Disclaimer:
I still own nothing, just my crazy ideas.
"Garcia, I'm not going to any stupid costume party."
The blonde woman looked up at him with a smile from the bed as she tossed him his dark jeans to finish dressing.
"It's not a stupid party. It's Reid's birthday. Besides-"
Penelope pulled off the white sheet revealing her naked body and approached him, knowing she had to use all her womanly weapons if she wanted to convince him of that idea.
"It's the first post-covid party. It's a celebration for the return of our boring life"
Luke laughed but shook his head. The truth was that they had finished having sex and yet, he still felt that lump in his throat.
That ball of anxiety that forms in the windpipe and prevents normal breathing. He knew that feeling well. It was jealousy. Pain. Anger. Bad feelings.
Jealousy that sometimes woke him up in the middle of the night. A pain that used to win over his hope in his daily battle. Anger. That was the worst. His heart had too much pent-up anger.
He loved that woman. He loved her as he had not loved anyone in a long time. Luke had managed to be her friend, confidant and sometimes her lover. But he couldn't have what he wanted most from Penelope: her heart.
She had bad experiences with her ex-boyfriends. Penelope swore she had decided that single life made her happier.
No arguments, no explanations. When she wanted to have sex with someone, she just had it. But zero commitment.
Luke Alvez was wrong. He really thought she just needed time. She would realize that they were perfect for each other. In time, he would be more than just her friend. She would end up falling in love with him, the same way he was with her.
But she didn't. She continued to deny Luke that special place in her life. Penelope still only wanted him as a friend. Sometimes, as a hot guy to fuck when she needed to release her stress.
Over the months, Luke became content with the situation. After all, they both had each other. He wasn't looking for any other woman. Penelope stopped looking for men to entertain herself with and gave the left spot in her bed to Luke on an almost permanent basis.
But everything changed since she returned from that trip.
No, actually everything changed before that day. Like about two weeks before. Since David Rossi's retirement party.
He didn't want to accept it, but his brain knew it from the moment that guy set foot in that place.
Penelope's eyes lit up. But not in an affectionate way. They lit up with the gleam that adorned her eyes whenever she was aroused. Her pupils almost covered her caramel-colored irises.
She wanted the man. Luke could tell by the way she bit her lower lip as she listened to him speak. If they had been alone, he was sure she would have pulled down his fucking pants and blow him. Maybe she did it later, when they both disappeared as if by magic.
Luke knew. Of course he knew. She hadn't told him anything but he knew her too well. Penelope had been gone with Derek all weekend. He had no proof but no doubts about it either.
And that was exactly what caused the anger he felt, more and more often. He was no longer the same with her. Penelope had also changed with him. Their chemistry wasn't the same, they didn't look for each other the same. She was drowning in remorse and he was suffocated by jealousy.
Luke felt her hard nipples against his chest as her mouth left wet kisses along his pronounced jawline.
"You got dressed so fast."
He closed his eyes and sighed heavily. His body was on fire but his heart was frozen. He was so hurt that he just wanted to get out of that house.
Luke grabbed her arms to pull her away from him and sat on the edge of the bed. He couldn't keep quiet anymore. He was going to go crazy.
Penelope looked at him quizzically, as he ran his hands through his thick black hair. She had never seen him so downcast, staring at the ground with slumped shoulders. As if he had just lost a heavy battle.
"Luke? Is something wrong?" She asked genuinely concerned. "Baby?"
He looked up. Luckily for him, Penelope had put on the dress she had taken off earlier. He didn't need distractions at that moment.
A sarcastic laugh came from deep in his throat.
"Baby? Am I really your 'baby'?"
She made a confused gesture with her eyebrows. Perhaps she was truly lost with his feelings.
"What was that for? Are you down?"
Penelope knelt in front of him with a tender smile on her face. She clasped his large hands between her much smaller ones, trying to return the comfort he always gave her.
"Baby, I don't know what's in your little head. But whatever it is, I'm here for you. Always."
She left a soft kiss on his lips and grabbed his chin. He lifted his gaze from the floor.
Luke looked at her for a couple of seconds, her blond hair falling on her face and part of her chest. She had it longer than usual and it was really something that made her prettier. Though he still saw her as a beauty. Even on her worst days.
"I love you, Pen. That's it."
She smiled and wrinkled her nose. "I love you too, pretty boy."
