A/N: Hello, I come with an update that had to be cut into two pieces, otherwise it'd be almost a 9k chapter...
tumblr, ao3: thcorvi
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Chapter III | The Chewmonkey and the Rubber Headshot PT. I
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June
The battle cries and spells that went on below didn't seem to reach her ears. Not knowing if the deafening silence of the corridor she was in was real, she found herself wishing she could hear something, anything—even a cry, an agony howl seemed better. Anything but the sound of her heart pounding ballistic inside her chest, like her own personal crushing warning alarm.
Beware, silence doesn't last forever, it seemed to accompany every thud.
Maia tried to bend deeper into the dirty alcove, wiping the sweat from her forehead with her trembling fingers. Nothing good ever happened when he got out of your sight, she knew; she'd duelled him before—if you can call it a duel, when a person specifically targets you manically the entire time. He wasn't the type to disappear in the middle of a fight usually, or to use sneaky duelling "techniques", even though at first that's what you'd probably think. No, he was the type to come with might. Death Eater or not, the motherfucker was a great duellist; and he had a sadistic passion to overwhelm his "opponent" with his excessively aggressive pose.
Well, at least with the others at first… With her, he'd discovered a different passion for "overwhelming" her.
Clomp… clomp... clomp..
As if a invisible thread had pulled her straight, she was left frozen in place. The heavy sounds of his Dragon-hide boot echoed through the empty hallways, in a disorganized rhythm that in another situation would've made her drummer's insides irritated, if she didn't have a passionate hatred for that damn sound.
Clomp... clomp.. clomp...
No… The thumps that before seemed to come from her right side, now came from the turn of the stairs to the left. Shit, shit, shit. Her fingers whitened from the strength in which she held her wand.
Clomp(clomp).. clomp(clomp)... clomp(clomp)...
The boots sounds began to increase all at once, a disconcerting melody that felt like it came from every corner of the floor. The walls echoing the sound back to her eardrums, in that same orchestral percussion from hell that seemed to be made just for her.
Maia had two options, or she stayed put and waited for him to get tired and come for her; or she would run and enter the minefield, where he was probably waiting to start attacking.
Clomp(clomp)clomp.. clomp(clomp)clomp... clomp(clomp)clomp...
Like in a good game of predator and his prey, he was the type who liked to have fun with his food before catching it.
And like last time, Maia went out to play; by the time she took the first step out of the alcove, she had already shouted a protection charm; feeling it bounce off the red flames coming from somewhere closer to the stairs ahead.
The girl started to run backwards, the sound of his boots still reverberating from every little crack of the entire floor—even though she knew that the wizard who commanded the percussion was in a fixed spot. Managing to gain a small advance, when she managed to create another shield and throw three different hexes towards him, Maia turned and ran down the corridor; dodging the pyrotechnics of colours that were advancing towards her.
With luck setting her aside for a moment as she rounded a hallway; one of his hexes caught her shoulder at the last second. Maia had no choice but to lean against the wall, holding back a cry of pain. Son of a pompous bitch. Well, at least he hadn't struck her right shoulder, then she'd be royally fucked.
Drawing in a deep breath, she spun in place, prepping herself to sprint back towards the first floor, where she could probably get more leisure. It was then that she heard it, in that torn, gravel voice.
"Aw, does it sting, sweetheart? Here, here, I'll make it better... CRUC-"
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Maia jumped awake, her head hitting the wooden ceiling above with a thud.
With one hand gripping the loose bedsheets, and the other her wand, she looked from side to side, searching for the owner of the voice that had caused her so much pain. Pain that she could still feel pulsing from the tips of her toes to right behind the sockets of her eyes; bringing even that metallic taste inside her mouth.
Blue... everything around her was surrounded in a blue hue… some cardboard boxes… more cardboard boxes… a blue armchair… a blue drum kit… blue fairy lights twinkling…
Wait, what?… Drums, fairy lights?… There aren't even outlets in the Room of the Requirements for her to plug something like that—
"Fuckin' hell."
Throwing herself hard back onto the mattress, she pulled away her sweaty strands of hair back; feeling her entire face wet with tears, ones she hadn't even noticed were still falling from her eyes, silently.
It was just a nightmare, only a nightmare.
