Lincoln's Modern Life

Chapter 2: Rocko in The Loud House

By Dr. John Smith

Lincoln and Rocko entered the hallway as the door slammed behind them. The hall seemed quiet, much to Rocko's delight. The wallaby looked around him. The stretching all only made him wonder about the size of the house itself. "You and your sisters live here?" Rocko asked. His house was only a fraction the size of his house. A small hamster in a ball rolled past Rocko's foot while a black cat chased it.

Lincoln nodded at Rocko's question. "Yup. We also have a few pets too." He mentioned. The boy and wallaby looked over to the cat batting the hamster ball around. "That's our cat Cliff and our hamster Geo." A yellow canary flew past the two. "That's our bird Walt." And finally, leaving Luna and Luan's room was a black and white pit bull terrier. Lincoln picked the small dog up and held him close. "Our dog Charles." He looked at Spunky and got an idea. "Hey boy, say hi to… uhhh?"

"Spunky." Said Rocko.

"Thanks." Replied Lincoln. "Say hi to Spunky, boy." Charles however, wasn't too thrilled with Spunky. Bearing his teeth Charles let out a low, angry growl. "H-hey boy. Be good now." The white haired boy said nervously. Spunky began to growl in Rocko's arms as well, until the two dogs lept from their owners and began barking into a fight cloud.

"Charles!"

"Spunky!"

The boy and wallaby did their best to stop the fight. Reaching into the cloud, they pulled who they thought was their respective dog. "Okay time to stop… Spunky?" Lincoln said as he pulled out the smaller dog. Rocko opened his eyes to see he was holding Charles. The dog growled as the wallaby let out a nervous chuckle.

"Hehe… Good boy…" But Charles wasn't too thrilled with the new guest. He began barking immediately and tried attacking Rocko. "Down boy!" Rocko screamed. Lincoln took it upon himself to keep Spunky and Charles at bay while Rocko made his escape. He ran past a few doors before stopping before an open one to catch his breath.

"Hey kangaroo!" Shouted a raspy, tomboy-esque voice. Rocko turned to the room before him to see a girl in a red and white jersey with her foot on a kick ball. "Think fast!" She shouted before tons, and tons of sports balls made their way towards poor Rocko. The wallaby screamed his trademark scream. His eyes enlarging with his brain springing out from the top of his head. He nearly escaped okay, only being pelted with a football and seventeen kickballs. He tried every door until he finally hid in one room. Exhaling a sigh of relief.

"Hey wallaby!" Shouted a demanding, yet tiny voice. Rocko opened his eyes to see two girls standing before him. One in a pink dress and the other in overalls. "Play with us!" They shouted in unison. Their arms ominously behind their backs.

"Okay… What do you want to play?" He asked.

The girls grinned devilish grins as they pulled from their backs two baseball bats. "Kangaroo piñata!" Rocko gave another scream and left as soon as he could. He ran past a punk girl rocking out on a guitar. A taller girl in blue walking down the hall talking on a cellphone. A smaller girl in black reciting a poem. And a yellow clad girl with braces trying to hit him with cream pies. Looking back he could see the two twins emerging from their room in a pink toy car. He decided to go for broke and threw himself down the stairs. Hitting every step along the way and landing face first on the ground.

After regaining his composure Rocko stood to face the reader. "The Loud House is a very dangerous house." He looked into the living room where he saw Filburt cleaning the coffee table before turning his attention to the dining room. Sitting at the large table of twelve chairs was Heffer. The yellow steer seemed to be downing a series of smoothies. All while a blonde girl with sunglasses looked on in awe. "Heffer?" Rocko said to himself. He walked towards his friend as he guzzled away at the smoothie. Slamming the cup down and let out a large, room tumbling burp.

"Wow!" The girl said in surprise. "No ones ever eaten my ghost pepper triple berry smoothie before!"

"That's nothing. I've eaten way, way worse before." Said the steer as he wiped his lips.

Rocko made his way into the room with a quizzical look. "Have all you been doing is eating?" He asked aloud.

"Oh hey Rocko." Greeted Heffer. "This girl makes the best smoothies."

"Hi Mr. Rocker!" Said the girl.

"Hello… uhhhh…"

"Oh! Right. My name is Leni." She said as she poured Heffer a triple berry smoothie. The pleasantries were interrupted by two familiar voices looking for Rocko. The wallaby screamed and hid under the table. Leni and Heffer heard Lola shouting.

"Hey turtle!" Shouted Lola.

The neurotic turtle stopped his cleaning. "Yes?" He replied nervously.

"Where's the kangaroo?" Asked Lana.

