RAIN ON THE DESERT
By Yûmei
Disclaimer:
Xenogears belongs to SQUARESOFT….(sigh) you should know it now…
Author's
apology: sorry… me no speak the English well… me bought a BIG dictionary though…
Me very open to criticism and corrections… Me just poor little froggie… sorry…
This fic is
dedicated to Shadow Angel, who was the first person to review one of my
stories. Thanks a lot Angie, hope you like this one ^_^.
BTW, I
wrote this story during my lunch hour at work, so it might not be as good as I
hope it would…(heavy sigh… it's always like that…)
She was
leaning against a column of the Fatima Castle, looking outside absently.
On the
desert, it was raining…
It was such
a strange and beautiful sight… she couldn't take her eyes off of it.
It seemed
to her that the weather was the image of her heart.
Sad… an
overwhelming sadness.
He was
looking at her from behind, motionless and silent. He felt so guilty…
He had hurt
her… he knew it. He could be so stupid, sometimes…
Sigurd
always complained about his childish behavior… Maybe he wasn't –always- wrong.
And the
rain on the desert… Perhaps it was a sign…
He didn't
know.
But what he
knew was that he had to apologize. And to be strong enough to…
"Beautiful,
no?"
She turned
her head to see Bart approaching her with an hesitant smile.
"There is a
legend about rain and desert, have you ever heard it?"
He just
stood there, next to her, his arms crossed and looking outside, like she had
been since he arrived. She didn't answer his question.
"They say
the Cloud fell in love with the Dune… He was always watching her from above,
and they were very happy this way. But the Wind found out about their love and
became jealous… He blew so hard the Cloud moved far away from his lover, and
then he created a tempest to scatter the Dune. They never saw each other again…
So when it rains on the desert, it means that the Cloud is back to the place he
met his love and cries her loss until he disappears again."
Margie just
shook her head. "Sad story", she said coldly.
"They also
say the tears of the cloud have a magical power: they can bring people back
together…" With a charming smile, he took her hand and brought it to his lips.
She shrugged
and withdrew her hand. "This is not part of the legend, is it? You just made it
up."
"Errr…
okay, I admit it… I was just looking for…"
"…An easy
was to apologize?"
"Y… yes…
Margie, please forgive me…"
She sighed
deeply. "It's not that easy, Bart. I don't wanna be treated like this anymore.
You have to make a decision: if you want me to be by your side, just say it and
stop acting as if you didn't care about me at all. If you want me to leave you
alone, tell me directly: I'll go back to Nisan, and never disturb you again.
But don't play with me, I can't stand it… Our wedding is planned, Bart! We are
not only cousins now, we are fiancés… Your indifference is too hard to bear…"
She looked
at him so sadly… He saw tears in her eyes. But he was so… unable to give her
what she wanted… he didn't know himself.
"Margie…
you know I care about you… If I didn't, would I have saved you from Shakhan?
Would I run to you everytime you're in danger… everytime you're depressed,
would I cheer you up like I do? Would I think of you all the time? Would I
protect your life more than my own?… But… I… just can't decide right now. I
don't know if what I feel for you is a brotherly love, or more… I can't decide
anything before I'm sure of myself."
She closed
her eyes, hoping to prevent her tears from falling… but she failed.
"I told you
how I feel, Bart. I think you had enough time… I've always loved you… and it
hurts so much to see you are so unsure of a thing that is so clear for me… I
think I will leave to Nisan: being with an indifferent you all the time hurts
more than being away from you, and never be able to see the man I love…"
He reached
out to touch her cheek. "Margie… I never intended to make you cry…"
"That's the
problem: you never want to harm people, but you do it anyway. The only solution
is… to stop the wedding's preparations. I think it better this way." Then,
suddenly, she burst into tears.
"Oh… God,
Margie, please don't cry… I can't stand to see you cry…" he made a step and embraced her. She
struggled a bit, but she felt so weak and exhausted… She couldn't play this
game any longer. She stopped fighting and held him back, needing so much the
strength and comfort he always gave her…
'I love him so… why can't he love me?'
He felt her
body shaking with sobs. So fragile and soft… This strange need to protect her…
"Margie, don't cry…" He slowly fondled her hair.
'It's my fault… I don't want to, but I
always make her suffer. She doesn't deserve it… She is too good for me.'
She felt so
stupid, crying in his arms like this… She wanted him to love her… so much… she
always had… she couldn't remember a past where she didn't love him. This was…
so… unfair…
Bart
quivered when he felt her holding him tighter. She lifted her head, her eyes
still closed, and blindly kissed his skin. Dumbfounded, he found himself bending his head to answer the kisses. Their
lips brushed.
She opened
her eyes in surprise, and what she saw made her blush: his face was so near,
his eyes closed, and bangs of blond hair were falling on his cheek, caressing
her.
She didn't
understand, but she didn't want to destroy the magic of this moment…
Bart felt
her relax against him, tasting her tears at the same time he tasted her lips.
The sensation was incredible… wanting it to last longer, he deepened the
kiss.... This one was so different from the others he had given before… Margie
was kissing him with all her heart, love and hope…
Then, he
knew.
Even if
this was not this kind of love, the passion that burns everything around it, he
did love her. He knew how empty life would be without her.
And, wasn't
it enough?
"Margie…"
he murmured against her lips. "Don't leave me… I'll marry you…"
"Please,
tell me you don't just say this because of my tears…"
He looked at
her and answered honestly: "No."
Love could
come later, they already had so much… She was too precious, as was her love.
He knew
he'd never want another woman to spend his life with.
But… wasn't
that what they call 'real love', after all?
He realized
it suddenly. This feeling… hiding deep inside…
"There are different kinds of love. Don't
let yourself be mistaken."
His mother
said that. She must have been right.
Friendship
could be the base of love.
And even if
it wasn't…
He wanted
her to stay.
On the
desert, rain had stopped…
But no one
cared…
-FIN-
Author's
(short) note: Sorry it was so mushy… I just felt stupidly romantic the day I
wrote this one. Next will be better, I promise!
BTW I also
apologize if there are some HTML problems… I'm not very good at this…
