October, 1998

The following days were different from the last. Instead of the comforting blanket of companionship that Draco had leaned upon throughout the last week, he was confronted once more by solitude. The silence was awful and all-encompassing, punctuated by the occasional moments when he would turn on Harry's stereo in the kitchen just so he could feel a bit less alone. He filled the empty hours of the day in the best way that he could, studying his healing textbooks, fixing odds and ends around Harry's house, beginning to peel off some of the awful, enchanted wallpaper in Harry's entryway that began to grow itself back as soon as a section of it was removed.

Harry would come home each evening with an unparalleled exuberance not unlike that of a new puppy, telling Draco all about his scouting endeavors and what leads he had found. He would follow the suppliers that Draco had described as they went about their days, using the invisibility cloak as he traced their steps into Knockturn Alley, Muggle London, and other places of residency where they conducted their routes. He always went into detail about what he thought this meant for the case, and what his game plan would be for the following day. Draco would pour a cup of tea for both of them, clenching the handle of his teacup so Harry couldn't see how distraught he was about this whole arrangement.

Harry was clearly thrilled to have a purpose once again, to be getting out of the house on a regular basis, but all Draco could think about was the terrible ways in which he might hear of Harry's death at the hands of Delev, or someone else that Harry shouldn't have been trailing as closely as he was. He rifled through the newspaper each morning after Harry left, and let out a deep breath of relief when he heard the front door unlatch each evening. It was terrifying, living this way, but Draco kept telling himself that this was temporary – they wouldn't be stuck in this predicament forever. The thought of being together without any of the external factors that were threatening both of their lives was what he used to propel himself through the hardest of days.

Every night Harry pulled Draco tightly into an embrace as though he had been able to read his mind. They cleaned together, prepared meals together, watched muggle television together, held each other as they slept. It made the long waiting hours of the morning worth it to Draco. It was beginning to feel more normal, more comfortable than he had ever known.

After nearly two weeks of Harry consistently following the suppliers around and trying to gather as much evidence as he could each and every day, Draco decided to propose a different course of action for the day.

He perched on the kitchen counter as Harry chopped vegetables for their omelets that morning, swaying his legs back and forth slightly as he watched each movement, the muscles on Harry's forearms flexing and relaxing. Harry must have felt Draco's eyes lingering on him a bit more than usual, because he stopped what he was doing after a few minutes.

"What is it?" Harry said, pausing halfway through an onion to look at Draco.

"Nothing," Draco said, already feeling like it wasn't a wise decision to bring this up.

"It's not nothing," Harry insisted, knowing Draco well enough now to know when something was bothering him. "What are you thinking?"

Draco looked into his eyes, wondering if this was worth asking, or if it would throw off the equilibrium of their relationship at the moment. Deciding after a couple moments of contemplation that it did matter enough to him, Draco pressed his eyes shut and spoke.

"I think we should go see my mum today," Draco said. He paused and waited for an objection from Harry, and when none came, he pressed on. "I've been thinking about it for a while, I think if I can wear your cloak, you can stand lookout by the door and we should be able to get by undetected."

Harry looked earnestly into Draco's face, and Draco could see his green eyes deep in thought, the gears spinning in his head. They both knew how dangerous this was. This had been a mistake.

"Are you sure?" He asked Draco, placing the knife down on the counter. "I know we talked about it, but after seeing Bennett at the club I didn't think that you wanted -"

"I do," Draco nodded in earnest. "I have to." He didn't say the unspoken truth, which was that he wouldn't be able to live with himself if something were to happen to her and he had missed this much of her final days. He had to at least let her know that he was there for her, that somebody still cared.

Harry turned on the faucet, running his knife under the blade and then grabbing a towel off the counter where Draco sat.

"That's…" He said, his brow furrowing as he regarded the plan for a moment. "We can do that. If you really want to."

"I know it's risky," Draco qualified, noting Harry's hesitation to go along with his plan. "It'll be quick, I promise. Just in and out, and we don't have to speak to anyone else."

