Rogue sat up late one night in her classroom, grading the stack of tests she had given to her American government classes that day. Scott had laughed when she'd told him that she tried to get test back to her students the day after they'd taken them and had told her that she'd grow out of that soon enough. She'd been surprised that Scott, the mansion's official overachiever, had had such an attitude, but now she realized how easily it was to get overwhelmed with grading and that this was probably too hard of a task for even him to perform.
Rogue's eyes started to blur as they darted from the tests to the answer key, and she wished more than anything that she'd just given in and made the test on one of those Scantron sheets. She'd much rather have a machine grading these things for her.
"Burning the midnight oil?"
Rogue looked up. "Bobby! Hey! Come in here and talk to me."
Bobby raised an eyebrow. "Since when did you want my company."
"Since I got so bored that I'd talk to a brick wall if I thought it would respond."
"Gee, thanks."
"Come on, have a seat. You can help me grade these damn things."
"Wow. I get to grade papers. I'm so honored," Bobby said as he pulled a chair up to Rogue's desk.
"I can tell. You sound thrilled."
"Oh, I am, really," He took a test and Rogue turned the answer key so he could see it to. "So what was the test on anyway?"
"The early political theories that contributed to the Declaration of Independence and, eventually, the Constitution as well."
"Um, sounds, um, exciting."
"You'd like it if I was the one teaching it to you."
"Oh, I don't doubt that. You could stand up here and talk about knitting for hours and I'd be enthralled."
"Would you be paying attention to a word I was saying?"
"No."
"Well, at least you're honest."
Bobby and Rogue graded her papers together, with the only conversation for a while occurring when he'd ask her how to score a confusing answer. When they were through, Rogue slumped back in her chair in relief. "Finally!" she said. "Thanks for helping me with that. I was about to go crazy trying to get them done."
"What, have you had them for a month or something?" Bobby asked.
"No, they turned them in today, I just don't like to make my students wait for their test grades."
"Wow. You're more of an overachiever that Scott."
"Oh shut up."
"Make me."
Rogue reached up and put her hand over his mouth. Bobby leaned in and kissed it. Rogue pulled her hand away and looked away, blushing.
"I'm…I'm sorry, Rogue. I shouldn't have done that."
"No, it's okay. It just surprised me, that's all."
Rogue looked up, and the sight of her flushed face took Bobby's breath away. He reached out and cupped her chin in his hand, and she didn't move. He pulled her face closer, until finally their lips met. Rogue stiffened at first, then relaxed into the kiss. Bobby moved his hands to her back to support her, then gently lifted her up and put her in his lap. Rogue tangled her hands in his hair.
Rogue's thoughts were in a blur. All she could think was how good it felt to be pressed up against another warm body, to have someone else's hands and lips on her. She moaned against his mouth and pushed herself closer to him. Rogue could feel his body responding.
Bobby stood up, bringing Rogue with him. She wrapped her legs around his hips and he held on to her with one arm behind her back while he swiped all the papers they'd work so hard to grade on to the floor. He lowered them both down on to the now-cleared desk, never once breaking the kiss.
Their hands were a flurry of motion, and it wasn't long until both of their shirts ended up on the ground. Bobby's mouth began to trail from Rogue's lips down her neck and she ran her hands along his back.
Suddenly, the full impact of what she was doing hit Rogue, and she pushed up on Bobby's chest. "Wait…Bobby…we need to stop."
He pulled up and looked down at her. "What's wrong?"
"We can't do this. It's too sudden," Rogue said.
"Sudden? Rogue, I've been wanting this for five years…"
Rogue pushed him off her and sat up, covering her nearly-bare chest with her arms. "I know, but it's too sudden for me. I'm not ready to jump into a relationship at this level."
Bobby nodded. "I understand."
"So you're not mad at me?"
"No. I'm disappointed, but I'm not mad at you. I'm not going to be upset with you because you're not ready for something like that." He took her face in his hands, forcing her to look into his eyes. "I love you, Rogue, and yes, I want to sleep with you. No point in denying that. But if you're not ready for that now and want to wait, or even if you never want to with me, that's fine. I don't want to pressure you into something you're just going to regret."