Repeating that little mantra inside her head, Maia pulled the white curtains aside, seeing the still dark sky observing her back. It was too early for any of this shit—or too late… But knowing she wouldn't be able to fall asleep again, Maia took a deep breath and tried to prep herself mentally to try to get out of the bed; her legs feeling like they were being stabbed from the inside out with even the slightest little movement.
Just a nightmare, obviously. Ha. What kind of nightmares were these that she'd continuously woken up to being physically hurt?
Maia felt an overwhelming urge to start laughing.
God, she was loosing her marbles for good, she thought, as she leaned over the washbasin to spit out the disgusting seep of blood that had pooled inside her mouth. Would this shit ever get better? Maia couldn't understand how they'd managed to move on if scenes like these were a daily thing of occurrences. Who knows, maybe they were just stronger than her… Wasn't it all that they used to say? Something about the Gryffindor bravery and whatever?
Not even with enough strength to change from her sweaty clothes, Maia headed down towards the kitchens. She should start bringing over some juice boxes before calling it a night, just so she didn't have to go downstairs to grab some later. Maybe if she was lucky, Sirius wouldn't have had eaten the leftover's pizza they had that night before as midnight munchies.
A few noises coming from inside the kitchen slowed down her steps.
Either it wasn't as late as she thought it was, or Sirius really needed to fix his sleep routine. No grandpa his age should spend the entire nighttime brewing potions for a pranking store, that was textbook labour exploitation. Maia couldn't help but chuckle mentally, 'grandpa his age'. She could see Snuffles offended expression mocking her in her head, as if he had heard her calling him that in a spurt of Occlumency.
"—sure?"
That voice made her stop for good.
Maia wasn't ready to deal with that right now. Especially after the night she's... still having.
"I think it'll be good for her… Getting out of the country, seeing her siblings… Her sister is coming to get her next week… At least then I can tidy her room up—no more living surrounded by card boxes."
"Godric knows it was good for us… Wait, you didn't even move your shit out? Merlin, Snuffles—How d'you even fit her things inside that place? Unless, you didn't… Does she even have a bedstead, Pads?"
The corners of Maia's mouth turned upwards, regardless of how weird it still was to hear her friend's voice so… mature. Low. Don't get her wrong, it still was completely Harry. Only a more adult-y version…
Which was what he was, so she should stop trying to think otherwise.
But since they were hidden behind the door, Maia could close her eyes and picture that this was just another summer holiday. They were in the Burrow now, she had gone to the loo, while her friends were breaking into the kitchen to see if they could find any leftover desert. They were whispering to each other, and she found it unfamiliar, because their voices had dropped some time before, and she hadn't seen them properly this year. In a few moments, Molly would storm downstairs in a fit, ordering them to stop making such noise at a time like that.
They would apologize right way, chastened, but as soon she left the kitchen, they would burst out giggling like little first-years.
"Of course she has a bedstead!" Sirius replied, offended. "And it's only some boxes… Fleur said something about the importance of making her feel like she belongs here — but to also not push her too much."
That single sentence had vanished the small disillusionment she had momentarily created. The smile falling along with the comforting sensation the false memory had brought her for a few seconds.
Maia let out a dry laugh, feeling a new urge to cry.
Jesus, how stupid could she be?
There were no more summer holidays at the Burrow, no more fits of giggles with her friends in the middle of the night. No more growing up together… That was all in the past, past… A past more far away than she could ever begin to comprehend.
Nowadays… Nowadays, she had meetings at the Department of Mysteries; had her messing up the peaceful life everyone had created for themselves—Sirius specially; had her heading down to the kitchen at the dead of the night to get juice, and some food to try to wash away the taste of blood out of her mouth; muscles still trembling, barely able to hold themselves upright, from the side effects of a sleeping bloody Cruciatus.
"— I-I, look. It's hard, OK? It's different from those years."
"How?"
"You know how… You two—before, I mean, were barely under my care. Moony and Molly sure did most of it… And even if I felt responsible for you lot, it felt like you took more care of me than the other way around… "
"That's not true," Harry replied instantly. "You know that's not true. You always looked out for us… Besides, we always took care of each other, right? And even after the war… You know, you've always been the closest thing I've had to a father, Snuffles."
"Merlin… I fucking love you, kid."