Harry nodded, entwining his fingers with Draco's as Draco sat upon the counter.

"You're right, you should see her," Harry agreed, making Draco's rapidly beating heart slow to a manageable pace. "I told you we would find a way, and we will. We're clever and we have the cloak. It won't be that hard."

"Well, you're alright I guess. Thankfully I'm clever enough for both of us," Draco said, smiling as he squeezed Harry's hands.

"Don't you start with me, Malfoy," Draco was granted the full dimple grin for that remark, which wiped clean almost all of the anxiety he had been having about this. "I can always take it back!"

…

They apparated into an alley outside St. Mungo's, Harry taking care to look up and down the block several times to make sure they weren't spotted by anyone. Draco was fully concealed by the invisibility cloak, and trailed Harry's movements closely as they had practiced before they left, always trying to stay within a couple feet of him so that Harry could protect him if he needed to. They walked briskly through the abandoned storefront, Harry nodding at the witch behind the front counter and striding right past her to the stairwell so they could get to the fourth floor. He was merely inches away from the door when someone called his name from the foyer. He swore in an undertone, releasing the doorknob and turning around.

"Harry Potter?" The voice repeated. It was a healer in the traditional white robes of the hospital, with wispy, amber colored hair and an expression of confusion upon her face. "We've been trying to get a hold of you for weeks," she said.

"Oh?" Harry replied, because he didn't have the option of ignoring her. There were witnesses, after all.

"Yes, the outpatient program you were enrolled in began back in September. Kingsley Shacklebolt himself guaranteed us that you would be here, we've been sending letters and trying to find you at the ministry since your referral."

Draco heard Harry take a deep breath, and could tell he was trying to suppress some of the anger that had just bubbled up to the surface.

"Er…" Harry said, clearly not knowing how to handle this particular obstacle. "There must have been a mistake. I don't… I didn't enroll myself. I'm really fine, Kingsley just said I needed some rest, so once I'm back to normal everything should be alright. Why don't you just tell Kingsley you saw me and everything is good," he finished, turning around and heading towards the stairwell once more.

"I'm not going to do that, Mr. Potter," the witch persisted, and Draco watched Harry's eyes roll practically into his skull. "The ministry mandated this course for your return to your position, and it's our duty to ensure that -"

"I don't need a healer," Harry pressed. Draco could feel him getting more and more agitated by the moment. "It's a waste of time, and I've told Kingsley as much, I'll be back on my feet in a couple weeks. Just cancel my enrollment. Please."

The witch raised an eyebrow at Harry, not appearing to be moved by this claim.

"I'm afraid I'm under direct orders," She said, her tone a little sharper now.

"It's not like your lot were doing anything after I fought Voldemort the first time, when I was 14," Harry's fists were clenched, and Draco desperately wished he could urge Harry to just leave it, just submit to the examination without causing a scene. "Or watched Sirius Black die, or even Dumbledore, for that matter. No, you only care because you're following orders, and I'm just another checkbox for you to mark off."

"If you won't submit to an examination willingly, I'm sorry to say that we'll have to do an involuntary hold. It's for your own good, Mr. Potter."

Draco reached through the cloak to touch the small of Harry's back, in a way that he hoped was soothing, trying to indicate that this was neither the time nor the place for Harry to start listing off all his problems with ministry-appointed healers.

It seemed to have worked, because Harry paused instead of charging at the nurse, breathing in slowly and collecting himself.

"You know what?" Harry said, his tone a bit calmer now. Draco was sure he hadn't changed his mind, he was just picking his battles. "Fine. If it'll get you to leave me alone, fine. I'll do it."

"Thank you, Mr. Pott -"

"You should find one person who's been through half of what I have, though, and ask them how goddamn well they sleep at night."

The healer did not look taken aback in the slightest. It seemed as though she was used to reactions of this sort in her line of work.

"Mr. Potter, I'm a professional. My job is to ensure that our patients receive the care they need, and I will not be spoken to as such for following direct orders from the minister."

