Title: A Night Not To Be Forgotten
Author: Melissa
Rating: PG-13
Archive: Just email me first (themushroomkingdom@yahoo.com)
Author's Note: My 14th Andromeda fic. All I can say is "Wow, that's a LOT of fics for one person to write!" This is just another fic of pure silliness and stupidity from me while I work on my more serious pieces.
Disclaimer: Andromeda belongs to Tribune, not me.
"Rommie, do I have to go to the stupid reception?" Harper asked.
"We promised that our entire crew would be present, including you," Rommie said adamantly.
"Tell me again what's all gonna happen at this thing."
"There will be a formal dinner, followed by the Quentire's equivalent of a masquerade and the signing of the Commonwealth charter."
"So I need a costume?" Harper was not looking forward to this.
"It would be recommended." Rommie continued decorating Hydroponics.
Harper threw his arms in the air and groaned as he exited Hydroponics. He had never enjoyed wearing costumes, but even worse than that, he didn't know how to dance. 'I could make a fool of myself and no one but Rom-doll would know. Maybe I can throw together a costume that completely hides the fact that I'm me,' he thought. 'Yeah, I can make myself taller and use that thing I made when I was wired to change my voice.'
He hurried off to his quarters with a mission. After digging through his closet and looking under his bed, he found an extremely long black cape. It had been part of a Halloween prank years ago that he had forgotten about. He smiled when he remembered how scared Beka had been. She refused to talk to him for two full days before he tricked her into talking to him again. 'Those were the good days. No stupid receptions or dressing up. Just salvage operations and Beka, Rev and me,' he thought.
"I think I left that vocal processor in one of the Machine Shops," he muttered to himself as he threw the cape onto his bed.
He searched two Machine Shops before he found it. It wasn't quite finished, but all he needed to do was set it to a voice. "Something deep and sexy. Maybe I can use tonight to my advantage and find a hot girl..." He tested the processor to find it worked perfectly. He wired it to work when placed inside his data port, which he would hide with a high collar.
"Now all I need is to be taller. Maybe I could add a few inches to the bottoms of my shoes and stand up really straight. I know I can't do stilts." He grabbed one of his two pairs of dress shoes and figured out how to inconspicuously add five inches to them, using the cape to hide it.
"Now all I have to do is wait." He put on his regular formal suit and walked down to Hydroponics, unconsciously playing with his tie while he walked.
"You have to wear the tie this time, Harper," Rommie said. "Here, let me." She tied the tie around his neck and admired her work.
"Thanks, Rom-doll." He felt like he was being gradually choked and tugged at the tie to try to fix the problem. It only got tighter. "I hate dressing up," he mumbled.
Beka slowly walked in wearing a dress and high heels, evidently barely able to keep her balance. "This is the second time in the past two months I've had to do this. I told you once and now I'm telling you again, she's gonna have us doing this every other Thursday."
"Tell me about it. We aren't her freakin' mannequins." He plopped down in a chair. "At least we don't have to put up with stupid fish music this time."
"But who knows what the Quentire will bring? Dylan hasn't said anything about what they are or do." Beka carefully sat down in the chair nearest to him, watching to make sure her dress didn't get caught in anything.
Dylan entered Hydroponics with several aliens. They appeared human, their only distinguishing characteristic being elaborate sparkling tattoos around their right eyes.
"This is my first officer, Beka Valentine, and my engineer, Seamus Harper," Dylan said, gesturing at the pair.
"It is a pleasure to meet you," one of the Quentire said, whose eye tattoo was purple.
"Right back at ya," Harper said. "Nice tattoo. I'm sure Trance is gonna love it."
The Quentire smiled and moved next to Harper and Beka while Dylan gave a tour of Hydroponics to the others. "Miss Gemini was quite fond of it. I've never seen anyone like her before."
"Neither have we. She's pretty quiet about the mysteries of the sparkly purple people," Harper said.
"I found her on Amari Station selling flowers. She was looking for a job, and I offered her one," Beka added.
"Do you think she will attend our masquerade?" the Quentire asked.
"Trance loves dancing and having fun. She'll be there," Harper said.
