Disclaimer: Don't own them, Never had, Never will.
She sighed. Already this wasn't looking good. "Remy". She smiled hopefully, but fought off tears when all he did was turn his head away. "I've missed you." Bad move. If she had missed him, why had she chased him out? Deciding on the direct approach, she lay an ungloved hand on his.
"Sure you did Chere. I'm sure all of you missed Gambit" He muttered and sighed, running his thumb over her fingers absently. "What's this?" Holding up his own hand, clasping hers. "Why can you touch?"
Rogue put on a brave face and turned his head to face her. "I had a device put in me. I can control my powers at will now." It could have been her imagination, but she was sure she saw his face tighten a bit.
"Why, Chere? Told you that I was jus' saving that femme. Told you that I loved you!" By this time he was gripping her hand painfully, but, like the picture, she felt that if he let her hand go then sooner or later it would be over. Forever.
Letting her hand go, he began to pace, hands in his pockets. "You killed Gambit Chere. You sent him running with nothin. Not even you." At this, Rogue's throat tightened. She was such an idiot. She had thought she was over grieving about her mistake. She had no right to stop grieving.
"Look, Remy, I'm sorry. Real sorry. I know that doesn't mean much at all. But every day since I found out… every day I have wanted to say that. Even that's not enough. I know that. But is this?" Taking a hesitant step forward, Rogue's trembling hand pulled his head towards hers until their lips brushed.
Pulling away, Gambit's eyes closed painfully. "Au revoir mon ami." Turning his back on her, he took a step away.
No. This wasn't the way it was going to happen. She wasn't going to let him go. She couldn't. "Remy!" she hissed at him. "I told you to leave last time. Do you think I'm going to let you go this time?!?!" She smiled as he turned around, a little bit of his old grin back.
"Not really, but it was worth a try, non?"
***
All commotion stopped as the pair stepped into the room. Heck, they had had enough surprises in the last few weeks, why not ANOTHER long-lost X-Men? But before anyone could react, Wolverine's keen eyes had noticed that they weren't holding hands. Or touching at all. For all the world, they weren't even close friends. He didn't say anything, but glowered at the Cajun.
"Welcome back Remy" Storm's musical voice chimed in. "I am sorry I was unable to say goodbye before your first… departure." This will probably be the closest to an apology he'll ever get he thought, noticing the averted gaze of the other three who had chased him away. Logan, even. He chuckled silently at that. All powerful Wolverine. However, he suddenly felt the big man's gaze. Without even having to think he remembered. He was just saying a last goodbye. He ignored Logan.
"Me to." And there was the acceptance of the silent apology, and everyone instantly lit up. Jubilee flung herself into a hug with him, and he whirled her around.
"Was missing you petite" He muttered laughingly under his breath, while all the while she was grinning maniacally at Rogue. Her lips formed the words "You WERE waiting for him, weren't you" silently.
Rogue glowered and then grinned, putting on a happy façade, masking her hurt. Remy hadn't said anything about it, but she had a bad feeling that they were "just going to be friends."
Cyclops shook his hand, and Professor Xavier offered to speak to him later about his travels. Remy declined, saying that what he did during this time was his business, and their activities were their own, but he assured them he hadn't done anything they would be fighting against, and a quick look told Rogue that he hadn't done anything with anyone either.
After all formalities, they told him that his room was the same as he had left it, except that Jubilee had ventured in a couple of times to touch it with a dusting rag before scurrying out like a demon was hiding in the dust.
***
Remy toppled over onto his bed, staring at the ceiling. Anger at himself radiated through his body, a torrid rush of self-hate.
He had hurt her. After as much careful planning as he could handle that cold and lonely night watching her from the stone wall, he had let his emotions do the talking. He had turned his back on her. That was the last thing he had wanted to do.
Shrugging, he sighed. They weren't even on equal ground yet. A couple more cruel actions might put them on an even ground, be he doubted it. And he didn't want her to hurt like he had, so he let it slide.
Staring around his empty room, he tried to ignore the traitorous tear that fell slowly from his demon eye.
***
See the stone set in your eye, see the thorn twist in your side. I wait for you. Slight of hand and twist of fate, on a bed of nails he makes me wait, and I wait… without you.
With or without you.