The Perfect Christmas Gifts
By: Priscilla Violet Regina, the GW fic writer you all know and love! ~.ó
Disclaimer: Wouldn't it be awesome if I owned the Barbie with the Karate Gi? That would be so cool! But, I don't...or the pilots and/or other people (and I use that term loosely) mentioned in the this Lil ficcy of mine...Hey it's a fic-chan!
Warning: NO YAOI/SHONEN AI/SLASH WHATSOEVER! (Is that a warning? ~.ó) Go Jen-chan! Those types of plots have been working their way more and more into my stories...I swear...it's an epidemic! But that's okay...I've been told I write Yaoi well...But now I'm babbling and probably losing your interest to read my story...and that's not good! NO!! DON'T GO!!! Read on, noble...reader...^_^;;
Oh, also...Heero is a bit...OOC...at least in my eyes. I could have portrayed him better, but...in this he has a dry sense of humor that I enjoy...hehe ~.ó
Part 1
Mission status: Accepted, beginning
Christmas was tomorrow. Heero still hadn't bought anything. Grabbing his coat and keys, he headed out to his Jeep, deciding to buy Christmas presents. For the first time.
You heard right. Heero had never bout Christmas presents once in his life. He had never felt the need to. Most of the time, Christmas came and went without so much as a single reminder for him.
But now, he had a reason. Quatre was having a party tomorrow. Everyone would be there. Even Relena. He had heard Miliardo was going to make a cameo; he had gone into hiding since Mariemaia. Once again.
And, after watching "It's a Wonder Life," "The Christmas Story,' and "The Night Before Christmas" on a family channel, he was informed of the fact that people gave gifts to the ones they loved on Christmas.
So, he decided to comply.
There was just one problem.
He didn't know what to buy.
He knew Relena would probably love anything he bought her, seeing as how she took his vicious threats and Omae o Korosu's as exclamations of love, so he decided not to worry about her give right now.
Arriving at an all night strip mall, he parked his car and moved out into the artificial snow the Colony weather people had created for the season.
Stepping into the fluorescently lit store, Heero blinking, drinking all of its contents in and analyzing the layout of the store. He started down row one; perfumes and beauty products. 'Relena smells and looks fine. Duo, however...' Smiling at the mental image of Duo done in drag Queen, Heero continued down to row 2; camping equipment. 'They put the perfume and cosmetics next to the camping equipment? How inefficient.'
Annoyed, he skipped up a couple rows and saw a pink hairbrush. An eyebrow rose. Then, the other. Next to it was a box of pink barrettes and rubber bands. Evil smirk tugging viciously at the Japanese boy's lips, he grabbed these items and placed them in a basket. Heading further down the row, Heero saw a Barbie doll with a Karate Gi on. Tossing it in the basket, he smiled. 'I have Duo and Wufei taken care of!'
Still searching, Heero tried to think of the best gift for Trowa. Eyebrows knitting in thought, his eyes scanned the shelves, hoping for an idea. And he found his inspiration quickly. Seizing a megaphone, he checked all the features that came with it. Holding back a laugh, Heero continued, thinking of Quatre.
Sighing, he scowled. Quatre. What the hell could he buy Quatre?
A thought hit him. He bought Wufei a Barbie, so why not buy Quatre a...
GI-JOE!
Smirking at the idea of Quatre playing with a GI-JOE, he couldn't resist. Throwing it on top of the other gag gifts, he went to look for a present for Miliardo.
"Ugh. I'm buying a Christmas present for Zechs."
Completely stumped, he searched endlessly up and down the rows, not finding anything. "I'm definitely not the Perfect Gift-giver..." he muttered, almost ready to give up. Then, he reached the video tape section. Spotting a few Yoga taps, an idea flitted across the depths of his twisted mind. "Be One With Yourself, ne? Perfect."
Now, on to Relena.
Heero sighed. The girl had won his heart, what else did she want? A paradox. He was even more stumped than when he was deciding on her brother. 'And I thought she was going to be easy...'
