TITLE:
THE BODYGUARD 9 AUTHOR: STEPHEN HOWE
E-MAIL:
sh01@bigpond.com.au
FEEDBACK:
Feed me Seymore!
DISTRIBUTION:
Ask and ye shall receive!
DISCLAIMER:
All characters belong to Joss! He created everything! Set in season 5.B/X eventually (Is there any other?) Giles is
Buffy's watcher. Starts off with the
big battle with Glory then jumps two years into the future. My take on what
happens in the season final is just wishful thinking. PG-15 for adult themes.
LOVER
COMES BACK. Buffy and the others backed into the
house." I can't fight him!" Buffy cried out." I prayed for his
return and I'm not going to be the one to kill him!" Dawn cries out to
them." If he's evil why is he killing demons?" Willow joins her at
the window and they watch Xander take the remaining demon killers apart. All except
the cameraman. Xander frames his hands around his face, calling for a close up
shot. " I don't know who you are but if you
want to see this then you really need to get down here fast!" He starts to
walk away then clicks his fingers." Damn I almost forgot." He walks
up to the camera." And tell the Order to stay clear of my kill! Consider
what I'm going to do to these mortals payment enough." He sighs and grins
at the camera." I haven't had 'any' for some time now! " He pulls the
duster around him." Giles and the fangless wonder I'll kill straight away
but the females." He looks at the house and then cocks an eyebrow as he
looks back at the camera." Lets just say they'll die making me very
happy!" Xander runs a hand
through his hair and proceeds to walk up the driveway, stopping only to rip a
paling from the picket fence. He walks up to the front door and hits it with
the palm of his hand sending the door flying inside the house." Heeeeeerz
Xander!" He turns to the camera and smiles." That's all folks!"
He then throws the paling at the demon holding the camera and it hits him then
the force throws him backwards until it impales him against a tree. The gang is gathered in the lounge preparing to battle with him.
Dawn is in the rear holding an axe while Spike stands in front of her wielding
a sword. Willow and Tara have joined hands, chanting a spell to aid the
fighters, while Giles stands in front of Buffy." If there's a shred of the
boy left inside of you leave this house and it's people in peace!" Xander brushes him aside as if he were a
stray feather. He stands in front of Buffy and grins." So B, how d'ya like
the new me?" He holds up his arms and spins around." I'm not the
hopeless nothing you thought I was any more." His face turns angry and he
fails to see the tears begin to stream down her face." Now I decide what I
do and anyone that stands in my way is dust on my boots!" He looks at his
bare feet." When I get some." He looks up at the others and sees
Spike grip his sword a little harder." Spike me old china how's it
hangin'? You know I can get rid of that pesky chip for you, just think of the
horror we could instil in these weak fools!" Spike gulps." You know for the past three years I couldn't
dream of anything else." His face sets hard." But now... If you take
one step towards them I'll knock that smug head clean off your body!" Xander grins and jumps to his feet then
claps." That's my boy Spiky! If you had a said anything else I would have
dusted your ass here and now!" He rubs his hands together." Rightie o
then next step is for me to get some threads." He looks at Giles and he
jumps in his skin." G-man I don't suppose there's any clothes I could wear
around this place, given the sex of the people living here, and seeing as I
can't greet our guest naked could I impose on you to go home and grab me
some?" He looks at Giles as he stands frozen in place." Yeah you're
probably right tweed wouldn't suit me." Spike, hesitantly, holds his hand up."
I.. Ahh have some leather pants and things you could borrow." Xander
turns to the girls." What d'ya think girls, leather not too over done
yet?" Willow nods as Tara tells him." Leather
looks good." They all turn to Dawn as she says." I don't know about
the others but what you're wearing now is just fine by me." Spike smiles
then runs out of the house after seeing the look on the Slayers face. Buffy snaps out of her shock." Okay
hormone girl upstairs now!" She turns to Xander." And you! Just what
the hell's going on? First you vanish and we think you're dead and now you're
this...THIS!" She waves her hands at him before she starts to sob again. Xander looks at the clock on the wall then
slumps back in his chair." I have 8 more hours." Buffy looks at him." 8 more hours till what? You turn into a
pumpkin?" Xander looks over to Giles and he walks
over to Buffy." I think perhaps it's better if we listen." " When
I killed Ben and we were, well vaporised I suppose, the three of us kicked
around a place you could call limbo. And believe me when I say it's not all
that it's cracked up to be." He steepled his fingers as he
continued." Imagine a white space that no matter how far you went it never
ended. Trapped there with a guy you just killed and a ditzy woman that followed
you around cursing your name and promising you ten kinds of hell well we got out." Buffy crossed her arms and glared art
him." I suppose she was dressed like you are?" Xander nods."
