*Welcome back as our heroes reach Kings Cross Station*
Harry: I think someone saw us!
Arthur: Oh, I don't know...those people were shooting at wild ducks...yes...
Nagino: Sh...sh...shooting?
Percy: Ah, you're here. And there's Penelope! Here's your luggage, Harry.
Penelope!
*She walks through the barrier*
Percy: Penelope! Oh, drat! *Runs through the barrier*
Fred: Let's all run through the barrier like wild animals!
Molly: Good idea...oh, what am I saying? We can't we must all go separately!
Fred: I know. We can do...mum, allow me to demonstrate: *Runs at the barrier
screaming* YIEEEEEEEEEE!!!! *Jumps through the barrier!
Ron: That looks fun! *Runs at the barrier* YAAAAAAAAA!!!!
George: Good idea, Bros.! BANZAI!!!!!!!!!
Arthur: Oh, Molly, it does look like fun!
Molly: Yes...and after all, they are going through the barrier separately.
Oh, I'll go, too! *Runs at the barrier* I'M COMING, BOYS! FOLLOW ME GINNY!
ARTHUR! HARRY! BOOYAH!!!!
Arthur: Well, she's gone...NOW WE CAN ALL RUN THROUGH TOGETHER!!! *Eyes
widen, and he throws his head back, and laughs* FOLLOW ME, BOYS!!!
Ginny: What?! I can't believe you did this to me! *Breaks down* I was born a
boy, and you never told me!
Harry: WHAT?!
Arthur: ...and girls!
Ginny: HOW DARE YOU SCARE ME LIKE THAT?! *Runs after him, and pushes him
through the barrier*
*Harry follows*
*Inside, Ginny is still screaming at Arthur and people are starting to stare*
Harry: Shut up, you prat!
Ginny: Not you, too! *Slaps him across the face*
*Meanwhile, Draco sees the fiasco from the other side of the train station*
Draco: Go Weasley!
Ginny: My name is Ginny! *Runs up and slaps him*
Draco: How could you? *Slaps her*
Ginny" How could YOU? *Slaps him*
*Draco and Ginny start slapping each other*
Ron: Come on, Harry. We better...get on the train...
*Harry and Ron board the train with Hermione, and find an empty compartment*
Hermione: I wonder if they're still at it? *Looks out the window, and sees
Ginny and Draco wrestling. Opens the window* GO, DRACO!
*Harry and Ron stare at her*
Hermione: *Pause* I WAS POSSESSED! POSSESSED I TELL YOU!!!
Ron: Okay...Hey, Harry, what did Dudley do last summer?
Harry: Oh, that. *Smiles evilly* Well... *whispers*
Ron: *Spits out his pumpkin juice, and starts howling with laughter*
Hermione: Ron, don't you know that's rude?
Ron: *Realizes something* DON'T YOU KNOW my name? That was her, this is me!
We're different as can be...
Harry: Ron!
Ron: She and I are nothing alike...
Hermione: SHUT UP!!
*Cho walks into the compartment*
Cho: *Looks at the seat next to Harry* Is this seat taken?
Harry: No...
*Ginny comes in*
Ginny: It is, now. See ya, Chow!
Cho: My name is Cho, you cracker!
Ginny: Not again! *Slaps her*
Cho: Hey! *Slaps Ginny*
Harry: Go Cho!
Ginny: How dare you! *Slaps him*
Ron: How many times are we going to go through this?!
*They slowly push Cho and Ginny out the compartment door, and slide it shut*
Nagino: I can still hear them.
Harry: They'll stop sooner or later.
Voice: Whatever...
Ron: Who was that?
Hermione: Sounds like...
All: Peeves!
Peeves: Yep.
Hermione: What are you doing now? Are you going to turn the lights off, or
stop the train?
Peeves: No. I'm just enjoying a nice magarita!
Ron: He's gone wacko! What a nutter!
Peeves: That's me!
All: AAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
Peeves: MUAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!!!!!!!!
*The compartment opens*
Minerva: Peeves! I got a signal from my new high tech radio telling me that
you were here!
Hermione: But we're almost at Hogwarts. Muggle appliances like radios don't
work!
Minerva: I know! It's imaginary! Isn't it great?
Hermione: Um...no...
Minerva: Detention for you, Granger!
Hermione: *Quietly* Yes!
Minerva: I heard that, missy! Detention terminated!
Hermione: Aw man!
Ron: Hermione, is that really you in there?