Rogue's eyes filled up with tears. "Thank you, Bobby."
Bobby walked over and got Rogue's shirt, handed it to her, and wiped the tears from her eyes. "Go on and go to bed. I'll stay and clean up this mess here."
"Thank you," Rogue said softly. She slipped her shirt back on, then gave Bobby a light kiss before running out of the room.
Bobby watched her go, wondering what would happen now.
*** *** ***
As soon as her last class was over the next day, Rogue ran up to her old room. "Jubilee, thank God you're in," she said as her best friend opened the door.
"Um, Rogue, are you okay?" Jubilee asked.
"Is anyone else here?"
"Uh, just Kitty…"
"Good. I need to talk to her, too." Rogue pushed her way into the room and sat down on the couch where her bed used to be. "I have a slight problem."
Kitty and Jubilee both sat across from Rogue on Jubilee's bed. "What is it?" Kitty asked.
"I almost had sex with Bobby."
"Yeah, I'd have to say that would be a problem," Jubilee said.
"When?" Kitty asked.
"Last night. I was grading papers, and he helped me. We were just talking and the next thing I know we were lying on my desk, ripping each other's clothes off."
"Dang, Girl, I didn't know that grading got you teachers so hot and bothered…" Jubilee said.
Rogue frowned. "Ha ha. This is serious!"
"So what do you plan to do about it?" Kitty asked.
"I don't know. I made him stop last night…I just wasn't ready for something like that with him."
"Do you think you'd ever be ready?" Kitty asked.
Rogue sighed. "Maybe…I don't know. I'm so confused!" She buried her face in her hands.
"Well, did you like what was happening between you two up to the point where you stopped?" Jubilee asked.
"Yes, but I don't know if I liked it because it was Bobby or just because I wasn't alone."
"Well, maybe you should talk to Bobby about it," Kitty suggested. "You might find you really like him, and maybe you guys could be happy together."
"I think Kitty's right," Jubilee said. "Bobby could be good for you, Rogue."
"You guys really think so?" Rogue asked.
Jubilee and Kitty both nodded. "Yeah, we do," Jubilee said.
"I just don't know if I'm ready for a relationship. I mean, I just lost Logan…"
"Rogue, you need to get over Logan," Jubilee said. "He's gone. Maybe Bobby could be just what you need to get on with your life."
Rogue looked up. "I just don't know. Do y'all really think Bobby would be right for me?"
"Of course!" Kitty said. "He's sweet, funny, cute…what more could you need?"
"Fuzzy sideburns and adamantium claws," Rogue thought dryly. "I can't think of anything," she said.
"You really should pursue this thing with Bobby," Jubilee said. "Even if you just start out with something small—a dinner date maybe."
"Yeah…" Rogue said. "Dinner couldn't hurt."
"So go talk to him," Jubilee said.
"Yeah, go talk to Bobby," Kitty urged. "You two really would make the perfect couple."
Rogue stood up. "Okay, I'll go talk to him. Maybe it could work with us."
"I'm sure it will," Kitty said.
"Thanks, y'all," Rogue said, leaving to find Bobby.
*** *** ***
Rogue felt like she was hyperventilating as soon as she knocked on Bobby's door. What was she going to say? She'd felt so confident when she was talking to Kitty and Jubilee, but now…now she wasn't so sure.
"Yes?"
Rogue looked up, startled, and then realized Bobby's roommate, St. John, had answered the door. "Um, is Bobby there?"
"Yeah. I'll get him for ya. Hey, Robert, girl for you at the door!"
Bobby stepped out a moment later. He was wearing a T-shirt and sweatpants, and Rogue could tell from his wet hair that he'd just recently gotten out of the shower. "Uh, hey, Rogue."
"Hey, Bobby."
"I'll, um, leave you two alone," St. John said, slipping back into the room.
"So, what brings you here?" Bobby asked.
"I wanted to talk." Rogue paused, then added quickly. "About last night."
"Rogue, look, I'm sorry about that. Things got carried away, I didn't mean for that to happen. Don't be upset with me."
"No! I mean, I'm not upset with you at all. Actually, I was thinking maybe we could do something tonight. But you don't look like you were exactly prepared to go anywhere…"
"Uh, I can get ready real quick, I swear," Bobby said. "What did you have in mind?"
