Legal Crap: I don't own any of the G-boys (though I like to think I have stock in Duo...). They belong to their rightful owners (can we say leash laws?). I also do not own the title of this fanfic. I stole it from an episode of Wallace and Gromit (by far one of the best clay-mation cartoons), but I thought it fit. I don't own Step by Step or Double-stuff Oreos (but I do have a stash...) either. I do, however, own my thoughts, ideas, and anything else no one else has copyrighted so don't steal any of that stuff without asking. So please, enjoy the fic! ~ Cherubic Sasami
The Wrong Trousers
Act I: Double Stuff Oreos and Patrick Duffey*
It was a normal day at Winner mansion. (Well, normal on a G-boy's standards...) Wufei was cursing at nothing in particular, Quatre was reading, Trowa was watching Quatre read, and Duo and Heero were on the couch watching 'Step by Step' reruns.
Out of no where Duo pulled out a bag of double-stuff Oreos and began inhaling the creamy, white filling (why eat the cookie when the sugar's all in the middle?) He looked over at his as-much-fun-as-a-hermit-crab partner. "Hey Heero, want one?"
"I'm not allowed to have sugar..." Heero mumbled under his breath.
Duo laughed. "Why?"
"Relena thinks I'm hyperactive," Heero groaned, holding up a bottle of Ritalin.
'Now there's the medical mistake of the century,' Duo thought. Duo smiled mischievously. "Don't worry buddy, there's no sugar in Oreos!" Duo handed one to the Wing pilot. Heero inspected it, hoping to find some sort of poison that would free him from watching any more of Patrick Duffey's* wild antics. Upon eating it, Heero's eyes lit up. He grabbed the bag and began to inhale what cookies Duo had left.
"That'll get your motor going, neh?" Duo asked, grinning from ear to ear. Before Heero could reply, Duo grabbed him and dragged him upstairs.
"Damn it!" yelled Wufei. "It's bad enough they kept me up all last night, but tonight too? INJUSTICE! I'm going over to Treize's house." Wufei went out the front door, slamming it so hard, he broke the doorknob.
Quatre and Trowa were left alone. Quatre kept staring at his book (he hadn't turned a page in hours!) and Trowa kept staring at him. Quatre looked up at Trowa, seizing the opportunity to make conversation.
"Trowa, want to go do something?"
"..."
"I don't feel like cooking tonight, want to go out to eat?"
"..."
"Um, want to watch TV? I think Heero and Duo left some Double-Stuff Oreos on the couch..."
"..."
Quatre gave up. 'Nothing happening tonight, nothing happening any night...' He thought and went back to staring at the same page he'd been staring at for hours.
*~* The next morning... *~*
Heero woke up in Duo's bed, sore, with Duo underarm. His head still hurt from the crazed sugar-rush he'd gone through the night before. He pulled the mini-Deathsythe covers off and trudged over to the trunk where he kept some of his clothes. To his surprise, it was empty. Grabbing Duo's black-satin robe, he stumbled over to his own room. All he could find were some old sweat-socks that reeked of Wufei's BO. He growled and walked back to Duo's room. By this time, Duo was up and out of bed, brushing his meter-long hair.
"Where are my clothes?" Heero hissed.
"What do you mean?" Duo asked innocently.
"Where did all my clothes go?" Heero repeated, giving Duo a death glare.
"Hm..." Duo replied, rubbing his chin. "Oh yeah, you don't remember?"
"Remember what?"
"You threw them all out the window last night. You said you'd never need clothes again!"
Heero sweatdropped but continued to glare at Duo.
"Don't worry buddy! I've got plenty of clothes that we can share."
"There's no way in hell I'm going to be caught in your ugly collar and aviator pants."
"Do you have much of a choice?"
Heero grabbed the clothes from Duo. "I'll go out and buy some new clothes. In the mean time, these will suffice..."
"Great! We'll be like twins!"
Heero thought about this last statement. "No we won't. First of all, you're not coming with me. Second, you can not even leave this room till you hear the closing of the front door. Got it?"
Duo stuck out his lower lip. "Fine, but its not my fault you decided you wanted to be naked the rest of your life!"
Heero exited the room, slamming the door behind him. As he crept downstairs, he noticed he didn't hear the usual sounds of Wufei's cursing, Quatre's pleading him not to curse, and Trowa's silence. 'They must have all gone out,' Heero thought. 'Or maybe they're waiting for me to come downstairs to laugh at me.' He readied his gun, just incase.
When he got downstairs, it was pretty much as it had been last night (minus Wufei). Quatre was still staring at the same page, Trowa was staring at him, and Rashid was fixing the doorknob to the front door. Instead of bringing attention to himself by asking what happened, he decided he'd go out the back. 'Duo's pretty smart, he'll figure out to come out after a while...'
Up in Duo's room, Duo waited for the signal to come down. 'I hope he leaves soon, I really have to go to the bathroom...'
Will Duo ever be able to come down? Will Heero ever find some new clothes? Will Quatre ever turn the page? Find out on the next act of The Wrong Trousers. Act II: The Joys of Wearing the Collar.