Maia smiled at the shuffling noise, in what she understood came to stop into a tight hug. The little sniffing sounds Sirius made still caused her heart to sink to her stomach, but at least Harry was there to shun those words down and false ideas he had. Whoever have said Sirius Black was cocksure to the point of blind arrogance, didn't understand that man was made of beds of insecurities on top of more beds of insecurities.
"And for Badger… you two have always clicked. She still looks at you like that little kid who knows you'd steal a cookie from another kid to give it to her, if she wanted one—What did you use to say? Right, that she was like a little sister you wished you had to pester when you were younger."
"Fuck, I still see so much of Reg in her…" Sirius sniffed again. "It's just that… Sometimes I catch myself looking at her and thinking I'm the one who travelled back in time… You know?"
A silence ensued, before Harry sighed, "… Not really. The last time I attempted to see her… I think she even cast a muffling spell, so she wouldn't hear me…"
Her bloodshot eyes began to fill with tears again. This really wasn't a good time for her to be standing behind doors listening to conversations that weren't meant for her ears. Forcing her feet to move away, Maia tried to climb the staircases as quickly and silently as she could; thick drops of tears already blurring her path vision.
The rest of the morning, she spent mourning.
Crying over the throbbing pain that wouldn't go away, crying over her future-present-past, over the shithole that was forced upon them by Voldemort; crying over her siblings away, crying over her British family and the life that they've had endured; for Harry, Sirius, Moony, the Weasleys, her friends, the Order… The loved ones that they've had lost…
She shed tears of happiness for the life they all managed to create for themselves, she knew it must've been hard to allow themselves to be happy and to move on; but no one deserved more good in the world than them.
She wept, too, from the shame and the helplessness she felt for avoiding them—even though she wanted it so badly, desperately, at every second.
But more, she cried for having once belonged somewhere; cried for the life that one day she could have lived, but would never get to know.
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July
Maia was sitting in the living room of her older sister's cottage, knees reddened from kneeling on the rug, while her head was being engulfed by the green flames that sprouted out of the fireplace. Since her and her family went out together to buy some new supplies for her nephew's new school term, Maia had decided to use the alone time to make a Floor call to Sirius.
"Morning, Peanut," he said, a smile spreading across his face, "What are you up to?"
"Mornin'," she replied, looking at the mess of papers around her. "I'm making… contact."
Sirius hummed, "OK… Someone from this planet?"
"Ha ha. Five points from lack of originality."
The older man tried to hide the wide smile that spread across his face.
"Hey! You know what they say: It's all about the quality, not the… originality!"
"Who said that?... God, you truly are getting older, and older, within each passing day."
"Firstly, I'm not old! And secondly, God, you truly are getting brattier and brattier, within each passing day," he retorted, in a high-pitched voice that sounded nothing like hers.
Watching him levitate two cups and a milk carton towards the coffee table, she replied, "Not my fault, I was a primed princess 'till 93—then I stumbled into ya. It's all been downhill ever since."
Sirius snorted, "Yeah, sure. And I'm not the current winner of the Witch Weekly's Most Charming Smile Award."
"Oh, no… Please tell you're taking the mickey…" Maia looked physically defeated at the news.
"Since 00s, babey—it should've been sooner, but you know, with Harry being a Hero and everything… People weren't voting fairly," he rolled his eyes fondly, and then gesturing to a few parchments laid on the table, asked, "George just put those down… Are those the contacts?"
With a sigh, she explained, "It's just some letters. M'not even sure if I should send it or not, but it's better than whatever we've tried before."
Better is even an understatement, since the two times she'd tried to see her friends before… Well, 'well' wouldn't be the first adjective she would've used to describe it.
The first time was in St. Mungus, where she was committed after she was taken from Madam Pomfrey's care.
Not that the matron wasn't good enough to handle her case, but that was what she was at the end of it all; a case. And cases have to be watched over by the Ministry, so she had a special secluded room where she stayed for days, and days there.
Since they didn't know to which extent the travelling had compromised Maia's body, they tried to heal her with the least magic they could — in order to not provoke any subsequent side effect that they had no idea that could even exist. What all of that meant, in the end, was that her recovery was just as slow and painful as one of a muggle in a non-wizard hospital.
The first few times she'd woken up, still groggy and out of her mind, luckily Sirius was always the one to be by her side—except once, back at Hogwarts. But when she had woken up for real, she didn't think she was that lucky any more.