Passing a ring maker, Heero paused. A ring? Walking up to the man, he stared down, Prussian blue eyes scanning and analyzing his every feature. "How much?"
"Depends on the ring."
"Do you engrave?"
"Sure, for extra." Looking over the jewelry, Heero's eye was caught by a simple gold band with a single diamond set in the center. Asking the man if he could see it, he looked a the size, seeing it was correct.
"Perfect." he muttered under his breath, turning it over and analyzing it in the light. "I want this one. Carve on the inside--"
"Whoa, are you sure you can pay for this, kid?"
The Japanese boy glared at the seller, eyes narrowing to dangerous slits. "Of course. Now, on the inside, I want you to carve this: Omae O Korosu. I'll write it down for you."
The man frowned. "What's this gibberish?"
'This guy continually reminds me of the reason I hate Americans...'
"It is Japanese. It says, 'I will kill you.' Now carve, please!"
"Alright, whatever, I'll be done in a few."
After having bought his other gifts plus some wrapping paper and bows, Heero returned to the man, glaring at him until he noticed his presence. Dropping his sandwich, the man hastily said, "It comes to $1,693.57. How will you be paying?" while placing the finished ring in a black case.
"Let me see the ring first."
The ring seller frowned. "You know, if you were my son I'd never let you talk like that. You should show some respect for your elders and betters..."
Heero looked straight into the man's eyes. "If I had respect for you or thought of you were better than me, I wouldn't talk like this. But, then again, I don't. Gomen." he said lightly, taking the ring case from the shocked man. Making sure the inscription was correct, Heero paid the man and headed home.
Part 2
Mission status: Complete, waiting for signal
"I miss the snow on Earth. I'll have to go home next year for the Christmas and visit the old osen." Heero made a mental note.
When he arrived at his apartment, he started to write out the cards to go with each gift. First, he grabbed a cad for Duo. It had some nonsense about having a wonderful holiday, which Heero smirked at. Grabbing a pen, he started to write his message.
Duo...what can I say? You are very loud and normally obnoxious, but a good person to have bail me out of an Oz research facility. Even if I plunge to my almost death unconsciously. Anytime I've needed you, you've been there. Hope one day I can repay the favor. You have reminded me of what it's like to have a sense of humor. For that, Arigato...I think. Enjoy gift; I spent a lot of thought on it.
-Heero
Rereading his note, Heero scowled. 'Am I growing soft?' Reaching for another card, he decided to write out Trowa's.
Trowa...
'Trowa...what can I write in Trowa's? I barely know him...'
I know we didn't really talk, but...maybe this gift can help. Merry Christmas, or whatever.
-Heero
"Hn. That was simple enough...on to Quatre."
Quatre-sama:
How you became a Gundam Pilot, I'll never know. I thought we all had to be ruthless killing machines to succeed. But having you in the group evened us out. You also kept us together, but from killing each other. You were definitely the brains behind us. Have a
Heero smirked. "I am going soft..."
wonderful Christmas.
-Heero
Sighing, he looked at the bag on the table containing all of the gifts. 'Who do I have left? Oh, right...Wufei, Zechs, and Relena.' he grimaced at this thought knowing these to be the hardest. "Wufei doesn't need a card...he'll get the message easy enough...I should still write one, though...Kuso."
Once again arming himself...with a pen, Heero grabbed another card, opening it. All he wrote was this:
Fei-
Don't say Injustice when you open this gift. I might have to shoot you.
-Heero
Taking sip from the vodka tumbler he had nearby, Heero cleared his throat, dreading the last two cards.
Zechs-
Maybe this will help you with your problem...
To mask, or not to mask.
That is the question.
-Heero
Chuckling at his sarcasm, the Japanese boy grabbed the last card. "Relena..." Rolling his eyes, he rubbed his temples, clearing his head. Why did he buy her a ring? Did he actually want to...
Hastily writing her card out, he wrapped each gift carefully and attached the notes with ribbon, sighing.
"Finally it's done."
Heading to bed, he fell asleep, dreaming of the possible outcome the next day would bring.