"Alright," Harry said, in a tone that very much indicated nothing about this was alright. He looked like he had just lost a fight. "Sure. I'll see the healer." He followed the witch across the room and then muttered in a whisper intended for Draco, "Doesn't seem like I have much of a fucking choice."

"We're up on the second floor, Mr. Potter," she said. If she had heard that last part, she had chosen to ignore it. "Follow me."

Harry granted a last, desperate look at the stairwell entrance where he knew Draco to be, then followed the witch through the lobby to the elevators. Draco used this opportunity where no one was looking his way to open the door and steal up the staircase, climbing to the fourth floor while keeping himself still fully covered under the cloak.

…

The second Draco entered the waiting room, he felt his heart sink to the bottom of his stomach.

Sitting in the chair that he had last seen occupied by Bennett when he had come to the hospital in June was a tall, burly man that Draco instantly recognized as one of Delev's bodyguards from the night he had gone to the hotel in London. Draco let the door close behind him a little too carelessly, and the man squinted as it clattered shut, clearly not being opened by any visible person. Draco froze dead in his tracks, not wanting to move, not even wanting to breathe for fear of being discovered. He should have known better than to come here, he should have guessed that Delev would have planted his cronies in the one place that he would be most likely to visit.

A small girl and her mother emerged through the hallway, chattering loudly and carrying platters that had probably contained a meal when they had visited the hospital. As they made their way towards the elevators Draco seized the opportunity to walk across the floor in their wake, keeping his footsteps close to theirs so as to avoid suspicion from the man in the chair.

He hurried down the hallway when he had passed the man, breaking out into a run while there was nobody directly in his field of vision. The thrill of being unseen, passing by without anyone realizing it was exhilarating, elating even. He hadn't heard the whole story from Harry, but he had mentioned in passing that this cloak was unlike other cloaks of its kind, that it was completely foolproof and did not need regular upkeep spells like most enchanted artifacts Draco was accustomed to. It was lifting his spirits in a way that he wondered if Harry had gotten used to by now.

He retraced the footsteps he had made several times while visiting his mother in this wing, however when he got to her door, it was eerily opened wide, lit only by the rays of light coming through the high window. The bed was sterile, the coverings folded neatly and stacked in the middle of the mattress. The walls around her bed that used to hold cards, letters and scribbled pictures were bare, as though she had never been in the room at all.

She wasn't here. She was gone from her room, he didn't know if she was even in the hospital. But she couldn't be dead… He wouldn't have missed something like that. He had been pouring over the obituaries every day in the paper, terrified to stumble across her name, but he hadn't ever found it. So where was she, if she wasn't in her room? Was she living in London? Had she been trying to find him?

He remembered with another twinge of fear the man who had been sitting in the waiting room when he had walked in, and realized again what his presence indicated. She had to be here still, if someone was baiting a trap for Draco to come visit her. She must be in a different part of the hospital, but she was still here on this floor. He was sure of it.

He stepped back into the hallway, glancing around to make sure that there was still no one in sight, and walked slowly towards the intake desk. The witch who normally sat at reception had stepped away from her post for the time being, and it would be the perfect opportunity for him to scour through the index to find where his mother was.

A loud cough from the man caused Draco to jump, and he had to remind himself once more that he couldn't be seen, that he was safe as long as he was silent. He used his hands to inch his way back behind the desk to the large binder resting upon it.

The door to the stairwell opened once more, and another, somehow even larger man who could only be one of Delev's entered the room. He nodded in acknowledgement of the seated man, glancing around at the room.

They began to talk in hushed voices, a couple of their words jumping out at Draco, but he had no time for eavesdropping. He had to get out of here as soon as possible. He slid the intake binder off the desk and carefully began turning the pages so as to not make any noise. He flipped to the "M's" and found the page with his mother, seeing immediately that his suspicions were confirmed. She was still here, but her room number indicated that she was now located in the North Wing, and a suite number accompanied the annotation. There was a note at the bottom of the page that had been affixed to the book: "Moved to the North Wing at the request of Andromeda Tonks. Please use as primary contact in case of emergency."

