Bella had come looking for a box Alice asked her to bring her from her bedroom when she came across him.
Jasper .
All things considered she should have expected to find him here.
But to be fair she had thought him to be out hunting with Emmett and Edward.
He wasn't.
And he looked like a deer caught in the headlights as he stared at her. He was laying on the bed with a book resting on his chest for support.
-Uhm, hi, sorry, I didn't knew you were here.- Her words seemed to pull him out of whatever trance he was in because he flipped the book shut and abandoned it on the bed in order to get to the window in a flash.
Even past the hurt of his obvious avoidance of her she couldn't help the flicker of confusion as she saw him open the window before slamming it back shut when the sunlight leaked in. Bathing the bedroom once again in near darkness.
In fact.
There was cardboard on the glass now that she noticed.
Still.
That wasn't important right now. What was important here was the look he was giving to the door.
And against her better judgement she blocked the door before he could even think about using his vampiric speed to get away from her.
Ever since the incident from last week he had been avoiding her, and she hated it.
A sudden thought occurred to her.
Had Alice sent her here on purpose? In fact. Thinking better of it, how come had Alice forgotten to get a box filled with hair clips she had gotten especially for Bella's hair?
-Sit down, please.- She asked hoping against hope that he would listen.
A moment of hesitation and then he sat down. She couldn't help but turn the light on as she stepped in completely. God she didn't remember Alice's room being so dark last time she was here.
She circling the bed in order to come to stand before him. He watched her like a hawk. His eyes weren't red anymore but a strangely pretty shade of orange.
-You do realize we spoke about this before right?- Began Bella as she crossed her arms over her chest. She had started training herself to not budge under his stare. If she was gonna become one of them and have him as her brother she refused to let him intimidate her.- I'm not mad and I know perfectly well that what happened wasn't your fault.
Silence was her answer.
And then he ducked his head.
-I'm not someone you should trust to be near, at least not while you're still human.
Not that she would trust being anywhere near him when she became a newborn.
As a human she had seen nothing but a handful of his scars. The deeper ones. She couldn't even see the ones on his face, neck or hands. How actually marred in scars were his arms.
But once she became a vampire she would acquire their sight.
And she would see him for the scarred monster he was.
Still.
He wasn't expecting her to grab his shoulders with such roughness.
-If I could slap you I would do it, see if that way I can unclog your ears. This wasn't your fault. I'm the one who went and sneaked up on you. Alright? You may not trust yourself near me but I trust you. You are my friend, no, you are my brother and I won't stand for this self-loathing if I can have a say in it.
-Your birthday party-
-Let's not bring that one up alright?- She cut him off. That whole ordeal could have been avoided or at least been less violent if she had covered her finger right away instead of showing her blood to them all.
Or if Edward hadn't pushed her with such force in his panic and made her bleed even more.
-I hurt you.
-And you fixed my arm up.
-But-
-Have you ever hurt any of the Cullens?
Bella's question caught Jasper off guard and he couldn't help but avoid her gaze in shame.
-You didn't meet me when I first arrived. I couldn't even stand being 'round the Cullens themselves 'cause it felt too overwhelmin'. I was ready to tear 'em all apart at the slightest sign of danger. Or at least whatever I deemed dangerous at the time. There was a time where I wouldn't have hesitated to break your arms for the single fact that you're touchin' me.
Bella for her side wasn't expecting that answer. She couldn't imagine Jasper hurting the Cullens. He sounded like he had been too skittish. Edward's words flashed in her mind.
"Maria... She wasn't a good person."
"She relinquished on exploiting and torturing her newborns in any way she could."
"When Jasper first arrived... He was aggressive."
"He's even bitten some of us more than once."
Bella still had a hard time believing someone could be so bad towards someone as good natured as Jasper.
-But that doesn't matter now. You have changed and yeah, it hurt, but I'm fine now, see?- She told pulling at her sleeve to show him her half healed scratch. It was in scabs now.- Either way it's my choice and I choose to be around you.
-You're human. You need blood to survive. We're vampires and we hold no blood in us aside from the one we consume. We won't bleed to death.
Well, he could bleed to death.
But Bella didn't need to know that. No one at all.
-God you are worse than Edward, is it a vampire thing to be so stubborn?
He bristled at the comparison before huffing.
-We ain't being stubborn. At least I'm not. I'm being logical.
-To hell with being logical!- Bella snapped losing her patience and taking a step back. She felt a wave of calm washing her anger and she gave him a dirty look.
The calm stopped.
-Sorry.
Bella ran her hands through her hair collecting her thoughts and herself in general.
-Look, all I'm asking is for you to stop avoiding me alright? I promise I will be more careful in the future just... please don't avoid me anymore, I don't want us to go back to not interacting at all.
Her pain made Jasper's chest constrict and he couldn't help but avoid her gaze. Guilt swirling inside his chest.
Edward had told him. Bella wouldn't be happy about his avoidance. Alice told him. Bella would be hurt.
But what was he suppose to do?
He tried to bite her once and now he scratched her.
What if next time he ended up killing her?
He couldn't risk that.
But he also didn't want to be reason for her to be upset.
What to do then?
A thought occurred to him.
