Hunger

Po looked gauntly at the bowl of bean buns before him. Each time the team took another bun out from the bowl, it made his stomach churn but not growl. He had been drinking tons of water before this and ate some of the buns before, but his mind and body were crying for some kind of nutrition. "Po?"

"Huh?"

"Are you okay?" Tigress asked.

"Yeah buddy," Monkey added, "You're staring at the buns pretty hard. You can have some if you want."

"No, no, it's okay. I'm full. Really, I am. I ate some at my dad's place," Po smiled.

And the Furious Five believed it. Po's eyes switched from the buns to his belly. While the exercise and duties had made him much thinner than the average panda, his belly still held a small jiggle with each step he took. The panda sighed and got up. "I'm going to bed."

"Already? But it's not even sunset yet."

"Yeah, I know, I'm just... a little tired from today," Po answered Viper. With that, the panda walked back to his room and sat down on his mat, gazing at his belly. "Ugh, I have to stop tempting myself like this. I'll be fine." Though try as he might, very little in the panda's heart thought he would be.

Meanwhile, Tigress gave a small sigh, loud enough to catch the others' attention. "Oh no, not you too," Mantis complained. "What's the matter?"

"It's Po."

"What about him?"

"Don't you think something is wrong with him? He hasn't eaten with us for a month," Tigress pointed out.

"Well, he said that he usually goes to his father's place," Viper reminded. "Maybe he just gets the food there."

"But why not make the food here?" Tigress asked. The snake couldn't answer. "I believe something is wrong with Po."

"What?"

"I'm going to find that out tomorrow," She declared. And so, the next day, Tigress followed Po from a distance, hiding on top of houses, behind trees, and under bridges. She followed the panda from the shop and back up to the Training Hall, where he fought his very hardest.

But something was wrong.

Tigress could see the panda's gait wobble, and though he tried his best to hide it, the labored strain in his voice was apparent, like a man trying to stay sane by consciously pulling at the muscles he knows convey happiness. The panda's hands constantly rubbed his arms and shoulders, as if he were cold this summer. There were times when he seemed better, like when he ate some beans and soup or a bit of tofu. His mood and attitude perked up, but within a few hours, he'd seem depressed and tired, groaning inwardly for a bed.

As the day wound down, Tigress walked absentmindedly to the Hall of Heroes. "Po," She mumbled to herself. "What is going on?" As her feet passed the stone/jade floor into the Hall of Heroes, she found Shifu and the Furious Five standing inside. Master Shifu had called them for an important meeting, but the tiger noticed that Po wasn't there that night. The lanterns flickered in the tall airy room, and the red panda paced back and forth in front of his students as Tigress stood at attention and fell in line. Her mind still thought about Po until Master Shifu said,

"I called all of you together to address an important issue that Mr. Ping has asked me to speak with you about."

"What's the matter, Master Shifu?" Viper asked.

"It's about Po." Tigress's head snapped up from the glossy floor and looked straight at Shifu.

"What about him?" she asked.

"Mr. Ping has mentioned that Po seems to be very... sickly lately, and he doesn't know why. From all accounts, he seems to be fine, but it doesn't seem like he is his usual self," Shifu stroked his beard, furrowing his eyebrows into the jade floor. "And after what's been happening lately."

"What has been happening?" Tigress asked.

"Po has been... fainting recently for the past month," Shifu revealed. "It doesn't happen often, but it seems to happen in the early mornings rather than the evenings, but I don't understand why."

"Tigress was following him to make sure that he was alright," Viper reminded everyone, "Did you find anything wrong?"

"Nothing significant," Tigress replied. "He's been doing his usual routines normally. But he is... depressed and feeble-looking. I do worry something is wrong with him. Something that he is not telling us."

"As am I," Shifu mumbled.

"Has Mr. Ping told you anything that seems out of the ordinary, Master Shifu?"

