The Price of Honor
written by aeyta
synopsis: Honor has a very high price, how far will Elena go to retrieve her long lost honor? Includes the Turks (grins), Avalanche (somewhat), Elena/Reno! bwa ha hahaha... Some Cloud/Tifa and remembrances of Elena on Tseng, and other people. Yeah.... Mostly focused on Elena though. :)
note: okay. prologue is short and gross. oh well. im going for the goal of 5 kb. _ my chapters are always short and im trying to make them longer. (from a dream, p:4kb,1:9kb,2:7kb,3:8kb,4:18kb) and im rewriting one shots to make them longer as well as writing new oneshots longer than usual. ^_^ anyway, hope you enjoy.
also, sometimes i have a habit of making the prologue in a pov and the rest omniscient. ill probably do that in this fic. i might make it all one pov but im not sure yet.
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-- Prologue --
It was dark. I hate the dark. I remember when I was young, my father chased me around with a knife from the kitchen because I defended Mama when he was yelling at her. He would yell at her a lot, he chased me into a closet and I locked it from the inside. It was a small closet with a light but the light switch was from the outside. I can still remember him yelling, "Fuck you, if you don't open the door, don't ever fucking come out."
I had to come out sooner or later but I stayed there until the hunger that was eating at my stomach had started gnawing me so bad, I had to go out to eat. And I did, only to find with relief that the man I called "Father" was drunk again and sleeping. My Mama was there at the table, sobbing like she always did.
I used to think that she was the only person I could love, the only person I could depend on, the only person who loved me. I hated the man I called "Father." One day, my father didn't come back home. Not that I cared, but Mama did love him. I don't know why but she did love him, somehow. I was only five years then, what the fuck did I know. I just knew when I should get away from my father and I knew when to hide. I knew I didn't love my father even though I should've.
It may sound strange but my Mama was a teacher, she loved to teach children and she loved children. Correction, she used to. My father had broken her, she was no longer in love with her work, but found it a sanctuary instead. Mama taught me many things so I was really smart, I knew many things bookwise as well as streetwise.
I thought Mama loved me but she didn't, now that I think of it. After father had left and Mama was alone, one day she never came back from work. I was only five years old and eventually ran away from home, only to get stuck in one of those child orphanages.
A lady came there one day, she was dressed in many furs and was very beautiful, she had golden hair and blue jewels for eyes. She looked at me and smiled, she smiled kindly yet strictly, she took me home. I found out years later that she couldn't have children and wanted a girl.
The next couple of years was somewhat heaven and somewhat torture. I was expected to be the best of the best, I always took baths everyday and was never clean enough. My new mother would brush my hair everyday and made sure that it was nice and long. She made sure I had a nice body as I grew up, she made me learn how to play many instruments. I can play a violen, a piano, a harp, and a cello. She made me practice every day for an hour and I had private tutors, the best of the best.
I learned how to sing and I learned how to paint, I learned everything about history, about computers as well, I learned as much as I could yet my mother always pushed me more and more. I had no friends, I never had any fun, only work. My mom was crazy, she even signed me up for martial arts as well as gun shooting. She wanted me to be able to do anything and everything. When I grew older, I realized that she was trying to make me someone she didn't turn out to be.
I went to a good college when I was only fourteen and graduated four years later. My mother was still not proud of me. I ran away from home and joined Shinra. I also cut my hair, I think it was some sort of sign for me. I don't know now, I just know that when I cut it I was fucking happy. I got up ranks quickly, my graduation from a top college let me rise to top quite easily. And I was a secretary for a very long time. Later, I learned that the computer skills I learned had turned into hacking skills and I was quickly breaking into Shinra files.
I was arrested and brought in front of Heidegger, who said I was Turk material. I didn't know what a Turk was then.
So here I am now. I still hate the dark. It reminds me of my father.
I looked around the broken city ruins, why had I come here again...? Oh yeah, I'm supposed to help them. I wanted to, I wanted to help them in hopes of recovering the guilt I have for helping with the ruin of this place. I'm a coward, I wanted to relieve the guilt feelings I've been getting. I told Reno and Rude that I'd be gone for a few days and they said nothing much, I don't think they'd understand.
