Almost there...
~~~
I huddled against the cold wall, my mind running wild. He couldn't rape me. He couldn't rape me. He couldn't, he couldn't, he couldn't.
"Come on Ken," Oikawa cooed from the darkness, "I untied your hands for a reason."
My empty stomach churned, and for the first time I was glad that I hadn't eaten in days. Silent, I flattened myself against the damp stones and hoped that he wouldn't find me.
It was futile, I knew it, but there was no place for me to run, no place for me to escape to. I was trapped like an animal, trapped and waiting to be slaughtered.
"Come Ken, it's useless to hide. Be a good boy and do what I say."
I curled deeper into my fetal position, ducking my head between my knees and drawing my legs as close to my body as I could manage. Waves of pain washed over every nerve, and I bit my lip to keep myself from crying out. Terror had settled permanently on my heart, I wished to any listening god that they'd kill me to end my miserable suffering.
Rape.
With every heartbeat the word echoed in my head.
Rape.
He could do it. He was bigger, stronger, and determined. He could do it.
Rape.
Would he kill me after? He couldn't let me go free. He had to kill me. I prayed that he did.
Rape.
Had he captured anyone else? Did he rape all the children he had caught?
Rape.
Where was Dai? Where were the others? Had he captured them too? If he touched Dai, I would kill him.
Rape.
What had he said before? Something about Dai having to like me. How could Oikawa have known? Was he just guessing?
Rape.
He'd use Dai against me; I gritted my teeth when the realization struck me.
Rape.
But did he have Dai now? I couldn't be certain. It was possible, but unlikely. That thought was comforting.
Rape.
"Come out, come out, where ever you are!" Oikawa was coming closer to me. "Come out Ken, come to me."
Suddenly Oikawa had me. Two hands clenched around my arms and I was yanked from my hiding place. His grip was like steel and I didn't bother fighting.
He dragged me to the center of the room and threw me onto the ground. I whimpered, I couldn't help it, and hunched my body again in a vain attempt to save myself.
"No more games." Oikawa's voice was low and quiet. "You will do as I say."
I could feel tears puddle in my eyes and drip down my face. He would have to kill me before I submitted to him. "Bastard."
A sharp intake of breath told me that Oikawa had heard my whisper. He exhaled slowly, whistling slightly as the air left his lungs. "It won't hurt as much if you're willing," he noted absently. "It won't hurt so much if I don't want it to."
I turned away, wrapping my arms around myself to stop my body from shaking. "Bastard."
"You're mother says you're a good boy. That you obey your elders. That you understand when to follow." He paused. "Strip."
"No." I pushed myself to my feet. "I won't." The floor rocked under me, but I kept my balance. "You'll have to kill me. And then you won't have what you want. I'll never submit. Never."
"Fine." Oikawa grabbed me again, and I yelped as he pulled me against him. This time I fought back, flailing, kicking and hitting with all my tired might, but he was too much for me.
He pinned my arms back with one massive arm and with the other hand groped around my waist until he found the top of my pants.
"Bastard!" Panic spiked into me and I went crazy with fright. "Bastard!"
Despite my wild fighting, he had overpowered me. Before I could comprehend what had happened, my pants were off. The cold air numbed my skin and I froze for a moment, too scared to move.
He was tugging at my shirt, his clammy hands caressing my stomach as he pulled my sweater off. Again I froze, and he used the moment to rip my shirt off.
Clad only in my boxers, I felt more vulnerable than ever. He still had me caught in his arms, and the feel of him around me sickened every inch of my body.
He was going to do it. He was actually going to do it.
"Bastard! Bastard! Let me go! I'll kill you, I swear it! Let me go!" I was sobbing and screaming together, my voice choking on emotion. "Bastard! Bastard!"
He dropped me, and I landed in a dazed pile on the icy ground.
Baffled, I sat, my breath catching my throat with every inhale of the moldy air. Too stunned to act, I could only sit dumb, waiting for hell to find me.
Oikawa shucked off his jacket. He cracked his knuckles and leaned down until his hot breath ruffled my hair. "I'm going to enjoy this."
~~~
*Still* can't write the rape scene. Dammit. Poor ken. I feel so guilty.
