Soulless_Eyes_4

Okay, I decided to write the next part as fast as possible. Because I won't be able to go on the internet for the next months :-(
I loved to write this story, I hope you love to read it.
And please review, you make me really happy with it!




Soulless Eyes

by Kaeera




The voices....they are following me. I can hear people cry.

"Davis, please show me that you are there."

I am here. How shall I show this?

"Speak with me! Call me stupid, I don't mind, if I only can hear your voice again."

Can't you understand? I have to go through the black wall when I want to speak. The wall full of pain, full of the memories I want to forget.
No, you can't understand this.
Have you seen the images I have seen?
Have you felt the pain I have felt?
Have you had the fear I have had?
No, you haven't.

"You have to be strong."

I shall be strong?
I'm not strong. No, I am not. I feel like a helpless baby.

"Don't you remember me?"

Who?

"It's me, your sister."

My sister?

I won't listen. I want to forget. I WANT TO FORGET!

"I miss you."

........

"We all miss you."

Me?

"Mum and Dad miss you?"

Mum?.....Dad?

"Your friends miss you."

Friends?

"I miss you. And I need you."

You....miss me?
So there are people – on the other side of the wall – who miss me?
Who love me?

I forgot that.

Maybe...maybe I should try to reach them.

Slowly, I put my hand on the 'wall'. For the first time I touch my prison.

The pain catches me immediately.

I'm again in this room. Small and dark, I can only see shadows. But I know that they are there. I see the form of their bodies. Of their dead bodies.
I remember their names. Tony, a young man of the age 25. His wife Alexandra. They were in the same bus. Until the terrorists caught us.
This is one of the things I want to forget.
Tony's body fell limp to the ground. Alexandra cried and kneeled down at him, but she didn't cry for a long time. She was shot, too.
Then the two men took photos and left the prison.
I only remember that I stared at the tow bodies. For minutes, hours....days?
The eyes. Dead Eyes. Blood everywhere.
And the fear that the same could happen to me.
I didn't have enough tears to cry.
I just stared.
Even when they started to beat me, I didn't cry.
I didn't say anything.
I felt the salty bitter taste of blood in my mouth.
I saw the blood on my arms.
I was too weak to stand up – of hunger and of pain.
I tried close my soul deep inside of, the only thing which was left for me.
The only thing they couldn't reach.
And now I can't go out of my self-made prison.....>>

*


I'm here, lil'brother.

Again.

Do you know what day it is?

It's your birthday.

You are twelve years old. And you don't notice it.

This is the saddest birthday in my whole life. Usually we make a big party with masses of sweets and cakes. Then many people fill the small rooms of our flat. It's loud and the neighbours are angry about the noise.

No noise is here.

Nothing.

Just your eyes – these eyes which are scaring me like hell.

I noticed that I am frightened of looking directly into them. I am frightened of looking into your eyes? Shocking, but unfortunately the truth.
Do you remember when we always made 'Staring Duels' when we've been little?
I was always the winner – because after a minute other things caught your attention and you looked away. Every time when you lost again, you've been so angry!
I enjoyed it to watch your face then.
Now, with these eyes you would win every Duel.

Five Weeks.

Five damn long weeks.

In this time I noticed that I really love my family.

I watch my parents through different eyes now. Of course, I am still the rebellious teenager. And I am still a Motomiya, which means that I am noisy, hot-tempered, pigheaded, happy and a little bit crazy(only a little?).
But this whole mess brought out a new side of me.
A more serious one.

A Jun who thinks a lot. Nearly philosophical (Hey, who would mention the word 'philosophy' and Jun in one sentence?).

A Jun who cares about her brother.

Does Davis care for me? I think so. He will never show it, of course.
He would never show it.

Do you know what the Doc told me yesterday?

If there's no improvement during the next week, you will die.

Die.

You will slowly become weaker and thinner, although you are feed by the nurses every day.
And then, the last bit of your soul will leave your body.

I don't want to visit your tombstone, Davis.

I don't want to cry because you are an angel – somewhere.

You can't do that to me. We Motomiya's never give up! NEVER!

I'm not allowing you to go.