I get headaches all the time and I get reminded every hour and every minute, every second of the day who I am no matter how hard I try to forget.
This whole place is a mess, the buildings are hardly building and people lay on the street, the dead have no honor, they lay in piles without a proper burial. Everybody is just there, scattered.
I saw a girl, she had blonde hair and light green eyes. I walked to her, she reminded myself of me when I was young, "Are you lost?" I asked. I wanted to help her, the urge to help her had turned enormous whenever I saw her blink her large eyes.
"Grandma," the girl sobbed out. She had tears running down her eyes as she thought of it and I carried her, suddenly the girl jumped out of my arms and ran to an old woman. "GRANDMA!" she cried out.
"Oh, my child. There you are," the grandmother looked so relieved, it made me feel better. I almost forgot who I was. Almost. The grandmother looked at me gratefully, "What is your name, thank you very much."
"I am Elena," I whisper out, remembering who I am. The grandmother looked at me, her kind look had turned into an ice cold look full of hatred.
"This is your fault," she said in a dangerous voice. "Forgive me, but I do not believe I need your help. You, lady, have no honor," she spat out before holding the little girl's hand and walking away. The girl turned her head to look at me curiously but the grandmother said something to her. The girl looked back at me, she was full of fear.
As I walked through the fallen city, people looked at me strangely and a few ran away. I was hurt, I wanted to pretend it wasn't my fault. I hated this. I hated who I had become.
One man walked up to me, he was much older than me, "Are you Elena?" he asked calmly. I nodded my head. He looked at me, "I suggest you get out, and don't ever come back. We do not need your help for whatever reason it is, we do not want to ever see your face." I merely nodded and walked away towards the exit.
I could feel tears rolling down my burning cheeks. I was full of shame, overwhelmed with shock, and dishonored. It hit me, I had lost all of my honor and there was no way of recovering it.
Or was there?
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author's note: shuddap. it sucks, leave me alone. reviews are heavily appreciated *winks* dont worry, more stuff comin up. (i know its short, ill try to make chapter one longer.)
written by aeyta
synopsis: Honor has a very high price, how far will Elena go to retrieve her long lost honor? Includes the Turks (grins), Avalanche (somewhat), Elena/Reno! bwa ha hahaha... Some Cloud/Tifa and remembrances of Elena on Tseng, and other people. Yeah.... Mostly focused on Elena though. :)
note: okay. prologue is short and gross. oh well. im going for the goal of 5 kb. _ my chapters are always short and im trying to make them longer. (from a dream, p:4kb,1:9kb,2:7kb,3:8kb,4:18kb) and im rewriting one shots to make them longer as well as writing new oneshots longer than usual. ^_^ anyway, hope you enjoy.
also, sometimes i have a habit of making the prologue in a pov and the rest omniscient. ill probably do that in this fic. i might make it all one pov but im not sure yet.
+++
-- Prologue --
It was dark. I hate the dark. I remember when I was young, my father chased me around with a knife from the kitchen because I defended Mama when he was yelling at her. He would yell at her a lot, he chased me into a closet and I locked it from the inside. It was a small closet with a light but the light switch was from the outside. I can still remember him yelling, "Fuck you, if you don't open the door, don't ever fucking come out."
I had to come out sooner or later but I stayed there until the hunger that was eating at my stomach had started gnawing me so bad, I had to go out to eat. And I did, only to find with relief that the man I called "Father" was drunk again and sleeping. My Mama was there at the table, sobbing like she always did.
I used to think that she was the only person I could love, the only person I could depend on, the only person who loved me. I hated the man I called "Father." One day, my father didn't come back home. Not that I cared, but Mama did love him. I don't know why but she did love him, somehow. I was only five years then, what the fuck did I know. I just knew when I should get away from my father and I knew when to hide. I knew I didn't love my father even though I should've.
It may sound strange but my Mama was a teacher, she loved to teach children and she loved children. Correction, she used to. My father had broken her, she was no longer in love with her work, but found it a sanctuary instead. Mama taught me many things so I was really smart, I knew many things bookwise as well as streetwise.
