*ahem* Anyways. Some news. And a plug. SO -- did y'all know that the preview for SQUIRE is up on Tamora Pierce's website?? *jumps for joy* It's quite good .. TP quality, I must say! ^_* Also .. for the plugs .. I'd like to plug Melusine's fic A Girl of the Gardens [ beta-readers plug too much, we know! *grins* ] and Virgo's fic Toward Horizon, both based on the AOL TP fanclub which I can't join. *choked sob*
Also, I'd like to plug my own fledgling Yahoo! club, Pages and Squires. ^_^ OKAY .. I'm sorry, I'll shut up now and get to the good stuff.
The beginning
of the plan was about to be carried out -- the treaty had gone through,
the marriage date was set for my sixteenth birthday, and Roald, I could
tell, was ecstatic. He seemed to think that he had defeated me in
some way, and it was all I could do not to scream with rage as he skipped
around the palace -- well, almost -- and spoke of nothing but Prince Kamokuro. I did have supporters, though: Christan, as always, was beside me in everything,
and Kander was settling in nicely as my brother, even with his increase
in the workload. He was just about to become a second-year squire,
and his knightmaster was getting antsy about roaming. Thankfully,
most of the knights felt it was their duty to stay the scant weeks until
the wedding, and Kander informed me that he would be there if I needed
him.
With so much
happening, I should have been happy, but all I felt was guilty.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
For hours, maids
gathered around me, muttering, "Just hold still, Your Highness," or "Oops
.. sorry about the pin, Your Highness." They fitted me with so many
sparkling jewels and so many light, gauzy veils of fabric over my hair
and my eyes that I was about ready to scream by the time I was dressed. Little did I know that I was in for much worse -- sitting around in the
bridal chamber, with little ladies-in-waiting giggling all around me. I tried to shut out the sound of "Sir Aidan is sooo handsome!" or "Sarina's
dating a squire -- can you believe it?" but found it almost impossible.
To complicate
matters, I was shaking with fear and doubt and guilt. How can I MARRY
someone when I'm Christan's FIANCEE? That just doesn't WORK, I would
be thinking one second, and then I'd remember his words: "You do whatever
you have to do to be a knight and I will follow you more obediently than
a shadow." He didn't mind. Prince Kamokuro knew full well
I was lying, and he didn't mind at all, either.
So why did I
feel so terrible?
"Princess, it's
almost time," the old priest of Mithros whispered, poking his head in the
door. We were doing it in the temple of Mithros rather than with
the Goddess as a gesture towards the prince. I hoped the Goddess
wouldn't mind -- just another worry to add to the growing pile in my head. In response to the priest's announcement, the ladies in waiting all giggled,
kissed my cheeks, and left to sprinkle flowers on the floor and brighten
the chapel with their Gifts. It would have been nice of them, if
it wasn't just their required duty to the Crown of Tortall. I sighed. That was the problem with being royalty. Nobody in Court did anything
for you because you were you -- they did it so they could earn favor
with your parents.
I checked my
reflection in the window -- at least, that was what I intended to do, before
it opened. Lovely green eyes stared at me from under a hooded monk's
cloak.
"Christan!" I
gasped, pleased and surprised that he had managed to come, but a little
scared, both for him and of him -- what if he was angry?
"Did I make it
in time?" he asked, without looking at me, as he finished his climb.
"Just barely,"
I told him, mustering up a grin.
He straightened
himself out and came close enough to touch me without mussing my "perfect"
costume. "Goddess, you're beautiful," was all he said, lightly tracing
my cheekbones with his fingers.
"I wish it was
for you," I whispered, loving the feel of his hands. He smiled and
kissed me lightly, and I closed my eyes, cherishing the moment.
Shuffling footsteps
were heard in the outside corridor. I opened my eyes, startled, and
grasped his hand quickly in farewell. His eyes didn't leave mine. The footsteps were getting louder, closer. "Go quickly!" I hissed. With a last adoring look, he crawled out of the window in an instant and
was gone, sealing the elegant glass behind him. Only in Tortall's
finest temples did they actually have glass windows.
I spun around
as the priest entered -- if he suspected that my makeup was slightly disturbed,
he said nothing. I wondered if he was unobservant or tactful, and
nourished the hope that it wasn't that noticeable. "Come," he beckoned,
and I was led to the end of the chapel, where Roald was waiting on the
purple velvet pathway.
Roald said nothing
as I coldly fit my arm into his and the royal procession took its place
behind us. I thought of those gorgeous green eyes, and longed for
it to be over. It seemed to take forever to walk up the aisle, but
somehow I made it to the prince, and he, not giving away a thing, took
my arm gently as we kneeled before the priest.
That, by far,
was the hardest part of the ceremony; kneeling before the altar of Mithros
as the priest recited our vows. Christan's face swam in front of
me, and I tried to pretend he was next to me as I lied. It's the
only way, it's the only way, I repeated silently to myself, just waiting
for it to end.
