"I Wonder…"
Chapter 1/1
Joliefan4life@hotmail.com
Spoilers: Season 6
Disclaimer: Sorry, I don't own 'em
I wonder if he noticed when I snuck those glances at him. I wonder if he picked up on the way I would perk up as soon
as he entered. Did he realize he was my world? I wonder. Did he know that the times I spent with him were the most
fulfilling of my life? Could he see it in my eyes?
Why? Why couldn't I stay a little longer to tell him? Why did I have to leave? It isn't fair. All I needed was time. I
needed time to think things through. I needed time to put my thoughts into words. But someone interfered and now I
can't. I have to wait now. It isn't fair. Why did he have to do this? Why did he take me away?
You know, I really thought we had a future. We had something special. If I just had time; it would've been fine. We
would live in Europe, where we would both practice medicine. We'd have the perfect marriage and perfect jobs and
perfect kids. Four. We'd have four perfect children. Julia, Alexis, Thomas and Benjamin.
Our kids would learn French and go to the best private schools. We'd have a great life together. Just our four kids and
us. Maybe even a dog and a cat.
But that was all taken away. By that…that bastard.
I know, I shouldn't blame him. He was sick. But he took me away. I can never go back. All I have now are the
memories and my thoughts. I still feel the pain sometimes.
The pain of the knife going into me. Over and over until I fell to the ground. I could feel the blood seeping out of my
body. I could feel it on my hand. Sticky and warm. I had never felt so real in my life. Funny isn't it? The day you die is
the day you feel most alive.
I could feel the warm breath of the people around me, screaming for more doctors. I could even feel the pain in John's
eyes. His eyes stayed glued to mine as he rasped out my name.
I remember when they thought I would make it. I thought I was going to make it too, but it seems that God and his
angels up here had other plans.
They say your life flashes before your eyes right before you die. I guess that is true. I don't quite remember my last few
moments. The most beautiful angel was calling to me. She said that I had to come with her and everything would be all
right. That I didn't have to fight anymore. She was going to take care of me.
She was true to her word. She took care of me as I cried in her arms telling her that it wasn't my time to go, that I had
to stay.
Now I all can do is wonder what would be. Would he return my love and would my dream come true? Did he every
really see me? Or was he just playing with my mind? I wonder…
I'll just have to wait until he joins me up here to know.
But for now, I'll just wonder…
Chapter 1/1
Joliefan4life@hotmail.com
Spoilers: Season 6
Disclaimer: Sorry, I don't own 'em
I wonder if he noticed when I snuck those glances at him. I wonder if he picked up on the way I would perk up as soon
as he entered. Did he realize he was my world? I wonder. Did he know that the times I spent with him were the most
fulfilling of my life? Could he see it in my eyes?
Why? Why couldn't I stay a little longer to tell him? Why did I have to leave? It isn't fair. All I needed was time. I
needed time to think things through. I needed time to put my thoughts into words. But someone interfered and now I
can't. I have to wait now. It isn't fair. Why did he have to do this? Why did he take me away?
You know, I really thought we had a future. We had something special. If I just had time; it would've been fine. We
would live in Europe, where we would both practice medicine. We'd have the perfect marriage and perfect jobs and
perfect kids. Four. We'd have four perfect children. Julia, Alexis, Thomas and Benjamin.
Our kids would learn French and go to the best private schools. We'd have a great life together. Just our four kids and
us. Maybe even a dog and a cat.
But that was all taken away. By that…that bastard.
I know, I shouldn't blame him. He was sick. But he took me away. I can never go back. All I have now are the
memories and my thoughts. I still feel the pain sometimes.
The pain of the knife going into me. Over and over until I fell to the ground. I could feel the blood seeping out of my
body. I could feel it on my hand. Sticky and warm. I had never felt so real in my life. Funny isn't it? The day you die is
the day you feel most alive.
I could feel the warm breath of the people around me, screaming for more doctors. I could even feel the pain in John's
eyes. His eyes stayed glued to mine as he rasped out my name.
I remember when they thought I would make it. I thought I was going to make it too, but it seems that God and his
angels up here had other plans.
They say your life flashes before your eyes right before you die. I guess that is true. I don't quite remember my last few
moments. The most beautiful angel was calling to me. She said that I had to come with her and everything would be all
right. That I didn't have to fight anymore. She was going to take care of me.
She was true to her word. She took care of me as I cried in her arms telling her that it wasn't my time to go, that I had
to stay.
Now I all can do is wonder what would be. Would he return my love and would my dream come true? Did he every
really see me? Or was he just playing with my mind? I wonder…
I'll just have to wait until he joins me up here to know.
But for now, I'll just wonder…