DISCLAIMER: I'll let you guess. Oh alright, they don't belong to us.
THIS IS A COLLABORATION FIC BY :o) AND VIPER! SO IF IT'S ODD...WELL, IT'S ODD! Merci Beaucoup to our friend Brooke, who, in a way, inspired this fic- though she doesn't know it yet, heehee. The Ugly Stick belongs to her, I guess.
PART 1- WRITTEN BY :o)
When little Scott Summers was born, he looked like a normal baby. Ten fingers, eleven toes, outtie bellybutton, fauceps marks on the side of his head. You know, the usual. His parents, Katherine and Christopher loved their "liddle Scotty Wotty" dearly, and would do all the usual things that devoted parents did- for example, dropping him on his head, feeding him talcom powder, leaving him in his diapers for days to conserve. You know, the usual.
Little did they know that he had been targeted by the ugly stick.
Yes, the ugly stick. That formidable foe. Sure, it looked like a normal stick, rather bent and knobbly, with a few sharp twigs growing out of the sides- but this stick was evil. And it came into the world like this.
A long time ago, in a forest far, far away, grew a black, evil tree. It was ugly, and twisted, and was actually the resting place of the Headless Horseman, though that has no relevance on the story, and shall not be mentioned again. Now, one day, the ugly tree was struck by lightning. A stick broke off, and somehow achieved sentience, while the rest of the tree burned. The ugly stick, woken after years of just 'hanging around', decided to make the world as ugly as it was, and went on an ugliness rampage.
So, one day, when it saw Liddle Scotty Wotty in his stroller in the park, all alone, drooling in that disgustingly adorable baby way, it decided that this kid had to go. It was about to attack, just as Katherine returned from the mother she had been talking too.
"Are you ready to go home now Scotty Wotty?" She cooed. "I think you are. Oh yes you are. Lets go home now." She rolled the stroller out of the park, managing to run over the ugly stick as she did it.
The ugly stick, naturally, was furious at being thwarted. It was more determined than ever to make an ugly baby out of Scotty Wotty. So, it did the only thing it could do under the circumstances.
Stalking.
Wherever Liddle Scotty Wotty went, the ugly stick went too. Every time he won a baby pagent, the ugly stick was there to boo. Everytime Scotty Wotty ate, the ugly stick was off to the side in the long grass, binoculars up to his little twiggy eyes. It was waiting got the right moment. And one day, it came.
Katherine was out at a meeting. Christopher was at home, looking after now 2 year old Scotty Wotty, and his new baby brother, Alex. Christopher was putting Alex to bed, and Scotty Wotty was in the lounge room, playing with his blocks.
The ugly stick crept out from behind it's pot plant, and crept over to Scotty Wotty. Scotty stared at it, brown eyes wide an unsuspecting. A wisp of fine brown hair stuck up in all directions.
"Hi." He said in a kiddy voice, and jammed his fingers in his mouth. A trickle of drool crept down his chin, and splashed onto his Sesame Street shirt, in that disgustingly adorable baby way.
The ugly stick grinned evilly, in an evil twiggy way. This was going to be fun. So, it attacked.
THWACK!
THWACK!
THWACK!
Scotty Wotty began to scream loudly, and the ugly stick heard footsteps in the hall.
"Curses! Foiled again!" it yelled, and quickly left the house, leaving his job half done. "I'll be back one day, to finish the job! You can count on it!" the ugly stick vowed.
Christopher ran into the room, and stared at his two year old son.
"Oh Dear Lord!" He cried out at the sight of the wailing toddler. For Scotty Wotty had been hit about the eyes by the ugly stick. And in a band surrounding his eyes, like a bad mask was pure, unrequited ugliness. Words can not describe how hideous he looked now.
Christopher promptly fainted, and when Katherine came home later on, she found him lying on a heap on the floor, while Scotty Wotty drew on him with a Magic Marker.
"Oh, Dear Lord!" She screamed when she saw her child.
From that day onwards, Liddle Scotty Wotty became Scott Summers.
*********************************ALASKA**************************************
"Christopher, they're firing again!" Katherine cried out, terror in her voice. "And they've missed again!"