Everything happened
very fast after the wedding. The prince's ship would leave just after
the seemingly endless ceremonies, which didn't give me much time. Thankfully, Gazali was waiting in the reception room for the two of us. Once the party died down somewhat, we'd go to another room and she'd speedily
change into Princess Andrea of Tortall. Once she'd gone back to the
party with Prince Kamokuro, I was to take everything I needed to become
Christan of Hiera and hide away in the Night Dragon Inn until it was time
for me to return to the palace and become a page.
Gazali and I
embraced briefly, but tearfully, causing her to daub more makeup until
it covered her sadness. "I'll see you soon," was all I could manage
to say, as Prince Kamokuro watched uncomfortably.
"Right," Gazali
replied. She gripped my shoulders. "Good luck."
And then she
was gone.
I didn't get to
the Night Dragon until very late in the day, since the wedding had taken
all morning and the party had taken up most of the afternoon. After
that ordeal, I was positive that I wanted to get married in the cellar
of the Night Dragon with about three guests. Goddess help me!
Christan hadn't
been at the wedding, but I didn't expect or want him to be there. The priest's solemn and forbidding tone, and my shaky "I do" had not done
much for my peace of mind. I felt extremely relieved to have the
chance to spend three days with Christan at the Night Dragon, even though
he had his duties as the Rogue. I'd simply practice putting my disguise
on quickly, and some basic combat skills, before I left for knighthood.
The King of Thieves
looked exhausted and worried when I crept into his room through a secret
passage. "Andrea," he greeted me softly, and hugged me after I'd
set all my bags on the floor. "I was just thinking about you," he
whispered as he held me tightly.
I blushed, though
he couldn't see it. "Praise Mithros that's over," I mumbled. "The next wedding I go to will be ours." His response was to break
our embrace and really kiss me, released from the worry about my
appearance afterwards. Light brown locks of hair tumbled down to
his eyes as we held each other for a long, long time.
He grinned loosely
when we pulled apart. "That did a lot for my mood, I can tell you."
I smiled back
at him, feeling much better myself. "Good. I'm glad. Now what was ruining your mood in the first place?"
Lowering his
eyes and sighing, he replied, "Five of my best thieves were arrested by
the Lord Provost, all at the same time, in the city today." I gasped. Christan trained his thieves well -- both men and women -- and in his entire
three-and-a-quarter-years reign, only one thief had been captured. That is, until this.
"That's impossible,"
I said without thinking, frowning and trying to figure it out. Had
they been betrayed? "Somebody must have told Lord --"
"Exactly," Christan
cut in, meeting my eyes with that "we-think-alike-and-I-love-you" gaze
I knew so well -- and that sent delighted shivers all through me. Only this time, it was grim.
"Do you have
any idea who?"
"Some .. it could
be any of the new rogues, it could be any of the people who work at the
inn .. that narrows it down to about thirty-three," he told me ruefully. I bit my lip and turned away. It was a scary thought that somebody
could be watching us right now. Who knew who was tipping off the
guards? It could be Christan's right-hand thief, for all I knew.
"But why spend
our time together worrying about this?" Christan announced, breaking the
silence. "We have three days together -- let's make the most of them."
"Good idea,"
I agreed, grinning.
He strode over
to take me into his arms. I kissed him, running my hands through
his hair, and he ran his hands down my back, sending a beautiful warmth
up my spine. It was a lovely, long moment; so long, in fact, that
it lasted until late at night. We whispered, and kissed, and forgot
all our earthly concerns to be with each other. After awhile, we
ran out of breath, and fell asleep in each other's arms.
The time passed
more quickly than I ever would have thought possible, and somehow I found
myself in front of Christan's mirror, disguised as -- well, him -- ready
to depart for the palace.
He came up behind
me and slipped his arms around my waist. "This is so strange," he
commented.
"Me being you? It definitely is. I never thought I'd look like this," I joked, trying
to bring some humor into the situation. I'd have to go soon, and
it would be harder to leave Christan now than any other time in the world. At least if we laughed, we might be able to hold the tears off,
I thought.
He chuckled softly. "Was that a compliment? I can't tell." I suddenly couldn't
laugh, though. I kept remembering how long it would be before I saw
him again, and my stomach knotted.
"I probably won't
get a day in the city until -- until Midwinter," I told him, putting into
words what I hated and feared most about knighthood.
"Which will make
the time we do have even sweeter, right?" he pointed out gently, stroking
my hair.
My heart wrenched. I would miss him too much. I couldn't do this. It was scary
.. I only probably only knew half of what the other new pages would, I'd
be found out for sure ..
Christan pulled
me into his arms and held me tightly. "Andrea, you're the fastest
learner I know. You've got a determination that amazes me -- well,
everything about you amazes me --" I smiled into his shirt. "-- and you're brave and you're smart and you're friendly and you're
going to do it, and I'm the proudest man in Tortall."
I hugged him
tightly. "I love you, Christan," I said fiercely.
"I love you more,"
he whispered, just as fiercely. I was wrong about keeping the tears
back .. this goodbye was the hardest I ever had to go through.
