Chapter 87, everybody! Love how I got to this episode and went oh this should be quick and it ended up being four chapters long. X'D

So in canon Jessie and Misty enter the contest because they both want the doll set, but…technically I don't have to follow canon so it's just Jessie wanting the dolls this time around.

Also I love how I intended to have a full battle between Misty and Jessie and then Porygon went so hey what if I were a literal unit—fortunately, we have shenanigans. And yes, Porygon is making those old dial-up sounds and glitter solves many problems.

In other news, aggressively gendering toys is asinine, let the kids play with the toys they want to play for as long as they want to play with them. This PSA has been brought to you by someone who insisted on having the boy toys at McDonalds because for some reason the boys got all the cool toys like cars and Pokémon dolls got fed to dinosaurs in my house. Also I've never worn makeup but Mom has gone over the basics with me so I can sort of fluff through an explanation.

And now for reviews: thanks to quadehays4, Black Knight Lucario, Dragonkeeper10, griffin blackwood, Silverwing23, LongNightDragon, thor94, Reader, Viruz pirate, forward-smash, and epantoja521 for the reviews! Glad we're all on the same page about pizza fixing everything. XD

Pokémon © Game Freak; Nintendo

And now, for something completely different:

Stay tuned for another exciting episode of The Shadow and the Nightmare, the story of one man's unending battle to ensure that crime does not pay. The stage opens on amateur criminologist and trainer Lamont Cranston, and his partner in crime-solving, the lovely Margo Lane. Tonight's story: "Murder in the Contest Hall."

Misty had figured it out about the same time Ash and Brock did, had questioned Jessie behind the scenes and gotten generally the same explanation about her new Pokémon (Misty could understand her being ticked at the Lickitung, could easily imagine Muk doing that instead).

Jessie's motivation for the contest was different, however.

"I've been wanting a doll set ever since I was a little girl," Jessie said. "And the prize they're offering is that exact doll set. I'm motivated."

Okay you know what, that was fair. And considering Misty's motivation was showing these idiots up, she wasn't about to hold that against her.

There was, however, the little issue of them being the only ones left standing a few rounds later.

"Sorry, sweetie, but I'm getting that doll set," Jessie said. "And I'm flattening anyone who gets in my way! Go, Porygon!"

"Go Squirtle!" Misty yelled, throwing Squirtle into the fray. The turtle did a flip, landed and flexed for the crowd, who went wild.

"I do not understand the logic of these contests," Misty muttered. "Okay, Porygon's tough so open with Iron Defense!"

"Just like we discussed!" Jessie ordered, gesturing dramatically.

Misty had no idea what that meant, but considering Porygon's body started sharpening and growing jagged edges as it flickered about meant that this was probably going to be bad. "Disrupt it with Bubble!"

The Porygon dodged most of the bubbles, a few scoring glancing hits but not doing much damage. It started glowing, colorful squares of light flitting around—

When Squirtle tried again the Porygon tanked the hit, the attack doing no more damage now than it had when it was only glancing blows. "What—"

"Conversion 2!" Jessie crowed. "It makes Porygon resistant to whatever move you throw at it! You know I'm really starting to like you," she told the Porygon.

"I told you!" James yelled from the crowd.

"Okay then fine, we just come up with something better," Misty said. "Uhh Withdraw and Iron Defense…." Aha. "And then Rapid Spin!"

Squirtle did a little bounce before doing as she said, making the spinning shell he retreated in hop as well when he came back down—"And Water Gun!" Misty added, feeling that she might have a counter to what Jessie was doing with Porygon.

Porygon, meanwhile, was glowing with several different effect moves before summoning up a ball of energy above its head to start firing—

"Porygon learns electric moves!?" Misty squawked.

"I know, surprised me too," Jessie said. "They picked up a lot of moves during this whole thing."

