I've been inspired. I've finally gotten Squire, and that's made me happy enough to finish this next chapter! It's pretty long, too. I have to warn you, it gets a little serious, but I have to tie the story in with its beginning somehow, don't I? Anyhow, I'm anticipating maybe 2 or 3 more chapters before this ends. I've finally got one planned out. Here's the Ordeal-Enjoy!
Gary and Jon led Alanna the sacred baths. As Alanna started to undress, Jon pulled Gary away form the bath.
"Come on, Gary, if you stay, she'll never finish the Ordeal." Gary silently agreed, but this didn't stop him from casting a few wistful glances toward Alanna as she yelped while splashing herself.
Alanna came out a few minutes later, dressed in her white robes that were needed for the Ordeal. Gary cleared his throat nervously and began reciting her in the Code of Chivalry, Jon helping here and there. Alanna really wasn't paying attention to either of them, being that she knew the Code from back to front. She was paying more attention to how Gary talked with his hands and his earnest face as he talked about something he loved.
When they finished, Alanna popped back up to attention. They escorted her to the temple where she would sit and meditate the night. Jon hugged her, and walked away, leaving Gary and Alanna alone to talk.
Gary looked at Alanna for a few seconds, then pulled her into a hug. "Good luck, sweetling. I know you'll do well." He sounded even more nervous than Alanna felt the first time she went through the Ordeal.
"Relax, Gary, you and Jon survived. I will too," she answered. Gary pulled away from her and gave her a quick kiss before walking away to join Jon. Alanna sat down and began her meditation.
I remember the last time I did this. It seems so long ago. I was so unsure back then…about Duke roger, about Jon, about George, about everything. It's amazing how many answers I have now. Duke Roger…well, I'm surprised I didn't see that from the start. I guess I'm due to go into his chambers in a few days, and find the incriminating evidence. Again. I could've contacted the Goddess awhile ago, and not have to break the Code again. But I'm too afraid. Because if I contact the Goddess, I have to make a decision. A big decision. I'm not ready for that yet. I love them both, in different times.
George…George was my friend from the beginning. He was the first person I told about my secret. I trust him with my life, and I know it's the same for him. George lets me be myself, I know that by now. He's still so charismatic and charming, and he can make me laugh. I love him, I know that, and that's what makes my decision so hard.
I love Gary too. Gary was my friend for a long time too. He was my first real friend at the Palace. I don't know how I would've gotten along without him those first few years. He made me laugh, he guided me. He accepted me even before Jon did. I wonder why I never saw it the first time around. I wouldn't have seen it this time either, if it weren't for that one decision I made. And thank the Goddess for that decision. Gary's a whole new side to me. Usually, I let the man take charge in the relationship, and I still do with George. But with Gary, it's like he's waiting for me to make the move. He's sexy, and I love his smile and his eyes. I just can't decide.
I wonder what the Goddess must be thinking right now. I know she's watching me through Faithful. I'll have to make a decision soon. I hope she doesn't pressurize me. This is too hard for me. The Ordeal will be easy compared to telling the Goddess who I want to spend the rest of my life. Especially since I know what to expect…
A priest shook Alanna out of her reverie. It was time to enter the Chamber.
Alanna took a deep breath to steel herself and walked in. The door closed behind her, leaving her in complete darkness. Alanna remembered this darkness, and sat still, waiting.
Suddenly she heard a noise to her right. She turned, catlike reflexes popping into action. She saw George, older, as she had left him to come back to her past.
"Alanna, where are you? I miss you, lass. Come back to me…I love you…"
Alanna resisted the urge to cry out, and bit her lip hard. This was not how things were supposed to be going. She looked at the now fading image of George, once again faced by her imminent decision.
"Sir Alanna?"
Alanna turned. She faced a girl who was a head taller than her. She looked up into her eyes; they were the eyes of a dreamer. Her brown hair was cropped short, and she had a few freckles across her face.
"Sir Alanna? Have you been avoiding me? You're my hero, I want to meet you, just to say hello…"
Alanna knew who it was immediately. Squire Keladry. Another decision she had made. By avoiding the palace, she was avoiding Keladry as well, denying the girl her dream. Surely Numair would convince the conservatives that Alanna wouldn't be magicking the girl if she went to the palace and talked to her for a matter of two seconds.
As Keladry faded away, another image took her place. This one she recognized instantly. Liam Ironarm. To think he would've been alive and functioning if she hadn't asked for his help with the Dominion Jewel. He wouldn't have accompanied her to Tortall, and been shot with an arrow. He might've been alive.
"No," she thought to herself, suppressing the urge to start crying. It wasn't her fault. Actions caused by decisions were so random and complex, it would take even the brightest scholar to figure them out.
"Lass!" Once again she heard George's voice. She pinched herself to keep her from responding to his call. She turned to face him, slowly. Standing next to him was Gary, Gary in the past, young and lively. Both had pleading looks on their faces. They cried out for her to love them, to be with each of them. She wanted to run toward both of them, but a barrier stopped her from doing so. Unlike the barrier she had felt so long ago, the first time she had gone through this, it was invisible.
"My daughter," cried a powerful voice.
Like it always did, the unreal, beautiful voice brought Alanna down to her knees. She looked up into the inhumanly pretty face, answering with her eyes.
"My daughter, I have been waiting. Why have you not come to me yet?"
Alanna kept silent. She couldn't answer.
"I hope you have seen the point of me sending you back to your past. You shouldn't be bored with your life. It is not worthless. The simple, everyday decisions you make affect people in many different ways. Live your life to the fullest, and be happy with everything you have. Many women would die for what you have."
Alanna stared back, taking in every word. The Goddess had a point, and she knew it.
"My daughter, I am not forcing you to make a decision on this matter now. But I must warn you; events have a way of happening, when they are not met with. Your time in the Chamber is over, hopefully for the rest of your life. Before the end of the year is out, you will be back in the future. Goodbye, my daughter…"
As the Goddess disappeared, Alanna felt a weight sliding down across her body. The Chamber door opened, and light spilled into the room. Alanna walked as best she could to get out of the room.
Gary rushed over to her, and supported her. She was vaguely aware of being carried up to her room.
As her eyes closed, she thought to herself, "Events have a way of happening by themselves…"
What'd I tell you about the whole getting serious thing? And it's probably going to get worse before it gets better. Please don't abandon my fic, though! It's my first real one, remember, and I want to continue writing! Thanks for reading!
Luv,
Su