Hermione: *Grins*
Minerva: Enough! Peeves! I'm taking you up front. Granger, if you show up at
detention, I'll personally see that...that...oh, I don't know. I'll determine
you're punishment if you show to detention.
Hermione: But I want...
Minerva: Enough said, Granger!
*Minerva exits*
Hermione: She always ruins my fun...
Nagino: Ruins?!
Harry: Don't mind her, she's crazy.
*Hermione takes out a tub-o-wear container out*
Ron: What's in there?
Hermione: That surprise stuff from Wayside School. Todd or someone from the
thirtieth story said he got some weird side effects.
Harry: Wait, you know Todd?
Hermione: Oh sure! And Leslie, and Paul, and Benjamin, and Mac, and...
Nagino: Make it shut up!
Hermione: And Mrs. Jewls. and Sammy the dead rat, and Kathy, and Dameon, and
Myran, and...
Ron: Hermione...
Hermione: No, there's no one called Hermione there. I also know Terrance, and
Louis, and Allison, and Rondi, and those...other people...oh, I also know
Mr. Pikel, or something! He's the school guidance counselor, and he gave me a
checkup a few days ago! He made me find a way to stop being such a know it
all!
Harry: Okay, can we stop talking about Wayside?
Hermione: But I didn't eat the surprise dish Ms. Mush gave me when I spent
the day at Wayside. Ms. Zarves said she liked it a lot.
Ron: But there is no Ms. Zarves, and there is no Nineteenth story...
Harry: CAN YOU EAT YOUR FOOD SO YOU CAN BOTH SHUT UP, AND STOP TALKING ABOUT
THAT WAYSIDE SCHOOL?!
Hermione: Oh, all right! *Takes a bite, and looks at Ron. Her eyes glaze
over, and her face turns different colors. She runs up to Ron and gives him a
big smooch, and then returns to normal*
Ron: Hermione! *Wipes his lips with his sleeve* UGH!!!
Hermione: What'd I do? What'd I do?
Nagino: Is she kidding?
Harry: Hermione, you just kissed Ron! You sicko!
Ron: Don't go callin' me a sicko!
Harry: I didn't mean you!
*Ginny runs in*
Ginny: Don't go tricking my brother like that! *Slaps Harry*
*Ginny runs out*
Harry: Why does she keep DOING THAT?
Hermione: She's paranoid.
Harry: Not like Ron.
Ron: I am NOT paranoid! *Pause* Oh my God, Harry, is somebody watching me?
Loudspeaker: Attention all students, we will be arriving in Hogwarts in
twenty minutes. All students that do not have their school robes on yet,
please change now.
Hermione: I have to change.
*Ginny runs in again*
Ginny: Me first! *Slaps Hermione, and runs out*
*The door opens and a new girl comes in. She has long blond hair so light
that it's almost silver down to her waist, and turquois eyes*
Girl: Excuse me but I don't know where the bathroom is. *Points to
Hermione* How about you?
Hermione: Sure, come with me, and I'll take you. Just one thing...don't flush
the toilet! It will take you to the fiery underworld! Bwahahahaha!
Girl: You know, I'm not sure I want to go with you. Maybe I'll go ask someone
else.
Harry and Ron: I'll take you! *Look at each other* No! Me!
*Draco comes in with slap-markes on his face*
Draco: Allow me...
*Pansy comes in*
Pansy: No, Draco! I don't want you with any other girl! I'LL take her!
Draco: *All mushy* All right, Pansy, dearest!
*Pansy takes the girl out*
Ron: Oh my God, Draco, are you okay?
Draco: Well I have to listen to Pansy. After all, she's my girl!
Harry: You are NASTY!
Hermione: Draco and pug-faced Pansy Parkinson!
Draco: Don't call her that! She is not pug-faced! Her face looks like a
Chow-chow!
Harry: Yeah, that's a lot better!
Draco: Isn't it? *Swaggers out*
Ron: At least he's still swaggering like a macho...
Hermione: Yeah, but he's still going cuckoo.
Harry: And you're not?
Nagino: I think they're all going nuts.
Harry: Yes, that's what is seems like.
Ron: Harry, STOP talking to that snake! There are better things to talk to!
Like US!
Hermione: Yeah, Harry! I don't think that I want to be in here with you right
now! I'm going to change. Smell ya later, Potter. *Walks off with rock music
playing in the backround*
*The rock music shakes, and stops*
Harry: *Looks around to see where the noise was coming from* That was...
Ron: Scary...
Loudspeaker: Attention all students, we have now arrived at Hogwarts.
