Chapter
13
Mitsuru waited impatiently by the entrance of Komagome Hospital. It was a toss-up who would get to him first: Shinobu or Ryan. And he didn't know how he would react to either one. He was a roiling mass of confusion and concern with a little bit of fear and apprehension thrown in.
Shinobu had sounded curt over the phone, but Mitsuru was unsure whether the brusqueness had been due to Mitsuru's interrupting his mission or the information he said he'd uncovered. The blonde hoped it was the latter. He did not want to be on his best friend's bad side right now. He'd had plenty of time to mull over his theory about Shinobu's feelings for him and he knew they had to talk about it. Soon. He needed Shinobu calm and amenable when he finally confronted him.
Then
there was Ryan. Shinobu had commanded his
friend not to engage the target, but Ryan's entering the hospital - after all
that senseless meandering beforehand - drove Mitsuru mad with curiosity and he
had been half-tempted to disobey orders and poke his nose where it didn't
belong. In fact, he'd made a couple of
half-hearted attempts to investigate but it seemed fate – or Shinobu's damnable
luck – had conspired against him. The
two times he'd tried to approach the receptionist, he'd been shoved aside in favor
of more pressing emergencies.
Damn
that boy and his broken leg anyway! I
didn't see any bone breaking through skin; it wasn't that bad! And that girl with the bleeding forehead. For crying out loud! Just swab it up and throw a bandage on
it! Head wounds always look worse than
they really are! Mitsuru grumbled unfeelingly.
So
Shinobu had won again. And the boy
wasn't even in the near vicinity.
How
does he do that? Mitsuru wondered
irritably. The gods must love him
lots, for him to always get what he wants.
Mitsuru
exited the hospital with ill grace and continued his surveillance with growing
irritation. The blonde checked his
watch for the twentieth time in as many minutes. Everything was moving with agonizing slowness. If something didn't happen soon, Mitsuru
swore he would go insane. Patience was
not one of his virtues. He was so
itching for action that he didn't even think to distract himself by playing his
imaginary games. Somehow, the tone
Shinobu's voice had conveyed over the phone and the discovery of Ryan's final
destination warranted less frivolity and more solemnity.
The
hospital doors swung open and Mitsuru looked up idly, not really expecting
much, the way things had been going for him recently. But it was Ryan. And
Mitsuru knew his premonitions of doom had not been unfounded. Because this was a Ryan he had not yet
encountered. He had observed the boy in his many phases: snarky, aloof,
sarcastic, even playful. But Mitsuru
had never seen the boy look so pale. Or
so afraid.
The
blonde was so taken aback by the stark fear in Ryan's face that his resolve to
confront the boy faded with a whimper. It was with extreme diffidence that he drew himself up from the wall
he'd been leaning against and made his presence known. He instantly regretted his action. The expression on Ryan's face upon seeing
him was not encouraging.
"What
the hell are you doing here? Are you
following me? Who'd you talk to? What do you know?"
Ryan
was acting like a wounded cub, lashing out with blind fierceness at what he
construed as a threat. More than ever,
Mitsuru wished he'd followed Shinobu's advice about not engaging the
target. But it was too late for
recriminations, and the blonde tried to salvage the situation with his innate
tact and aplomb.
"Ryan! Hey, calm down, ne? I was just passing by on my way to…"
The
glare Ryan directed at him stopped him in mid-sentence. This was not working. On to Plan B. Did he have a Plan B?
"So,
what brings you here?"
Oh,
good Plan B.
Ryan
scowled even more darkly and Mitsuru looked away, frantically wishing for
Shinobu to hurry up and get there. The
awkwardness between the two boys was bordering on hostile tension, and for
once, Mitsuru was at a loss. In the
midst of the normal frenetic hospital activity, a silence settled over the two
boys. The blonde shifted uneasily on
his feet, clutching his book bag and wanting nothing more than to rewind back
to a few seconds ago so he could have chosen option number two: stay hidden.
Mitsuru
was about to attempt another inane conversational gambit when an orderly rushed
out of the hospital, calling to Ryan loudly. "Mr. Sakata! You forgot your medication!"
