Disclaimer: I now own Who Wants To Be A Millionaire and I will take over next season. Yeah right.
Okay, due to popular demand, Gizelle is...not coming back for a while. Unfortunately, Arrow and Gary won't get a hotel room with a single bed, so we're stuck with them in the Control Room for a while. Oh well, maybe they'll provide some humor to this rapidly ending fic. Enjoy. Oh, Arrow, after this chapter, you'll either love me or hate me. (Here's a tip, start polishing your baseball bat.)
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LISTER: We have a...tie? Between Todd and Tracy. Well, no duh, they're the only ones here. Gizelle was blown out and Brock was probably arrested again. So let's break it. We have a bit of a change here for the tiebreaker. Each of you will be asked alternating two-answer questions. If one of you gets it wrong, the other comes up. Okay. We'll start with Todd. Arrow, a little help with these questions would be...um...helpful.
ARROW's voice: Uh, can't help now. Gary's fly is caught and I'm helping him.
LISTER: (Getting a smirk on his face) Isn't that what you would want to happen?
ARROW's voice: You think I'm trying to get it up? It's caught up and I'm trying to get it down.
RICHIE's voice: (From offstage) Too much info!!!!!!!!!
LISTER: Moving on. Todd. True or False? Misty caught a Totodile with the lure that looks like her.
TODD: Um, true?
LISTER: Nope. It spit it out. Tracy. Where did Deliah find Brock? In an open field or on her bed? Arrow!
ARROW's voice: I took a break. So what?
TRACY: In the open field.
VOICE: (From off-stage) Unfortunately, that's right. She kept trampling me with her Mr. Mime.
(Brock steps out of the shadows. He hits a button on a remote and pink gas comes from the vents. Suddenly, all the females in the audience are chanting)
FEMALE AUDIENCE: Brock. Brock. Brock. Brock. Brock. Brock. Brock. Brock.
FEMALE ONE: He's so hot. (She faints)
ARROW's voice: What's with them?
BROCK: Secret love potion makes all women exposed fall instantly in love with ME!
ARROW's voice: Then why am I not affected?
LISTER: (Slyly) Didn't you hear? He said all females. That rules you out. (BTW: Thanks for the tip, Arrow.) Um, I think Tracy's up now in the Hot-Seat. Come on Tracy.
(Loud boo-ing sound from audience)
LISTER: Maybe Brock should be next.
(Loud applause coming from audience)
BROCK: Well, if you insist.
(They go to their seats yet again)
LISTER: Let's cut the chitchat and get on with the questions. First one. How many battles have Ash and Misty completed? A. None, B. 1, C. 2, D. 3.
BROCK: Um, I count 2. C. One for Togepi and one for Totodile.
LISTER: So do I. It's right. For two hundred. What Nidoran is pink? A. Female, B. Male, C. Creepy, D. Cooked.
BROCK: Mmmm. Cooked Nidoran. Delicious and nutritious. (Snaps out of it) Oh. It may be strange, but it's B. Male.
LISTER: Weird, but true. For three hundred. What level does Dragonite evolve into Dragonair? A. Level 10, B. Level 20, C. It doesn't, D. Level 30.
BROCK: Arrow must have done this one because it's a trick. Dragonite evolves FROM Dragonaire. So, the answer is C.
ARROW's voice: Damn. Saw right through it.
LISTER: Nice try Arrow, but nothing is stopping Brock. For five hundred. How many times does Duplica appear in the Japanese version of Pokémon? A. 1, B. 7, C. 3, D. Isn't she the star?
BROCK: I know this. I follow these other versions well. It's C.
LISTER: Youfollow things well. That's right!
BROCK: It is?
LISTER: Going for a mile-stone. Right before Ash released Pidgeot, what Pokémon did they fight? A. Articuno, B. Fearow, C. Another Pidgeot, D. Noctowl.
BROCK: (Fighting back tears) That was so touching how he left Pigeot for the rest of the Pokémon. (Notices no one's crying) Anyway, it was a Fearow. B.