Saying 'lucky' like that made Maia sounds like some kind of ungrateful bitch who despised her friends. But it wasn't like that; when she had woken up to the sound of those familiar voices speaking over each other, her entire body instantly calmed down. If she still wasn't kinda out of it, her face would have split into the biggest smile known to men.
Opening her eyes, so she could greet her friends, she closed them almost instantly, as the harsh white light blinded her momentarily.
"Maybe if you had an—Oh, bloody hell!"
"Do not 'bloody hell' me, Weasley."
Wait, 'Weasley'? She didn't quite recognize that voice… Maybe it was one of the boys' older brothers. Maia blinked a few times, trying to see past the blurred figures moving in front of her. She mentally chuckled when she saw some red blobs; look at that, there were Weasleys there alright.
"What? No, I'm— You? What? No—it's Badger... She's awake!"
"Oh, bloody hell!"
All the blobs stopped in their place like a statue, and turned their heads towards her. Well, at least they were blocking out the blinding light, though Maia.
"Is this some type of Wizard heaven, or did Hermione just said a bad word?" Maia croaked, regretting it almost instantly as she felt her dry throat chiding her. What had they been giving her all this time, knives for potions?
A weird silence stretched on, telling Maia that something wasn't quite right… God, what else had happened? She remembers Sirius promising her before that they had once, and that everything was OK now. That they were safe.
"Here, Peanut."
Speaking of Sirius, the man touched her arm and placed a glass of water into her opened hand. Maia gave him a small smile in a silent thanks, thinking instantly that no water will ever taste as good as the one she's just had.
The notorious loud laugh of one of the twins reverberated through the walls, after an unusual time lag.
"Godric, it really is Badger!"
His words appeared to snap the group out of the trance they found themselves in, leaving Maia even more confused, when instead of loud chattering, sounds of cries and sniffles broke inside her room.
Maia turned to Sirius, feeling her vision sharpen with each blink, "What happen—" Her mouth got stuck in the same place, as she turned her eyes back to where her friends were standing. Except, they weren't her friends.
Very similar, sure… A well done trick, she mused, practically identical. Well, if you ignored the small age error… but scarily similar, indeed…
As in a flash, Mad-Eye's voice echoed in her head. "Constant Vigilance!" And that was all it took for her to get out of her daze.
"What song did I used to sing in 5th year, that annoyed you to no end?"
Gasps echoed through the room.
"Fuck—"
The man who looked like an adult version of Harry Potter visually crumpled at the implications of the question. "Merlin, I- I… You… Ironic, it's 'Ironic'… Sorry, I—I can't be here."
Pleased with the answer, Maia lowered her wand, getting concerned the moment adult Harry walked out of the door with a pained expression on his face. Someone she guessed as older Ginny, followed him, the thud of the door closing being the only sound in the room.
Everyone continued looking at her with tears pooling in their eyes, an expectant expression on their sullen faces.
Not the welcoming she was hoping for, that's for sure. Maia expected some bone crushing hugs first, that would definitely compromise her stitches; some kind words later, and after all that, a brief of everything that had happened while she was out of it. Probably much later, she would've asked about the grim details—no, who she was kidding? She'd take the hugs, the words, and would straight up demand to know of the bad stuff.
But she still wanted that first few seconds of joy, firstly.
"I can't believe you're still testing your new products on noncompliant students, George," she gestured towards the rest of the people in the room. "Although, I should give you guys the congratulations. It's looking immaculate."
They had outdone themselves, Maia thought, an impeccable work indeed. A more well-crafted ageing potion since the ones they had concocted for the Triwizard Tournament. But she still she couldn't understand the reason for testing it today, well, it's not like they knew she was going to wake up at this exact moment, anyway. Maia reckoned that after everything, the last thing they'd want was to become the twin's Guinea pigs for the day — something more like a few years' of rest, a nice holiday in a warmer country, seemed more in favour in her opinion.
George cocked his head to the side, trying to understand what exactly she meant by that.
"Uh?"
Looking around, it suddenly clicked, and like someone had thrown a bucket of freezing water on top of his head, he managed to mutter a, "N—no, that was…"
Knowing the younger man wouldn't be able to finish his sentence, Remus, that was sitting on her other side, pulled her attention to him. Holding one of her hands, she gave her a sad, but comforting smile, and said, "Maia, I think it's time for us to have a little talk…"
So they explained.
