Disclaimer: Batman and Catwoman characters are not mine but are property of DC comics.
Conflict
Note: Any comments are appreciated.
________________________________________________________
"I imagine it's like being high", laughed Mark. "What do you think Sel?"
"I think that if you stick one more twinkie in your mouth your lung is likely to collapse under the weight."
I rested my head on the table in more of a bang than a gentle way. I figure a couple of more bangs like that and Mark's joke might actually be funny. I look back up and see him stick another twinkie in his mouth. Nope, still not funny. Looking around at the water cooler, I see Jay and the rest of guys trying to see how many cups he can stick in his mouth. I think the bet is $50 dollars for no more than 20.
Sigh.
This job wouldn't be so bad if I wasn't stuck with a bunch of men that thought I wanted to listen to how many ways one can play tomb raider so Lara Croft's body was positioned in a compromising way. If you know what I mean.
Looking at the clock again, I suddenly realize its only been 5 minutes. Boredom starts to set in so I turn my head toward the cheering co-workers who are watching Jay stick the 15th cup in his mouth. They're the small ones. The little ones that the company likes to give you so that you have to keep bending over to fill them up in the water cooler, I think they were invented for the boss-secretary relationship because if I had a nickel for every time I bent down for water and saw some guy staring at my rear, I think I could buy out Bill Gates.
"Hey Sel, did you know that the Bat stopped the Joker last night."
"Really Mark. I just figured that there was another man in a bat costume who took down clowns."
Mark just stood there wondering if my joke was innocent or not, so I smile and he continues talking. How strange that when you have a figure like mine, smiles go a long way.
"Well, it seems the Joker was making this laughing gas right." I nod, knowing the whole story already but tell him to continue.
"Anyways, it seems that the Bat took him down and saved this woman who is supposed to be the Bat's lover.
Suddenly laughing, I patted Mark on the shoulder.
"Yeah....right.......Batman having a lover.....wonder if he keeps her in his utility belt. "
"It's true. Heard from Jay."
"The same Jay that is stuffing cups in his mouth right now."
"Hey! You're just jealous Sel. Because you and all the other damsels of distress of Gotham can no longer hope that 'tall dark and handsome' is going to save you and make you Mrs. Batman. "
"You're absolutely right Mark. Because without Batman, the women of Gotham would only be left with a bunch of 'Marks' stuffing twinkies in their mouth."
"Jealously, thou art Selina."
I roll my eyes because I can tell Mark didn't like my comments. He always recites Shakespeare when he gets mad. One time I told him that he probably was abducted my aliens and most likely given a good probing when he stood up pretending that I stabbed him and said "Et tu Brute". Every time I went near him, he would start reciting the funeral speech of Antony's.
"Sorry Mark. You don't have to retell the story of Mac Beth to tell me your angry." I wouldn't have usually said sorry but last time I got an offer to star in the Broadway play 'Caesar' because I would unconsciously act it out on my way to work.
"Well anyways Sel. You think Bats and that woman are you know..."
"NO"
"Liar."
"What....he doesn't have the time. How many guys go around saving Gotham every single day, usually with major injuries and have the time for dinner and dancing on a Saturday night."
Besides I've given him those injuries 40% of the time.
"Ohhhhh.....I was joking before but I do believe you are jealous. The all powerful Selina, who doesn't need a man to open jars for her and kill bugs is jealous because prince charming has a princess."
"Mark...the day that I am dependent on ANY man is the day I owe you everything I own."
"May I get that written down on paper, because there is a nice Italian shelf in your living room that I would just love to have."
~~~^^**^^~~~
I'm still Catwoman. I say that a lot to myself these days. Especially since I've been working. Eh. I don't even like the words coming out of my mouth. I would rather be swinging off rooftops then finding out where they are. That's why they hired me. Well that and my sex appeal. I believe my job title is Director of Security and Maintenance. I'm higher up in the business scale than half the people here and it's only been 2 weeks. I could move up into a higher position
Hell!
I could take over the company in less than a week. I just rather work in the lower half.
I hate the big corporate businessmen. They're harder to handle. Literally, their suits are tailored badly and I find it hard to throw them at full force.
Anyways. My job is to secure the holdings of one Gotham's biggest clients. They're supposed to be bringing their Fire Heart collection to one of Gotham's museum. The Layhart. Its new. Opened up last month and as this is their first major exhibit I do like to be on the ground floor of it. That's why I'm here. I'm designing their security system.
I could have just so easily have stolen it from the poor smutchz who would have designed it in the first place, but I find this more challenging. What better way to find out how good you are than to secure every possible place that Catwoman is likely to get into. Plus the bonus part is that no one else but me can possibly get into it.
Don't get me wrong I'm a thief. But I wouldn't be much of a good one if I couldn't prevent other people from taking what was rightfully mine.
I stare at my computer screen as my e-mail pops up with an attachment.
"oh no...." I moan. I know what attachments mean. MORE WORK. Don't get me wrong. I can handle anything that comes my way but when you read the same garbage over and over again you start to regret that you don't have a loaded gun under your desk.
