Chapter 9: Alone in the Basement

Derek mumbled under his breath as he hurried down the stairs towards his office. He had repeated over and over to his new secretary that under no circumstances was he to be bothered during his important meeting. The only exception was if there was a family emergency, if Carwyn was sick or hurt. This last thought caused Derek's blood to race faster.

"I'm so sorry, sir. She made me page you… I told her I wasn't supposed to…." The panicked secretary's voice faltered as her eyes met the out of breath doctor's wide concerned ones.

"Who's she? Is Carwyn okay?" Derek asked impatiently.

"Oh! Yes, Dr. Shepherd. Carwyn's fine…. It's just…" The secretary replied, her eyes darting from him to his office, still worried about something.

"Then what is it?" Derek rubbed the bridge of his nose, growing impatient with each word.

"Um… it's your…um"

Still not understanding, Derek followed her eyes to the open door of his office and stepped over to see what she was referring to. Derek pushed the door open more, still confused, furrowing his brows until they rested on the last person he expected.

"Mom!"

"Derek, there you are. You know that secretary of yours made me wait ten minutes! Ten minutes! It's a sad day when a mother has to be put on her son's schedule for a visit." She stood from the chair she waited in, and crossed the room, keeping her face serious. It wasn't until she stood less than two feet away from Derek, that her face split and her eyes sparked. She smiled wide as she held her arms open to her only son.

"I'm sorry mom. I wasn't expecting you." Derek pulled away and looked down into his mother's warm face. She had several new wrinkles; her hair was now completely gray. The last six years aged her tremendously. "What are you doing here mom?

"What did you expect son? For the last five years, you're this depressed, miserable man who won't come out to visit his family, you don't return phone calls, basically cut your family and friends off. Hell, we pegged you as suicidal; your sisters even had wages on how you'd end up taking your life." She shook her head, apparently not at all approving of his sisters' bet. She continued before Derek could respond. "Then, one day I get a message on my machine. My long-lost son, your voice cheerful and happy, saying something about how things in life have dramatically changed and for the first time in so long you've found love and peace. That's it. No details, no further explanation. What did you expect me to think? To do, Derek? I tried calling your trailer, but I was told the number was disconnected. I tried your office but that one didn't work as well. I finally called Addison, who informed me it wasn't her place to tell what's going on, I should come find out for myself. So, I'm here. Tell me, Derek. What is going on?"

Derek laughed and shook his head. "I'm sorry mom. I meant to call again, but things just got so busy. I had the trailer's utilities turned off because I haven't stayed there in a while and… I have a new office." Derek gestured to the room they currently stood in. "I got chief." Derek smiled proudly, but that wasn't the good news he was dying to share with his mother.

"So… you got Chief? Now all of a sudden life is grand, you're happy, and you've found love. Because you got Chief?" Derek's mother asked skeptically.

"No! No, that's not it at all." Derek ran a hand through his hair, debating how he should break the rest of the news to his mother. Finally making up his mind, he smiled and looked down at her, his eyes now shining. "Come with me mom. I want to show you something."

Derek turned and headed down the hallway, his mother right beside him, following curiously. Derek glanced at his watch and knew Meredith would be finding him soon for lunch, so he didn't bother paging her.

The two Shepherds walked down the corridor, crossed the tall bridge, and went down a floor in the elevator before stopping in front the daycare center. Derek turned again towards his mother, unable to hide his excitement as she furrowed her brows at him.

"Derek, what on earth is going on? I've never seen you act so… so…. giddy?"

Derek laughed out loud at his mother's choice of words. But he didn't argue. He figured that was a good way to describe how he was feeling at the moment.

Without saying a word, he opened the door and led his mother inside. She looked around the room confused before turning back to question Derek.

Derek immediately spotted Carwyn in the kitchen play center, the obvious favorite part of her school, and turned proudly to his mom. "Mom, there's someone I'd like you to meet."

Before Derek could go on, they both turned at the small, excited voice that rang through the room.

"Daddy!"

Carwyn raced across the room, her dark curls bouncing across her shoulders, and into Derek's outstretched arms. He swung her up and around one time before settling her in his arms and turning towards his mom, who now stood speechless, her mouth slightly opened in shock.

"Mom, I'd like you to meet your Granddaughter, Carwyn. Carwyn…. This is your grandma; can you say hello?" Carwyn buried her face in Derek's neck, shyness getting the better of the young girl.

Derek's mother looked on, still unable to speak. Tears shone in her eyes as she watched her only son, a man she had worried and stewed over for so many years, hold the most beautiful little girl tenderly in his arms. There was no mistaking she was his; her dark hair and expressive eyes identical to Derek. She noticed Carwyn was a lot thinner and petite than any of her own children was, and her mind filled with questions. She wasn't sure where to begin.