Seventeen years had passed since the Battle, they had said; after they couldn't seem to find her body, but some of her belongs on the floor, next to a pool of blood, they presumed her missing—and then, dead… Then they added way too much information about things she could not comprehend, or didn't want to. Following the rushed explanations, they finished at where they were now: with her in St Mungus, after suddenly appearing in the castle years later, alive and still young, with no explanation still, whatsoever.
Maia for sure thought that they were just pulling a prank on her, she even laughed a bit as if to say, 'Ha ha, you're a bunch of assholes, but I can appreciate the level of effort you've put into it'. But they didn't laugh along with her, in fact, they seemed to get even more distressed by her reaction. It was then that the girl started to get worried, the weight in her stomach getting heavier and heavier.
It couldn't be… She wasn't that unlucky, I mean… But they wouldn't be so cruel to her for giggles, that wasn't how her friends were. Sure, George and Fred could be mean sometimes, but never with her like that…
Remus squeezed her hand, with concern. And that was all Maia needed to properly collapse back into her bed.
After that disastrous day, she only tried to meet them once.
The idea was simple, comfortable: a simple dinner with her old group of friends, plus Remus and Sirius. The latter was going to host it in his new-not-new cottage, where Maia had been staying since she got released from St Mungus. As stated by Snuffles, they'd have enough food and alcohol to try to alleviate any feelings of awkwardness that could, and would, come given the situation.
The entire gang was there, uh, everyone who had previously survived the War — Maia had been learning to used vaguer words, or not to be specific in her sentences, at least while talking to others. Because they either corrected her, or she could feel them trying to stop themselves from correcting her, and all of it sucked too much.
The first ten minutes weren't so bad, if you were one of those people who didn't mind awkward small talks. Exactly like those you were obligated to have with your exs, that you broke amicably, but couldn't act normal with them again.
They asked her about how her recovery was going, how she was feeling, if she was well established in Sirius' place and if it was too weird living with him again. And Maia answered, stiffly, that her recovery was going smoothly, thank you very much; that, yes, she was settled, and that living with Sirius was just as normal as the last time… she had literally spent Yule, and the days prior Gringotts' robbery at his house, with him… That one in particular brought all the weirdness back in one go, together with the pitying looks that seemed to be stamped on their faces, ever since she started talking.
To hit the nail in the coffin, Hermione then corrected her after a few silent beats, reminding her that those two situations had happened, guess what… seventeen years ago.
Following that, it became hard for them to drive the conversation to a path which would easy the tension. Maia began to wonder why they even tried, anyway. To her, this dinner would be just like any other meal she's had with her old pals; where they would chat, and drink, and forget the bad of the world. And for the adults, they just wanted to spend any time with her, awkward or not, difficult or not. But even so, you could never appease both sides.
Maia would never have a normal time with her friends again. Not like before, not like it has always been... They weren't the same, and everything revolved around the fact that this was the future—present now, and that it didn't matter where she went, or what topic they decided to stay on; that would never change.
Nothing here was hers.
She plainly didn't belong with them—anyone, anywhere, any more.
In the end, tired of the piercing eyes that didn't leave her for even a second—a contrast to her own, that looked everywhere but them; Maia lied, saying she needed to go to the loo, and then managed to lock herself in her new room. Not even leaving for dinner itself.
Subsequent of those fiascos, she began to pretend their letters weren't reaching her, that she never read those invitations, that she didn't listen to their voices downstairs asking Sirius about her… and leaving to spend time apart at her sister's really did fund a deeper wall between them.
She wouldn't exactly call it an ideal situation. Being honest, Maia didn't know where to stand, since she also desperately wanted to see them. In all of her almost eighteen years of life, she doesn't remember a time when she had gone so long without communicating with her friends in any way, shape or form. This was hurting her as well, but she was far too gone in her head to try and change it.
The problem was that she didn't want those… Maia didn't want those versions of her friends. She wanted hers, the ones back in '98, the ones who didn't have an entire life ahead of hers; the ones who knew her, the ones who she knew.
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A/N: Or I'd throw myself onto everyone without a thought, or I'd be angry, and resentful, and just so miserable like Maia if that happened to me. No in-between. I'm sensitive, and have a tendency to grieve over things that never happened, or things that could've happened... I can never relate to character who go through those easily. Anyone else? lol