Disclaimers: If I
really did own Gundam Wing, I wouldn't be writing this fic.
A/N: I don't think
this is a very good fic, but I hope you enjoy it and review it. Arigato!
It was late at night and everybody was at Quatre's safe
house, er mansion. Duo was playing
games, Trowa was reading, and Quatre was watching Duo play games. Heero and Wufei were on a mission to destroy
something.
Duo: This is
boring. I beat this game gazillion
times already.
Quatre: [yawns]
Well there's nothing else to do.
Suddenly the doorbell rings. No one moves to get it.
It rings again.
Quatre: Fine, I'll
get it!
A deliveryman was outside with a package in his arm.
Deliveryman: Is
there a Quatre Raberba Winner in the house?
Quatre: That would
be me.
Deliveryman: Sign
here and here's your package.
Quatre signs the
clipboard and received his package.
Duo: What's in the
box?
Quatre: I
dunno. But it's from my sister.
Duo: [jokingly]
Which one?
Quatre: [chuckles
and opens up the box]
Duo: Well what is
it already?!
Quatre: [holds out
a garment that was light blue.] A pair
of jeans.
Duo: What's so
great about that?
Quatre: Duo, I have
never worn jeans in my lifetime!
Duo: Ooookaay. Well, try them on then!
Nobody noticed Trowa who had slipped out to his room to
get his camcorder. He comes out to find
Duo alone.
Trowa: ……. ..…?
Duo: Uh, I don't
speak Trowish, Trowa.
Trowa: …. …… -_-'
Quatre: [peeks head
around the corner and sighs] I don't think they look good on me.
Duo: [turns around
to see Quatre hiding behind the corner]
Trowa
immediately starts to record.
Trowa: …. ……..
'……..……'! …… …
Quatre: [blushes]
Are you really gonna do that?!
Trowa: …
Duo: You speak
Trowish? Creepy. What the hell did he say?!
Quatre: He said
that he would record it and send it out to those places where people look for a
date on videos. Like those love finding
thingies. [shudders]
Duo: [looks at
Trowa] Did he really say that?
Quatre: [nods]
Duo: Wouldn't hurt
to try.
Quatre: Duo!!!!
[steps out of the corner to strangle Duo]
Trowa: …… ……… ….!
Quatre: Eep! [hides
back in corner blushing] You're scaring
me Trowa…
Duo: What he say?
Quatre: He says
that I have a fine ass and if he was a girl, he would definitely….. uh, "do"
me.
Duo: E-eww!! …Ooookkaaaay…. Anyways, just try it for once.
What are the chances of you being wanted by millions of hot chicks? I mean I'm the hot guy and most favored in
the show.
Trowa: ……… …..
Duo: Whatever it
means, I resent that!
Trowa: ….., ……. ….!
Quatre: Fine, I'll
try. Just don't mention the part of me
being rich.
Trowa: …..!
Duo: Alright!
Few weeks later…
Heero: Have anyone
seen Quatre? I haven't seen him for a
while.
Wufei: Yeah. Even though he is weak and weak, it feels
weird without him here.
Duo: Awww. Does that mean you like weak things?
Wufei: No!! I mean it's his house and we're living in it
and he's not even around.
Duo: Whatever. Anyways, I think Quatre went off with his
"friends." Right Trowa?
Trowa: …
Duo: Trowa?
Trowa: …
Duo: Answer me
Trowa!
Trowa: ……!!!
Heero: Dammit Duo,
he said yes three times already!
Duo: [gasp] You
know Trowish too?
Heero and Trowa:
-_-'
Giggles and running could be heard toward the house. It sounds like a stampede. The door flings open and Quatre is panting,
locking the doors.
Quatre: Guys! Help me barricade the doors! And the windows and every single crack in
this house!! Now before these ladies
starts to strip me down!
Duo: Whoa!! Calm
down! Where were you the past few
days? And what happened?
Quatre: [glares at
Duo] It's all your fault! If you haven't mentioned that told me to try
it out I wouldn't be in this mess!!
Heero: Where were
you the past days?
Quatre: [holding
back the door] Hiding and running away
from these crazy girls.
Duo: Whoa!! Quatre is a studmaster!
Wufei: I think we
should help Quatre block all exits before the girls come pouring in and infest
this house.
Heero: There's a
reason why they call this a "safe house" Wufei.
Female voice:
QUUUUUUAAAATTTTTTRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!
WHERE ARE YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUU?
QUUUUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!! COME AND GET ME!!!!!!!
Heero: [pales] Holy
shit! We have to block all entrances
and cracks! Barricade all
openings! Install metal bars on all
windows NOW!!! [gets up from couch and pushes it to the door, helping Quatre]
Everybody started to push furniture to the all the doors
and Trowa used some of the throwing knives and kitchen knives as bars for the
windows. Duo planted bombs outside the
doors and windows, just in case they try to break in . Wufei got out his katana and starts raving
"INJUSTICE!!". Heero was closing the
curtains around the windows and Quatre was gathering candles, canned food,
water, anything for survival in the basement, which would be their "bomb
shelter."
It was all dark in the basement and something scuttled
by. "We want Quatre!" could be heard
outside.
Quatre: I never
thought it would end like this.