"Dinner maybe? Outside the mansion?"
"Sounds good. Meet you in half an hour and we'll decide where to go from there?"
"Great. I'll meet you in the foyer at…" Rogue looked down at her watch. "Five thirty?"
"I'll be there."
Rogue smiled. "Okay. See you then."
Bobby smiled back. "See you then."
*** *** ***
Rogue glanced at herself in the mirror, searching for any imperfection she may have left uncovered. "Don't be stupid, Girl," she chided herself. "Bobby'll like ya no matter what you look like. After all, he's seen ya at your worst and still kept on loving you."
She took a deep breath as she went to her closet and pulled out her jacket. She slipped it on and put her hand into the pocket. She felt a crumpled piece of paper in and took it out. She unfolded it, and as her eyes glanced over the first few words, she felt her heart stop.
Marie—
I don't know quite how to say this to make you understand, but leaving…
Rogue crumpled the paper again and threw it to ground as if it were on fire. Why had she picked the jacket she'd worn on her trip home from Canada? She hadn't worn it since she'd gotten back, and she had plenty of other ones to choose from.
Rogue frowned. Maybe it was a sign. But what kind of sign? Was it a sign that she shouldn't go out with Bobby because she wasn't over Logan enough yet, or a sign that she should go out with Bobby because Logan was all wrong for her. She bounced the two possibilities around in her head for a moment before deciding that trying to read into signs was a waste of her time.
She put the jacket on and left the room. The letter remained in a ball on the floor.
*** *** ***
Bobby looked across the table at Rogue. He couldn't believe he was there, with her—on a real date. After so many years of waiting, he was so close to having the woman of his dreams. He reached out and took Rogue's hand. She just smiled at him and didn't pull away.
"I'm glad you wanted to come out with me tonight," Bobby said.
"Me, too," Rogue said. "I'm having a good time with you."
"Rogue, I need to ask you something," Bobby said, pulling his hand away. "It's serious."
"Okay…ask away."
"Where do I stand with you?"
"I've been asking myself the same question."
"And?"
Rogue looked away in order to avoid his gaze. "I don't know. I mean, it's so soon…after…after Logan."
"Rogue, Logan's gone."
"I know! It's just, well, I don't know if I can open myself up to someone like that again." She looked up and a single tear rolled down her cheek. "I'm still hurtin', Bobby."
"But I'm not going to hurt you the way he did. Rogue, I've loved you for five years and not once have those feelings wavered," Bobby said. "What do I have to do to prove my loyalty to you."
"Please, Bobby, I'm trying…I just don't know yet, okay?"
Bobby gave her the best smile he could muster. "I'll give you as much time as you need, Rogue. No pressure."
"I'll try not to make you wait too long."
*** *** ***
Rogue and Bobby parked the car in the mansion's parking lot and then walked together towards the door in the garage. "Still don't have a permit to park your car inside, huh?" Rogue said teasingly.
"Nah, I guess the Professor just doesn't think my car is as valuable as his Rolls-Royce."
"Imagine that." Rogue stopped short. "What's that sound?"
Bobby listened for a moment, then said. "I think someone left the radio on down here."
"Probably Scott," Rogue said. "He comes down here to work on his motorcycle, and then Jean does that mind-thingy to call him inside and he forgets to turn it off."
"And he's supposed to be the together one of the team."
"Hey, compared to the rest of us…"
"Very true." Bobby gave her a charming grin. "Well, since we have the music anyway, care to dance?"
"I don't know…I'm not much of a dancer."
"Oh, come on. I've seen you dance plenty of times. Remember the time that Jubilee dared you to dance on the table in the cafeteria?"
Rogue turned bright red. "I can't believe you remember that!"
"Rogue, I believe that image is forever burned into my mind. Along with the look on Scott's face when he walked in and your sweater hit him in the face."
"I had a shirt on under it!"
"I know that. All though I don't think he realizes that at first…"
Rogue shook her head. "Can't I just put that behind me?"
"Not with the Polaroids still floating out there somewhere. Now come on, dance with me. A song's just starting."
"It's slow."