Well bully for Porygon, because right now Misty was panicking. Squirtle's combo of Rapid Spin and Water Gun was the only thing keeping him ahead of Porygon's blasts, and only by dint of the Porygon not being able to predict where he'd be in the next five seconds. Once it got in a hit, it'd be over. Come on, think! Conversion 2 made Porygon resistant to the move used on it, and it used it right after Bubble, so that made it resistant to Water moves. That meant the typing would more closely resemble something like Grass, Steel, or Dragon—

"Bounce close and use Ice Punch!" Misty ordered—if it was resistant to Water, chances were high it was now weak to Ice.

"Dodge that!" Jessie barked—Porygon started glowing again, flickering as Squirtle angled for it—

Dodged as Squirtle went sailing by, leaving a sparkling trail of ice as he went.

"And that's not good either," Misty said, taking note of how the Porygon's eyes glowed as it locked on to Squirtle. "Back to Rapid Spin! Don't let it touch you!"

"Don't let it get the best of you!" Jessie told the Porygon. "Figure out a way to pin that turtle down!"

Porygon continued to float high above the field, although the sound it was making made Misty think it was trying to connect to the internet. Squirtle bounced high again, risking a Hydro Pump aimed at it—

Porygon spun around and fired an electric attack down the water to Squirtle, stopping the Hydro Pump with a Protect as it did so. Squirtle just barely avoided getting electrocuted, went back to bouncing around it—

Juddered to a halt when Porygon fired off a Discharge.

"No!" Misty gasped. "Fine, no more running—Iron Defense and Skull Bash!"

"You don't need to assess every move," Jessie told the Porygon. "Hit it with another electric attack before it pops back out and hits you."

The Porygon made an affirmative noise, glowing with several shielding moves before firing off another Discharge. Squirtle was able to tank the hit due to all his defense-boosting moves, but Misty didn't hold out much hope of that being a recurring thing.

"Jink left! Skull Bash!" Misty ordered—maybe she'd be lucky and it'd do another Conversion 2, give her something to work with.

The way Squirtle glanced off of it told her this most likely wouldn't happen. Whatever type it had picked to resist Water also resisted Normal. Probably Steel, then. Or it had so many defense-boosting moves active as well that this was going to turn into a war of attrition.

"Okay," Misty said as Squirtle landed, putting her hands on her knees and shifting her weight a little; the action made her miss her usual outfit. "The problem is it knows Electric moves that are guaranteed to hit. Ice Punch would probably work, but we can't get close enough for you to actually hit it. Any ideas?"

Squirtle considered this…flashed her a thumbs-up.

"Then I suggest you do it," Misty said, eyeing the sparking Porygon.

Squirtle nodded—

Fired Hydro Pump straight down, launching himself into the air—spun when Porygon electrocuted the water, sending it flying away and reducing the damage, firing a Water Gun to help keep him in place—

Popped back out, fist glowing—punched down at the water—

Punched again when the water froze, sending ice chunks flying everywhere.

"Okay so that's cool," Misty said, ducking a couple of the chunks that went flying her way. A lot of them were about ice-cube-sized, but several were softball-sized or larger and directed at the Porygon, who couldn't dodge them all.

It was properly battered-looking when she saw it again. Cheer—

She and Squirtle both gaped when it started glowing—looked fresh as a daisy when the glow faded.

"Presenting Recover," Jessie said smugly. "Good luck knocking them out now."

"Great," Misty muttered, gritting her teeth as she took in Squirtle's condition; the Turtle Pokémon was exhausted, having already expended a lot of energy staying ahead of the Porygon's super-effective attacks. "Okay. Squirtle, return—Pikachu, get out there. Those electric attacks won't affect you as badly."

Pikachu cheered and ran out as Squirtle sagged, the crowd booing as the latter vanished in a beam of red light. Misty didn't rightly care about the crowd's reactions, although she did allow herself a moment to ponder the irony of a supposedly feminine-leaning crowd being so out for blood.

"Okay, Agility!" Misty ordered, noticing the Porygon locking on to Pikachu. "Don't let it hit you!"