*~*~*
*For those who don't know, Patrick Duffey played the father on Step by Step. I never really liked that show, but I always used to watch it so I could make fun of him. Makes sense, neh?
So what'd you think? This was the first fic I ever wrote (not posted, wrote). Please, review!
The Wrong Trousers
Act I: Double Stuff Oreos and Patrick Duffey*
It was a normal day at Winner mansion. (Well, normal on a G-boy's standards...) Wufei was cursing at nothing in particular, Quatre was reading, Trowa was watching Quatre read, and Duo and Heero were on the couch watching 'Step by Step' reruns.
Out of no where Duo pulled out a bag of double-stuff Oreos and began inhaling the creamy, white filling (why eat the cookie when the sugar's all in the middle?) He looked over at his as-much-fun-as-a-hermit-crab partner. "Hey Heero, want one?"
"I'm not allowed to have sugar..." Heero mumbled under his breath.
Duo laughed. "Why?"
"Relena thinks I'm hyperactive," Heero groaned, holding up a bottle of Ritalin.
'Now there's the medical mistake of the century,' Duo thought. Duo smiled mischievously. "Don't worry buddy, there's no sugar in Oreos!" Duo handed one to the Wing pilot. Heero inspected it, hoping to find some sort of poison that would free him from watching any more of Patrick Duffey's* wild antics. Upon eating it, Heero's eyes lit up. He grabbed the bag and began to inhale what cookies Duo had left.
"That'll get your motor going, neh?" Duo asked, grinning from ear to ear. Before Heero could reply, Duo grabbed him and dragged him upstairs.
"Damn it!" yelled Wufei. "It's bad enough they kept me up all last night, but tonight too? INJUSTICE! I'm going over to Treize's house." Wufei went out the front door, slamming it so hard, he broke the doorknob.
Quatre and Trowa were left alone. Quatre kept staring at his book (he hadn't turned a page in hours!) and Trowa kept staring at him. Quatre looked up at Trowa, seizing the opportunity to make conversation.
"Trowa, want to go do something?"
"..."
"I don't feel like cooking tonight, want to go out to eat?"
"..."
"Um, want to watch TV? I think Heero and Duo left some Double-Stuff Oreos on the couch..."
"..."
Quatre gave up. 'Nothing happening tonight, nothing happening any night...' He thought and went back to staring at the same page he'd been staring at for hours.
*~* The next morning... *~*
Heero woke up in Duo's bed, sore, with Duo underarm. His head still hurt from the crazed sugar-rush he'd gone through the night before. He pulled the mini-Deathsythe covers off and trudged over to the trunk where he kept some of his clothes. To his surprise, it was empty. Grabbing Duo's black-satin robe, he stumbled over to his own room. All he could find were some old sweat-socks that reeked of Wufei's BO. He growled and walked back to Duo's room. By this time, Duo was up and out of bed, brushing his meter-long hair.
"Where are my clothes?" Heero hissed.
"What do you mean?" Duo asked innocently.
"Where did all my clothes go?" Heero repeated, giving Duo a death glare.
"Hm..." Duo replied, rubbing his chin. "Oh yeah, you don't remember?"
"Remember what?"
"You threw them all out the window last night. You said you'd never need clothes again!"
Heero sweatdropped but continued to glare at Duo.
"Don't worry buddy! I've got plenty of clothes that we can share."
"There's no way in hell I'm going to be caught in your ugly collar and aviator pants."
"Do you have much of a choice?"
Heero grabbed the clothes from Duo. "I'll go out and buy some new clothes. In the mean time, these will suffice..."
"Great! We'll be like twins!"
Heero thought about this last statement. "No we won't. First of all, you're not coming with me. Second, you can not even leave this room till you hear the closing of the front door. Got it?"
Duo stuck out his lower lip. "Fine, but its not my fault you decided you wanted to be naked the rest of your life!"
Heero exited the room, slamming the door behind him. As he crept downstairs, he noticed he didn't hear the usual sounds of Wufei's cursing, Quatre's pleading him not to curse, and Trowa's silence. 'They must have all gone out,' Heero thought. 'Or maybe they're waiting for me to come downstairs to laugh at me.' He readied his gun, just incase.
When he got downstairs, it was pretty much as it had been last night (minus Wufei). Quatre was still staring at the same page, Trowa was staring at him, and Rashid was fixing the doorknob to the front door. Instead of bringing attention to himself by asking what happened, he decided he'd go out the back. 'Duo's pretty smart, he'll figure out to come out after a while...'
Up in Duo's room, Duo waited for the signal to come down. 'I hope he leaves soon, I really have to go to the bathroom...'
Will Duo ever be able to come down? Will Heero ever find some new clothes? Will Quatre ever turn the page? Find out on the next act of The Wrong Trousers. Act II: The Joys of Wearing the Collar.
*~*~*
*For those who don't know, Patrick Duffey played the father on Step by Step. I never really liked that show, but I always used to watch it so I could make fun of him. Makes sense, neh?
So what'd you think? This was the first fic I ever wrote (not posted, wrote). Please, review!