"I-I don't know.. I've been cleaning this whole time.." Lola didn't like his answer and hit his foot with her bat. Filburt letting out a loud shriek of pain. The two devious twins made their way to the dining room where Rocko was shaking like a leaf.

"Heffer! Leni! Please don't tell them where I am!"

"Mr. Rocker! Here!" Leni said quietly pointing to an open cupboard. Rocko took the chance and hid like it was his last life line. Just before the twins made their way in.

"Leni!" Shouted Lola. "Where is he?"

"Who?" Asked Leni.

"Don't play dumb, Leni." Said Lana.

"I'm not playing." Quipped the teen.

"I think I saw Rocko head towards the backyard." Said the steer and he gestured towards the kitchen. The twins nodded to Heffer then to each other. Lola capping Heffer's shin as they left. "Ouch!" He shouted. "What's with her?"

"She's just like that." Said Leni as she opened the cupboard to free Rocko.

The wallaby stretched from the cramped space before turning to the teen before him. "Thank you for the hiding spot, Leni." Said the wallaby. Leni just smiled in response before making her way back to the kitchen for another smoothie. Rocko took a seat beside the steer. "Heffer, how long do you think we'll be stuck here?" Asked Rocko.

"I don't know Rocko." Replied Heffer as he took a smoothie from a returning Leni. "But my mom always told me to make the best of a bad situation."

"Yeah Mr. Rocker. I make every bad situation fun!" Said Leni with glee. Her words coupled with Heffer's gave Rocko some hope. "Like one time I had to learn to drive and discovered there's a whole country named after me!"

Heffer looked to her in amazement. "Really?"

"Uh huh!"

"Hey Rocko! Let's go to Leni's country!" Said the steer in excitement.

Leni giggled with glee. "I bet they serve the best smoothies." All Rocko could do was look at the reader. If they were stuck there then it would be for quite some time. It was then that Lincoln strolled into the dining room while reading a comic book.

"Hey guys." Greeted the boy.

"Lincoln! Did you know Leni has a whole country named after her?" Shouted Heffer. Lincoln glanced at Rocko and vice versa. Remembering the hard time he had trying to teach her to drive. Rocko took notice of the comic Lincoln was reading and began to get very interested.

"Crickey, whose that?" Asked the wallaby. Lincoln looked at the cover of his newest edition of Ace Savvy.

"This? It's Ace Savvy." Lincoln replied.

"We don't have Ace Savvy where we're from." The wallaby said to the boy. Lincoln's eyes grew wide in disbelief.

"What!? How can you not have Ace Savvy! He's the best superhero."

Rocko simply shrugged. "We do have Really Really Big Man."

"Really Really Big Man?" Questioned Lincoln.

"Where we're from. He's the best superhero." Replied Rocko. The wallaby pulled out his O-phone and opened his comic app. "Just got the latest issue the other day." Lincoln traded Rocko his comic for his phone. Both reading their respective superhero comics. As they read their comics, Lincoln could feel his phone buzzing like crazy. He was getting a call from someone but he didn't say who. "Hello?" He asked the caller. "No way! Today? Alright! I'll be there!" He soon hung up and handed Rocko his phone back. "Sorry guys. Something came up."

"Who was it, Linky?" Asked his older sister.

"It was Ronnie Anne. She's in town for the weekend and wants to meet up." Replied her younger brother. He was just about to take off as Lori came in.

"Where do you think you're going, twerp?" Called out his oldest sister. Lincoln stopped dead in his tracks.

"Gus' Games and Grub." He responded nervously.

Lori raised an eyebrow. "By yourself? What about Clyde?"

"Clyde and his Dads are visiting some family out of town." He said truthfully.

"Okay then. Why don't you take our guests with you? I'm sure they're responsible." She looked in the living room to see Filburt dusting and over to the table to see Heffer guzzling a smoothie while Leni cheered. "I'm sure the kangaroo is responsible."

Lincoln groaned in annoyance. "Come on, Lori. Do I really need a chaperone?"

"Lincoln." Said Lori sternly.

"Fine…" He said in defeat. Rocko motioned to Filburt and Heffer to follow him.

"Don't worry Lori." Said Rocko. "We'll keep an eye on him."

"Just keep him out of trouble." Replied Lori before turning away.

Rocko stopped for a brief moment and remembered the scrap between Spunky and Charles. Instantly getting worried for his dog's safety. "Cricky, I don't know if I can go. Who's going to watch Spunky while we're gone?"

"I'll do it!" Chimed Leni.

"Really?" Asked the wallaby.

"Yeah! I'm totes good with animals. Sparky and I will have a great time!"

"Spunky."

"Bless you."

Rocko gulped nervously. "He's doomed." He said under his breath. Against Rocko's better judgment, the four of them took off towards the arcade.