The Porygon made that connecting to the internet noise again, more protective moves shining up its body as it flickered again—

Started firing the starry shapes of Swift as Pikachu tried to dodge. Pikachu lessened the blow with a strong Discharge, fired a Thunder Shock at the Porygon—

"Recover and Conversion 2!" Jessie ordered.

Great. And judging by the way the Porygon didn't react to the second Thunder Shock, it had shifted to something like Ground that nerfed Electric. Okay next plan—ah!

"Get close and use Iron Tail!" Misty told Pikachu.

"Don't let it get close."

What followed was Pikachu chasing the Porygon all over the place, never able to get close enough to actually score a hit. Pikachu chattered in frustration at one point, fired a Swift quickly followed by a pumped-up Thunder.

"Don't waste your energy, Pikachu," Misty said. "It can't keep evading you forever!"

Pikachu paced a little, stopped, crouched—started flickering as the Porygon warmed up what looked like a Psychic attack. Dodged that attack, fired Swift back at it.

This was going to be a long and painful battle, Misty could sense it. Pikachu couldn't close in, and since most of his other attacks wouldn't work he was stuck with Swift as his only real option. Both of them had their speed and evasion boosted to max, and unlike Pikachu the Porygon had Recover at its disposal on top of a bunch of damage-reducing moves. It would take forever to whittle the Porygon down, and even if they did it'd use Recover and put them back at square one. And from the sounds of the crowd, they wouldn't have the patience for such a long, drawn-out battle.

She was already sorting through her remaining Pokémon, trying to figure out who would actually work in this situation, when something big landed nearby, crushing several untended stands.

"Hey!" Misty barked. "What's going on!?"

"Prepare for trouble!"

"And make it double!"

"Hey, that's our line!" Jessie hollered, shaking her fist at the giant mech. "And that's our schtick! JAMES! MEOWTH!"

Misty wasn't sure what to make of said giant mech, even less sure of James suddenly next to Jessie with both of them posing.

"To protect the world from devastation," Jessie said.

"To unite all people within our nation!" James rejoined, both of them pitching their voices above the two on the mech.

"To denounce the evils of truth and love!"

"To extend our reach to the stars above!"

There went the dress, revealing the white Rocket uniform beneath. Somehow. "Jessie!"

James' showy outfit similarly went flying, although Misty had an easier time believing he had his uniform beneath it. "James!"

"Team Rocket blast off at the speed of the spotlight!"

"Surrender now or prepare for a fabulous fight!"

"Me-OWTH that's right!" Meowth cheered, landing on their shoulders to thunderous applause.

"I'm confused," Misty said.

"Pretty sure dese two were thespian kids growin' up," Meowth told her.

"I was," James confirmed.

"But enough of that!" Jessie yelled, jabbing a finger at the two on the mech. "How dare you interrupt my moment of triumph!?"

"I wouldn't go that far," Misty said, looking up at the mech. "Hey wait a minute! Those are the two that were running that phony daycare!"

"Oh, Bunch and Cassidy," James said.

"It's BUTCH!" Butch hollered down. "And back to why we're here."

"Oh no you don't!" Jessie hollered, steaming. "You are NOT ruining my good day I already had enough with that stupid Lickitung eating all my clothes and I am NOT tolerating you two interrupting me winning those dolls! Go! Ekans! Lickitung! Koffing! Growlithe!"

"Koffing! Use Poison Gas around the base of that mech!" James ordered. "Growlie, ignite it when he's done!"

"Ekans, Acid Spray on the base of the mech!" Jessie ordered. "Porygon, Lickitung, get ready to block any attacks!"

"Not today," Butch countered, throwing several Pokéballs out. "Primeape! Cloyster! Stop them!"

"Charmeleon, Tentacruel, you help too!" Cassidy said, throwing two more into the fray. "Raticate, get in there and start with Swift! Put them on the defensive!"

