She took his outstretched hand in hers, and looked
up into his face. So many thoughts going
through her head, so many memories - her father
pushing her on a swing, eating ice cream on
a hot summer's day, the two of them laughing, and
the day he left. That one stood out the
most, and all of those feelings filled her heart
with a pain that was as fresh as the day he
left. It was as though she was an abandoned
child once again.
Tom sensed her sadness and lifted her hand to his
lips to place a soft kiss upon it, trying
to bring her back to the present.
"You okay?"
"Yeah...I think so. It was just so...I don't
know. I mean to see him again after all this
time..." her thoughts trailed off again as two ensigns
walked passed them in the hallway.
Sensing her need for privacy and her need to talk,
he said "Why don't we go back to our
quarter's for a little while? I'll replicate
us some tea, and we can talk for a while.
What do you say?"
"I wish I could, Tom, but I have to go back to Engineering."
"You don't look like you're up to being the 'Chief' right now. "
"I'm fine...I mean I'll be fine. I just need to get back to work."
"Are you sure, B'Elanna? I don't think the
Captain would mind if we took a little break
before heading back to work. I know the Doctor
would recommend you taking a little down
time after something so obviously...painful."
"It wasn't painful, Tom. It was...it...it just wasn't painful! Okay?!"
"Okay." He could tell she wasn't ready to talk
yet, but he would be there for her when she
was ready. He silently vowed, once again,
to always be there for her.
"I'll see you later." She said and headed off.
Returning to sick bay, Tom felt a little heavy hearted,
knowing what his wife was going
through, knowing the effect the absence of her father
had caused her over the years, Tom
wasn't sure if he would be able to wait until she
was ready to let him in, but he would
try. He knew it would be easier for her if
she was ready to talk about it, then to force
her into it, so he would wait, but not for too long.
"Well Mr. Paris...it's about time you got here. I have several ideas about the re-write."
The Doctor had recently penned a holo-novel loosely
based on the Voyager crew - very loosely
based. The Chief Engineer was a woman that
looked considerably like B'Elanna without any
Klingon traits, the first officer had a tattoo covering
half of his face, the Chief Helmsman
acted like an olden day rogue, married to one woman
(suspiciously...the Chief Engineer) yet
romancing every other woman he could get his hands
on. Tom couldn't imagine the thought of
ever being unfaithful to his wife, of course he
could never imagine himself with a dark head
of hair and a moustache, but the Doctor seemed to
visualize it all too clearly. These
"loosely based" characterizations caused quite a
bit of disturbances throughout the crew,
which prompted the re-write, the Doctor spoke of.
"I'd like to get started as soon as possible."
"Sure Doc. Have a great time on the holodeck...and
Doc."
"Yes Mr. Paris."
"Lose the moustache, will ya?"
With that the Doctor left for the holodeck to complete
his "work of art".
Tom spent an uneventful hour in sickbay when the doors swished open and his wife walked in.
"Hey" she said softly.
"Hey" he said grabbing his medical tricorder and
immediately starting a scan on her and
their daughter.
She smiled wistfully and said "Tom...I'm fine.
I just wanted to talk."
"Oh." He thought how far they had come since
they first admitted their love for each
other. It's taking a lot less time these days
to admit when one needed the other.
"What's on your mind?" he said trying to lighten
the mood a bit.
"My father."
"Here...come on over and sit down. Do you
want a cup of tea or something?"
"No. I just need you for a little while.
Is that alright?" she asked sheepishly.
"You don't even have to ask. I'm always going
to be here for you, whenever you need me." he
said as they walked over to a biobed and sat down.
"I know. Maybe I forgot for a while..." both
of them remembering her reaction to finding
out their daughter would be born with forehead ridges.
An obvious sign of her Klingon
heritage.
"...But I do know that you'll always be there for
our daughter. And me" she continued.
"Tom, my father...he...well...he's a good father.
That is he was a good father until the
day he left my mother and me. That was the
most painful day of my childhood. I think back
to all of the fights my mother and I had, all of
the disputes, of how I was nothing but a
disappointment to 'our Klingon ancestors', because
I was joining the Starfleet Academy -
God, I was sure she hated me then - but even all
of that didn't cause me as much pain as the
day my father left us. He ripped out my heart
that day, and until you I wasn't sure I still
had one left."
He wanted to tell her that she always had a heart,
otherwise she wouldn't have joined the
Maquis cause, but sensing her need to talk he let
her continue without interruption.
"When I saw him today on that view screen it was
like I was 5 all over again, and my daddy
was there for me. I want so much to let him
back in, to be his little girl, but I'm so
afraid of being hurt again, of him hurting our daughter.
I would never let him hurt her
that way."
"Maybe...you should take it slowly, B'Elanna.
Look, today was the first time you spoke to
him in how many years? No one expects you
to just open up your heart and let him back in
just like that."
"Yeah. I guess you're right."
"B'Elanna, why not write to him and see what happens."
"Do you think he'll write back?"
"Well...he did send you a message saying he wanted
to talk to you, and he did seem pretty
sincere in wanting to get to know you again."
"He did didn't he?"
"Yeah...he did."
"Well...I guess I'll write to him then."
"I guess so, and as far as our daughter is concerned...we
have a long time before anyone,
other than her mommy and daddy, are going to be
close enough to even hold her. Well...maybe
the Doctor, him being the Godfather and all."
"Oh you think so, huh?" She said feeling much
more at ease now.
"You think I'm going to let just anyone hold her?
No way."
"I think you might have a problem with Chakotay
and the Captain there, Tom."
"Well this is the one area of this ship that you
and I will be in command of, and nothing
they say or do can change that."
"Oh, I don't know...the Captain could order you
to let her carry the baby."
They both chuckled at the thought of the Captain
and Chakotay trying to order Tom into
letting them hold their daughter.
"All kidding aside, B'Elanna...I'll never let anyone
hurt our daughter, or you." he said as
he placed his hand on her face and made her look
into his eyes.
As he leaned in to place a kiss on her lips he whispered,
"I love you...both."
"We love you too."
He placed his warm lips over hers and kissed her
lightly, stroking her face and looking into
her eyes while he kept on kissing her over and over.
"Well...isn't this nice. Mr. Paris pleases
stops performing a tonsillectomy on your wife in
my sick bay."
Tom and B'Elanna barely pulled apart to acknowledge
the Doctors, untimely arrival, and
resumed kissing for a few more seconds.
"Perhaps the two of you would like me to leave?"
He said as he took his seat in his office,
obviously not planning on going anywhere.
"No that's okay Doc, but thanks for the offer."
"Well...I have to go back to engineering.
I'll see you later, and thanks...Mr. Paris.," she
said in her best "Doctor" voice.
"No thanks necessary...Mrs. Paris." He'd been
trying that name out on her more and more
often lately, secretly hoping that she would eventually
succumb to it.
Whispering in his ear she said "Have I told
you how much it turns me on when you call me
that?" giving him a look that he knew all to well,
she pecked his cheek, and was off to
Engineering.
He wasn't sure exactly how turned on it made her,
but he was definitely going to find out
tonight.
The End