"Even better." Bobby pulled Rogue to him and she quickly gave in.
Girl, I know you're hurting
Right now you feel like
You could never love again
Now all I ask is for a chance
To prove that I love you
Rogue rested her head on Bobby's shoulder and wrapped her arms around his waist. He put one hand on the small of her back and the other in her hair. She sighed against him, so grateful to feel loved, wanted.
From the first day that I saw your smiling face
Honey, I knew that we would be together forever
Ooh and I asked you out, you said no
But I found out
Darling, that you'd been hurt
You felt that you'd never love again
I deserve a try, honey, just once
Give me a chance and I'll prove this all wrong
You walked in you were so quick to judge
But honey, he's nothing like me
Bobby kissed the top of Rogue's hair and pulled her closer to him. He could feel her tears soaking through his shirt and Bobby wanted nothing more than to erase all the pain Logan had caused her. He couldn't fathom how any man could receive Rogue's unconditional love and then just throw it away. He swore that if he ever truly made her his, he'd never hurt her the way Logan had. Never.
I'll never break your heart
I'll never make you cry
I'd rather die, then live without you
I'll give you all of me
Honey that's no lie
I'll never break your heart
I'll never make you cry
I'd rather die, then live without you
I'll give you all of me
Honey that's no lie
Rogue was surprised at how warm she felt next to Bobby. His skin had always been cold to the touch in the past, but tonight, it wasn't. She remembered it hadn't been the night before either, in her classroom. But Rogue didn't want to think about that. She didn't want to think about anything. All she wanted to do was feel.
As time goes by you will get to know me
A little more better
Girl that's the way love goes baby, baby
I know you are afraid to let
Your feelings show (feelings show)
And I understand
But girl it's time to let go
Girl it's time to let go(girl it's time to let go)
Bobby looked down to see Rogue staring up at him, tears in her eyes. He kissed them away, feeling her shiver in his arms. "I love you," he said. Rogue nodded, unable to speak. Bobby leaned down and captured her lips in a kiss.
I'll never break your heart
No way (no way)no how
I'll make you cry
Oh, need me
Honey no way
I'll do you right(no how)
I say no how
As she kissed Bobby, Rogue pushed away all her lingering doubts. "To Hell with Logan," she thought. "I can and will live my life without him and be perfectly happy." She put her all into the embrace, meeting Bobby passion for passion.
I would never do that to you girl
Ooh, just give me a chance
To prove you how much I love you
I would give you the world
If you're my girl...
As the song ended, Bobby and Rogue moved their kiss from the garage into the mansion. It was late enough that most of the morning people were already in bed, but still early enough that most of the night owls were still out, but neither Rogue nor Bobby cared if they ran into anyone or not. They staggered up the stairs—never once taking their hands off each other—and when they reached Rogue's room, they toppled in, shutting the door behind them.
*** *** ***
It didn't take long for Bobby and Rogue to be known as a couple around the mansion. Jubilee and Kitty were happy for their friend, feeling like she had finally chosen what was best for her. She never mentioned Logan anymore, never wore his dogtags, and always had a smile in public.
Bobby was devoted to her, gave her everything she could ever need or want, and everyone said they were perfect for each other, and wanted to know why it had taken so long for them to finally get together. Rogue decided that someone like Bobby must've been what Logan thought was the kind of man she deserved.
Nevertheless, when Rogue was alone, she couldn't always ignore the lingering emptiness she felt inside. She didn't just miss Logan—she missed what he made her feel. Bobby just couldn't light her on fire the way Wolverine had.
But as she lay next to Bobby, watching him sleep in what had become their bedroom, Rogue knew she couldn't hold that against him. She doubted any man would be able to affect her the way Logan had. The love she had with Bobby was the kind two people could build a life together with, and she wasn't about to throw it away for a memory.
Rogue smiled as she ran her hand through Bobby's hair. She had the kind of life many people dreamed of. Sure, the mansion wasn't exactly a quaint house with a white picket fence, and she couldn't bake an apple pie to save her life, but she heard day in and day out that she and Bobby made the perfect American couple. She knew it would only be a matter of time before he proposed and it would be a storybook wedding.
Rogue lay back down in the bed, though sleep didn't come for quite some time.