Ryan
turned to the man and snatched the proffered bag from his grasp. Then, with a curt nod at the slightly
put-out nurse, he stalked off, leaving Mitsuru behind, gaping at his
boorishness. The blonde looked to the
orderly to apologize for his friend's behavior, his courteousness taking
over. This, he could do. It was a relief, really, to be able to do
something right. Ryan's anger had momentarily
stymied him, and Mitsuru hated feeling ineffectual.
It
was the look on the orderly's face, more than anything, that galvanized the
blonde into action. The man had gotten
over his initial outrage at Ryan's abruptness, and his face was now transformed
into a mask of compassion and sorrow. Whatever it was that had brought Ryan to the hospital, it was serious
enough to have warranted sympathy from even this subordinate. Mitsuru murmured a hasty "gomen" and rushed
after the other boy.
"What
was that all about? You didn't have to
be so rude!"
"And
who are you to tell me what I should or shouldn't do?" At least Ryan was
talking to him, although the boy didn't slow his stride.
"I
thought I was your friend."
"Maybe
you should stop thinking, then."
"Now
hold on a minute…" Mitsuru grabbed the other boy's arm and yanked him roughly
to a halt. There was just so much
insolence he could take before his own hot-headedness came to the fore. "I don't know what's going on here, but I
think the least you owe me is some courtesy and an explanation."
"Why?"
Ryan looked pointedly at the hand that still held him but Mitsuru was not
swayed by his iciness. He maintained
his grip.
"Look,
we haven't heard from you in almost a week…"
"We?"
Ryan arched his eyebrow.
"Yes,
`we'! Shinobu and me. And for almost a week…"
"The
phone works both ways you know."
"Yes,
but…"
"And
from Tezuka's reaction that night on the train, I really didn't think you'd
want me to call. I figured I'd give him
some time to cool off. What do you
think he would've said if I'd called you the morning after?"
"Well,
that's true, but…"
"So
I waited for you to get a hold of me. And when you didn't, I just assumed Tezuka got to you and I was back to
being persona non grata, and since I figured you guys had issues to work
out…well, I'm not a home wrecker, you know."
"A
home --- now, wait a minute…"
"And
now you're following me, maybe even spying on me. Did you even stop to think that this was my private business and
I didn't want you to know? Then you
accuse me of being rude, demand explanations where none is needed. I don't know how things work in Japan,
Ikeda, but back where I come from, you're the one that's fucked up
here."
Somehow,
Ryan had managed to turn the tables, making Mitsuru feel remorseful and in
desperate need to blurt out explanations. The blonde could not get in a word edgewise, however, and the longer he
was held in check, the more he felt his guilt growing. It was done so smoothly and so
insidiously. Even Shinobu would have
been impressed.
"Now
let go of my arm and leave me the hell alone," Ryan withdrew the appendage in
question from Mitsuru's unresisting grasp and turned to walk away.
"It's
gotten worse, hasn't it?" The question
was soft, neutral. Mitsuru looked up
from his paralysis to see Shinobu standing directly in front of Ryan's path,
effectively blocking any retreat the other boy could have been contemplating.
The
afternoon sun played impartial witness to the drama that was unfolding. All three participants were at a standstill,
jostled every once in a while by rush hour pedestrians. Cars whizzed past, creating sporadic bursts
of breeze that caught at hair and ruffled brown, blond and silver. Mitsuru stared at his roommate, marveling at
the boy's sudden yet timely appearance. Ryan hugged his bag of medication
protectively to his chest, a faraway look in his eyes. Shinobu had his arms loosely at his sides,
his stance easy and non-threatening.
"Ryan."
Mitsuru
started at the gentleness in his best friend's voice. Ryan registered it as well and his glazed expression refocused
slowly. The boy met Shinobu's eyes
half-belligerently, unable to accept the apparent solicitude coming from his
former enemy. The two locked gazes and
Ryan felt disbelief warring with hope in his heart as he saw the raw sincerity
in Shinobu's grey depths. The day had
been long; the visit, traumatic; the subsequent news, gut-wrenching. He was exhausted. He didn't want to fight anymore. He was sick of fighting. Hope
won out.
Ryan
held out his hand and Shinobu took hold.
"Let's
get out of here?"
"Hai."