Great! And I suppose you expect us to believe you did nothing!" Xander sees the look on her face and his
heart misses a beat*Nah! She can't love me...Can she? * He grins." Not
that it matters to you but. Yeah we did the bump'n'grind. Several times, in
fact there was this one time..." Buffy yells at him." We don't want to
know about your sordid little affair donkey dick! It didn't pass through that
airhead of yours that she was the one trying to suck the world into hell? Or
that she tried to drain my sister or kill everyone in this room..." Xander stands up." Hey! She was a hot
looking chick and I thought we were trapped there for eternity. Besides if the
rolls were reversed it would have taken you less than a heartbeat instead of
almost 2 years before you jumped Ben's bones!" Buffy went red with
rage." You infuriating son of a bitch! Why I would no more do it with Ben
than I would with...." Xander went toe to toe with her." Me?" He
saw her blush deepen only this time it wasn't rage. " Why you...You... Ooh!" She
fought for the words then grabbed his face and kissed him with all she had.
Xander soon responded and their souls, as well as their bodies, joined. Xander
finally broke the kiss and Buffy frowned as he stepped back from her."
Sorry I couldn't help myself." He backed off and went into the kitchen
leaving a dumbfounded slayer in his wake. He kicked the stove then looked up at the
clock and kicked it again." Seven hours and fifty five minutes." "
Nice way to change the subject Xand!" Xander span on his heels and saw
Willow closing the door behind her." What are you talking about
Wills?" " I've known you for too long Xander... Spill 8 hours till
what?" She had her resolved face on and try as he might he couldn't lie to
her." I cut a deal with... Lets just say flames don't bother this guy and
leave it at that. I was shown what was happening down here and was told I could
be reunited with my other half for 9 hours to deal with it." He smiled at
her." So here I am dealing with it. As soon as the person that placed the
contract on you guys gets here I'll pop 'em then scoot off back to never never
land." Willow folded her arms and gave him her
death glare." You're lying again!" He holds up his hands." Okay, okay so I get to sub let a
room from him. I hear it's a dry heat so I should be fine." Willow goes pale as she works out what he's
done." Are you crazy? You sold your soul to be here for 9 hours are you
insane?" Then she looks to the sound of Buffy's voice." You knew we
were in trouble and you did it to save us.. Again! You conceited bastard! What?
You didn't think we could do with out the help of the great Alexander
Harris?" Xander shrugs." I can promise, without
fear of contradiction, it will be the last time Wills." She
hugs him and they feel safe for the first time in a long while. Spike is at the
back door with the clothes and smirks as he opens the door." I always knew
you weren't that gay, Red. So when do you tell Tara and the Slayer? Or is going
to be a foursome kinda thing? If it is can I watch?" Xander laughs,
madly, and tells Spike." Spike it must be wonderful to have a sense of
humour! " He stops laughing and glares at him." When you get one will
you let us know?" Spike places a
hand over his unbeating heart." Oh you hurt me so! Here are your
threads." He lights up a cigarette and flicks ash at Willow." So when
are you going to tell the Slayer about you an' Red playing hide the Salami? Or
if you like I could tell her for you?" Willow glared at him." Nothing happened
Spike! We were just comforting each other. I was so glad he was back." Spike nodded." I believe you Red! But
that doesn't explain why the circus came to town in Xander's duster?" Willow
looked over at Xander as he tried to cover himself." HEY! I haven't been
close to a girl in over two years and when she began hugging me after the kiss
Buffy and I had well..." " Wait
a minute didn't you say you bonked Glory?" Spike looks at Xander." Go X-man!
You snagged the Bitch Queen?" Xander sighs." Of course I didn't you
moron! She's like a whiney killing machine..' Where's my red dress? Get me
something to wear!' We were in limbo for god's sake. Neiman Marcus doesn't have
an outlet there!" Xander picks up the leather pants and shirt." What no
underwear?" He looks at Willow till she sighs and faces the other way then
slips the pants on and tucks the shirt in. He tries to pull the pants away from
his inner thighs and glares at Spike." These are going to chafe like
hell!" Dawn walks in." There's a limo just
pulled up outside." She sees Xander fully clothed." Hey! You got
dressed!" She turned to Willow." God! Don't you know how to share?
Why didn't you call me?" Xander passes by her and whispers to
her." If you don't knock it off young lady I'm going to make sure everyone
at you school thinks you're like willow and Tara and I don't mean you're a
witch." She
frowns." Well he's no fun!" Xander turns off the lights and tells Willow
to scream and rip the dishcloth." But wont that attract the police?"
"
Unless Sunnydale has changed dramatically since I was last here it should keep
them away till daylight." In
the Limo the occupants hear a woman's scream of desperation and then the sound
of a slap and clothes being ripped. One of them smiles." YES! I only wish
I could capture the moment for future viewing!" END OF 9