Author's note:

This isn't really set in any specific time period. For context, all you really need to know is Harry Osborn's died, so you can play it at any point from the 90s to mid 2000s.

A lot of this was just me rambling and typing away, started off as one thing and slipped into another. Hope you enjoy.

Layers

Peter loved putting on the mask. Every time he would suit up and swing off to fight a bad guy thrilled him. The tinge of fear in his stomach that would accompany every flip, every twist, and turn he'd do in the air before webbing up Shocker or The Rhino gave him pleasure. He could never admit this to himself, but it was like a game. Yes, the stakes were high, and he was saving lives, but the objective was always simple. The clarity he would receive as Spider-Man was the only thing relieving him.

Because outside of the mask, when he's just plain ol' Peter Parker... it was hard. Despite having to put on a mask to take on the persona of Spider-Man, as Peter he was really the one covering up himself. Spider-Man could be smart, strong, fast, and bold. He was a hero through and through. But as Peter Parker, he had to be on edge. Without that mask, he was always on edge. It felt like... something was constantly wrong. Call him neurotic, but he had carried this habit for so long that it was instinctual, he had to downplay himself. He remembered when it was simple enough, acting a fool to slip away from his friends so he could stop whatever villain of the week was threatening to blow up New York City.

The number of times Gwendy would feel peeved by this behavior had led her to believe he was weak. It was a little inside joke to himself. He would take the names that Gwen and Flash would throw at him when he knew that wasn't really the truth. He was amazing but they didn't know it. The inside joke would grow more complex as this game of heroics did, and... and...

And it stopped being funny at one point.

The inside joke stopped being a joke once loved ones started to piece together that Peter wasn't actually some weakling who'd run away to call for help. Inside jokes were funny because of their exclusivity, right? Once others got to know it, then it wasn't as funny and the potential for it to be spoiled to others would leave it humorless. Believe him. Peter knew the various quips he had to explain to people immediately made things awkward and ruined the joke.

Peter remembered one of the first times the inside joke was spoiled.

Harry revealed he knew his secret identity. Peter had been clumsy and left his Spider-Man suit in a drawer without thinking things through and Harry found it. Harry knew Peter was Spider-Man. Harry was in on the joke, he got to have his laugh. Unfortunately, he tried to let others in on what was so funny.

GOTCHA!

Peter cringed, remembering countless nights of staying up, unable to fall asleep. GOTCHA! It replayed through his head like a broken record player.

No one believed Harry, fortunately. Everyone thought he was just some maniac. Peter Parker could never be Spider-Man. It left Peter a little guilty, knowing that he'd reserved so much of his identity to only himself and that once Harry found out, no one believed him.

Sure, it wasn't rational. Harry was a bad guy at the time, he was trying to hurt Peter. If others knew his secret, he would be targeted left and right. His loved ones would be targeted left and right. People he simply knew would be targeted left and right.

But it hurt Peter a little knowing that he could never truly be honest about who he was. If people knew, then they would have to be convinced they were just crazy, they don't know what they're talking about.

So much of his identity, Peter had to keep to himself. As Spider-Man, however, he just had to keep Peter's name out of his mouth. He could be everything Peter Parker could not be. Things were simple no matter how much being Spider-Man negatively affected his life. He knew himself very well and the bad guys knew it too.

At times, Peter would question his interactions with bad guys such as Norman Osborn who knew his secret identity. Was it wrong that Peter could be more himself around a serial killer who had killed his girlfriend, rather than friends he had known for years? Peter loved Harry. Harry was his best friend and understood Peter better than most. The two lived together. They had great times together. For a moment, it was an inside joke between the gang that they were a package deal as roommates. But between Peter and Norman, there was a mutual understanding no one else could understand. He knew he should never feel this way, but there was a sense of relief in knowing that someone else had the same plights, which putting on a mask could allow someone to be free truly.

Norman was in on the inside joke.

With Harry, when he put on the mask, he was not free. The mask was not his. Harry was wearing the self-loathing of another man, a man who disassociated from personal connections and found an embrace in hurting others. It was never Harry's mask to wear.

Harry should've never been caught between this game of Peter and Norman's.

God. What Norman had done to Harry sickened Peter. Some days, Peter would allow himself to think about the abuse Harry endured and how dehumanized Harry must've felt to put on that mask.

If Peter had done things differently with Harry, maybe... just maybe Harry would still be here. He'd be with his loving family. He could have dinner dates with Peter and MJ. That was his best friend. A man who stood for love which was lost in a game between two men who could only express themselves through their masks.

This inside joke of his... Peter told himself it so many times, it got stale. Maybe if he told Harry the punchline, Harry would still be here.

Peter knew it.