Draco almost forgot about Delev's men in the lobby as he heaved a sigh of relief. His mother was being taken care of. Her sister was coming to see her, and Andromeda had surely paid to have her moved to a different room.

So much of Draco's anxiety around his mother being in St. Mungo's was due to the fact that she wasn't around any of her old friends and family, those who weren't in prison or distancing themselves from the family because of what the tabloids were saying about Draco. Knowing that his aunt was coming here, no doubt because of what Draco had asked of her back at the cottage, made him feel like he had at least done one small thing right throughout this whole, earth-shattering ordeal. Maybe the fact that she had been moved to a different room was a positive sign, maybe she was improving. She might not be confined to this place for the rest of her life, as he had feared she would.

He was about to shut the binder when he couldn't help recognizing a name towards the front of the book as he flipped it shut. He stopped dead in his tracks, feeling the familiar cold terror wash over him once again.

"Mitchell Bennett. Admitted for spell damage due to excessive torture. Attacked at the Library of the London Institute for Magical Law."

He froze, rooted to the spot. His legs suddenly felt as though they were made of lead, rendering him completely unable to move. They had tortured Bennett. It was what he had feared they would do, but he had no idea it would come to this, to him being admitted into a hospital because of something Draco had done. His mind began spiraling, imagining worst case scenarios, thinking of what they might have done to him. The word "excessive" used in reference to the torture that he had endured clanged in Draco's head like a cymbal, its connotations turning his blood to ice inside his veins.

Draco was directly responsible for this. The body count for the decisions he had made just kept rising, and with it rose his uncertainty that anything would ever be back to normal. Whatever normal looked like, anyways.

He thought of the glowing fairy lights on Harry's mantel, the roaring fire in the hearth, about Harry making him breakfast each morning, the way his arms wrapped around Draco as they slept each night. All he wanted was to be back in Harry's home, the two of them falling into their routines and not worrying at all about what was going on in the world outside. He wished he had never gotten wrapped up in any of Delev's operations, that he had never met Bennett. He wished more than anything that he didn't have this baggage reminding him of his mistakes every time he blinked, and he didn't have to hide under an invisibility cloak when he was trying to see his mother. Every time he tried to start over, his past would catch up with him and remind him that this happiness he felt with Harry, however temporary it lasted, was not intended for him. It was made for someone else, someone who deserved it. He was deluding himself if he thought that Harry could genuinely love him, that the two of them had a future together. All that he had room for in his future was regret.

He closed the book, but not before noting the room number. He knew the last thing he should be doing was visiting Bennett, that the whole reason he had come here was to see his mother, that Harry was risking his own safety to help him accomplish this, but somehow his compulsion to see what they had done to Bennett overtook whatever rational thoughts had been present when he had entered this hospital.

Making sure the invisibility cloak fell to the floor and completely obscured his feet, he carefully tread to the other side of the desk and back down the open hallway. The men didn't stir as he passed them, both of them looking bored, tired even. Draco wondered how long they had been posted here, if they had been here since the day Delev realized he ran off with thousands of galleons worth of illegal elixir.

There was a ticking clock in his head punctuating his steps, counting down every second and telling him he had to get out of here before he was discovered, before Harry wandered up to the fourth floor and Delev's men put all the pieces together and realized where Draco was hiding. He knew he shouldn't be wasting time on this, but he had to know what had happened. He had to know if Bennett had told them anything.

He was the only patient in the room. When Draco closed the door behind him and slid off the invisibility cloak, Bennett looked up from the book he was reading in interest, recognized Draco, and then his expression turned cold, stone-like. He didn't look injured on the surface; his face was as clean as ever and he still wore his spectacles to help him read, but Draco knew from his experience with his mother that spell damage didn't have to leave an external mark to be deadly.

"You shouldn't be here," he said. "This is probably the worst place for you to be right now."

"I need to know what happened."

"How did you even get past the men in the lobby?"