"Hello Carwyn. I'm your Nana. Can I see your beautiful face?" She spoke quietly, trying to lure her out of hiding in the crook of Derek's neck.

Derek whispered something soothing in his daughter's ear, she retreated from her hiding space, and looked cautiously at the older woman.

"Well, that's much better sweetheart. Look at you, you are absolutely perfect." Her voice cracked and she became choked up. She swallowed a few times and wiped at a tear that stole down her weathered cheek before continuing. This time speaking to Derek. "Would you care to explain, how you suddenly have a daughter?"

Derek nodded and pressed his lips against Carwyn's forehead as he contemplated the best way to explain everything that happened over the last five years.

"Let me buy you lunch, and we can talk there." Derek suggested to his mom, then put a finger under Carwyn's chin and tilted her head so she was looking up at him. "Carwyn, do you want to come to lunch with me and Nana?"

Carwyn nodded, glancing shyly towards her new Grandmother as she wrapped her small arms around Derek's neck and rested her head on his shoulder. She kept her small blue eyes on the older woman, wary that she might get too close.

Derek chuckled. "Don't worry mom. She's very shy until she gets to know you. She'll be chatting your ear off before you know it." He then crossed the room to one of Carwyn's teachers and explained he was borrowing his daughter for a couple of hours for lunch, and she'd be back later. The teacher nodded and Derek, with Carwyn still clinging tightly to his neck, led his mother out of the daycare center and towards the cafeteria.

"There's one more person I want you to meet mom. She should be around here somewhere." Derek led the way as they weaved in and out of doctors, nurses, patient's families, and hospital staff until they found an empty table on the patio. He pulled out a plastic chair for his mother before trying to settle Carwyn in her own. His daughter still refused to release the tight grip she had, so he conceded and kept her on his lap as he lowered himself across from his mom.

"Do you mind if we wait for Meredith before getting our food?" Derek asked as he shifted Carwyn on his lap, trying to loosen the death grip she still maintained.

"Meredith?" His mother raised her eyes quizzically.

Derek nodded, the same happy, almost amazed, look taking over his features again. "Yeah, Meredith." Derek said, unable to stop the large grin that spread across his face. "She's Carwyn's mother, and my…well, she's my girlfriend… but so much more than that, Mom. So much more. She's my everything. My happily ever after. I can't wait for you to meet her."

Derek was beaming and his mother could not remember the last time she'd seen him in such good spirits. She felt like she was sitting across from a different man. His features had matured in the last six years, but as he talked about this woman he loved so much, his mother noticed something youthful spread across his demeanor.

"So… this Meredith… does she work here too? Is she a doctor?" She wanted to know everything about this woman who rescued her son from his depression.

"Yeah, she's a doctor. I don't know if you remember… when I first came to Seattle, right after I'd found Addie and Mark…." Derek shook his head, still not able to finish that sentence even though he was long over it, "and I met a woman, and we had a thing?" Derek knew all his sisters had heard the story from Addison but wasn't sure if it had ever gotten back to his mother.

"This is the same woman?" His mother asked surprised.

Derek nodded smiling. "It wasn't just a thing, we had. I fell in love with her. I fell, irreversibly, head over heels in love with her. I honestly never felt the way for Addie, as I do for Meredith. I tried, man I tried to make it work with Addie. But I couldn't. I know we told everyone the divorce was because we grew apart and were different people then who we were when we married. The truth is… I couldn't get over Meredith. Working with her and being friends just wasn't enough for me. I knew it was her I wanted to spend the rest of my life with." Derek sat back and ran his hand absentmindedly up and down Carwyn's back.

Derek's mother knew there was much more to the story. Five years more to be exact, but she didn't want to push, not yet. "So… Meredith." She smiled, her eyes twinkling.

"Mhm. Meredith Grey." Mostly repeating her name for the mere reason of the way he loved how it sounded.

His mother's eyebrows shot upward, and a worried expression crossed her face. "Meredith Grey, you said?"

"Yes." Derek furrowed his brows.

"Oh, Derek." His mother shook her head, trying to tell herself that by some rare chance that had not been the name the woman from earlier had. She tried to deny it as she pushed it around her head. Maybe she had said her name was Seredith Fray, or even Geredith Hey. But no, she knew it was the same woman.

"What mom?" Derek asked growing concerned as his mother's features turned into alarm.

"I… I think I already met her." His mother said slowly, still trying to recall exactly what they said to each other earlier.

"What do you mean mom?" A knot was starting to grow in Derek's stomach, leaving him uneasy and afraid of her answer.