I laugh. I can see myself doing one of the Matrix scenes where my rifle is loaded and I come out nailing PCs right through the modem. Hit them where it hurts, I always say.
"CLICK ME"
Whatever you say e-mail man. I click on the attachment. My computer blacks out. I sit there and stare for a while trying to comprehend what action I will take. The Catwoman part of me wants to throw the computer at Mark.
The Selina part of me wants to throw it at Jay who passed out from sticking cups in his mouth.
I compromise. "MARK"
"Yeah SEL"
"You want to trade computers."
"Why"
I stare at him a little. One of my Bat stares. He cowers.
"Okay you can have my computer....lay off with the eyes."
I smile, one of those million-dollar glamour girl ones, and he doesn't regret his decision anymore.
"He will when he sees his modem."I'll be damned if I'm going to lose millions of dollars because someone decided to send me a virus. I open up Mark's browser and see a half naked girl staring back at me. .
She has implants, I can tell. Her breast look like cantaloupe. I imagine she has back problems. Well there goes my theory about Mark acting weird because he's gay.
Yahoo comes on soon enough and I type in Gotham Layhart Museum. I enter my name and the code "Project Beta". The screen goes green and a blueprint pops up with the layouts of the museum. I e-mail it to the big guys upstairs because tomorrow the exhibit is being brought in and they need the final print.
I know their going to look for glitches in my work but their not going to find any which makes its all the better. By tomorrow night I will be 50 million dollars richer and have something to talk about at the water cooler.
~
It's the first time I put on my cat suit after a week of deskwork. It's like a second skin and the fact that I look good in it too only enhances my life at night. I leave Isis a cup of milk before I leave and grab my whip. Somehow I have a weird feeling that I'm going to encounter someone. Oh well at least I'll get to see if he has a little woman at home.
~
It feels good to be out again. I like the air. Cats need to be free, to roam, to enjoy life and the excitement that it holds. And I'm no exception. Mark, Jay, and those other guys are like animals in cages that never see the light of day. They feel happy in their little existence. However shallow and dull it might be. I feel a little sorry for them. A little, I say.... not a lot.
I leap towards a building and find myself standing on the Layhart museum. Perfectly matching my details. I'm ecstatic. I almost feel sorry for taking advantage of it but then my mind wanders to the newly placed diamonds that lie in it and the feeling goes away. I go over to the door that leads from the bottom of the top floor to the museum's rooftop. I look at it for a while noticing that the security system wires are placed where I wanted them to be.
In the air-conditioning system.
No thief could possibly distinguish which wires control the temp and which ones the security system. Their about 50 wires for the air conditioning system and as soon as one of them is cut the police are already notified along with 5 other backup security systems that wouldn't let a mouse out of a corner much less a thief.
I smile, thinking how I could probably be the next Bruce Wayne. I leave to go towards the window. It's the only possible way to get into the museum. Its leads down to 30 beams that are placed so precisely that only three can be seen at one time.
Not a problem.
I grab my glasscutters and press it against the window when I hear a sudden flap...more like whoosh. Well it doesn't matter what it sounds like because somehow I already know what it is. I don't turn back. That would be like admitting that I was stealing. Which I was certainly not. I was simply testing myself. Nothing was taken. Not yet anyways.
"SELINA"
I cringe. His voice is always so hard. I stick the glasscutter under my costume as I slowly rise up showing as many as my curves as I possibly can. I saunter over to him and smile. Never forget the smile.
"Hey Handsome. What's a lonely knight like you with doing with a damsel like me." He sighs. It's the beginning of one of his why-the-hell-are-you-stealing speeches. I smile because I can already picture what he is saying in his mind.
"Stop this Selina. You are going to end up in Arkham permanently"...Blah...blah.... that's usually when I phase out and imagine how Bill deals with Hillary. I wait for him to make his speech but he just looks at me and crosses his arms. I can see his muscles flex with the maneuver. It's my turn to sigh. I would have preferred the speech.
"I wasn't stealing you know."
"NO."
"Can't believe a girl."
"Not when I find her crouching over a building with glass cutters in her hands."
I shrug. "Can't blame a girl for trying." I get a little closer to him and notice a chill go through his body. I always do that to him. I don't care if they say he has a million lovers. I know no one else can do that to him.
I put my arms over his neck and reach up to give him a kiss. He loosens up a little and I can feel his heart beating with mine. And then I smell the strangest thing.
Perfume. Calvin Klein for women. It's not my brand.
I shake my head...remembering who it is. I get a little closer and I can tell he is wondering what the hell I'm doing because his breathing becomes steadier. The fragrance becomes stronger too.
I think back to what Mark had said. Impossible, I say to myself.
I back away slowly from him while he perks up an eyebrow. I don't even look at him. I just wander aimlessly; I almost fall off the roof but recover and pull out my whip. I know he is staring dumbfounded at me but I don't care. Cats don't like to be used.
….to be continued.