*** *** ***
Something wasn't right about the day. It reminded Rogue of one summer she'd spent in Biloxi as a child with her grandmother. A hurricane had come through, and all day there had been the unsettling "calm before the storm." Rogue felt that now, as if something was coming.
She found out just before sunset just what that "something" was.
Rogue was sitting on the couch in the main room with Kitty watching the news when she heard the sound of a motorcycle. Rogue froze.
"What is it?" Kitty asked.
"I hear a motorcycle. Logan's here."
"Rogue, the sound of a motorcycle does not automatically mean Logan. Scott has a motorcycle, and so do a few of the students. It could be any one of them."
"No, Kitty. That's Logan's motorcycle. Trust me."
"I don't know, Rogue, after what you said happened between you guys the last time you saw him, it just doesn't seem like he'd come back here."
"Kitty, it has been a while. Maybe he's figured I've moved on—which I have—and doesn't feel the need to hide out anymore."
"Possibly, but I still don't see how you can be so positive that it's…"
"Hey, Darlin'."
Rogue bolted up and turned around and Kitty grew completely silent. Rogue walked over to Logan and slapped him hard, ignoring how badly his adamantium-laced bones made her hand sting. "I am not your 'Darlin''," she growled at him before she sauntered up stairs.
Kitty stared for a moment longer until she realized Logan was looking at her. She turned back to the news.
Wolverine slumped off to find the Professor.
*** *** ***
Marie sat in a chair beside the window in her room, crying. How could he do this to her? After leaving her alone to live her life and get past all the pain he'd caused her, why did Logan have to come back ? Wouldn't it be easier for him just to keep up with his loner lifestyle? What kept calling him back to the mansion?
Marie looked down at the palm of the hand she'd used to slap Logan, and realized it was probably going to bruise. But she didn't care. It had been worth it just to cause him even a brief second of pain after all he'd put her through.
"Rogue? Rogue, sweetheart, are you in here?" Bobby asked as he came quietly into their room.
"I'm over by the window," Rogue called out to him, her emotional state betrayed by her voice.
Bobby ran over to her. "Are you all right?"
She shook her head. "No."
Bobby got her a tissue from the bedside table. He handed it to her, then crouched down beside her chair. "What happened? Why are you crying?"
Rogue couldn't answer him. All she could do was cry harder.
"Please…tell me…" Bobby begged. He hated seeing her in pain, especially when he didn't know why.
"Logan," she said between sobs. "He's back."
Bobby's blood ran colder than usual. "Logan? Wolverine?"
Rogue nodded.
Bobby didn't know what to say. He wanted to ask her if she still loved Logan, but was afraid that he couldn't handle the answer if it wasn't the one he wanted to hear. "Are…are you going to be okay?" he asked in a rush.
"I think so. It's just seeing him again brought so much rushing to the surface and I guess I just couldn't handle it."
"What can I do to help you?"
Rogue's whole body was shaking with the force of her sobs. "Hold me, Bobby. Please, I just need to be held."
Bobby pulled her down from the chair and into his lap on the floor and held her close.
*** *** ***
"Hey, you!"
Jubilee heard someone calling down the hall. She turned around and saw Wolverine standing a few feet away from her. "Me?"
"Do you see anyone else around?"
"Um, no, but at this place that doesn't necessarily mean no one else is here," Jubilee said.
"Don't get smart on me, Kid," Logan growled. "Are you that girl that used to wear yellow all the time? Rogue's friend?"
"My name is Jubilation Lee. Jubilee to all my friends, and Ms. Lee to you. And yes, I'm that girl."
"All right, Ms. Lee, can you answer a question for me?"
Jubilee crossed her arms in front of her. "Depends. Ask me the question and I'll tell you if I've got an answer."
"You have any idea why Rogue woulda slapped me when I came back?" Logan asked.
"She slapped him?!" Jubilee thought. "Go Rogue!" "Jeez, if you can't figure that one out you're dumber than you look," she told Wolverine.
"What's that supposed to mean?"