"Ben, I don't have much time. What did they do to you? Did you tell them anything?"

Bennett stared at Draco, a long, silent look which seemed to be sizing him up, trying to determine how much he knew.

"I didn't tell them anything," he said, slowly. "I don't know anything, do I?"

Draco felt a surge of relief, but also another pang of guilt for what had been done to Bennett. They both knew that he was staying with Harry, that he hadn't even done the best job covering his tracks. It was probably only a matter of time until they found him.

"The doctors think I'll make a full recovery," Bennett said, "But listen, Draco, I mean it, it's more dangerous than you realize."

"Good," Draco nodded. Bennett was going to be ok. Less blood on his hands. "Good, I'm glad it's not –"

"-Draco, listen," Bennett interrupted, a look of sincere concern on his face. "You can't come here anymore, they only kept me alive as bait for you. You don't know what kind of people you're dealing with, this is bigger than just you and the silly games you're playing with Potter."

Draco frowned.

"I'm not playing any games–"

"Please, whatever you do," he pressed, a look of irritation replacing the surprised expression he wore before. "Just don't… come here. You shouldn't be seeing your mother, you shouldn't be anywhere near this place. You have to trust me."

There was a part of Draco that felt defensive, that didn't want to accept orders from Bennett, even now. He felt like he was being treated like a foolish schoolboy, a child with a knack for mischief instead of the calculated, protective person he had grown to become since he had first met Bennett.

"I'm being careful, Ben, I'm not waltzing around them seeing who can catch me first."

"You're not being careful, though, because you're here." His voice was stern, admonishing. For the first time in a while Draco felt a twinge of fear when he heard Bennett take that tone, remembering for a moment that he had once thought Bennett reminded him of his father.

"Do you have any idea," Bennett continued, turning to face Draco in his bed. He grimaced as he did so, pulling his limbs across the sheets as though they were those of a marionette doll. "Do you know what they did to me? Because they were trying to find you?"

"Ben, I'm sorry," Draco said softly, remembering again why Bennett was here. Bennett ignored him, continuing on as though he hadn't heard Draco.

"I don't even know what kind of trouble you've got yourself in, but you don't have any idea who these people are, and what they would do if they found you. They won't just kill you, Draco. They'll flay your loved ones in front of you, they'll make you deliver the final blow, and then they'll take you apart piece by piece. All over the span of several weeks. It's sick… it's horrible. It's the worst thing you could imagine."

Draco swallowed, suddenly having the feeling that maybe he and Bennett weren't talking about the same thing.

"Ben, this is just about laethelixir, I stole some product I was supposed to sell, it's surely not anything that crazy…"

"Draco, no," Bennett said, his eyes growing wide. "It's not, it's so much bigger than that." He looked down at his hands, which Draco could now see had burn marks on the palms.

"I don't know everything they're doing, but it's not just drugs. That's only the tip of the iceberg. They're using a mansion in the middle of the woods – I couldn't tell where it was, based on where they apparated with me. There's no roads, hardly any gaps in the trees, nothing but woods. They take muggles and bring them there… they torture people, wizards and muggles alike… So many people…"

Draco felt as though someone had shoved his head into a bucket of ice water.

"But how did you –"

"If they hadn't thought you'd come looking for me they would have killed me too. Buried me underground with the rest. They left me sprawled on the road in the middle of London, I had to find a stranger and have them bring me to the storefront so I could be admitted."

"Ben," Draco said, a lump risen in his throat. The gravity of Bennett's words was slowly sinking in, all of the alarm bells pinging at once in Draco's mind. "I had no idea… I didn't know -"

"The elixirs are part of it, but they're doing something else, something dark."

"Do you know what kind of -" Draco started, but Bennett interrupted him, holding an index finger quickly to his mouth. They could both hear footsteps shuffling down the hallway.

"Put the cloak back on," Bennett said urgently. "You have to leave, now."

"But my mother -"

"Draco, if you love her, you will leave her alone. When the nurses open the door, slip through and go straight to the elevator. Do not open any other doors. Do you understand me?"