Shifu shook his head. "Other than Po has not eaten as much at his shop anymore. But-"

"WHAT?!" The Furious Five exclaimed. Shifu looked at their shocked faces.

"Mr. Ping said that Po does seem eager to eat, but each time he tries to get Po to eat, he says he just ate at the Jade Palace," The red panda said.

"But that's impossible," Crane said. "He told us that... that..." He didn't need to say anymore. It was obvious to everyone what was happening.

"He's not eating," Tigress said aloud.

"But why?" Shifu asked.

That was the question that Tigress would ask Po herself. The next day, Po rounded the kitchen corner and sat down to eat. It was early, much earlier than the others normally woke up. He grabbed a small plate of food: three stir-fried soy cubes, one bean bun, and a glass of milk. The panda sighed sadly and sat down.

"I was curious where my soy cubes were going."

"AHHH!" Po jumped up and saw the striped cat leaning on the doorpost. "Ti-Ti-Ti-Tigress, wha-wh-what are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be training?"

Tigress narrowed her eyes. Had he figured out their schedules to the minute? Is that why he could sneak in these moments of eating? "I was feeling... peckish."

"That's a lie," Po quickly said. "You're never peckish."

"There's a first for everything."

"Tigress, what are you doing here?"

"I live here."

"TIGRESS I-" Po clamped his hand over his mouth with eyes as wide as saucers. Never, ever had he shouted at Tigress like that. The moment only shook the feline for a few moments before she sat down next to him. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to shout. I was just-"

"Why?"

"Huh?"

"Po, sit down." The panda did so. "Why haven't you been eating?"

"Huh? What do you mean? I've been eating. Look, I'm eating right now."

Tigress's stare didn't waver. "Let me ask a different way. Why are you eating less than you usually do?"

"What do you mean? I'm still-"

"Mr. Ping told us you haven't been eating at his shop and I followed you everywhere yesterday, so I know you didn't eat anywhere else. Plus, you never eat this little for breakfast," Tigress quickly listed. "Now, the truth. Why are you eating less than you usually do?"

"I... I... I don't want to talk about it," Po sighed.

"Po, you're depressed, you tired all the time, you've been fainting during training," She stopped to touch his hand. Her eyes shot open. "And you're freezing."

"I'm just... going through changes?"

"Po, stop it. Why are you doing this?" Tigress firmly asked. The panda said nothing. He simply looked down at the table. "Po, we want to help you. Please, I don't want to see you go through this."

"Maybe it's for the best," Po struggled to say, "Didn't you say that the Dragon Warrior could live off of universe juice?"

Tigress glared hard. "Maybe when you're in a tough situation, but not in everyday life. Po, please, if you don't tell us what's happening, you could really hurt yourself."

"I... I'm fine, Tigress. I'm just-"

"Po," Tigress nearly shouted. "Why aren't you eating?"

"Because I'm fat!" Po shot up from his seat. "Okay, I'm fat! And I'm tired of being fat! You know how hard it is to go to the panda village, be the thinnest panda there, and still get made fun of here?! I still get called tubby and fatty! For once, I'd like to look at a mirror and not have these thoughts about why I look bad or stupid or ugly or fat and... and" He crashed back down into his chair. "I just... want to be... like everyone else. I'm the fattest Kung fu fighter there is and-"

"When did this all start?" Tigress interrupted. "You haven't had these thoughts before."

Po was silent for what seemed like ten minutes. His hands were shaking. On closer inspection, Tigress could see his eyes were sunken and bags from sleepless nights started to form.

Po sniffled, "At the Masters' council ceremony, I overheard some masters making some of the jokes you guys made when I was chosen."

Tigress could remember those jokes all too well. She both raged and saddened inside herself. How could masters that Po probably saved a dozen times over find it in their hearts to make those jokes? But then again, how could she, someone who was so caught up in her determination to achieve the Dragon Warrior Title make jokes and berate someone who honestly was thrown into a situation against his will. Those jokes were made in what she thought was a defense of the art of Kung Fu against people who treat it like a joke. But now, having known Po and known the struggles he faced, she realized that those jokes were made in jealousy as well.

