Broken Glass
Relena
If anybody reads this I want to tell first hand that this is not my diary or my explanation but my escape. I never was good at much all though so many people used to call me queen Relena sometimes it just doesn't feel right. It doesn't feel right for many things for one I don't think of myself as a queen if I was I would have never would have let the world go into war and mabie I would have find more ways to prevent this happening. But I must say that I also don't think of myself as a queen because I felled in love with a terrorist. Yes, Heero Yuy all though must of you may know him and may think of him as a cold blooded killer I don't see him like that. Heero Yuy is nothing but a victim of what many years of war and suffering can do for a person, he is a victim of what happens when a world tries to do anything to reserve peace. For that I must say we could not blame him for what he has become or transform too. I love Heero with all my heart and at the same time I feel sorry for him, he has forgotten his humanity and sometimes the ability to feel. How he feels for me is irrelevant it probably can never be measured and its not his fault. I can swear myself to give Heero all my love and all the happiness that no man has got in a lifetime but is still doesn't matters because he can't tell the difference anymore. And I know is this worlds fault and I hate it for it, but I also know that is my duty as a pacifist to prevent this from happening ever again and let more people to suffer the lost of what I lost once. Today when we beat Marinea and I had Heero in my arms for that short period of time I thought that mabie there could be hope and somewhere along victory we might have been able to find happiness but I was wrong. Today I watched sadly how my love left for the last time and I thought of ways of how to make this work out again. But I got to the conclusion that If I wait for Heero to come back I am just going to wait forever and I cannot do that as much as I want to so I made the decision to walk away and mabie at one point life will cross us back again. May this be to a lesson to all of you that love and victory can never come from war and my advice for the world is to never get in more battles they are useless and they bring more suffering that what it is to bear. For now the only thing I have said that the endless waltz have ended and I am going to spend the rest of my lifetime to make sure of that and I hope with you hearing this words will going me in my quest for ever lasting peace. I know is not going to be easy and we are going to make a few mistakes along the way but I swear for all that I love that people like Heero Yuy will never exist again and that is final.
Heero
Today I walked away from her and I know along the way I did the right thing. Relena deserves more than me and I am sure that once time goes by people will be lead to eternal peace by her. I really don't know if I love Relena that world is much to complicated for myself to understand but I do admire her dearly. She is a powerful woman so powerful that she fights battles with words instead of guns and warheads and in her battles nobody winds up dead. Now that I think is the definition of a true warrior, she has more capacity that probably every other human being. But we come from such different worlds that it is impossible for any of us to accomplish our dreams. She has beautiful ones eternal piece and prosperity to the world and somehow I want those dreams to come true. But as long as I am around her I know that those dreams can never come true. Why? I am a warrior that's all that I know and mabie that's all that I ever will know, my place is in the battle field out there with the other soldiers fighting probably to the end of time. I don't belong in Relena's world and mabie I never will that is why today I walked out on her. Were am I going or what will it be on me well I myself don't have those answers but mabie I will as long as I carry on. This feeling for Relena for me is all like a glass it is beautiful at the beginning but so fragile that it may break easily and when it does it does never take the shape it once had. For now I just wish farewell and an this time is forever or mabie not so long because. Well there is this, this water coming out of my eyes and I don't know what this feeling is but I will come back as soon as I find out so mabie is not all lost…