"Damn those Shi'ar!" Christopher Summers yelled. "Can't even get one bloody assassination job right!"
"Well, maybe if you stopped DODGING they could hit us!" Katherine screamed.
The Summers family had "gone on vacation" in Alaska. (In reality, they had gone there to hide Scott from the rest of the world.) While there, Katherine, Christopher and Alex ran into a few aliens on a scouting mission. After witnessing Scott's ugliness first hand, all had decided they didn't want to live anymore, and hired the Shi'ar to blow up there plane, and their defective son.
"It's just not fair. It's like some higher being doesn't want him killed!" Katherine sobbed, collapsing into the co-pilots seat.
Christopher thought for a moment. "I have an idea. Though we will probably survive, and spend the rest of our lives being driven crazy at the memory, we can still spare Alex the misery, and kill the monster at the same time. Katherine, strap them both into our one conveniently remaining parachute, and throw them out, lighting the parachute as you do!"
Katherine's jaw dropped. "Are you sure we can go on with the horror?"
Christopher squeezed her arm reassuringly. "Maybe, someday, somehow, we'll forget. Ditch 'em."
Tears of anguish running down her face at the prospect of remaining alive, she strapped her two sons into the one conveniently remaining parachute. "Goodbye Alex." She sobbed, kissing him on the forehead, and he hugged her.
"What about me?" Scott asked hopefully, leaning up for a kiss, and Katherine shrunk away, a repulsed look on her face.
"Umm, some other time." She said hastily. "Bye!" Then, she shoved both Alex and the Abomination out of the plane, hastily lightly the parachute with a match which she quickly struck. The two boys plummeted to the ground, flaming parachute floating above them majestically, and Katherine went back to the cockpit.
"Maybe we'll die on impact!" Christopher said cheerfully. "Don't give up hope yet!"
Suddenly, the Shi'ar beamed them out, as the plane nosedived into the dirt.
About a kilometer away, the two brothers were falling to the ground, as there weakened parachute finally burnt into cinders. While Scott screamed, Alex laughed delightedly, and when they impacted with the ground, he fell into blissful unconsciousness. Scott also hit the ground, but managed to smash his head on a rock at the same time before also falling asleep. As a result, both were out cold when the police, alerted by the public in a nearby town to the flaming shape falling from the sky arrived.
"Oh dear Lord, what is it!" One cop, Bill, said to his partner, as he kicked the hideous Summers. "It's some sort of monster!"
His partner, Phil, came up behind him, and took a look. "Oh geez!" He yelled, looking away. "What the hell? That is safely the most hideous thing I've ever seen!"
Bill walked over to the other shape lying on the ground. He rolled Alex over, and saw that he was smiling. "This ones normal. We should take them to the hospital."
"Are you sure about that one?" Phil asked, kicking the prone Scott. "I don't know if the doctor's would treat him, considering that big band of ugliness over his eyes."
After a big discussion, the two cops finally decided to take them both into town. They dragged them to the patrol car, and threw the two brothers in, then started up the car. They were nearly to the hospital, when Alex woke up. Immediately seeing his unconscious brother beside him, he began to scream, and the cops, alarmed, pulled over the car.
"What is it?" Phil asked him.
"My...bro..broth...brother!" Alex stammered. "He's supposed to be dead! So am I! Oh please, don't let me live!" With a cry of anguish, Alex opened the car door, and ran off into the woods. Bill started to get out to chase after him, but Phil held him back.
"Let 'im go." Phil said solemly. "He knows what he's doing."
So, Alex disappeared into the woods, and the two cops drove the hideous Scott Summers to the hospital. Dumping him in the lobby, they both ran out, and went home.
For five hours, Scott lay crumpled on the floor of the lobby, while everyone tried to avoid him. One look at his hideous face had inspired them to stay right away. Finally, craftily using ten foot poles, the doctors managed to move him to a hospital room, and dumped him on a bed. When Scott woke up a few weeks later, he had no idea where he was, and had no recollection of his former life. The hospital dumped the ugly child in an orphanage, and he grew up there.
That's where the ugly stick tracked him to, and it began to once again stalk Scott, waiting for the right moment to finish off it's job of making him completely ugly.