Draco nodded, even though his head was spinning with questions, even though he had no idea what Bennett was talking about or what all of this even meant. He stood behind the door so he could leave through it when it opened, and glanced at Bennett again. Bennett's expression softened, and even though he couldn't see Draco's face, he offered him a slight smile.

"It's going to be ok," he offered in a soft voice. "Stay with Harry, and keep your nose clean. Don't go digging around for answers. It's too dangerous."

"What's going to happen to you?" Draco asked, remembering that Bennett said he was only here to lure Draco to the hospital. "What if they can't find me?"

"They won't hurt me here," Bennett said, with more confidence than Draco expected. "I'll be fine." Another smile, this one accompanied by a fresh wave of guilt that had nothing to do with Delev's men.

Draco remembered what it was like to be smiled at, to be reassured by this man, and a wave of nostalgia carried him back to the summer after 6th year, when he had been so desperately looking for any kind of solace, anything to make life seem like it was worth living. His parents had been so closed off, so preoccupied with everything that was going on with the dark lord, and Draco had taken any opportunity he could to escape to Bennett's place. He had felt truly loved, appreciated and understood for the first time in his life whenever he went there. It was only later that he saw the cracks in their relationship, the age difference, the unbalanced power dynamic, Bennett's constant need to control him, which Draco knew he was even doing now to a certain extent. But wasn't all of this Draco's own fault? Bennett's life was now in danger because of him; he was the one that was in the wrong right now. It was hard to sit here and say Bennett had been the one making mistakes when he was the one who had been too impulsive, too reckless.

The footsteps grew closer to the room until he heard heels click outside the door, and just as Bennett had predicted, a healer came into the room with a tray of food and what looked to be enough medicine to tranquilize a horse.

"How are we feeling today?" She asked, setting the tray down on his side table. Draco took the moment to slip through the open door as Bennett had told him to do, making sure not to make any loud movements.

"About the same as yesterday," he heard Bennett's voice say down the hallway. He tread silently down the corridor, taking a right when he got to the lifts. Mercifully one of the lifts remained ajar from when the healer had used it, so he slid right into it and as soon as it closed he exhaled a breath he hadn't realized he had been holding for the better part of an hour.

…

He and Harry had agreed that they would meet at home if they got split up, so as soon as he made it outside the hospital he apparated straight onto the doorstep of 12 Grimmauld Place. He let himself inside with his spare key and pulled off Harry's invisibility cloak, collapsing into the first chair he could find in the sitting room. To his surprise, he heard Harry's voice from the kitchen, calling his name.

"What are you doing back here before me?" He asked, leaning his head back in the chair to watch Harry bring a couple mugs of tea into the sitting room. "Don't you have Ministry mandated therapy?"

"It actually went pretty quick," Harry said, shrugging. "They forced me to go, but they can't force me to talk. They had to examine my wand, do a full wellness check, and around the time they started asking me about 'the horrors I experienced in the war' I just told them what they wanted to hear for about 10 minutes and then came straight home. They can't keep me there involuntarily if I'm not a danger to anyone."

Draco almost laughed, in spite of everything that he had just learned in the past hour. He knew the reason Harry was avoiding treatment was probably deeper than he realized, but these boyish antics were just so typical of him that he couldn't help being amused at Harry's nerve.

"I think the better question is what happened to you? You look like you've seen a ghost," Harry sat down in the chair next to Draco and offered him the mug of tea, which Draco accepted, his hands still a little shaky. "Is she alright?"

Draco took a deep breath, looking at the earnest expression on Harry's face and cupping both his hands around the mug of tea.

He wanted to tell Harry the truth, that he had seen Bennett instead of his mother, that he was more shaken than he realized he had been by Bennett's warning. It was the warmth of the room, though, the happiness he felt around Harry which wrapped around him like a soft blanket, that made him think about how easily he could lose all of this. Everything around him could be undone if he mentioned Bennett, if he told Harry the truth about where he had gone. It wasn't even that he had done anything wrong, he was just so terrified of things not being right with Harry, of letting this safety net he had never known before slip through his fingers. He had spent so long imagining what a life with Harry would look like, and now he didn't want to think of the possibility of being without him.

