*Koume and Kotake are in the Spirit Temple, by a big cauldron*

*Koume and Kotake are in the Spirit Temple, by a big cauldron*

Koume: What do we have today, Kotake?

Kotake: Hee hee hee! A recipe for a warped fanfiction, Koume!

Koume: Excellent! Better than brainwashing Nabooru! What's first?

Kotake: One over-active child…*throws Skull Kid in the cauldron*

Koume: Two pieces of chocolate cake with caramel sauce…*cake is added to the brew*

Kotake: Stir lightly…*snaps fingers, and a big stick appears and stirs the mold*

Koume & Kotake: Add 1lb of sugar… A cherry lollypop…soda with no taste… Richard the dog…

Richard: Hoo-whine! *is added to brew*

Kotake: And Majora's Mask for Spice!

*all items are added*

Chica: *suddenly appears, looking angry, with a big sledgehammer* DIE KOUME! YOU GAVE ME SICKNESS! I MISSED MY PICNIC! DIEEEEEEEEEEE! *charges at Koume*

Koume: ACK! HELP, KOTAKE!

Kotake: Sister! *turns into Ice-Kotake* Hy-ya! *fires ice at floor*

Chica: Ack! *slips on ice, and plunges into the cauldron* NOOO!

*splash*

*cauldron bubbles and spews liquid*

Koume: Oh no! Adding Chica to the liquid has caused the unspeakable!

Ice-Kotake: It's a-a-a…

REALLY WARPED FIC!!!

Wierdo Narraratior: Once upon a time, in the land of Hyrule, there was peace. Well, no duh. With that fathead in the sacred realm, which should be capitalized, but I'm lazy. As I was saying about the fathead-

Ganon: HEY!

WN: It does NOT get capitalized, 'cause he is stupid-

Ganon: HEY!

WN: And fat… Did you see his 'Ganon' form? WHOO! Bigger than Fat- um, Fat Guy from Austin Powers 2-

Ganon: HEY!

WN: What do you want?

Ganon: Will you stop insulting me? I'm human too!

WN: Actually, you are a Gerudo. *under breath* idiot…

Ganon: THAT'S IT!!!!! LET ME OUT OF THIS STUPID REALM! I'M GONNA TAKE HYRULE SO EASY! *rumbles* AAAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHHHHHH!

*a portal opens, and Ganon jumps out*

WN: RUN FOR YOUR LIVES! THE FATHEAD IS BA—AAAAAAAHHHHHHH! *is silenced by a energy tellitubbie, yes an energy tellitubbie!*

Ganon: Freaky! *laughs in that corny way, so you see his nose for the monstrosity that it is*

*in the Chamber of Sages*

Rauru: I have terribal news…

All sages minus Rauru: Your whight-loss program failed?

Rauru: *sobs* How d-did y-you k-k-know?

Impa: You're bigger than ever?

Saria: You have to stand in the freaky water stuff 'cause your podum thingie broke when you stood on it?

Nabooru: Your robe is all ripped?

Darunia: You've been stealing the top serlion rocks from the Dondongo's Cavern?

Ruto: You're fatter than fat-head Ganon?

Ganon: *appears on the TriForce stand thingie* I'm not fat!

Ruto: Of course not.

Ganon: Thank you.

Saria: You're a fat nose and a fatter head!

Ganon: AAAGGHHH! DIE! *fires tellitubbie symbols at the sages, shrinking them to mini-sages, then traps them in crystals, exsept for Rauru, who, even at half size, wasn't small enough to be trapped* Ha ha ha! *dissapears with crystals*

Rauru: Oh no! They left me behind! *cries* Oh, wait! I better contact the hearos! *telepathicly finds out who the heros are* OH NO!!!

~TO BE CONTINIUED~

Who are the heros? Why is Rauru so scared? Will he ever be able to loose whight? What will happen in chapter 2? Will I ever shut-up? Sorry it's so short. Will the next chapter be longer? Find out when when we return to, THE WARPED FANFICTION!