*****************************************************************************
Becca, now it's your turn. Good luck. And be kind to the poor readers :)
THIS IS A COLLABORATION FIC BY :o) AND VIPER! SO IF IT'S ODD...WELL, IT'S ODD! Merci Beaucoup to our friend Brooke, who, in a way, inspired this fic- though she doesn't know it yet, heehee. The Ugly Stick belongs to her, I guess.
PART 1- WRITTEN BY :o)
When little Scott Summers was born, he looked like a normal baby. Ten fingers, eleven toes, outtie bellybutton, fauceps marks on the side of his head. You know, the usual. His parents, Katherine and Christopher loved their "liddle Scotty Wotty" dearly, and would do all the usual things that devoted parents did- for example, dropping him on his head, feeding him talcom powder, leaving him in his diapers for days to conserve. You know, the usual.
Little did they know that he had been targeted by the ugly stick.
Yes, the ugly stick. That formidable foe. Sure, it looked like a normal stick, rather bent and knobbly, with a few sharp twigs growing out of the sides- but this stick was evil. And it came into the world like this.
A long time ago, in a forest far, far away, grew a black, evil tree. It was ugly, and twisted, and was actually the resting place of the Headless Horseman, though that has no relevance on the story, and shall not be mentioned again. Now, one day, the ugly tree was struck by lightning. A stick broke off, and somehow achieved sentience, while the rest of the tree burned. The ugly stick, woken after years of just 'hanging around', decided to make the world as ugly as it was, and went on an ugliness rampage.
So, one day, when it saw Liddle Scotty Wotty in his stroller in the park, all alone, drooling in that disgustingly adorable baby way, it decided that this kid had to go. It was about to attack, just as Katherine returned from the mother she had been talking too.
"Are you ready to go home now Scotty Wotty?" She cooed. "I think you are. Oh yes you are. Lets go home now." She rolled the stroller out of the park, managing to run over the ugly stick as she did it.
The ugly stick, naturally, was furious at being thwarted. It was more determined than ever to make an ugly baby out of Scotty Wotty. So, it did the only thing it could do under the circumstances.
Stalking.
Wherever Liddle Scotty Wotty went, the ugly stick went too. Every time he won a baby pagent, the ugly stick was there to boo. Everytime Scotty Wotty ate, the ugly stick was off to the side in the long grass, binoculars up to his little twiggy eyes. It was waiting got the right moment. And one day, it came.
Katherine was out at a meeting. Christopher was at home, looking after now 2 year old Scotty Wotty, and his new baby brother, Alex. Christopher was putting Alex to bed, and Scotty Wotty was in the lounge room, playing with his blocks.
The ugly stick crept out from behind it's pot plant, and crept over to Scotty Wotty. Scotty stared at it, brown eyes wide an unsuspecting. A wisp of fine brown hair stuck up in all directions.
"Hi." He said in a kiddy voice, and jammed his fingers in his mouth. A trickle of drool crept down his chin, and splashed onto his Sesame Street shirt, in that disgustingly adorable baby way.
The ugly stick grinned evilly, in an evil twiggy way. This was going to be fun. So, it attacked.
THWACK!
THWACK!
THWACK!
Scotty Wotty began to scream loudly, and the ugly stick heard footsteps in the hall.
"Curses! Foiled again!" it yelled, and quickly left the house, leaving his job half done. "I'll be back one day, to finish the job! You can count on it!" the ugly stick vowed.
Christopher ran into the room, and stared at his two year old son.
"Oh Dear Lord!" He cried out at the sight of the wailing toddler. For Scotty Wotty had been hit about the eyes by the ugly stick. And in a band surrounding his eyes, like a bad mask was pure, unrequited ugliness. Words can not describe how hideous he looked now.
Christopher promptly fainted, and when Katherine came home later on, she found him lying on a heap on the floor, while Scotty Wotty drew on him with a Magic Marker.
"Oh, Dear Lord!" She screamed when she saw her child.
From that day onwards, Liddle Scotty Wotty became Scott Summers.
*********************************ALASKA**************************************
"Christopher, they're firing again!" Katherine cried out, terror in her voice. "And they've missed again!"
"Damn those Shi'ar!" Christopher Summers yelled. "Can't even get one bloody assassination job right!"
