TITLE: Watching & Waiting
AUTHOR: Goddess Isa
EMAIL: goddessisa@aol.com
SUMMARY: If I told you, you wouldn't need to read it.
SPOILER: Faith, Hope & Trick, Amends, The Zeppo - sort of. Faith never turned evil and this is set majorly in the future.
DISTRIBUTION: Sure, just email me & lmk where it's going - I like seeing my name in print =)
FEEDBACK: Please, I'd hate to have to Slay for it. =P
RATING: TV-14
DISCLAIMER: I don't own anyone but Holly & Kayla. Everyone else belongs to Joss Whedon. He can share though, I know he can, I just don't know why he doesn't..... Maybe it's 20th Century Fox and UPN and the WB that keep him from sharing. I dunno. They own them, not me.



She couldn't do it all again.

Didn't wanna do it again.

Watch a child, a daughter, come into this terrible world and be taken away too early because someone was afraid she might become a Slayer.

Faith couldn't look as she was being born. She closed her eyes and went to a far away place that didn't exist. Some happy planet with a house and a white picket fence. Some place where her daughter Kayla was still alive, running to the front door at warped speed every day to meet her father as he came home from work.

"It's a girl," Dr. Mayhew announced. "A beautiful, healthy baby girl."

Faith took that as her cue and sprinted out of there. The baby was fine, that was enough. She would be all right, for now, with her mother and her father to protect her.

Once she was outside, Faith threw up in the bushes. The memories of Kayla's birth and the short time they had together flooded her mind. She ended up sleeping in her car.


*****


The next morning, she changed in the backseat, threw a stick of gum in her mouth and went upstairs to see how the baby and her mother were doing.

"Hey," Faith said when she entered.

"Hey," both parents chorused.

Angel kissed the baby's head and then his wife's. "I'm gonna go catch a nap in the morgue. Dark, cold--" 

"Just like home," Faith joked.

Angel smirked at her before leaving.

"I'm surprised you came."

"Why?" Faith asked.

"I don't know, I guess....with Kayla...it's only been a year."

"I guess I thought maybe you'd need me. Or maybe she would."

"You are her Godmother."

Faith looked down, not sure she wanted that kind of responsibility. "What are you naming her?"

Buffy glanced at her sister-in-Slayage before looking back at the daughter in her arms. "Holly Nicole."

"Pretty." she thought it over. "You know what though, B?"

"Pageant-Head name, I know." Buffy smiled. "But maybe that's how it should be. Maybe she should be a beauty queen contestant. Or a soccer star. Or a nun if she wants."

"Anything but a Slayer?" Faith guessed.

Buffy almost thought better of it, but spoke her mind. "I saw what you went through with Kayla. I just can't do that with Holly."

"I understand. I didn't want that for her."

Buffy shrugged. "You had no choice."

"Like us?" her voice was raw. The bitterness was coming out.

"Worse. She was six years old Faith. She didn't even get a chance. They wiped her out before--"

"I-I know," Faith was quick to change the subject. "Has Xander been by to see her?"

"Are you kidding? I don't think he could handle it."

"Is he ever gonna come out of his shell?"

Buffy looked her square in the eye. "You tell me. You're his wife."