*********************************
"I-I-I" I faltered, failing to come up with an excuse.
Thankfully, Ron and Tara opened the door and obviously they'd been listening.
"So...are you guys friends again?" Ron asked, hopefully.
I looked angrily back at Ron.
"So you were trying to set me up! You thought me and Harry would get back together?!" I shouted.
"Yeah....What did you think it was?" Tara asked.
"Frankly, I don't know anymore. I really don't. " I said shaking my head.
"Are you friends?" Ron repeated.
"No! We'll never be!" I said irritated.
"At least you could say you're sorry, Harry!" Tara snapped at him.
"I don't have to apologize to anyone!" Harry said outraged.
"OOOH yes you do! And you're going to, bucko, otherwise you'll answer to Fist One and Fist Two!" Tara threatened. I had to hold onto the sleeve of her shirt to keep her from tackling Harry.
"Tara, don't waste your time." I said in a low voice.
"No, let's not. C'mon, Hermione. We have to go!" Tara said, grabbing my arm.
***********************
"I cannot believe that guy's ego! Geez, who's he think he is? The Queen of Sheeba?" Tara fumed.
"That would be KING of Sheeba." I corrected.
"Whatever." She said, turning a sharp corner.
"What did you like about him?" Tara asked after a few moments of silence.
I looked at her sideways from my view of the English countryside.
"Well?"
"I don't know!" I said, "I guess it was the way he always had something smart to say and didn't take any crap from anyone....and he always made me laugh the way he was stubborn when his mind was set." I said, counting off points.
Tara snorted quietly.
"You're so sappy, Hermione." She said, turning yet another corner.
"No I'm not!" I protested.
"You honestly think that for the slightest second Harry would have given you a second thought after all those other girls? You can DO BETTER!" Tara explained.
"But I don't want to do better! Harry is better! Wait...no. Harry is the best!" I exclaimed.
Tara snorted again, "No he's not! He's got more self obsession than Bruce Willis!"
There was some more silence and then Tara said, "You have to convince yourself you love him, Herm. We all know deep down he's hurting too."
"I know." I said softly.
"Do you?"
"I don't know! I think I do, but it's so hard to think back to days when the only girl in his life was me!" I cried.
"This could take a lot of work." Tara muttered.
***************************
When we arrived home, there was a message on our answering machine.
"Hey Hermione, it's Harry. Call me soon, we have to talk!" Was all it said.
"Harry Potter called you?!" Natalie said incrediously.
"I can't believe it myself!" I said in an undertone.
I dialed the number Lindsey had left by the phone and twisted my hands nervously.
"Hello?" Harry said into the reciever.
I hesitated to speak.
"HELLO?" He repeated.
I bit my lip.
"Hi." I said in a small voice.
"Hi."
I drew a deep shuddering breath.
"I can't believe I'm talking to you!" I joked.
"Yeah..it's kind of twisted to think after all this we haven't cursed each other." He replied.
I forced a high-pitched laugh.
"You ok?" Harry asked.
"Fine! Never better, actually!" I lied.
"Ok, look Herm. Let me tell you why I called you. First of all, Ron and I talked for a long time the past few nights about you. I realized what a jerk I've been to you and you don't deserve it. I'm....I'm sorry Hermione. For everything, I truely am." Harry said.
I was in complete shock for quite some time and then said in a calm voice, "I think I'd best be going. I accept your apology, however I don't see the point. I do not wish to talk or see you ever again. Good night, Harry."
"Wait, before you walk out again, I want to tell you that I've moved on and have a girlfriend. Please meet her?" Harry asked.
I sighed, "You're making this very difficult on my part. I specifically stated I don't wish to have a part of your life. But I will come if it makes you confident you can dare to bring another girl into your life."
"O...K. Yea...well anyway, her name is Carmen Ashmore and she's really nice. Meet us at that old diner place by Harods!"
And with a click, he hung up.
"ACK! WHY THE FUCK DO I DO THIS! HE DOESN'T EVEN CARE WHAT I THINK, HE DOES WHATEVER THE SHIT HE FEELS LIKE! WHY DO I KEEP DOING THIS TO MYSELF!?!" I cried aloud.
****************************