He closed his eyes. Luke wasn't much for putting words to feelings and just then he remembered the reason. He feared he was going to start stuttering at any moment. But Penelope had given him a big push forward without intending to.
"You love me but not like you love him, don't you?"
Luke noticed how her body instantly tensed. She let go of his hands and her smile wiped off her face.
"Are you coming to Michael's birthday?"
She stood up and headed for the shower. Luke sighed deeply, dropping onto the mattress. Silent is consent.
"Yeah, sure. I don't think JJ would forgive me if I didn't go."
Children laughs flooded the garden of LaMontagne's house. Their youngest child's birthday deserved a huge party with a bouncy castle and clowns.
Spencer smiled at the attentive gaze of the children, who gawked at the physical magic. They all ran to grab the little cube.
"Uncle!"
A little brown-haired boy with a huge smile came running up to him. He bent down to embrace the kid.
"How are you, buddy?" He ruffled his curly hair. Just as Hank's father had done to him many years before, "You get more handsome every day."
The boy shrugged, still smiling. He gave him a kiss on the cheek and ran off toward the other children.
Spencer smiled broadly. Hank Morgan was the most loving children.
"And Savannah?"
His friend breathed in and twisted his face.
"She had days off and went to visit her sister."
Spencer pursed his lips. He knew something wasn't right in his friend's marriage.
"Are you okay?"
The other man's eyes avoided his gaze for a few seconds. Derek bit his lower lip.
"It's been a week since we signed the divorce."
Spencer raised his eyebrows as his mouth dropped open in surprise. He knew something was wrong. But there was no way his brain could imagine it was that bad.
"I'm so sorry."
"Don't be. It's the best thing we ever did."
Spencer didn't know what to say. He wanted to support the man who had always been a big brother to him. But not really, he didn't know what to say to make Derek feel better.
"Life sucks. If you need anything, you know I'm here for you."
JJ appeared behind her two friends with a dazzling smile. She greeted Derek with a hug, offered him a beer and went on her way. The birthday boy's mom was busy.
Luke and Penelope arrived at the birthday party. She in her turquoise dress and he in a turquoise shirt. They both looked like the perfect couple in that place.
They walked in smiling, their arms around each other's waists. Emily ran over to greet her friend and gave Penelope a kiss on the cheek. The brunette told him some joke that he responded to with a laugh.
The three friends made their way to the table where the rest of the team was. Penelope sat next to Luke, who at the time was having a fake sarcastic discussion with David Rossi.
Derek was still standing in the corner of the garden, right next to the bouncy castle, cold beer in hand. He watched the scene from afar, thinking about how much his life had changed since he decided to leave.
"Feels strange, doesn't it?" Spencer asked, stepping up beside him.
"What?"
"Leaving a place, coming back and then realizing that nothing has changed. Everything remains the same. But there is someone taking the place you vacated."
Derek let out a slight chuckle but didn't say a word. He just took another swig of his beer. The last thing he wanted to do was talk about his feelings. About his life. About himself.
But Spencer Reid was having one of his moments of glorious inspiration. He was not going to shut the fuck up.
"And you realize that whoever joked with you, now jokes with him. And your old sarcasm partner also gives battle to him. And even the woman who had the hot for you, smiles at him. She smiles at him, flirts with him and touches him the same way she did with you."
"Reid, stop profiling me."
"You feel cold. Like you're in a place that no longer belongs to you."
Then there was silence. Derek took the last swig of beer. He had drunk the can in less than ten minutes. He felt like drinking a whole keg. But he wouldn't. That wasn't going to solve anything. And he wouldn't let his son see him drunk.
"But it's not like that, Derek. Emily is still your friend. Rossi is still waiting for your jokes. No one has replaced you. We've just accepted him as one of our family. He's a good guy."
Derek continued to look down at the table, pinning his dark eyes on Penelope.
"Are you sure no one has replaced me?"
Spencer gulped. He couldn't hide that reality.
"That's different. She's a wonderful woman. Penelope is funny, smart, pretty. It was clear that any straight man would want to take your place."
"Yes, you're right"
"I always am."
Derek turned to look his friend in the face. The other man took a sip of his pineapple juice. He smiled. There were things that never changed.
Michael had already blown out the candles and opened all of his presents. Children had already left, except for team's kids.