LISTER: Touching moment, no. Right answer, yes. You're going home with at least a thousand dollars. (Females in audience uproars) And a thousand girls' phone numbers, too. (Whispers) Hey, when you get them, can I bum a few off you?
BROCK: (In a loud whisper) No way.
LISTER: (Talking normally) Can't blame a guy for trying.
ARROW's voice: I heard what you said.
LISTER: Let's go on to the next questions. For two grand. How many times had Gary dropped his pants in front of Arrow during this show? Gee I wonder who fiddled with this question. A. 5, B. 10, C. 15, D. Not enough.
BROCK: D. I'm not gonna risk it with Arrow's demented mind.
LISTER: Arrow has a mind? Anyway, you're answer's right, according to Arrow.
ARROW's voice: Hey!
LISTER: Took you long enough. For four thousand dollars and about the same number of days with dates.
BROCK: You mean the number of re-applications of the love gas.
LISTER: Whatever. Hey, can I get some of that gas?
BROCK: In your dreams? Maybe. In real life? Not a chance, Regis-boy.
LISTER: Oh well. Anyway. How many times has Gary flashed his...ARROW! Try to keep this from going NC-17, will ya? Next question!
ARROW's voice: The answer was not enough for those of you wondering.
BROCK: Poor you.
LISTER: What do you mean?
BROCK: You're her friend and you have to put up with her a lot.
LISTER: Actually, poor Gary. He's the one locked in the control room with her.
BROCK: Good point. Well made.
LISTER: (Holding his hand to his ear) The judges have said to let you have the points because, well, it was pretty obvious why. So, for eight thousand. When Team Rocket tried to take the flame of Moltres before the Pokémon league, what did their robot resemble? A. A legged Metapod, B. A Charmander, C. A Meowth, D. A Snorlax.
BROCK: Those idiots will try everything. The answer is A. And a freaky one it was at that.
LISTER: Amen. You're going for sixteen thousand. What does an Eevee evolve into at night if you train it well? A. Jolteon, B. Umbreon, C. Espeon, D. Flareon.
BROCK: Ouch. Um, Fifty-Fifty.
LISTER: Okay, computer, take away two of the wrong answers. (A and D disappear) You're left with Umbreon and Espeon.
BROCK: Well, that did a lot of help. I'll ask the audience.
LISTER: Okay, female audience members might be too distracted. Oh well, audience, vote. (Waits)(It comes up 50% for each) Well, you're in a pickle now.
BROCK: What?
GUY IN AUDIENCE: You stole all of our girlfriends! We came together and decided to have you waste a Life-Line.
BROCK: Why me? I'll just guess and say Espeon because that sounds like a nighttime name. Don't ask if I want to stay with that. My mind's made up.
LISTER: Okay. It does sound like a nighttime name, but it's the wrong answer. Get out of here. Oh, the gas wore off, I think.
BROCK: Why do you say that?
LISTER: The girls are making out with their boyfriends. Take your check for one thousand dollars and get out of here.
(Brock leaves and sees a Nurse Joy. He knew this Nurse Joy was really superstitious and threw a penny in front of her.)
NURSE JOY: (Bending down to get the penny) OOH! A penny!
BROCK: (Looking at Nurse Joy's skirt that's a little too high up) Oh, JOY. They're so hot, but can sometimes be so stupid.
LISTER: (In his spot onstage) Okay. Todd, Tracy, here's the last Fastest-Finger question of the game, unless something else happens. Put these Pokémon in the order Ash caught them, starting with the earliest. Bulbasaur, Primape, Squirtle, Charmander. (Waits) Okay, here's the answers in the right order. Charmander, Squirtle, Bulbasaur, Primape. Who got it right in the fastest time? It's...
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Okay. Almost done with the story. What did you think. I can't take all the credit for this chapter. Arrow helped me with some questions and some sidelines stuff. Thanks, Arrow. Anyway, review.