"She's good," he replied, sipping his tea. "She's in a different room, my aunt is checking in on her."

"Did anything else happen?"

"Yeah, just… Delev's men were in the lobby. It… scared me more than I thought it would."

"They didn't see…"

"No," Draco said, shaking his head and clenching the mug of tea with both his hands. The heat of the water was searing through both of his hands. It was a comforting, familiar type of pain that he knew he deserved. He didn't flinch.

"Did anyone see you?" He asked, trying to focus on something besides the heartbreak of having to lie to Harry's face. "Anyone not in the ministry?"

"Not that I'm aware of," Harry said slowly, a strange look upon his face. "Draco, are you alright? You seem… I don't know. Off."

Draco gripped the mug in his hands even tighter. He had to do something, he had to bring up something about his meeting with Bennett. The warning he had issued was bearing down on him, heavier with each passing second. If there was any merit to it, that meant that Harry had to stop prodding around and tailing Delev's men before he got seriously hurt.

"I want you to stop investigating for a couple of days," he blurted, faster than he had been meaning to say it. "I'm worried this might be bigger than we think. I don't want you to get hurt."

Harry looked shocked, and paused for a moment to take in what Draco had said.

"What… What makes you say that?" he asked, a quizzical look on his brow. "Did you see anything else in the wing?"

Draco froze for a moment, his breath halting. Did Harry know about Bennett? Were they playing their own, twisted game with each other right now? He tried his best to discern whether or not Harry could tell what he was asking him, if he knew about what Draco had omitted in his retelling of events tonight.

"No," he said finally, deciding that Harry was too honest for that, it was too hard for him to hide his emotions. He would have been barrating Draco for his stupidity as soon as he had walked through the door if he actually had known what was going on. "No, I just have a bad feeling about this. I think we should just take it easy for a bit."

Harry looked at Draco's trunk, which was still resting in the corner. The proverbial elephant in the room.

"We had a plan," he said, his Adam's apple bobbing as he swallowed. "Until everything's gone, it's… it's not going to be safe for us."

"Harry, it's never been safe. It's not safe now." Draco abandoned his tea on the side table and moved over to Harry's chair, knowing it would be harder for him to fight Draco on this if he was being distracted. He pulled Harry's own mug out of his hands and settled himself upon Harry's lap, one thigh on either side of Harry's waist. He brought Harry's now smiling face up to his with a light finger under his chin.

"You are unbelievable," Harry said, shaking his head, but Draco could tell from the bulge at the front of Harry's pants that he was already winning.

He took advantage of the momentum he had seized and leaned his neck past Harry's head, draping himself around Harry and breathing in Harry's delectable, piney scent. He whispered softly in his ear, "We're safe in here, though. Right here. We should make the most of it while we can."

"You sure have a way of getting what you want," Harry breathed against his neck, bringing Draco's face down to lock eyes with him and then kissing him hard, weaving his fingers into Draco's hair.

Draco moaned in response, grinding his hips against Harry's and doing his best to cast the anxious thoughts out of his head, to show Harry everything would be alright as long as they both stayed right where they were.

"Just think of all the things I could do to you in a week," Draco crooned, sliding a finger up Harry's chest underneath his shirt and issuing a gasp from him. He smiled in response. "All the ways I could make you feel good…"

"Fine, fine!" Harry said, leaning his head back against the chair and laughing. "You win. One week won't kill us I suppose – oh." In the time it had taken Harry to speak, Draco had sunk to his knees and unfastened Harry's trousers. He had begun to suck enthusiastically at Harry's cock, bobbing up and down on the length and keeping his eyes fixed on Harry's face as he did. "Fuuuck that's good," Harry moaned, blinking hard and stretching out his jaw.

