Lord Voldemort


Dear Lord Voldemort,
Good always defeats evil. I'm going to kill you once and for all as soon as you stop being a coward and stop hiding.
Harry Potter


Dear Jessica,
Don't tell Harry, but I think he's so cute!
Ginny Weasley


Dear Ginny,
I know you are obsessed with Harry Potter, but I really think Colin likes you! Why don't you give him a try?
Jessica Andrews


Dear Ron,
I know your sister likes me, but now she's writing letters about me. I found one on the ground. It's pretty freaky. I don't mind that much... It's just kinda overwhelming if you know what I mean... There's a dance this Friday at Hogwarts. I want to ask Hermione because I really really like her, but I'm too afraid to... Can you help me?
Harry Potter


Dear Harry,
I don't know what Ginny's problem is. She's too young to like someone! Sure, I'll help you with Hermione.
Ron Weasley


Dear Ron and Harry,
Ginny is NOT too young to like someone Ron! I can't believe you think that! And what is Ron going to help you with that has to do with me Harry???
Hermione Granger


Dear Hermione,
I agree with you. Ginny is old enough to start liking people... but why does it have to be me? She's writing letters about me! C'mon! And another thing... Don't read other people's mail! What Ron is helping me with is none of your business!
Harry Potter


Dear Hermione,
Ginny is much much much much much too young to like anyone or go out with anyone, and I will believe that of the rest of my life!
Ron Weasley


Dear Harry,
You're one to talk. You were reading Ginny's mail when she wrote a letter about you!
Hermione Granger


Dear Ron,
You are very very very very very very very very wrong! Two can play this game. See you at dinner!
Hermione Granger


Dear Jessica,
Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh! Harry read the letter I wrote you! Him and Ron were talking about it! How could you have lost it? I can't believe this! Now I won't be able to look him in the face at dinner tonight! Thanks a lot Jessica!
Ginny Weasley


Dear Ginny,
Calm down! Maybe you should give Collin Creevy a try now, huh?
Jessica Andrews


Dear Jessica,
You're not helping! I'm just been humiliated beyond description! I'm seriously sooooo embarassed! I suppose I should just forget about Harry. Tell Collin that I'm not going to the dance with anyone yet... incase he wants to ask me.
Ginny Weasley


Dear Mudblood,
You stink!
The Slytherins


Dear Slytherins,
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me! Wands might put curses on me as well... but I just used a Mud - er, I mean Muggle saying so wands wouldn't be appropriate for it... Anyway, my point was that I don't care what you say, so there!
Hermione Granger


Dear Potty,
You stink!
The Slytherins


Dear Slytherins,
You stink more than I do!
Harry Potter



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A/N: Well, that was the end of that. The next part will have a lot more stuff with more characters in it. Review 'n stuff now. Don't flame though! Thanx!