Okay, due to popular demand, Gizelle is...not coming back for a while. Unfortunately, Arrow and Gary won't get a hotel room with a single bed, so we're stuck with them in the Control Room for a while. Oh well, maybe they'll provide some humor to this rapidly ending fic. Enjoy. Oh, Arrow, after this chapter, you'll either love me or hate me. (Here's a tip, start polishing your baseball bat.)
$?$?$?$?$?$?$?$?$?$?$?$?$?$?$?$?$?$?
LISTER: We have a...tie? Between Todd and Tracy. Well, no duh, they're the only ones here. Gizelle was blown out and Brock was probably arrested again. So let's break it. We have a bit of a change here for the tiebreaker. Each of you will be asked alternating two-answer questions. If one of you gets it wrong, the other comes up. Okay. We'll start with Todd. Arrow, a little help with these questions would be...um...helpful.
ARROW's voice: Uh, can't help now. Gary's fly is caught and I'm helping him.
LISTER: (Getting a smirk on his face) Isn't that what you would want to happen?
ARROW's voice: You think I'm trying to get it up? It's caught up and I'm trying to get it down.
RICHIE's voice: (From offstage) Too much info!!!!!!!!!
LISTER: Moving on. Todd. True or False? Misty caught a Totodile with the lure that looks like her.
TODD: Um, true?
LISTER: Nope. It spit it out. Tracy. Where did Deliah find Brock? In an open field or on her bed? Arrow!
ARROW's voice: I took a break. So what?
TRACY: In the open field.
VOICE: (From off-stage) Unfortunately, that's right. She kept trampling me with her Mr. Mime.
(Brock steps out of the shadows. He hits a button on a remote and pink gas comes from the vents. Suddenly, all the females in the audience are chanting)
FEMALE AUDIENCE: Brock. Brock. Brock. Brock. Brock. Brock. Brock. Brock.
FEMALE ONE: He's so hot. (She faints)
ARROW's voice: What's with them?
BROCK: Secret love potion makes all women exposed fall instantly in love with ME!
ARROW's voice: Then why am I not affected?
LISTER: (Slyly) Didn't you hear? He said all females. That rules you out. (BTW: Thanks for the tip, Arrow.) Um, I think Tracy's up now in the Hot-Seat. Come on Tracy.
(Loud boo-ing sound from audience)
LISTER: Maybe Brock should be next.
(Loud applause coming from audience)
BROCK: Well, if you insist.
(They go to their seats yet again)
LISTER: Let's cut the chitchat and get on with the questions. First one. How many battles have Ash and Misty completed? A. None, B. 1, C. 2, D. 3.
BROCK: Um, I count 2. C. One for Togepi and one for Totodile.
LISTER: So do I. It's right. For two hundred. What Nidoran is pink? A. Female, B. Male, C. Creepy, D. Cooked.
BROCK: Mmmm. Cooked Nidoran. Delicious and nutritious. (Snaps out of it) Oh. It may be strange, but it's B. Male.
LISTER: Weird, but true. For three hundred. What level does Dragonite evolve into Dragonair? A. Level 10, B. Level 20, C. It doesn't, D. Level 30.
BROCK: Arrow must have done this one because it's a trick. Dragonite evolves FROM Dragonaire. So, the answer is C.
ARROW's voice: Damn. Saw right through it.
LISTER: Nice try Arrow, but nothing is stopping Brock. For five hundred. How many times does Duplica appear in the Japanese version of Pokémon? A. 1, B. 7, C. 3, D. Isn't she the star?
BROCK: I know this. I follow these other versions well. It's C.
LISTER: Youfollow things well. That's right!
BROCK: It is?
LISTER: Going for a mile-stone. Right before Ash released Pidgeot, what Pokémon did they fight? A. Articuno, B. Fearow, C. Another Pidgeot, D. Noctowl.
BROCK: (Fighting back tears) That was so touching how he left Pigeot for the rest of the Pokémon. (Notices no one's crying) Anyway, it was a Fearow. B.