Still, though,
everything I'd planned for these three years was finally beginning. I was going to become a knight, and that knowledge kept me going through
the hardest of times.
"Welcome, Christan
of Hiera," the training master greeted me as I stepped into his office,
somewhat timidly. "That will be the only real welcome you'll get
from anybody here," he continued grimly, his blue eyes firm and unflinching. "It's hard here, I'm not keeping any secrets from you; we always have a
few pages who drop out every year. They go home, back to their fiefs,
and waste their parents' money, and stop swearing allegiance to the crown." I didn't know what to say, so I said nothing, but held his gaze squarely. Lord Saxen looked like the sort of man to be reckoned with -- I remembered
Page Kiara's words from my welcoming ball about his swordsmanship, and
my eyes strayed to the single sword that was strapped to his waist. His strong arms suggested that he could use it, and very well .. I sent
up a silent prayer to the Goddess, and wished I could be that good.
"You are here
for one purpose, and one purpose alone: to serve the crown of Tortall as
best you can. No disobedience will be permitted at all. If
you are pert, or if you fight, or if you taunt servants, you will be given
punishment duty and two more chances to redeem yourself. If you disobey
three times, you will be sent home. Do not think that you will not
be caught. You will.
"As a page, you
are required to serve at banquets for special occasions, and to run errands
for any lord, lady, duke, or duchess who asks. You will treat the
girls as equals, and no flirtation is permitted. Any questions?" The slight mockery in his tone almost dared me to ask something stupid
and test his patience; I didn't take the challenge.
"No, my lord,"
I replied obediently. First impressions counted.
"You come with
no escort," he remarked, clearly wanting me to explain this.
"My parents were
killed by spidrens, my lord," I told him.
There may have
been sympathy in his gaze, I noticed with some surprise. "Yes ..
some do still roam. Well, I trust you will accept your duty as a
knight." After a short silence, he added: "Have you brought a servant
with you?"
"No, my lord,"
I answered.
He nodded. "The headwoman, Lea Tallar, will come for you in a moment and lead you
to your rooms. Unpack quickly, because sponsors will be chosen soon." From what Kander had told me, I knew that sponsors were older pages who
showed the younger ones how to do things. I shivered. Who would
be mine?
Stepping out
of the room, I noticed a young woman with shoulder-length black hair and
piercing brown eyes waiting for me outside. "I am Lea Tallar, the
headwoman of the palace servants," she told me. "Servants tend your
fire, do your laundry, sweep, bring hot water for your bath, make your
bed, and mend clothes. They're not meant to help you with your weapons
and armor, mind. You take care of your own self."
I nodded.
"And if you think
to play tricks on a servant," she told me sternly, making sure I looked
into her eyes, "you'll be doing your own work for the rest of the year. We're not your parents. Understood?"
I nodded again,
and just for effect, I added, "Yes, I do."
She looked at
me out of the corner of her eyes, but said nothing more. Opening
my chalk-engraved door, she raised her eyebrows and added -- somewhat halfheartedly
-- "Have a good year."
I unpacked quickly
-- I hadn't brought much, too afraid that it would give me away -- and
just as I was finishing up, a loud bell toll sounded that I thought I remembered
hearing somewhere when I was venturing near the pages' wing before. It was odd to leave it as a princess after a wedding and enter it again
as a page with a burned-down fief.
Stepping outside,
I noticed five other new pages, one of them a girl. I looked her
over curiously; she had beautiful dark eyes and long, flowing hair. I wondered how she would deal with her hair while fighting .. I had mine
in a spell to look like a boy's, which was a useful invention of Gazali's. It was the little things like that that reminded me that she was so much
better at concealment and spywork than I would ever be. Well,
'course not, I told myself. You're here to fight.
I took a deep
breath and tried to grin as Lord Saxen entered the hall to look over the
six new pages. He was so tall, I noticed, seeing him standing
for the first time. I resisted the urge to shake my head in wonder
-- he was an extremely impressive person.
"Pages!" he boomed. Many other heads peeked out of their doors, and older pages began to appear
around the hall. Trying not to look too bewildered, but curious all
the same, I inspected every face. I wondered if I would have any
enemies here, and who exactly they would be.
"Samson of Meron,"
Lord Saxen began, gesturing to one of the new boys. He had fiery
red hair, and fiery red cheeks as well, I noticed, with a touch of amusement.
"I'll sponsor
him, my lord," volunteered an older boy I recognized as Evan of King's
Reach, one of the nicer pages I'd been dancing with at my ball two years
ago.
And so it went. The new girl was chosen by Page Lexana of Drell Valley, and I wished I
could have entered as myself and welcomed into the circle of girls as well. With a rueful inner sigh, I waited for my name to be called.
"Christan of
Hiera," announced Lord Saxen. There was a short silence, and then
a tall, relatively handsome boy called out: "I'll do it." I shot
a glance over at him; he didn't look like the nasty sort. He had
bright, friendly hazel eyes, and a quirky smile. I decided I liked
him.
"Done," finished
Saxen. "To supper."