"Good. I would like to talk to her. But now you must excuse me. Captain Hunt and the rest of my people are leaving." The Quentire hurried off.
"I think Trance has an admirer," Beka said with a smile.
"Now everybody's getting some except for me," Harper muttered.
"I think that girl in the back of the group was looking at you," Beka said. "You should talk to her."
"And have her tell me that I'm a freaky little pixie like the last one? Please!" He rested his head on his hand. "I've just gotta accept that it's totally hopeless for me." 'Which is why I'm not going to be me tonight,' he thought.
"I never thought I'd hear you say that. You finally agree with me, Harper," Beka said, patting him on the shoulder. "Well, I'm going to go talk to Dylan."
"'Kay," Harper said. He just stayed where he was and watched the Quentire. 'That girl isn't half bad. Actually, she's kinda hot,' he thought.
The dinner began with several kind toasts, even Tyr was civil to the Quentire. Everyone was sociable and seemed to be enjoying themselves, except for Harper. He was too busy thinking about the impending masquerade to concentrate on menial conversation.
"Let's prepare for the masquerade and convene here again in twenty minutes," the head of the Quentire said.
Everyone went towards their quarters or guest quarters to get ready. Harper was in hurry because his costume would take a while to dress in by himself. He started with completely black pants and a matching turtleneck shirt to hide his data port and the vocal processor he placed in it. He put the cape and shoes on and looked at himself in the mirror. His hair was too recognizable. He combed it down flat and put enough gel in it to make it seem black.
He needed something else to complete his costume. He suddenly remembered something he had seen in one of the cargo holds and cautiously ran to it. He completed his costume with a white three-quarters face mask. He was satisfied with his costume. Eighteen minutes had passed already, and he arrived almost exactly on time.
An eerie music was playing. Harper had to admit it was much better than the fish music of the Castalians, but it wasn't exactly his favorite punk rock band. He glanced around the room and saw what was evidently Trance, because it was impossible to hide her tail completely, and that Quentire he had talked to flirting and dancing. He spotted Rev Bem, who hadn't changed into a costume at all. Everyone else wasn't as easy to identify.
The music changed to a slower song. Couples began dancing, and he immediately felt out of place until he heard a soft purring behind him. He turned around to see a sparkly black cat, with a three-quarters face mask like his own, only it was the top three-quarters of her face. It was of about the same height and build of the Quentire girl he had been admiring before. He smiled.
He decided general Harper talk would scare her off and make her realize who he was. "Would you like to dance?"
She responded with a contented purr. He assumed she didn't want to talk, and he could live with that.
They started dancing. Harper was really enjoying it. His last dance had been when he was completely drunk. It was a lot better without the alcohol impairing his brain.
He moved closer to her. She purred happily and kissed him. If he hadn't been totally happy before, he was now. Before he had realized what was happening, she had pinned him against the nearest wall and her kisses became more of an attack than before. He just went with the flow. He had no idea the entire room was staring at them, though.
She suddenly stopped, and Harper realized someone had tapped her on the shoulder. "If you're going to continue this, would you please take it somewhere else? We as a people don't approve of public displays of affection."
"If you as a people don't approve of public displays of affection, what about her?" Harper asked.
"You mean you're not a Quentire?" the girl who had only purred before asked.
Harper recognized the voice and pulled off the mask. "Oh my god!"
She pulled down his collar and pulled out the voice processor. "Harper!"
"Beka!" He was in complete and utter shock.
They were silent for several seconds. Everyone seemed to be avoiding them purposely. They both knew they wouldn't hear the end of it after the Quentire left, though.
"So, ummmm, Bek...I didn't know you liked it rough," he said, raising an eyebrow at her.
"I didn't know you liked to screw your boss. You know, you have another one over there you can go make out with," she said bitterly.
"You don't have to be mad at me. After all, you were the one who came up to me purring and everything. I didn't know it was you."
"I don't want to be seen in public with you again." She was obviously humiliated as she walked away from him.
"It'll only take two days, and we'll be all buddy-buddy again. It never takes more than two days, even when I really piss her off," Harper said to himself. "But this is one night I'm not gonna forget for a very long time."