Harry: Hermione is still in the bathroom...
Ron: Should we go get her?
Loudspeaker: Everyone must get off the train now. If not...no one will even
find your shadow...
Harry and Ron: We've got to get her!
*Harry and Ron go to the bathroom, and stand by the door*
Ron: *Quietly* Hermione...Hermione...
Harry: She's never going to hear that! *A little louder* Hermione...
Ron: HERMIONE!!!
*Hermione doesn't come out*
Harry: Go in and get her.
Ron: I'm not going to go into the girls bathroom. YOU'RE going to go into the
girls bathroom.
Harry: No, YOU are!
Ron: YOU ARE!!
Loudspeaker: ATTENTION ALL STUDENTS! IF YOU HAVE NOT GOTTEN OFF THE TRAIN
YET, GET OFF IT, NOW!!!! THAT MEANS YOU MR. POTTER, MR. WEASLEY, MS. GRANGER,
AND MS. DELACOUR! *Pause* ALL RIGHT, MS. CHANG, AND MS. WEASLEY, BREAK IT UP!
Harry: Just go in already!
Ron: Wait, did he say Ms. Delacour? Wasn't that Fleur's last name?
Harry: Hey, it was! Maybe we'll meet her. But hey, why wasn't she sent to
Beauxbatons.
Voice: Well, no accent would make me stand out, and I'd rather not go all the
way to France.
*Harry and Ron turn around, and the girl that they had met earlier is
standing in the doorway*
A/N: Reminder, I am writing this as it comes to my head.
Ron: Oh God, it's you!
Girl: You don't have a problem with me, do you?
Ron: No! O-of course not!
Harry: So, do you have any relatives named Fleur?
Loudspeaker: POTTER, WEASLEY, GRANGER, DELACOUR, OFF! NOW!!!
Hermione: Runs out of the bathroom.
Nagino: Hey, Hermione! Can I come with you!
Harry: *Puts Nagino down* Just meet me in my room, okay?
Nagino: Gotcha. *Slithers away*
Girl: I'll tell you when we get off. I don't want that guy to be any madder
at me.
*So the kids got off the train, and headed for the school building. How is
this girl related to Fleur? Is the part Veela? Find out next time in this
wacked out Harry Potter skit!*
Harry: I think someone saw us!
Arthur: Oh, I don't know...those people were shooting at wild ducks...yes...
Nagino: Sh...sh...shooting?
Percy: Ah, you're here. And there's Penelope! Here's your luggage, Harry.
Penelope!
*She walks through the barrier*
Percy: Penelope! Oh, drat! *Runs through the barrier*
Fred: Let's all run through the barrier like wild animals!
Molly: Good idea...oh, what am I saying? We can't we must all go separately!
Fred: I know. We can do...mum, allow me to demonstrate: *Runs at the barrier
screaming* YIEEEEEEEEEE!!!! *Jumps through the barrier!
Ron: That looks fun! *Runs at the barrier* YAAAAAAAAA!!!!
George: Good idea, Bros.! BANZAI!!!!!!!!!
Arthur: Oh, Molly, it does look like fun!
Molly: Yes...and after all, they are going through the barrier separately.
Oh, I'll go, too! *Runs at the barrier* I'M COMING, BOYS! FOLLOW ME GINNY!
ARTHUR! HARRY! BOOYAH!!!!
Arthur: Well, she's gone...NOW WE CAN ALL RUN THROUGH TOGETHER!!! *Eyes
widen, and he throws his head back, and laughs* FOLLOW ME, BOYS!!!
Ginny: What?! I can't believe you did this to me! *Breaks down* I was born a
boy, and you never told me!
Harry: WHAT?!
Arthur: ...and girls!
Ginny: HOW DARE YOU SCARE ME LIKE THAT?! *Runs after him, and pushes him
through the barrier*
*Harry follows*
*Inside, Ginny is still screaming at Arthur and people are starting to stare*
Harry: Shut up, you prat!
Ginny: Not you, too! *Slaps him across the face*
*Meanwhile, Draco sees the fiasco from the other side of the train station*
Draco: Go Weasley!
Ginny: My name is Ginny! *Runs up and slaps him*
Draco: How could you? *Slaps her*
Ginny" How could YOU? *Slaps him*
*Draco and Ginny start slapping each other*
Ron: Come on, Harry. We better...get on the train...
*Harry and Ron board the train with Hermione, and find an empty compartment*
Hermione: I wonder if they're still at it? *Looks out the window, and sees
Ginny and Draco wrestling. Opens the window* GO, DRACO!