"Well, maybe if you stopped DODGING they could hit us!" Katherine screamed.
The Summers family had "gone on vacation" in Alaska. (In reality, they had gone there to hide Scott from the rest of the world.) While there, Katherine, Christopher and Alex ran into a few aliens on a scouting mission. After witnessing Scott's ugliness first hand, all had decided they didn't want to live anymore, and hired the Shi'ar to blow up there plane, and their defective son.
"It's just not fair. It's like some higher being doesn't want him killed!" Katherine sobbed, collapsing into the co-pilots seat.
Christopher thought for a moment. "I have an idea. Though we will probably survive, and spend the rest of our lives being driven crazy at the memory, we can still spare Alex the misery, and kill the monster at the same time. Katherine, strap them both into our one conveniently remaining parachute, and throw them out, lighting the parachute as you do!"
Katherine's jaw dropped. "Are you sure we can go on with the horror?"
Christopher squeezed her arm reassuringly. "Maybe, someday, somehow, we'll forget. Ditch 'em."
Tears of anguish running down her face at the prospect of remaining alive, she strapped her two sons into the one conveniently remaining parachute. "Goodbye Alex." She sobbed, kissing him on the forehead, and he hugged her.
"What about me?" Scott asked hopefully, leaning up for a kiss, and Katherine shrunk away, a repulsed look on her face.
"Umm, some other time." She said hastily. "Bye!" Then, she shoved both Alex and the Abomination out of the plane, hastily lightly the parachute with a match which she quickly struck. The two boys plummeted to the ground, flaming parachute floating above them majestically, and Katherine went back to the cockpit.
"Maybe we'll die on impact!" Christopher said cheerfully. "Don't give up hope yet!"
Suddenly, the Shi'ar beamed them out, as the plane nosedived into the dirt.
About a kilometer away, the two brothers were falling to the ground, as there weakened parachute finally burnt into cinders. While Scott screamed, Alex laughed delightedly, and when they impacted with the ground, he fell into blissful unconsciousness. Scott also hit the ground, but managed to smash his head on a rock at the same time before also falling asleep. As a result, both were out cold when the police, alerted by the public in a nearby town to the flaming shape falling from the sky arrived.
"Oh dear Lord, what is it!" One cop, Bill, said to his partner, as he kicked the hideous Summers. "It's some sort of monster!"
His partner, Phil, came up behind him, and took a look. "Oh geez!" He yelled, looking away. "What the hell? That is safely the most hideous thing I've ever seen!"
Bill walked over to the other shape lying on the ground. He rolled Alex over, and saw that he was smiling. "This ones normal. We should take them to the hospital."
"Are you sure about that one?" Phil asked, kicking the prone Scott. "I don't know if the doctor's would treat him, considering that big band of ugliness over his eyes."
After a big discussion, the two cops finally decided to take them both into town. They dragged them to the patrol car, and threw the two brothers in, then started up the car. They were nearly to the hospital, when Alex woke up. Immediately seeing his unconscious brother beside him, he began to scream, and the cops, alarmed, pulled over the car.
"What is it?" Phil asked him.
"My...bro..broth...brother!" Alex stammered. "He's supposed to be dead! So am I! Oh please, don't let me live!" With a cry of anguish, Alex opened the car door, and ran off into the woods. Bill started to get out to chase after him, but Phil held him back.
"Let 'im go." Phil said solemly. "He knows what he's doing."
So, Alex disappeared into the woods, and the two cops drove the hideous Scott Summers to the hospital. Dumping him in the lobby, they both ran out, and went home.
For five hours, Scott lay crumpled on the floor of the lobby, while everyone tried to avoid him. One look at his hideous face had inspired them to stay right away. Finally, craftily using ten foot poles, the doctors managed to move him to a hospital room, and dumped him on a bed. When Scott woke up a few weeks later, he had no idea where he was, and had no recollection of his former life. The hospital dumped the ugly child in an orphanage, and he grew up there.
That's where the ugly stick tracked him to, and it began to once again stalk Scott, waiting for the right moment to finish off it's job of making him completely ugly.
*****************************************************************************
Becca, now it's your turn. Good luck. And be kind to the poor readers :)