"Should we get involved?" Misty asked Pikachu. When he nodded: "All right. Squirtle, Staryu, get out there! Keep those attacks from hitting the crowd!"

The first explosion knocked them all off their feet, something that the opposing Pokémon—still leaping down and therefore less affected—took advantage of, getting in an opening volley before the Lickitung could recover and start bashing them back.

"Okay we're going to need more help," Misty said, grabbing at more Pokéballs. "Bulbasaur! Vulpix! Oddish! Go!" Threw the big handful of Pokéballs—

Yes, the Pokémon she had called came out. So did Muk, who she had pointedly not called out.

"Do you MIND!?" she demanded of the pile of sludge.

"Muhh!" it bellowed.

"Hold on hold on I got this," James said, running over—

Misty blinked as he dumped a gallon of glitter onto Muk. "Rub that in real quick to help with the distribution," he told Muk, who bellowed again before taking his advice.

"I thought you confiscated the glitter," Jessie said to Meowth.

"I tried," Meowth said. "I can only do so much."

"I give up," Misty muttered, shaking her head. "Bulbasaur, you help Squirtle and Staryu keep the crowd safe—the rest of you, knock those guys for a loop!"

Oddish barked something before running into the fray, shaking loose tons of different spores as he went. The Cloyster shot a jet of water at Vulpix and Pikachu—

Muk swarmed up in front of them, swelling as it took the attack in its open mouth—looked like it took a pile of sludge's equivalent of a deep breath before spraying it back at the Cloyster as something more closely resembling Acid.

"Oh wow," Misty noised, taking a nonplussed moment alongside Pikachu and Vuplix; the Cloyster had clamped shut when it saw the attack coming, but its shell was still pockmarked from the effect of the acidic spray. "Um, thank you?"

"MUHHH!" Muk bellowed, before surging after the Charmeleon—the opposing Pokémon took one look at the oncoming tide of glittery filth and fled.

"Get back in there!" Cassidy ordered, operating something in the mech—one of the robotic arms came up, probably with intent to slam down on one of the Pokémon turning the tables on them—

Onix bit down hard on the metal arm and held it in place, glaring at Butch and Cassidy as he did so.

"Oh no you don't," Brock announced. "Geodude! Get in there and help take that mech out!"

"Haunter, you too!" Ash ordered, throwing a Pokéball into the fray as well.

"You three are the ones we're after specifically," Cassidy growled. "And you!" she snapped at Jessie, James and Meowth. "If you call yourselves Rockets you'll start fighting them!"

"Can't, technically dat's a conflict o' interests and orders," Meowth said.

"I had this contest in the bag, this is personal," Jessie said sharply. "Everyone take that mech out!"

Butch and Cassidy's Pokémon didn't last long under a focused assault, and the mech didn't last much longer after that.

"Now," Jessie said, tossing her hair as the opposing Rocket team disappeared with a ping into the sky. "Where were we?"

"You seriously want to finish our battle after that," Misty said. "There's not even a field left!"

"It's the principle of it."

"Jessie," James said. "Not to get myself hurt but this feels like one of the things you should let go."

Jessie's response was cut off by the announcer, whom Misty had honestly forgotten about. "Wow! In a stunning turn of events, the last two contestants absolutely decimated that mech that was threatening our fair city! Our judges have convened, and seeing as how we have no more battlefield to play on, we've decided to declare this battle a tie! You girls will have to decide who gets what amongst yourselves," he added in an undertone.

Misty looked at the dolls, recalling how part of her longed for a set of her own whenever her sisters teased her about playing with hand-me-downs or claimed she was too boyish for dolls. Technically, if she got them she'd finally have her own, new set.

But another part of her, the part fueled by the memories sparked by her reflection in the mirror, told her she didn't really need them; she already knew she was better.

So she turned to Jessie. "You can have the dolls."