LISTER: Touching moment, no. Right answer, yes. You're going home with at least a thousand dollars. (Females in audience uproars) And a thousand girls' phone numbers, too. (Whispers) Hey, when you get them, can I bum a few off you?
BROCK: (In a loud whisper) No way.
LISTER: (Talking normally) Can't blame a guy for trying.
ARROW's voice: I heard what you said.
LISTER: Let's go on to the next questions. For two grand. How many times had Gary dropped his pants in front of Arrow during this show? Gee I wonder who fiddled with this question. A. 5, B. 10, C. 15, D. Not enough.
BROCK: D. I'm not gonna risk it with Arrow's demented mind.
LISTER: Arrow has a mind? Anyway, you're answer's right, according to Arrow.
ARROW's voice: Hey!
LISTER: Took you long enough. For four thousand dollars and about the same number of days with dates.
BROCK: You mean the number of re-applications of the love gas.
LISTER: Whatever. Hey, can I get some of that gas?
BROCK: In your dreams? Maybe. In real life? Not a chance, Regis-boy.
LISTER: Oh well. Anyway. How many times has Gary flashed his...ARROW! Try to keep this from going NC-17, will ya? Next question!
ARROW's voice: The answer was not enough for those of you wondering.
BROCK: Poor you.
LISTER: What do you mean?
BROCK: You're her friend and you have to put up with her a lot.
LISTER: Actually, poor Gary. He's the one locked in the control room with her.
BROCK: Good point. Well made.
LISTER: (Holding his hand to his ear) The judges have said to let you have the points because, well, it was pretty obvious why. So, for eight thousand. When Team Rocket tried to take the flame of Moltres before the Pokémon league, what did their robot resemble? A. A legged Metapod, B. A Charmander, C. A Meowth, D. A Snorlax.
BROCK: Those idiots will try everything. The answer is A. And a freaky one it was at that.
LISTER: Amen. You're going for sixteen thousand. What does an Eevee evolve into at night if you train it well? A. Jolteon, B. Umbreon, C. Espeon, D. Flareon.
BROCK: Ouch. Um, Fifty-Fifty.
LISTER: Okay, computer, take away two of the wrong answers. (A and D disappear) You're left with Umbreon and Espeon.
BROCK: Well, that did a lot of help. I'll ask the audience.
LISTER: Okay, female audience members might be too distracted. Oh well, audience, vote. (Waits)(It comes up 50% for each) Well, you're in a pickle now.
BROCK: What?
GUY IN AUDIENCE: You stole all of our girlfriends! We came together and decided to have you waste a Life-Line.
BROCK: Why me? I'll just guess and say Espeon because that sounds like a nighttime name. Don't ask if I want to stay with that. My mind's made up.
LISTER: Okay. It does sound like a nighttime name, but it's the wrong answer. Get out of here. Oh, the gas wore off, I think.
BROCK: Why do you say that?
LISTER: The girls are making out with their boyfriends. Take your check for one thousand dollars and get out of here.
(Brock leaves and sees a Nurse Joy. He knew this Nurse Joy was really superstitious and threw a penny in front of her.)
NURSE JOY: (Bending down to get the penny) OOH! A penny!
BROCK: (Looking at Nurse Joy's skirt that's a little too high up) Oh, JOY. They're so hot, but can sometimes be so stupid.
LISTER: (In his spot onstage) Okay. Todd, Tracy, here's the last Fastest-Finger question of the game, unless something else happens. Put these Pokémon in the order Ash caught them, starting with the earliest. Bulbasaur, Primape, Squirtle, Charmander. (Waits) Okay, here's the answers in the right order. Charmander, Squirtle, Bulbasaur, Primape. Who got it right in the fastest time? It's...
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Okay. Almost done with the story. What did you think. I can't take all the credit for this chapter. Arrow helped me with some questions and some sidelines stuff. Thanks, Arrow. Anyway, review.