Author: Melissa
Rating: PG-13
Archive: Just email me first (themushroomkingdom@yahoo.com)
Author's Note: My 14th Andromeda fic. All I can say is "Wow, that's a LOT of fics for one person to write!" This is just another fic of pure silliness and stupidity from me while I work on my more serious pieces.
Disclaimer: Andromeda belongs to Tribune, not me.
"Rommie, do I have to go to the stupid reception?" Harper asked.
"We promised that our entire crew would be present, including you," Rommie said adamantly.
"Tell me again what's all gonna happen at this thing."
"There will be a formal dinner, followed by the Quentire's equivalent of a masquerade and the signing of the Commonwealth charter."
"So I need a costume?" Harper was not looking forward to this.
"It would be recommended." Rommie continued decorating Hydroponics.
Harper threw his arms in the air and groaned as he exited Hydroponics. He had never enjoyed wearing costumes, but even worse than that, he didn't know how to dance. 'I could make a fool of myself and no one but Rom-doll would know. Maybe I can throw together a costume that completely hides the fact that I'm me,' he thought. 'Yeah, I can make myself taller and use that thing I made when I was wired to change my voice.'
He hurried off to his quarters with a mission. After digging through his closet and looking under his bed, he found an extremely long black cape. It had been part of a Halloween prank years ago that he had forgotten about. He smiled when he remembered how scared Beka had been. She refused to talk to him for two full days before he tricked her into talking to him again. 'Those were the good days. No stupid receptions or dressing up. Just salvage operations and Beka, Rev and me,' he thought.
"I think I left that vocal processor in one of the Machine Shops," he muttered to himself as he threw the cape onto his bed.
He searched two Machine Shops before he found it. It wasn't quite finished, but all he needed to do was set it to a voice. "Something deep and sexy. Maybe I can use tonight to my advantage and find a hot girl..." He tested the processor to find it worked perfectly. He wired it to work when placed inside his data port, which he would hide with a high collar.
"Now all I need is to be taller. Maybe I could add a few inches to the bottoms of my shoes and stand up really straight. I know I can't do stilts." He grabbed one of his two pairs of dress shoes and figured out how to inconspicuously add five inches to them, using the cape to hide it.
"Now all I have to do is wait." He put on his regular formal suit and walked down to Hydroponics, unconsciously playing with his tie while he walked.
"You have to wear the tie this time, Harper," Rommie said. "Here, let me." She tied the tie around his neck and admired her work.
"Thanks, Rom-doll." He felt like he was being gradually choked and tugged at the tie to try to fix the problem. It only got tighter. "I hate dressing up," he mumbled.
Beka slowly walked in wearing a dress and high heels, evidently barely able to keep her balance. "This is the second time in the past two months I've had to do this. I told you once and now I'm telling you again, she's gonna have us doing this every other Thursday."
"Tell me about it. We aren't her freakin' mannequins." He plopped down in a chair. "At least we don't have to put up with stupid fish music this time."
"But who knows what the Quentire will bring? Dylan hasn't said anything about what they are or do." Beka carefully sat down in the chair nearest to him, watching to make sure her dress didn't get caught in anything.
Dylan entered Hydroponics with several aliens. They appeared human, their only distinguishing characteristic being elaborate sparkling tattoos around their right eyes.
"This is my first officer, Beka Valentine, and my engineer, Seamus Harper," Dylan said, gesturing at the pair.
"It is a pleasure to meet you," one of the Quentire said, whose eye tattoo was purple.
"Right back at ya," Harper said. "Nice tattoo. I'm sure Trance is gonna love it."
The Quentire smiled and moved next to Harper and Beka while Dylan gave a tour of Hydroponics to the others. "Miss Gemini was quite fond of it. I've never seen anyone like her before."
"Neither have we. She's pretty quiet about the mysteries of the sparkly purple people," Harper said.
"I found her on Amari Station selling flowers. She was looking for a job, and I offered her one," Beka added.
"Do you think she will attend our masquerade?" the Quentire asked.
"Trance loves dancing and having fun. She'll be there," Harper said.