I squeeze your hand very hard. I want to keep my little brother.

And while the tears are streaming down my face, I yell the first words which come into my mind, without thinking.

"DAVIS YOU ARE SUCH A COWARD!", I start to sob, but that doesn't makes my voice softer. "What do you think, hey, leaving us like this! I bet you are just too frightened to fight! Hell, Davis, you are a fighter, you are a Motomyia....YOU ARE MY BROTHER!", my voice is cracking, "If you give up, you don't act like the Davis I know – you act like a looser!!!"

I know that I am very unfair, but I can't stop myself. Nobody can stop me when I am in rage.

'You have to be careful with him', the Doc said.

'Talk softly and calmly', she said.

'Show him that you care for him', she said.

'Show him that you love him', she said.

BANG! I slap his face, with all the power I have.

I look down on my red and hand, and notice that his cheek is becoming very red, too.
Slowly I realise what I have done. I have hit my brother! Of course, I hit him often, but not when he is ill! Am I mad? I made it all worse! I am so stupid!

I AM SO STUPID!

*

You are a coward!

Me? Why?
Who's calling me a coward?

I'm strong, I have always been...

But there's always a first time.

I hate it to be a coward.

You are a fighter!

Fighter?

You are my brother!

Jun?

I can hear you.

Jun, I am frightened.

Can't you make the pain away?

Why am I so alone? Why has it to be so cold and dark?

I'm here, Davis.

Jun!

Let me help you.

Help me....help me to flee my prison.
I wanted to forget, but I couldn't.

To forget isn't the right way.

But I can't live with the memories. They break me! They destroy me!

You have to deal with them. But you are not alone. Have faith!

What do you mean with that?

We all will help you through your pain. You only have to give us an opportunity.

Who exactly is 'We all'?

Mom and Dad. Me, your sister. Your friends. TK Kari, Yolei, Ken, Cody, Tai.....
Do you remember them?

Only some unclear pictures...

We all support you. We miss you. We want that you come back.

Really?

Yes.

Why?

Because we love you.

But I am too frightened. I'm afraid that I can't deal with it. No, I know that I can't deal with it!

You can.

How do you know?

Because you are strong.

Only some seconds before you called me a coward....

Well, you know my temper.

Yeah, I do....

You see? You are already joking a bit. You are strong, trust me.

I don't know....you really think I can manage it??

100%

Then maybe I should try it....

I'm sure you will make it.

What makes you so sure?

You are a Motomiya.

....?

And I am your big sister. I know everything.

Okay, okay, that explains everything....Jun?

Yes?

A last question...

Hurry.

How can you reach me? I mean, am I dreaming or how...I am deep in my body...

It's sort of a...dream. Strong wishes can bring out miracles. And, of course, the most important thing....

What?

I am a Motomiya, too.

*

"I am so sorry, Dai.", I whisper and look ashamed down on my hands. "I hate my hot temper!"

I feel so miserable. What shall I tell Mum and Dad?

I probably destroyed the last piece of hope we have had. Then I hear a noise.

Davis.

I can't believe it.

Lil'brother....was that you who moved his head?

It was you!

You turn your head and I see your eyes.

For the first time for five weeks these eyes aren't dead.

No, there is a soul inside! The soul of Davis, my brother!

I feel tears in my eyes, but this time they are tears of joy. "Davis....", I say with trembling voice. I can't believe it....that must be a dream....

"DAVIS!!", I yell and throw my arms around your neck!

I'm crying, but I can hear his soft voice in my ear.

"Jun?"


The End (Until I have the time to write the Epilogue)


Okay, Okay, the end is a bit lousy(okay, very lousy) but I am in a hurry.
I will write an epilogue for this, but I didn't want you to wait so long for a Happy end.*Isn't Kaeera nice to her readers*....
Okay, I am writing rubbish, just don't listen.
Maybe you can give me some ideas for my epilogue? TELL ME!
And, if you liked it, you can read some of my other stories...please? For those who love sad Davis stories with Happy End, I have 'Nameless'. *sighs* I bore you, I know.

Like always, thanks for reading, and please review!

Kaeera