Well here it is, my first fan fic! If I get some good reviews I may write more. You might understand this song fic better if you have heard the "Bohemian Rhapsody" by Queen.
Disclaimer: All the characters are the property of the wonderful J.K Rowling. This fic was inspired by Freddy Mercury's song "Bohemian Rhapsody" which belongs to him. (I love Queen , don't you?)
Harry Potter Rhapsody
*Voldemort has his wand pointed at Harry who is laying on the ground*
"Muhahahahahaha, I'm going to kill you," shrieked Voldemort.
"Uh, Voldie? It's kinda scary when you laugh," said Harry.
"Oh my god, it is? Sorry," replied Voldemort shuffling his feet and looking highly embarrassed. " Well, er, do you have any last words before I KILL YOU ONCE AND FOR-"
"Dude, cool it. I'm sitting right here and I can hear you perfectly well when you are not yelling."
"Hsssss sssss hiiiiiiissssssss," hissed Voldemort.
"Hey, if you think I can't hear you swear in parseltongue you're wrong. I don't want to hear those dirty words come out of your mouth again; do you understand young man?" said Harry sternly, peering over the rim of his glasses. *Voldemort begins to sob loudly*
"What's up with you?"
"I'm s-s-sorry b-but you sound just like my mommy," choked Voldemort.
"Oh, I'm sorry- wait you never even knew your mommy!" yelled Harry.
"Oh, right. Well then back to business. What are your last words Potter."
"I'm going to sing you a little song," replied Harry.
"Oh, goodie!" cried Voldemort. *Harry begins to sing*
"Is this real life?
Is this just fantasy?
Caught by the dark lord,
No escape from dear Voldie.
Open your eyes,
Look up at my scar and see,
I'm Harry Potter.
I need some sympathy,
because my dad is dead,
mom is dead,
little scar on my head.
Don't hit me with a broom, please
Cause it really matters to me,
To me
"Hitting you with a broom? I've never tried that before," said Voldemort.
"Shhhhh!" replied Harry.
"Voldie Don't kill me now,
You've got a wand against my head,
Say Avada Kedavra then I'm dead.
Voldielife has just begun,
And now you're gonna throw it all away.
Voldie ooo,
Didn't mean to break your power,
I was only one years old when it happened,
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, but it doesn't really matter."
"Too bad I'm going to kill you anyway. You have a way of deflating my ego and I don't
like it."
"Just shut up and listen O.K.?" said Harry who was beginning to get frustrated.
*Suddenly a large group of people apparate to the scene including Dumbledore, Professor McGonagol, Cornelius Fudge, Professor Snape, Professor Lockhart, and a large Magical Law Enforcement team*
"Never fear Harry I will save you from Lord Voldemort!" cried Dumbledore in a loud voice.
" No, please allow me," said Lockhart pointing his wand at Voldemort, and muttering some odd words.
*Voldemort now has no bones in his right arm and Harry resumes singing*
"Too late, my time has come,
Sends shivers down my spine-
Body's aching all the time
Goodbye everybody-I've got to go-
Gotta leave you all behind and face the truth
Voldie ooo-
I don't want to die,
I sometimes wish I'd never been born at all-"
"Gee kid, I didn't know you felt that way," said Voldemort.
"Well duh I feel that way. You're going to kill me, right?" spat Harry.
"Oh yeah."
"I won't let him kill you, Harry. And remember fame's a fickle friend." said Lockhart importantly.
"You stay away from me. I can handle this," replied Harry. "Now everybody SHUT UP, AND LET ME SING!"
*Harry switches to an opera style of singing*
"I see a little silhouetto of a grim,"
(*Professor Trelawney appears suddenly*
"Did I hear someone say grim?")
"Dumbledore, Dumbledore will you do the fandango"
( "Well if you insist Harry."
*Dumbledore grabs Professor McGonagol and begins to do a stupid sort of dance*)
"Flash of green and lightning- very very frightening me-
You know who,
( "What?")
You know who,
( "What!!")
You know who,
( "What!!!" )
You know who,
("Oh I give up!!!")
You know who figaro-magnifico-
( "Harry, how many times do I have to tell you, don't call him You know who. Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself," said Dumbledore.
"Stay out of this Dumbledore," replied Harry. *Harry begins to sing again*)
"I'm Harry Potter, my scar is famous"
(*The rest of the crowd join in singing. Lockhart and Snape in high falsettos and McGonagol as a low bass*)
"He's Harry Potter, we love Harry Potter,
spare him his life from this monstrosity."
(*Harry sings alone*)
"Easy come easy go-, will you let me go
(*Voldemort begins to sing*)
"Bismillah! No-, I will not let you go
-let me go
Bismillah! I will not let you go
-let me go
Bismillah! I will not let you go
-let me go
Will not let you go-let me go
Will not let you go-let me go
No,no,no,no,no,no,no-
(*Harry and the crowd sing*)
Mama mia, mama mia, mama mia let me go-
("You don't have a mother. I killed her. Muhahahahahah-")
Professor Sprout has a devil snare aside for me, for me, for me-"
(*Music switches from opera to rock. Harry sings alone*)
"So you think you can curse me and spit in my eye-
So you think you can laugh and just leave me to die-
Oh Voldie-can't do this to me Voldie-
Just gotta get out-just gotta get right outta here-
(*Music changes to slow and soft*)
"Nothing really matters,
Anyone can see,
Nothing really matters-, nothing really matters to me,
*There is wild applause and cheering as Harry finishes his song. Voldemort looks close to a mental break down and is weeping at Harry's feet.*
"You k-know I d-don't really want to kill you after all," said Voldemort.
"Whoopee!"
"Will you forgive me Harry?"
"Sure," said Harry.
"But I killed you're parents," said Voldemort.
"That's O.K. I like the Dursleys," replied Harry happily.
Voldemorts expression brightened, " By the way, you've got a great voice."
"Thanks. I'd say the same about you."
"So do you want to grab a butterbeer at the Leaky Cauldron?" asked Voldemort.
"Sure," said Harry.
And Voldemort and Harry skipped of hand in hand leaving the rest of the crowd standing dumbfounded in a circle. (Dumbledore was still doing the fandango, Snape was thinking about a career in the opera, and Professor Trelawney was looking for the grim.)
So, did you like it? It would make me very happy if you would review, but please no flames! This is only my first fic remember. Thanks for reading!
-Snidget