Ah.
He knew how to protect her. At least to an extent.
It was a bit stupid, how he hadn't thought it sooner.
But if he did this he would have to be extra careful for he wouldn't be able to use compulsion on her ever again. If he got found he wouldn't be able to manipulate her into forgetting.
~~~~~~~~~
Finding vervain was harder than Jasper had first expected. And while he could have bought it he didn't want to risk this one turning up to be fake. He had no time to wait for a tea that could end up being fake or having stuff mixed with it. Useless stuff.
He needed it pure and absolute.
Thus he looked for it himself.
Gloves and a mask to help him turn it into tea of course.
It took him more than what he was willing to admit to even find it though.
Still.
He found it.
Working with it in Esme's kitchen was a bit challenging and he also had to use kitchen gloves for it but he managed.
The smell burnt at his throat even past the mask as he poured the hot water but it wasn't something he couldn't work with. That was nothing compared to having it shoved down his throat.
After finishing making the tea he took the gloves and mask off and with a cautious hold he took the cup to Bella along with some crackers so it wouldn't look too suspicious. He knew she was in Edward's bedroom doing homework. Had been for a while now.
He wasn't sure if she liked tea but he was sure of one thing.
She wouldn't turn him down. And if she did he could always manipulate her into drinking it. He wasn't a fan of manipulating people but this was for her safety.
He heard her groan and felt her frustration. The door wide open and as he came to stand at the doorframe a pen hit him straight on the chest. Surprise flickered in the air.
-Oh God Jasper I'm so sorry. I didn't-
-Bella. A pen will hardly do anythin' against me.- He cut her off as he came to stand before her. Handing her the plate of crackers and the tea.
He didn't miss her disgust at the weird looking liquid.
-Tea's helpful. You should take a break and eat somethin'. You haven't eaten anythin' since lunch right?
Jasper knew he had her when he said that and she gave him a huff. He picked the pen up from the floor and brought it back to her, sitting on the bed.
He took one of Bella's books and laid back on the bed. Holding it up and half reading it, though his attention was more on the cup of tea so as to make sure Bella would drink it all.
Vervain held such a distinctive scent to him he had grown to smell it even in the humans who consumed it. If she smelt like that her blood would no longer be appetizing and even if he was to bite her he wouldn't drink her blood. He would be forced to stop at the first sip as the poison invaded his system.
She would be safe.
And as far as he was aware poisonous vampires didn't got affected by it which meant there would be no issues for when Edward finally turned her.
It was a win-win.
-Did you really meet a black blood?- Bella's sudden question made him tense for a moment before lowering the book and looking at her in confusion.
How did a human from modern times heard about black bloods? As far as he knew humans had long ago merged the black bloods and poisonous vampires into one. Over a thousand legends but at the end it was the same. Just one kind of vampire.
-I read a book from Carlisle's studio and asked Emmett about it.- Bella clarified at the look she was getting.
-Why would you think that I met one?
-Emmett told me about The Major, did a vampire that cruel really exist?
-He did.- Jasper conceded avoiding her gaze. Great. So now Bella knew about black bloods and The Major.
-Is it true? All from that book I mean. Shapeshifting, hypnosis, the sun, the fangs, the blood.
-Yes. It's all true.- He didn't felt comfortable with the route this conversation was taking.
-Emmett said he drove a stake through his heart.
Oh, how Jasper sometimes wished that he had actually done so.
-He did. Can we not talk about that?- He requested giving her a pleading look.
-Of course, I'm sorry, that was insensitive.- Bella was quick to apologize, Emmett did told her that despite all Jasper never took well to people speaking ill of that particular vampire.
-No, it's fine, I just... He was a good friend... sort of.
"Sort of? Friends? We're more than that, we're lac carrots an' peas."
Jasper snorted at that. Sometimes he couldn't understand The Major's moods at all. He could be civil the same as he could become the worst morally biased being to ever walk the Earth.
It took him a moment to remember he wasn't alone but Bella didn't even look at him. She was frowning at the wall deep in thought as she took a sip from her tea.
-Hi!- Alice's sudden voice made both Bella and Jasper jump. She was quick to walk up to Jasper and take the book from him before grabbing his hands.- I changed my mind, let's go hunting.
Jasper frowned but did as told as he let Alice pull him up from the bed.
-Eat and drink it all, I'll know if you didn't.- He warned Bella as he threw her a look over his shoulder.
-Sure.
It wasn't until both Alice and Jasper were at a safe distance that Alice spoke.
-You can't talk with her about the black bloods again. If I hadn't interrupted she would have figured it out.
-Figured- How? I didn't give her reasons to figure anythin' out.- Jasper frowned. Alice gave him a look.
-Jazz, we are talking about Bella , same human who figured out our secret within a week.
-... Good point.
-You have to be careful.- Alice told him. She wasn't sure how would Bella react to Jasper being a black blood and while she would be the perfect person to keep a secret that didn't mean that if she was to take things bad it wouldn't go bad for them.
-I know.
Even if Jasper said that he couldn't help but wonder if at this point in life it was worth it to keep hiding. The longer he hid the worse the impact could be.
But was he willing to lose this family?
No.
He wasn't.