Draco only lapped at his cock more eagerly in response, groaning as he took it fully in his mouth and caused Harry to gasp again. Harry's hands, still resting in Draco's hair, were now gripping at his roots, holding him firmly in place.

"Draco you're… You're so amazing…"

"Mhm," Draco said, watching Harry as he began to come undone. This was his favorite part, the part where Harry realized how close he was. The look of concentration upon his face, the determined grip of his fingers on Draco's head, the slight shudder that ran down his body when he met Draco's eyes again and saw how much Draco wanted this. Wanted him.

"Fuck, I'm close… Draco, I'm gonna -" Harry pulled Draco's head as close into him as he could. Draco maintained eye contact with him until the very end, watching as the climax overtook him and the brief look of panic flooded his eyes, then the soft exhale and release, another shudder as Draco's mouth filled with the sweet, tangy result of Harry's pleasure. Draco closed his eyes and relished every drop as he swallowed, running his tongue back over the tip of Harry's cock a couple times to make sure he left nothing behind.

Harry's head came to a rest on the back of the armchair, his eyes closed. A wide, relaxed smile remained on his face as Draco stood up, wiping the corner of his mouth with his hand.

That was how he was going to have to do it. To keep Harry close, to make sure that whatever happened, he was safe, satisfied, and wanting for nothing.

…

It was only afterwards when they were lying in bed together upstairs that Draco realized what he had done.

He had hidden something important from Harry because he was afraid of his reaction, and then he had capitalized on Harry's lust to smooth over his own guilt. It reminded him of what he had done with Bennett, time and time again. There would be a missed step or a perceived slight, then ensuing angry words, followed by transactional sex which would always put Bennett in a better mood. It was Draco's way of atoning for whatever wrongs he had ever committed, of making him seem worthy to whoever he was with at the time. He could feel himself going down that road with Harry, just as he had with the others. The thought filled him with a pit in his stomach, a sense of dread that no amount of reassurance would be able to free him of.

He had to tell Harry, he had no other choice. But when he opened his mouth to speak, no words came out. He couldn't do it. He couldn't risk losing the warm embrace they shared, the feeling of Harry's chest against his back as Harry pulled him tighter into his body.

"I love you," Harry mumbled against his ear, nuzzling his head to fit in the crook of Draco's neck against the pillows.

Draco squeezed Harry's arm that was wrapped around him, scooting his body closer into Harry's.

"I love you too." He fought back the tears that were threatening to fall. He wasn't going to throw this away like every important thing he had in his life before now. He had to find a way to keep Harry safe, to keep this special bond they shared away from the rest of the world. If they could stay in this bed, in this house while life outside Grimmauld Place carried on around them, everything would be okay.

The anxiety crept in as he lay awake, listening to Harry's deep breathing in the bed beside him. He knew in his heart that being safe wouldn't be enough for Harry. It conflicted so much with who Harry was, with his constant need to protect people, to fight anything and everything he could to keep himself and his loved ones safe. He thought again of what Bennett had said, of whether or not he had gotten into something much more deeper than he realized. If he was bringing danger to their doorstep at this very moment.

He thought of his mother, alone in the hospital wing, of how he should have visited her today instead of going anywhere near Bennett. He thought of how much he regretted not seeing her face, letting her know he was still alive, still there for her. His mind raced with the possibilities of what could happen, about Delev's men wandering up and down the halls of the fourth floor, about what bigger, more nefarious operation they might be a part of. He had never known any centralized meeting place when he had worked for Delev; there wasn't any mansion in the woods that he had ever encountered. Bennett was making it sound like they weren't just running a drug ring, that they were killing people too, muggles and wizards alike…

Draco listened for creaks in the floorboards, footsteps on the staircase. He knew this was temporary, knew that he couldn't outrun his demons forever, even with Harry's help. He held Harry's arms close to him throughout the night, clinging to the warmth of his body like a life raft in the perilous waters. He watched the glow of the moonlight through Harry's curtains fade to the yellow dawn of sunlight, lying awake the whole time.