I thought Mama loved me but she didn't, now that I think of it. After father had left and Mama was alone, one day she never came back from work. I was only five years old and eventually ran away from home, only to get stuck in one of those child orphanages.
A lady came there one day, she was dressed in many furs and was very beautiful, she had golden hair and blue jewels for eyes. She looked at me and smiled, she smiled kindly yet strictly, she took me home. I found out years later that she couldn't have children and wanted a girl.
The next couple of years was somewhat heaven and somewhat torture. I was expected to be the best of the best, I always took baths everyday and was never clean enough. My new mother would brush my hair everyday and made sure that it was nice and long. She made sure I had a nice body as I grew up, she made me learn how to play many instruments. I can play a violen, a piano, a harp, and a cello. She made me practice every day for an hour and I had private tutors, the best of the best.
I learned how to sing and I learned how to paint, I learned everything about history, about computers as well, I learned as much as I could yet my mother always pushed me more and more. I had no friends, I never had any fun, only work. My mom was crazy, she even signed me up for martial arts as well as gun shooting. She wanted me to be able to do anything and everything. When I grew older, I realized that she was trying to make me someone she didn't turn out to be.
I went to a good college when I was only fourteen and graduated four years later. My mother was still not proud of me. I ran away from home and joined Shinra. I also cut my hair, I think it was some sort of sign for me. I don't know now, I just know that when I cut it I was fucking happy. I got up ranks quickly, my graduation from a top college let me rise to top quite easily. And I was a secretary for a very long time. Later, I learned that the computer skills I learned had turned into hacking skills and I was quickly breaking into Shinra files.
I was arrested and brought in front of Heidegger, who said I was Turk material. I didn't know what a Turk was then.
So here I am now. I still hate the dark. It reminds me of my father.
I looked around the broken city ruins, why had I come here again...? Oh yeah, I'm supposed to help them. I wanted to, I wanted to help them in hopes of recovering the guilt I have for helping with the ruin of this place. I'm a coward, I wanted to relieve the guilt feelings I've been getting. I told Reno and Rude that I'd be gone for a few days and they said nothing much, I don't think they'd understand.
I get headaches all the time and I get reminded every hour and every minute, every second of the day who I am no matter how hard I try to forget.
This whole place is a mess, the buildings are hardly building and people lay on the street, the dead have no honor, they lay in piles without a proper burial. Everybody is just there, scattered.
I saw a girl, she had blonde hair and light green eyes. I walked to her, she reminded myself of me when I was young, "Are you lost?" I asked. I wanted to help her, the urge to help her had turned enormous whenever I saw her blink her large eyes.
"Grandma," the girl sobbed out. She had tears running down her eyes as she thought of it and I carried her, suddenly the girl jumped out of my arms and ran to an old woman. "GRANDMA!" she cried out.
"Oh, my child. There you are," the grandmother looked so relieved, it made me feel better. I almost forgot who I was. Almost. The grandmother looked at me gratefully, "What is your name, thank you very much."
"I am Elena," I whisper out, remembering who I am. The grandmother looked at me, her kind look had turned into an ice cold look full of hatred.
"This is your fault," she said in a dangerous voice. "Forgive me, but I do not believe I need your help. You, lady, have no honor," she spat out before holding the little girl's hand and walking away. The girl turned her head to look at me curiously but the grandmother said something to her. The girl looked back at me, she was full of fear.
As I walked through the fallen city, people looked at me strangely and a few ran away. I was hurt, I wanted to pretend it wasn't my fault. I hated this. I hated who I had become.
One man walked up to me, he was much older than me, "Are you Elena?" he asked calmly. I nodded my head. He looked at me, "I suggest you get out, and don't ever come back. We do not need your help for whatever reason it is, we do not want to ever see your face." I merely nodded and walked away towards the exit.
I could feel tears rolling down my burning cheeks. I was full of shame, overwhelmed with shock, and dishonored. It hit me, I had lost all of my honor and there was no way of recovering it.
Or was there?
+++
author's note: shuddap. it sucks, leave me alone. reviews are heavily appreciated *winks* dont worry, more stuff comin up. (i know its short, ill try to make chapter one longer.)