"Earlier…. at your office…. when I was waiting for you. There was another woman there before me. I didn't recognize her or couldn't have even imagined who she was Derek. She said she recognized me from a picture. I didn't give it a second thought. She introduced herself and I blew her off. I had no idea who she was, I'm so sorry!"

Derek's face visibly paled. This couldn't be happening. "Are you sure it was her mom?" Derek's voice was thin, scared.

"I'm so sorry son, if I'd only knew…." His mother shook her head, she now felt awful at how she had brushed off the woman who was the mother of her new granddaughter.

Derek sat motionless. His mother was apologizing because she felt bad for treating Meredith so coolly. That wasn't half the problem. Of course, Meredith had expected that he'd told his mother about her, about Carwyn. And he had meant to. He honestly had. He just hadn't expected his mother to show up in Seattle, nonetheless, run into Meredith before he had a chance to explain everything.

He sighed and looked at his phone. No wonder she hadn't called or made an attempt to find him. He knew Meredith well enough to know that she was as far away as she could get from him, feeling very hurt, and even worse, angry. Derek knew he was screwed.

Meredith sat in a long dark hallway down in the basement. Years ago, she and her intern friends had claimed this gurney as their own. Their private little spot to get away from the nonstop pace of being an underdog. Now she sat alone. How things had changed in the five years she was gone. It was as if life had blown by in fast forward for the rest of the world, only to have been stuck on pause for herself. Sometimes she thought fate was unfair, cruel even.

Meredith wiped stubbornly at a single tear that dared to escape her watery green eyes. She wasn't going to cry. She wasn't going to dwell on the fact that Derek had failed to mention her to his mother. Probably even failed to tell his mother he was now a father as well. She wasn't going to dwell on the fact that in the last two weeks, two creepy notes were found in her locker. Most importantly, she wasn't going to dwell on the fact that something inside her screamed Danger! every time Mr. Luckabee was within a few feet of her.

Nope, she was going to sit alone in the dark, and think of nothing. Stare at the sterile white wall in front of her and pretend she didn't exist, if only for a few more minutes. She knew rationally it was only a matter of time before her pager would go off, ending her solitude in the temporary refuge. For now, she'd take any faux tranquility she was able to cling to.

Meredith's blank stare was interrupted by an unidentifiable noise to her right. She stared down the hall, studying the dark corners and shadows until she was almost positive someone was there.

"Hello?" Meredith's voice echoed down the corridor, bouncing off the bare walls and tiled floors.

When no one answered Meredith tried again. "Hello? Alex? George?" She knew they were both known to frequent the old hangout.

When still her inquire was met with silence, fear began to creep inside her for the second time that day. She shook her head, determined to not let her imagination get the best of her and slid off the gurney. It was probably a janitor, or maybe a doctor from the morgue was walking around. It could be anyone. She walked cautiously toward the sound, doing her best to stand straight and still her shaking hands.

Then, she saw it. A shadow moved. Someone was there.

"Hey!" Meredith called out again, turning her slow steps to a more determined jog.

The shadow disappeared suddenly, and Meredith heard a sound like someone tripping over something, followed by quick, retreating footsteps.

Annoyance mixed with Meredith's fear, giving her enough adrenaline to pursue the mystery who was hiding in the shadows watching her. Her soft, hurried footsteps trailed the heavier, sharper ones. She turned corners and ran through halls she didn't even know existed. The slamming of a door caused her to come to a stop outside of the stairwell.

Meredith's breathing was heavy and sweat dripped from both temples, but she pulled the heavy door open anyways. She walked in and promptly glanced up. The footsteps quickly faded away and disappeared altogether as they escaped without being seen, out the first-floor door. There was no use continuing her pursuit. Whoever it was more than likely vanished into the mist of doctors, nurses, and visitors hurrying to and from the main lobby.

Meredith sat defeated on the bottom step to catch her breath. There was no way she imagined that. Someone was watching her and frantically ran away to not be identified. Meredith wrapped her own arms around herself as she shivered. She wasn't cold. She was scared. For the first time in her life, Seattle Grace didn't hold the protection and sense of security it had always offered. Sitting on the cold hard cement step, alone in the bottom of the stairwell, Meredith felt ten times more alone than only minutes before. She couldn't tell Cristina; her best friend would think she was crazy. George, she knew, would overreact. Izzie would freak out and tell Alex, who would threaten to beat up anyone who got too close. Meredith shook her head. She definitely couldn't tell Derek. He was already so distant and overwhelmed with his new promotion, this would probably only make things worse. Besides, she wasn't sure if she was talking to Derek.

There wasn't anyone she could tell about this. She'd have to figure out who was trying to scare her, and why, all by herself. All alone. She would do everything possible to keep Carwyn and herself safe.