Jubilee sighed. "Men. I never understood why everyone else doesn't realize they were born simply to be love-slaves for all the much more highly advanced women. Anyway, let me try to explain it to you—in small words so your dumb ass can understand. You hurt Rogue. Rogue cry—long time. Rogue get over you. Rogue love Bobby now. You come back. You piss Rogue off. Comprende?"
"Thanks, Tarzan, I think I got it."
"Glad to be of service," Jubilee said sarcastically. "Now if you don't mind, I'll be going now."
"Wait, one more question. And you don't have to answer me like I'm brain dead this time."
Jubilee rolled her eyes. "As long as you don't ask another question that makes you sound brain dead, I won't."
"How serious are Rogue and Bobby?"
"Very. They've been together for ten months, sharing a room for eight, and I happen to know that Bobby's going to pop the question very soon—and when he does, Rogue's gonna say yes. So don't you dare mess things up for her. You've fucked with that girl enough. It's time for you to get your kicks elsewhere."
"I was never just getting my 'kicks' with her."
"Yeah, whatever, Buster. You weren't here every time you broke Rogue into a million teeny-tiny little pieces and she had to be glued back together. I was, and plenty of times I was the one holding the bottle of Elmer's. Rogue doesn't deserve going through something like that again."
"I know," Logan said. "And I want to make it up to her somehow, and at least get her friendship back. I know now I didn't do right by her."
"Yeah, well, great observation, but it's a little too late. Now if you don't mind, I have better things to do with my time."
Jubilee walked away, leaving Logan speechless.
*** *** ***
It was well after whatever hours society's norms deemed "decent," and Logan was lying on his bed alone, smoking a cigar. He heard a faint tap and sat up. Was someone knocking on his door?
He listened intently until he heard the sound again. This time he was certain it was the door. He frowned as he went to answer it, wondering who could be disturbing him this late, and not even bothering to put on a shirt to cover his bare chest.
He caught her scent before he'd even opened the door all the way. "Marie?"
She was holding out his dogtags. "I believe these belong to you."
Logan felt a lump grow in his throat as he took them from her small, trembling hands and placed them around his neck. He'd missed the feel of them hanging against his chest when he's first given them away, but now, he wanted them off more than anything else in the world, for he knew that having them meant he'd lost Marie.
"Marie…I…"
"Don't say it Logan. I don't want to hear anything from you anymore. Everything you ever said to me was a lie."
"No! Marie, that ain't true! I never lied to you, Darlin', I just couldn't always keep my promises."
"I told you Logan, I'm not your 'Darlin''."
Logan looked down at the ground. "I know."
Marie could feel her resolve slipping. She had come planning to be strong and give Wolverine his dogtags back, cutting off the last of her ties to him, but she certainly hadn't planned on him answering the door shirtless. She guessed she should've known, since that was how he liked to sleep, but she just hadn't entered that factor into the equation, and it made quite a big difference. For some reason, the sight of Logan's chest had always made her weak in the knees.
"Well, that's why I came, so I might as well go now," Marie said.
"No, wait. Stay," Logan said, his head darting up so his eyes could meet hers.
"I can't. Logan, Bobby and I are…"
"I know," Logan said. "But I don't mean like that. I want you to stay and talk to me. Fill me in on what I've missed."
Marie shook her head. "I'm sorry, Logan, but I'm not telling you what you missed. You're going to figure that out on your own."
Rogue walked away, moving her hips in a way that made sure Logan knew exactly what he'd been missing.
*** *** ***
Rogue leaned against the inside of the door to her bedroom, trying to catch her breath. She was amazed at the level of control she'd just managed to maintain. As soon as Logan had opened the door she'd wanted to throw everything from the life she'd built since Logan to the wayside and jump Wolverine right then and there. But she hadn't. She'd stayed strong.
She was shaking when she climbed back into bed with Bobby. He hadn't moved since she'd gotten up, and Rogue was grateful for the fact that he was such a heavy sleeper. She moved close to him, reminding herself over and over again just how lucky she was to have all that she did, and that she shouldn't see Logan as anything more than a past fling who she just happened to have amazing chemistry with.
Rogue let out a deep breath. Why did Logan have a habit of coming back just when he could mess things up the most? Why couldn't he just stay out of her life the way he'd promised in the letter?
Why couldn't life just let her be happy?
*** *** ***
To be continued…