"I just thought," Po continued. "That after all this time, the people who were fighters like me would be... you know... understanding. It's just..." Po shut his eyes. The pain was growing too much. "I... I can't change what I am, Tigress. No matter how hard I try I can't change it. I tried with Shifu. I tried before Shifu to be someone that I could like. But it wasn't enough. It's never enough." Tigress tried to say a word of encouragement, but something dripping down Po's face silenced her. "I just... More than anyone, I just want to see my toes! But no matter how hard I try, what I eat, or how hard I train, I'm never enough! It's gotten so bad that I don't... trust myself eating food! What if I gain weight again?! What if I eat so much that I end up starving you guys! And that's happened before!" He buried his head in his hands. "I... I just want to be... myself. Is that not enough?" He cried bitterly.

Tears streamed down his forearms and puddled onto the table. Tigress gently did the only thing she could. She wrapped her arms around his body, hugging him tightly as he wept.

Then she glanced at the door. The Furious Five and Shifu all stood at the entrance. She could only assume that they had listened in on the conversation. Silently, they moved over to Po and hugged him too as he cried.

The next four months were difficult. Mental things always take time. The Furious Five and Shifu worked hard to get Po's normal eating underway. Interestingly enough, Master Bear happened to be in the area and began training with the Dragon Warrior. But his advice was surprising. "You need to eat more."

"Uhhh. I uh," Po stuttered. No one outside of the Furious Five and Shifu knew about his eating problem. "But... won't I get... you know... fat... ter?"

"Not with the amount of work you're doing," Master Bear said, patting his own round yet sturdy belly. "You're constantly building muscle under fur. You need to feed your body in order to build up strength. Someone who works on themselves should never starve themselves."

"But I've seen masters fast and-"

"They do it for spiritual purposes, which is really the only reason you should fast. But you're a Kung Fu warrior AND A growing boy," Master Bear said, heartily slapping Po on the back. "You need to eat. If you work physically, you need to eat physically. If you work mentally, you need to eat mentally. If you work emotionally, you have to eat emotionally. If you work spiritually, you need to eat spiritually."

Though the bear was ignorant of the panda's struggle, it did help Po put things a bit into perspective. He was constantly improving himself and working himself out. Food was fuel, not an aesthetic curse on his body. After the next two months, Po was back to eating his usual food, and he also managed to gain a bit of a sleeker look. One day, he looked in the mirror and couldn't stop smiling. "Po?"

"Oh! Master Shifu."

"What are you doing?"

"I just..." Po smiled, staring at the mirror. "I just... like how I look. How the real me looks."

Shifu's eyes widened, but he smiled grandly, placing a small hand on Po's round slightly jiggly belly. "We like how you look too."

Everything was... okay. The only strange thing was Tigress's behavior. Her vicious takedown of bandits that teased Po about his weight wasn't new. That was normal even before Po's extreme diet. But one day, during another ceremony, a thin gazelle master made a snide comment about Po's weight. "I'm sure that even the Dragon Warrior could look more... presentable to the people he protects."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Po asked, crossing his arms.

"I'm just saying that weight like yours shouldn't be the most... prominent thing on you. Besides, that weight can't be healthy."

"I'm a panda," Po remarked calmly.

"Is that an excuse?"

"No, just reality. No one mistakes you for a coat rack because of your antlers," Po said. He didn't mean it as an insult, anyone could see that, but the small snigger from one of the gazelle's students must have hurt some pride in the gazelle.

"My antlers have a purpose. The only purpose I can see your... girth having is to cause earthquakes."

Crane, Viper, Shifu, Mantis, and Monkey all glared at the gazelle. His poise/students, a small band of snow leopards and rhinos, awkwardly chuckled with their master.