*Harry and Ron stare at her*
Hermione: *Pause* I WAS POSSESSED! POSSESSED I TELL YOU!!!
Ron: Okay...Hey, Harry, what did Dudley do last summer?
Harry: Oh, that. *Smiles evilly* Well... *whispers*
Ron: *Spits out his pumpkin juice, and starts howling with laughter*
Hermione: Ron, don't you know that's rude?
Ron: *Realizes something* DON'T YOU KNOW my name? That was her, this is me!
We're different as can be...
Harry: Ron!
Ron: She and I are nothing alike...
Hermione: SHUT UP!!
*Cho walks into the compartment*
Cho: *Looks at the seat next to Harry* Is this seat taken?
Harry: No...
*Ginny comes in*
Ginny: It is, now. See ya, Chow!
Cho: My name is Cho, you cracker!
Ginny: Not again! *Slaps her*
Cho: Hey! *Slaps Ginny*
Harry: Go Cho!
Ginny: How dare you! *Slaps him*
Ron: How many times are we going to go through this?!
*They slowly push Cho and Ginny out the compartment door, and slide it shut*
Nagino: I can still hear them.
Harry: They'll stop sooner or later.
Voice: Whatever...
Ron: Who was that?
Hermione: Sounds like...
All: Peeves!
Peeves: Yep.
Hermione: What are you doing now? Are you going to turn the lights off, or
stop the train?
Peeves: No. I'm just enjoying a nice magarita!
Ron: He's gone wacko! What a nutter!
Peeves: That's me!
All: AAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
Peeves: MUAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!!!!!!!!
*The compartment opens*
Minerva: Peeves! I got a signal from my new high tech radio telling me that
you were here!
Hermione: But we're almost at Hogwarts. Muggle appliances like radios don't
work!
Minerva: I know! It's imaginary! Isn't it great?
Hermione: Um...no...
Minerva: Detention for you, Granger!
Hermione: *Quietly* Yes!
Minerva: I heard that, missy! Detention terminated!
Hermione: Aw man!
Ron: Hermione, is that really you in there?
Hermione: *Grins*
Minerva: Enough! Peeves! I'm taking you up front. Granger, if you show up at
detention, I'll personally see that...that...oh, I don't know. I'll determine
you're punishment if you show to detention.
Hermione: But I want...
Minerva: Enough said, Granger!
*Minerva exits*
Hermione: She always ruins my fun...
Nagino: Ruins?!
Harry: Don't mind her, she's crazy.
*Hermione takes out a tub-o-wear container out*
Ron: What's in there?
Hermione: That surprise stuff from Wayside School. Todd or someone from the
thirtieth story said he got some weird side effects.
Harry: Wait, you know Todd?
Hermione: Oh sure! And Leslie, and Paul, and Benjamin, and Mac, and...
Nagino: Make it shut up!
Hermione: And Mrs. Jewls. and Sammy the dead rat, and Kathy, and Dameon, and
Myran, and...
Ron: Hermione...
Hermione: No, there's no one called Hermione there. I also know Terrance, and
Louis, and Allison, and Rondi, and those...other people...oh, I also know
Mr. Pikel, or something! He's the school guidance counselor, and he gave me a
checkup a few days ago! He made me find a way to stop being such a know it
all!
Harry: Okay, can we stop talking about Wayside?
Hermione: But I didn't eat the surprise dish Ms. Mush gave me when I spent
the day at Wayside. Ms. Zarves said she liked it a lot.
Ron: But there is no Ms. Zarves, and there is no Nineteenth story...
Harry: CAN YOU EAT YOUR FOOD SO YOU CAN BOTH SHUT UP, AND STOP TALKING ABOUT
THAT WAYSIDE SCHOOL?!
Hermione: Oh, all right! *Takes a bite, and looks at Ron. Her eyes glaze
over, and her face turns different colors. She runs up to Ron and gives him a
big smooch, and then returns to normal*
Ron: Hermione! *Wipes his lips with his sleeve* UGH!!!
Hermione: What'd I do? What'd I do?
Nagino: Is she kidding?
Harry: Hermione, you just kissed Ron! You sicko!
Ron: Don't go callin' me a sicko!
Harry: I didn't mean you!
*Ginny runs in*
Ginny: Don't go tricking my brother like that! *Slaps Harry*
*Ginny runs out*
Harry: Why does she keep DOING THAT?