"Good. I would like to talk to her. But now you must excuse me. Captain Hunt and the rest of my people are leaving." The Quentire hurried off.
"I think Trance has an admirer," Beka said with a smile.
"Now everybody's getting some except for me," Harper muttered.
"I think that girl in the back of the group was looking at you," Beka said. "You should talk to her."
"And have her tell me that I'm a freaky little pixie like the last one? Please!" He rested his head on his hand. "I've just gotta accept that it's totally hopeless for me." 'Which is why I'm not going to be me tonight,' he thought.
"I never thought I'd hear you say that. You finally agree with me, Harper," Beka said, patting him on the shoulder. "Well, I'm going to go talk to Dylan."
"'Kay," Harper said. He just stayed where he was and watched the Quentire. 'That girl isn't half bad. Actually, she's kinda hot,' he thought.
The dinner began with several kind toasts, even Tyr was civil to the Quentire. Everyone was sociable and seemed to be enjoying themselves, except for Harper. He was too busy thinking about the impending masquerade to concentrate on menial conversation.
"Let's prepare for the masquerade and convene here again in twenty minutes," the head of the Quentire said.
Everyone went towards their quarters or guest quarters to get ready. Harper was in hurry because his costume would take a while to dress in by himself. He started with completely black pants and a matching turtleneck shirt to hide his data port and the vocal processor he placed in it. He put the cape and shoes on and looked at himself in the mirror. His hair was too recognizable. He combed it down flat and put enough gel in it to make it seem black.
He needed something else to complete his costume. He suddenly remembered something he had seen in one of the cargo holds and cautiously ran to it. He completed his costume with a white three-quarters face mask. He was satisfied with his costume. Eighteen minutes had passed already, and he arrived almost exactly on time.
An eerie music was playing. Harper had to admit it was much better than the fish music of the Castalians, but it wasn't exactly his favorite punk rock band. He glanced around the room and saw what was evidently Trance, because it was impossible to hide her tail completely, and that Quentire he had talked to flirting and dancing. He spotted Rev Bem, who hadn't changed into a costume at all. Everyone else wasn't as easy to identify.
The music changed to a slower song. Couples began dancing, and he immediately felt out of place until he heard a soft purring behind him. He turned around to see a sparkly black cat, with a three-quarters face mask like his own, only it was the top three-quarters of her face. It was of about the same height and build of the Quentire girl he had been admiring before. He smiled.
He decided general Harper talk would scare her off and make her realize who he was. "Would you like to dance?"
She responded with a contented purr. He assumed she didn't want to talk, and he could live with that.
They started dancing. Harper was really enjoying it. His last dance had been when he was completely drunk. It was a lot better without the alcohol impairing his brain.
He moved closer to her. She purred happily and kissed him. If he hadn't been totally happy before, he was now. Before he had realized what was happening, she had pinned him against the nearest wall and her kisses became more of an attack than before. He just went with the flow. He had no idea the entire room was staring at them, though.
She suddenly stopped, and Harper realized someone had tapped her on the shoulder. "If you're going to continue this, would you please take it somewhere else? We as a people don't approve of public displays of affection."
"If you as a people don't approve of public displays of affection, what about her?" Harper asked.
"You mean you're not a Quentire?" the girl who had only purred before asked.
Harper recognized the voice and pulled off the mask. "Oh my god!"
She pulled down his collar and pulled out the voice processor. "Harper!"
"Beka!" He was in complete and utter shock.
They were silent for several seconds. Everyone seemed to be avoiding them purposely. They both knew they wouldn't hear the end of it after the Quentire left, though.
"So, ummmm, Bek...I didn't know you liked it rough," he said, raising an eyebrow at her.
"I didn't know you liked to screw your boss. You know, you have another one over there you can go make out with," she said bitterly.
"You don't have to be mad at me. After all, you were the one who came up to me purring and everything. I didn't know it was you."
"I don't want to be seen in public with you again." She was obviously humiliated as she walked away from him.
"It'll only take two days, and we'll be all buddy-buddy again. It never takes more than two days, even when I really piss her off," Harper said to himself. "But this is one night I'm not gonna forget for a very long time."