Duo: Yeah…. you
being the studmaster… taking my place…[sniffles]
Wufei: Shut up
Maxwell! Our lives are more important
than being a studmaster!
Quatre: All because
of these stupid pants! I should take
them off!
Trowa: …… !!! ………!
Quatre: Oh sorry,
Trowa.
Duo: What the hell
did he say?
Heero and Quatre:
He said, "Nani!!!! Not in here you're
not! I'm not going to see you butt
naked and I'm sure that no one wants to too!"
Duo: He said that?
Quatre: [nods] Well, then.
I don't understand him since it's so dark in here you can't even see –
Trowa: [turns on
the flash light, room goes a little bit brighter, everything is visible]
Quatre: Oh. Well if I make you guys uncomfortable, I
guess I should go change upstairs. [walks up the staircase] Uh, could someone go with me?
Heero, Wufei,
Trowa, and Duo: [falls down anime-style]
Duo: I'll go. I got you into this mess. [walks with Quatre]
Even out of the dark basement, it was dark because not a
single light crept through the door, windows, crack….
Duo: Hey
Trowa! Throw us a flashlight!
Trowa: …….!
Duo: Hurry u –
[klunk…plop. A big lump is on Duo's
head and the flashlight is the cause of that]
You could have at least told me!!
Quatre: He did.
Duo: -_-'
They quietly made their way to Quatre's bedroom jumping out of their skin
when they heard the women were cutting down the trees to ram it against the
door.
Duo:
[whistles] I guess they're that
desperate! Your ass must be wanted!
Quatre: Shut up and
help me find my pants!
BAM!!! BAM!! BAM!!
Duo: We better
hurry. I can't find them!
Quatre: I can't
find them either! What happened to
them? I had a closet full of them!!
Duo: Damn! Well, just wear…… your boxers? [holds out
green boxers.]
Quatre: Uh……..
Female voice: Come
on ladies!!! We have to get a way
in!! [rampages around the house]
Quatre: I don't
think that's a good idea……what about your pants?
Duo: What?! Hell no!
No one touches the God of Death's pants!!!!!
Quatre: Well then
what should I wear?
Duo: [thinks] I got
the perfect pants no girl will want to be near. Follow me! [marches off
to another room downstairs. Quatre
follows]
Outside…
Girl: Harder! Only a few more hits and this door is down!
[ramming down the door] On the count of
three!! One…..two……..thr - ! [door swings open and Quatre steps outside]
All girls:
[gasps] …. Q-Quatre?
Duo: That's right,
ladies! Quatre got a new pair of pants!
[points his hands to Quatre's new pants, which were…]
Girls: [screams and
runs fast so they could be away from those…]
Back to the
others…
Heero, Wufei, and Trowa peek through the cellar window
after they cleared it.
Wufei: Are those my….?!
[bolts out the basement] Winner!! Don't even wear my pants! INJUSTICE!!!!!!!!!!
Back to the others….
Quatre: [turns to see
Wufei waving a katana towards him] Hold it Wufei! This drove the ladies away and I'm sure that if I have to wear
those jeans again, they will be crawling back.
So do you want millions of "weak" onnas invading our house for
years? Think about it
Wufei: [lowers sword and
thinks] What about Duo's pants?
Duo: First of all, no one
touches my pants but me! Second, they
are black JEANS. [shows off his black jeans and butt]
Wufei: [cringes and
shudders] Okay…Trowa's?
Quatre: I think we all
know that Trowa wears nothing but jeans if you look closely, Wufei.
Wufei: Heero's?
Quatre and Duo: Spandex.
Wufei: Kisama!
Quatre: Besides, Wufei,
it's only until I buy some more pants.
Wufei: What happened to
them?
Duo: Mysteriously
disappeared….
Wufei: Then let's buy them
now!
Quatre: They have to be
imported from Saudi Arabia. Might take
a few days.
Wufei: -_-'
Duo: Let's go back to the house and clean things
up.
Wufei walks in the house first and leaves Duo and Quatre
outside alone.
Duo: Uh Quatre…there's
something that I was meaning to ask you, but I didn't get to ask you…
Quatre: Oh? What is it?
Duo: Er, how do I say
this? Why did those pants make your
butt like a girly butt?
Quatre: What??!!!!
Duo: No offense, but they
do..
Quatre: And you're staring
at it?
Duo: What? Nonononono!!! I'm not that kind of person!
I mean, or you sure they were sent for you? Hilde takes me shopping and they look like the type she'd buy.
Quatre: Hmmm…. Maybe you
are right. Let's check the box. [finds the box on the couch and shakes it
out. AS note falls out]
Duo: Read it.
Quatre: It says "Hi Little
brother!! This is Iria and I'm in New
York right now! On Earth too!!! Exciting ne? Anyways, I forgot Reina's [a/n: sister name I just made up]
address and I was hoping you'd deliver it too her. It's her favorite pants in the universe so make sure she gets
it. Ja ne!" [drops letter and stands
mouth open] I'm. Wearing.
Girl's. Pants. ?.
Duo: I guess so…
Quatre:
AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! [kicks off pants and runs out in
boxers]
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! [stops when girls smirks at
him] Oh crap. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! [runs
away from girls running after him]
Duo: -_-' I'm not part of this…..
~owari~
Review or flames…I know it
sucks