They were all sleeping in the living room, inside the teepees that JJ and Will had bought for the occasion.
Everyone, except Hank. He hadn't wanted to sleep in his teepee. Morgan's little boy preferred to sleep on Penelope's lap.
And there she was, on the rocker in the garden, with his little head resting on her shoulder. Her arms wrapped around his small body, like a mother bear with her cub. From time to time, Penelope would watch him sleep with a tender smile on her lips. And then she would brush his curly locks away from his forehead or caress his cheeks with her knuckles.
Derek watched the scene from the garden bench, sitting between Emily and Spencer. Luke felt ridiculous. He couldn't be jealous of a barely five years old kid. And he wasn't. He was just uncomfortable with the situation.
The others were still talking and laughing, taking the supposed last drink. He was also talking and laughing but his mind was far enough away from those conversations.
Penelope would never be entirely free. She was always going to be there for Morgan. For his son. That bond was stronger than love. It was as if they were tattooed on each other's skin. As if they were soul mates.
The thought was absurd, but nevertheless, it hurt. It hurt his soul.
So much so, that he felt like getting up and leaving that place.
Derek stood up and walked toward her. Luke wanted to look away but couldn't help it.
He bent down to take his son in his arms.
"Thanks Pen" he whispered, as he covered Hank with his leather jacket "We're going home."
Spencer frowned.
"But we haven't talked about costumes."
Derek looked at him like he had three heads. Emily pulled out her cell and started typing.
"Next week is Spencer's birthday and we've decided to have a superhero themed party."
Spencer smiled, very pleased with himself.
"And they have to be DC characters, nothing from Marvel"
Luke sighed deeply. Great. Another hours-long encounter with Derek Morgan. But the guy had been very nice to him from day one and he was a good friend of his. He didn't deserve any kind of rebuff.
"Okay, I've written all the DC characters in this app. It's a roulette wheel, you know how it works." Emily explained, placing her Iphone on the garden table. "Click on the screen. The roulette will spin and give you the result."
She took a swig of her whiskey, tapping her index finger on the screen. Emily did a little dance when the app told her she had to dress up as WonderWoman.
The woman was already somewhat affected by alcohol and responded euphorically to her friends' costumes.
It was Penelope's turn. She looked at the screen and smiled mischievously toward Luke.
"I'm going to be Harley Queen, do you want to be my Puddin'?"
He smiled in response, deep down enjoying her folly. She sat on his lap and kissed him unexpectedly. Luke could hear Emily's loud laughs just a few feet away from them.
"Go to a hotel, you perverts."
Luke broke the kiss. Her lips tasted like cherry mixed with rum. Her kisses were delicious. But it awakened things in him that should remain private.
"Behave yourself, chica."
"Or what, you'll spank me?"
For some reason, everyone fell silent for a few seconds. Even her smile froze on her face. But she quickly went back to being her.
"You're going to be my green-haired joker."
Luke watched as Derek looked at her, dead serious. But he didn't look angry. He looked sad. Very sad.
"Morgan, touch the fucking screen." Emily whispered with a chuckle, setting the empty glass on the table. "We still need to know your character."
"I'll dress up as Doctor Strange."
David sentenced with his chin up. Spencer scowled at him.
"That one's not even from Marvel."
The older man arched an eyebrow and looked his friend up and down.
"I think I'm old enough to choose when I can break the rules."
Everyone smiled. He was absolutely right.
Derek gave Emily a weak kick on her left boot. She looked at him quizzically but he looked down at his son who was sleeping peacefully in his father's big arms. Obviously, he couldn't hit the roulette wheel. His hands were full.
"Well, an innocent hand will spin the roulette wheel for you."
Emily grabbed her Iphone with a chuckle. She could barely keep it up for more than two minutes.
"Let Hotch do it. No, no. Jennifer and Will."
She approached everyone but never let them stop roulette.
"The most innocent hand is mine. I'll do it."
She let out a laugh but hit the roulette button.
Immediately, her whole face turned into a gesture of surprise.
Emily put her hand to her mouth, still laughing, as she turned her cell phone over so everyone could read the result.
"Are you fucking kidding me?"
Emily was still laughing her head off, just before she plopped down on the garden lounger and closed her eyes.
Her friends didn't know how to react or what to say. David decided to break the tension.
"Batman is the best superhero ever."