The young man walked up the hill and knocked on the castle's gate. A hatch slid open.
"Yeesss?" a butlery voice asked. The young man stared though.
"Why have you got a helmet on under your wig?" he asked.
"Oh bugger. What do you want?" the voice changed to that of a young man.
"The king was advertising for an assistant?" the young man asked.
"Yes, you'd better come in then. By the way, I'm Shaun Ogg. Who are you?"
"Peter." he replied.
"Just, Peter?"
"Yes."
Shawn shrugged and opened the door.
"The king is around here somewhere, let's see if we can find him."
Peter had a guided tour of the Throne Room, dining room, various halls and passageways before

they finally tracked down the king to the small room he was using as an office.
"Heya boss, this guy came about the job?" Shawn said, and closed the door behind him. Verence the second, King of Lancre looked up.
"I know I wanted him to stop playing that blasted trumpet, but..."
He stood up and offered his hand. Peter shook it gravely.
"Now, the job. What I need is someone to read any correspondence that comes in, deal with what he can, and generally help me run the kingdom. Do you think you can do that?"
Peter looked up and gave it some thought.
"Yes." he said.
"You're an exian, right? I thought that they didn't have Kings?" Verence asked.
"True. We don't seem to need them." Peter explained.
"So what do you do instead?" Verence asked, intrigued. "I've tried to get Democracy working here, but they don't pay any attention."
"We elect a Prime Minister, we throw him in jail, then we do what we want." Peter explained.
"Why do you throw him in prison straight away?" Verence was intrigued.
"Saves time." Verence laughed.
"Ok, you got the job. You can start tomorrow. Do you have somewhere to stay? If not, see

Millie, and she'll find a room for you."
They shook hands again, and Peter left the room.
Verence shook his head, and went back to the accounts.

Shaun Ogg lent on his spear and looked over the battlements of Lancre Castle. Absolutly nothing. Not since the Vampires had been though had anything happened. Oh there were a few people out working in the fields, but there was no serious threat. And if there was a threat the witches would take care of it. They always did. Nothing that he could deal with. Oh, he'd fought against Elves, he touched his iron armor in memory. He'd led an army against the Elves. Granny had fixed that. And Vampires, or their mercenaries. He smiled at the memory of the gardenrobe exploding. Well, it was one way of getting rid of the it, and Magrat had always hated it, so he hadn't actually got into any trouble over it. But that again, had been the witches. Granny Weatherwax had done some trick on them, and they were gone. But there was nothing that he could say that He Had Done, that He Had Saved the day. He had invented the Lancre Army Knife, which was being sold down on the plains, but that was just inventing. Nothing Military. Nothing he could be proud off. He looked over the battlements again. Granny was approaching the Castle with his Mum. He sighed and dropped the drawbridge, then wandered down to meet them.

"Why didn't you do the Who Goes There!" thing, Our Shawn?" Nanny asked him.
"Cause I can see who it is, and if an Enemy has forced you and Granny to do anything, we're doomed anyway."
He raised the drawbridge and wandered off, without even reaching for the trumpet.
Nanny looked at Granny.
"That was unusual. There is something wrong, but he won't tell his mum."
she said, wandered deeper into the castle looking for Magrat.
"Why would he tell you?" Granny asked.
"Cause I'm his mum, that's why!" Nanny snapped.
Millie Chillum emerged from a door, spotted the witches and gulped.
"Where's Magrat, Millie?" Granny asked.
"M'm, she's in the Nursery, m'm." Millie managed. Granny swept past but Nanny stopped.
"Do you have any idea what's up with Our Shawn, Millie?" she asked.
"No m'm. He's been acting very strange. Quiet. Spends a lot of time up on the battlements m'm."
Nanny nodded, a little mystified, then hurried after Granny. She was waiting around the corner.
Granny smiled.
"I know what's wrong with Shawn!" she said triumphantly
"What? How?" Nanny demanded.
"I just had a look inside his mind. One major thought, was very easy to pick up."
"What is it?" Nanny was hopping from one foot to the other.
"If I tell you, you'll just make his life hell."
"Well, I am his mother. And I will make his life hell unless you tell me."
Granny smiled again.
"He's fallen for Millie." she said simply.
Nanny's mouth fell open.
"Millie?" she asked.
Granny nodded.
"Shawn?"
Granny nodded.
"Oahh!" Nanny grinned. "I'll just give him a few hints!" She went to turn, when Granny's stare froze her.
"What?" she demanded.
"Why do you think he hasn't done anything about it yet? He's scared of what you'll do."
"Me? What would I do?"
Granny looked at the ceiling.
"This coming from the woman who wrote 'Joye of Snacks? He also doesn't think he's good enough."
"Why do you care?" Nanny demanded, as they started walking again.
"I did birth him. You were occupied at the time." Granny said.
"I was there." Nanny protested
"You had just taken a swig of your rubbing scumble. I did all the work."
"Ha!" Granny opened the door to the Nursery.
Magrat was talking to a young man who was sitting on the floor, playing with Esme. Esme turned.
"Granny! Granny!Granny!Granny!Granny!Granny!Granny!!" she shrieked and ran to her. Slamming into her legs she burrowed into the dress. Nanny grinned. Granny scowled. The young man stood up.
"Granny, Nanny, this is Peter. He's going to work for Verence." He bowed deeply. Esme took the chance to leap onto his back.
"Horsie!" she shouted. Peter sighed, as if this wasn't the first time, and started to pace around the room. Magrat giggled at the sight of the tall lanky exian, with a toddler shrieking in his ear.
"We just dropped in to check that everything was ok." Granny scowled at Peter as he paced past. He just shrugged at her
"We was also wondering if you had done that notebook you was working on." Granny continued.
Magrat looked blank, then her eyes lit up.
"Oh, the Witches Desk Herbal Reference?" She took a small book from a drawer and handed it over. Granny flipped through the pages.
"It's strange, Shawn was looking though it earlier. Wouldn't say what he was looking for though" Magrat mentioned in passing. Granny and Nanny looked at each other. Magrat caught the look, and thought deeply.
"Although, it was around the love potions section." She looked up and grinned. "Millie?" she asked.
"Yep." Nanny confirmed. Magrat laughed.
"Explains a lot!" she chuckled. "He hasn't been blowing his own trumpet."
Nanny and Magrat cracked up, Granny looked on disapprovingly. Peter stopped next to her.
"Silly." Esme commented, then leapt towards Granny.
"Want to go for a walk, Esme?" Granny asked her.
"yes! Peter come to!" she chirped, and lent out for him.
Granny stared at him and nodded.
"Do what you want." He nodded, and followed as they left the other two still laughing.