~~~
I huddled against the cold wall, my mind running wild. He couldn't rape me. He couldn't rape me. He couldn't, he couldn't, he couldn't.
"Come on Ken," Oikawa cooed from the darkness, "I untied your hands for a reason."
My empty stomach churned, and for the first time I was glad that I hadn't eaten in days. Silent, I flattened myself against the damp stones and hoped that he wouldn't find me.
It was futile, I knew it, but there was no place for me to run, no place for me to escape to. I was trapped like an animal, trapped and waiting to be slaughtered.
"Come Ken, it's useless to hide. Be a good boy and do what I say."
I curled deeper into my fetal position, ducking my head between my knees and drawing my legs as close to my body as I could manage. Waves of pain washed over every nerve, and I bit my lip to keep myself from crying out. Terror had settled permanently on my heart, I wished to any listening god that they'd kill me to end my miserable suffering.
Rape.
With every heartbeat the word echoed in my head.
Rape.
He could do it. He was bigger, stronger, and determined. He could do it.
Rape.
Would he kill me after? He couldn't let me go free. He had to kill me. I prayed that he did.
Rape.
Had he captured anyone else? Did he rape all the children he had caught?
Rape.
Where was Dai? Where were the others? Had he captured them too? If he touched Dai, I would kill him.
Rape.
What had he said before? Something about Dai having to like me. How could Oikawa have known? Was he just guessing?
Rape.
He'd use Dai against me; I gritted my teeth when the realization struck me.
Rape.
But did he have Dai now? I couldn't be certain. It was possible, but unlikely. That thought was comforting.
Rape.
"Come out, come out, where ever you are!" Oikawa was coming closer to me. "Come out Ken, come to me."
Suddenly Oikawa had me. Two hands clenched around my arms and I was yanked from my hiding place. His grip was like steel and I didn't bother fighting.
He dragged me to the center of the room and threw me onto the ground. I whimpered, I couldn't help it, and hunched my body again in a vain attempt to save myself.
"No more games." Oikawa's voice was low and quiet. "You will do as I say."
I could feel tears puddle in my eyes and drip down my face. He would have to kill me before I submitted to him. "Bastard."
A sharp intake of breath told me that Oikawa had heard my whisper. He exhaled slowly, whistling slightly as the air left his lungs. "It won't hurt as much if you're willing," he noted absently. "It won't hurt so much if I don't want it to."
I turned away, wrapping my arms around myself to stop my body from shaking. "Bastard."
"You're mother says you're a good boy. That you obey your elders. That you understand when to follow." He paused. "Strip."
"No." I pushed myself to my feet. "I won't." The floor rocked under me, but I kept my balance. "You'll have to kill me. And then you won't have what you want. I'll never submit. Never."
"Fine." Oikawa grabbed me again, and I yelped as he pulled me against him. This time I fought back, flailing, kicking and hitting with all my tired might, but he was too much for me.
He pinned my arms back with one massive arm and with the other hand groped around my waist until he found the top of my pants.
"Bastard!" Panic spiked into me and I went crazy with fright. "Bastard!"
Despite my wild fighting, he had overpowered me. Before I could comprehend what had happened, my pants were off. The cold air numbed my skin and I froze for a moment, too scared to move.
He was tugging at my shirt, his clammy hands caressing my stomach as he pulled my sweater off. Again I froze, and he used the moment to rip my shirt off.
Clad only in my boxers, I felt more vulnerable than ever. He still had me caught in his arms, and the feel of him around me sickened every inch of my body.
He was going to do it. He was actually going to do it.
"Bastard! Bastard! Let me go! I'll kill you, I swear it! Let me go!" I was sobbing and screaming together, my voice choking on emotion. "Bastard! Bastard!"
He dropped me, and I landed in a dazed pile on the icy ground.
Baffled, I sat, my breath catching my throat with every inhale of the moldy air. Too stunned to act, I could only sit dumb, waiting for hell to find me.
Oikawa shucked off his jacket. He cracked his knuckles and leaned down until his hot breath ruffled my hair. "I'm going to enjoy this."
~~~
*Still* can't write the rape scene. Dammit. Poor ken. I feel so guilty.