Okay, she expected Jessie to hug her and blubber thanks—Jessie had made it clear that she was in it for the prize. James, on the other hand, she didn't get, nor did she understand him also gushing over the dolls and suggesting outfits they could make.

"I have questions," she said to Meowth.

"Sometin' sometin' let da kids play wid dere toys," Meowth said, shrugging.

"Aggressively gendering toys and then insisting that people abandon said toys at an arbitrary age is banal and actually negatively impacts growth," Brock offered.

"What he said."

"What did you say?" Ash asked Brock.

"In sum: nine times out of ten I was too tired to tell my sibs off if I wanted to, and at the end of the day my sisters playing with Tonka trucks and my brothers playing with dolls did not, in fact, mark the end of the world," Brock said.

Misty decided that it was easier to just go with it.

"So can we talk about the fact that Team Rocket crashed the contest? Like, not the real Team Rocket, those weirdo knockoffs."

"I'm pretty sure those guys were Team Rocket, and Jessie and James had some preexisting beef with them," Brock said, shouldering the door open for them.

"So earlier I ran into Jessie and James in one of the department stores, and they seemed perfectly fine with us beating up Butch and Cassidy," Misty said. "I'm going to say Team Rocket has some dissention in the ranks."

"Yes well, would one of you all like to explain to me what happened?" Darkrai demanded, leaning out of a shadow in the hotel room.

"The guys that ran the phony daycare crashed the contest and Team Rocket helped us blow them away," Ash said, gesturing. "I'm not sure if it makes any more sense if you saw it. Also Misty gave the dolls to Jessie."

Darkrai looked at Misty. "What was the point of the contest if you didn't take the prize money?"

"I had a point to prove," Misty said stiffly. "And now that it's proven, I need to take all this off and get back to looking like regular Misty Waterflower. Where's my stuff?"

"Right here," Brock said, handing her her backpack. "Also this is for you, it's makeup remover, wipe, do not rub."

"So all those siblings just cover all the bases, don't they?"

"Pretty much."

"I'm still left wondering what the point of this excursion was," Darkrai said, arms crossed as he floated fully out of the shadow to glower at Misty.

"Pika," Pikachu noised, sounding agreeing.

"Grinding opponents into the dirt," Misty said. "Which I now need to wash off."

Darkrai considered this. "You know what? I accept this explanation."

"Glad you approve."

"Now I know who you reminded me of," Ash said, snapping his fingers suddenly. "Margo Lane, off of The Shadow and the Nightmare—you kind of looked like the pictures of her."

"That's flattering, I suppose," Misty said, heading for the bathroom. "Never got into that show, so…."

"Gasp—sac—um—how do you say it?" he asked Darkrai.

"Sacrilege," Darkrai told him.

"It's a compliment," Brock told her as she shut the bathroom door. "You need any help in there? I've got a lot of practice with my sisters as far as getting makeup off."

"I figured you did. No, I'm fine, I just need a minute."

"All right," Brock said, heading over to the bed and sitting down next to Ash.

"So I'm with Darkrai on this, I'm not sure what the point of this was," Ash said. "It's not like it was even a break from battling."

"We can argue unwinding?" Brock offered.

"She seemed pretty wound up earlier," Darkrai countered, floating over a couch piled with earlier purchases.

"Yeah well it all kind of went sideways somewhere towards the middle."

"The story of your lives, we'll put that on your tombstones."

"And I wish I could argue with that."

Misty, meanwhile, needed a few more minutes before taking that makeup off. Not that she'd ever explain it to anyone, but…it was nice, seeing her again, even if it was just an echo of her.

She smiled at the mirror, trying her best to imitate how her mother had smiled, always with that little extra crinkle around her eyes that made it so warm.

"It was good to see you again, Mom," she said softly, before taking a deep breath and tugging the makeup remover over. Maybe someday, when she wasn't constantly roughing it or trying to speed through getting ready for some contest, she'd wear makeup like her mom used to.

It'd be worth it, she decided, to see her again.