Hermione: She's paranoid.
Harry: Not like Ron.
Ron: I am NOT paranoid! *Pause* Oh my God, Harry, is somebody watching me?
Loudspeaker: Attention all students, we will be arriving in Hogwarts in
twenty minutes. All students that do not have their school robes on yet,
please change now.
Hermione: I have to change.
*Ginny runs in again*
Ginny: Me first! *Slaps Hermione, and runs out*
*The door opens and a new girl comes in. She has long blond hair so light
that it's almost silver down to her waist, and turquois eyes*
Girl: Excuse me but I don't know where the bathroom is. *Points to
Hermione* How about you?
Hermione: Sure, come with me, and I'll take you. Just one thing...don't flush
the toilet! It will take you to the fiery underworld! Bwahahahaha!
Girl: You know, I'm not sure I want to go with you. Maybe I'll go ask someone
else.
Harry and Ron: I'll take you! *Look at each other* No! Me!
*Draco comes in with slap-markes on his face*
Draco: Allow me...
*Pansy comes in*
Pansy: No, Draco! I don't want you with any other girl! I'LL take her!
Draco: *All mushy* All right, Pansy, dearest!
*Pansy takes the girl out*
Ron: Oh my God, Draco, are you okay?
Draco: Well I have to listen to Pansy. After all, she's my girl!
Harry: You are NASTY!
Hermione: Draco and pug-faced Pansy Parkinson!
Draco: Don't call her that! She is not pug-faced! Her face looks like a
Chow-chow!
Harry: Yeah, that's a lot better!
Draco: Isn't it? *Swaggers out*
Ron: At least he's still swaggering like a macho...
Hermione: Yeah, but he's still going cuckoo.
Harry: And you're not?
Nagino: I think they're all going nuts.
Harry: Yes, that's what is seems like.
Ron: Harry, STOP talking to that snake! There are better things to talk to!
Like US!
Hermione: Yeah, Harry! I don't think that I want to be in here with you right
now! I'm going to change. Smell ya later, Potter. *Walks off with rock music
playing in the backround*
*The rock music shakes, and stops*
Harry: *Looks around to see where the noise was coming from* That was...
Ron: Scary...
Loudspeaker: Attention all students, we have now arrived at Hogwarts.
Harry: Hermione is still in the bathroom...
Ron: Should we go get her?
Loudspeaker: Everyone must get off the train now. If not...no one will even
find your shadow...
Harry and Ron: We've got to get her!
*Harry and Ron go to the bathroom, and stand by the door*
Ron: *Quietly* Hermione...Hermione...
Harry: She's never going to hear that! *A little louder* Hermione...
Ron: HERMIONE!!!
*Hermione doesn't come out*
Harry: Go in and get her.
Ron: I'm not going to go into the girls bathroom. YOU'RE going to go into the
girls bathroom.
Harry: No, YOU are!
Ron: YOU ARE!!
Loudspeaker: ATTENTION ALL STUDENTS! IF YOU HAVE NOT GOTTEN OFF THE TRAIN
YET, GET OFF IT, NOW!!!! THAT MEANS YOU MR. POTTER, MR. WEASLEY, MS. GRANGER,
AND MS. DELACOUR! *Pause* ALL RIGHT, MS. CHANG, AND MS. WEASLEY, BREAK IT UP!
Harry: Just go in already!
Ron: Wait, did he say Ms. Delacour? Wasn't that Fleur's last name?
Harry: Hey, it was! Maybe we'll meet her. But hey, why wasn't she sent to
Beauxbatons.
Voice: Well, no accent would make me stand out, and I'd rather not go all the
way to France.
*Harry and Ron turn around, and the girl that they had met earlier is
standing in the doorway*
A/N: Reminder, I am writing this as it comes to my head.
Ron: Oh God, it's you!
Girl: You don't have a problem with me, do you?
Ron: No! O-of course not!
Harry: So, do you have any relatives named Fleur?
Loudspeaker: POTTER, WEASLEY, GRANGER, DELACOUR, OFF! NOW!!!
Hermione: Runs out of the bathroom.
Nagino: Hey, Hermione! Can I come with you!
Harry: *Puts Nagino down* Just meet me in my room, okay?
Nagino: Gotcha. *Slithers away*
Girl: I'll tell you when we get off. I don't want that guy to be any madder
at me.
*So the kids got off the train, and headed for the school building. How is
this girl related to Fleur? Is the part Veela? Find out next time in this
wacked out Harry Potter skit!*