Po rolled his eyes. It didn't bother him as much anymore because he knew what was underneath his own fur.

Suddenly, there was a flash. Before that flash, the gazelle was chuckling haughtily to himself. But afterward, he was screaming at the top of his lungs. Po blinked, "What the-"

"GET HER OFF OF ME!" He managed to voice out enough though two heavy hands were around his neck. Po shook his head awake and finally realized that Tigress had jumped the gazelle and was close to strangling the gazelle out of his life. His students didn't dare help him.

"Say that again," Tigress growled in a hiss. "I dare you to say that again about him!"

"Tigress!" Po and the others immediately pulled her off of the gazelle.

"Tigress, what are you doing?!" Po asked. The tiger shook his hold on her.

"No master," She said loudly enough for anyone to hear, "Should act like bullies or villains by belittling others on what they look like or who they are! Anyone who lives off the ridicule of others shouldn't be called master." She glared at the students, who scattered away, never to train under that gazelle again.

Needless to say, that ceremony was tense until it was done. Afterward, though, Po was sure that Shifu would have a word or two with Tigress but was surprised when the red panda didn't say anything to her.

So, Po decided to talk to Tigress.

"What in China was that?"

Tigress sat in a folded lotus position with her eyes closed. "You'll have to be more specific, Po."

"Why did you nearly kill a Kung Fu master for calling me fat? Or... I think he called me fat. I don't know; he was using a lot of words."

"He... stepped out of line."

"Tigress."

"I don't understand what the problem is," Tigress said, standing up from the ground.

"The problem is that I don't want you to choke someone every time they call me chubby. What if it was a kid that called me fat?"

Tigress turned around and crossed her arms. "Then I get the kid's mother."

"And if they're an orphan."

"Then I AM the kid's mother."

"Tigress."

"I never want to see you in that pain again, Po!" She shouted. Silence fell between them. Po had stepped back, fearing a similar fate of the gazelle. "I... it was hard for me to see you in that kind of pain. All because of what someone else said."

Po sighed, "Look, you're right. I shouldn't have let it get to me the first time, but-"

"That's not the point. No one, regardless of status or experience, should ever be treated the way you were treated. I've... I've been through that pain before, Po. The pain of trying to be perfect. And it never happens," She stared aimlessly at the floor. "And I didn't want to see that pain in you, but I still... placed expectations on you when you first came here. And for that... I'm sorry for what I did when you were chosen as Dragon Warrior." Po remained silent.

But he smiled and wrapped his arms around Tigress in a hug. "I forgave you a long time ago, Tigress. It's okay."

The tiger slowly hugged back. "I don't want you to be in pain like that again, Po. If something is bothering you, please... Please tell me... o-or one of us."

"Of course," Po smiled as he released her. "Thanks, Tigress." The feline smiled back. The panda quietly left the room where he saw Shifu waiting for him in the hall.

"Is everything okay, Dragon Warrior?" He asked with a slight smile on his face.

"Uh... yeah. Hey, Master Shifu? Why didn't you talk to Tigress about what happened earlier?"

Shifu simply lifted the corner of his lips and strolled away, saying, "I... choose my battles, carefully, Po."

"Wait, how does that... ooohhhhh," Po slowly got it and smiled as his master left the hall. "It's really nice to know I got friends who care so much about me." And with that, Po went to sleep, full from the ceremony's dinner.

The End

A/N: Surprisingly, obese individuals, bodybuilders, and models can all suffer the same problem: A destructive hyperfocus on weight, diet, and how their bodies look, which can be rooted in childhood problems, social pressures, or legit health concerns. But sometimes the problem is not majorly the body but the mind. Regardless of how you or anyone looks, healthy simply means "in good health or not diseased," and today there are more physically fit or slender people who are sick in the mind. Please, do not punish your physical self or shun your psychological health. Taking care of yourself means accepting who you are while improving yourself to see what you are capable of. In short, you accept yourself and improve yourself to enjoy yourself and others.