Disclaimer: Anything you recognize belongs to JK Rowling, the plot (yes, there IS a plot) and all of the un-recognizably JK Rowling-owned characters are mine too.
Chapter 4
"So here you are at last,
in the good ol' Hoggy Wart,
waiting, waiting, waiting,
for someone to start to sort.
"Well this must be your lucky day,
for I am just the one,
to put you in a House where it's sure,
you'll have lots of fun!
"Hufflepuff could be your match,
if you are funny and kind,
or maybe you belong in Ravenclaw,
if you have a bright mind.
"Slytherin is the place for you,
If you are clever and like to trick,
But if you're brave and honorable,
Gryffindor would be your pick.
"So when I call your name out,
Come up here to where I'm at,
Put me on and I'll put assign you a house,
For I'm a Sorting Hat!!!!
Everyone in the Great Hall clapped enthusiastically as the Sorting Hat finished his song, but were immediately hushed as the magnified voice of the Hat called out the first person.
"ALGAE, BERTHA!!!!!!"
Bertha Algae stood up with a smirk, waddled over to the sorting hat, and jammed it over her head (she was somewhat of a large girl and even the Sorting Hat had trouble fitting over her head).
Two seconds had not even passed when the hat shouted out, "SLYTHERIN!!!!"
Bertha did not look the least bit surprised as she yanked the hat off and waddled over to the Slytherin table.
"BLACK, SIRIUS!" screamed the hat as soon as Bertha managed to squeeze out of it.
Sirius jumped up from his seat and went over to the Sorting Hat and put it on.
"AHHHHHHHH!!!! I'M DROWNING!!!!!!!!!" he screamed as the massive
hat enveloped nearly all of his head. The entire Great Hall burst out laughing. A minute or two later, the hat pronounced him, "GRYFFINDOR!"
Sirius, looking rather harrassed, took the hat off and dropped it back on the chair with a look of discust. Then, with a good-humored laugh, he marched right over to the Gryffindor table and sat down. Everyone in the room was looking at him somewhat oddly, except Sheila who was smiling at him dreamily.
Next was "CROUCH, BARTY!!!" who was finally declared Hufflepuff after nearly five mintues.
After Barty Crouch was "COROLTON, ANGELA"
A tall girl with long, perfectly-groomed, chocolate-brown hair, an equally long nose, and high eyebrows stood up and glided over to the hat. She picked it up with a look of discust, as if not wanting to touch something that old and gringy, put it on, and in an instant was declared "SLYTHERIN!!!"
There were a few other people after Angela Corolton who all went to Hufflepuff and then, "Dippet, Mackenzie!!"
Mackenzie walked shakily over to the hat and placed it on her head. It must have been two full minutes before the hat finally declared her "GRYFFINDOR!!!"
Several more people were called after Mackenzie, and then "LAMONT, LILY!"
"Good--HIC--luck!" whispered Sheila as Lily stood up and boldly walked over to the Sorting Hat and put it on.
"Hmmmm..." came a voice inside Lily's head startling her so much that she nearly let out a scream, "you are a toughy Miss Lamont...you are extremely intelligent, I see that right away....but I think there's more in you than just that. You'd do splendid in Ravenclaw with your brains and all...but there seems to be something deeper in you..."
"Nothing but queasiness," thought Lily to herself.
"Well that may be true but unfortunately we don't have a house for the queasy students. It's a good thing to because everyone in the school would be in it," said the hat, chuckling to himself, "Miss Lamont...no don't say that, it's definitely not stupidity, I don't know why you are so hard on yourself, Miss Lamont. Ah, yes...it's becoming clearer now...well that about settles it, now that I see what you are REALLY capable of. Goodness, it would shock even Dumbledore, I think. I haven't seen that quality so strongly in ANYONE in eight hundred and twenty-three years. There's no doubt about it, Miss Lamont, you belong in GRYFFINDOR!!!!!"
Everyone at the Gryffindor table clapped happily as Lily walked over and sat down next to Sirius and Mackenzie at their table, relieved that it was over.
"LONGBOTTUM, FRANK!!!" screamed the Hat. But Frank Longbuttum sat
clutching his chair, refusing to move, and making strange gurgling noises. Finally Professer Saphire dragged him over to the hat and jammed it on his head. A moment later, to everyone's astonishment, the Hat pronounced him GRYFFINDOR!!! Frank Longbottum jumped out of the chair, forgetting to take the hat off, and before anyone could stop him he slid on the marble floor and came crashing down, hat and all.
The entire room gasped (a few Slytherins chuckled) as a scarlet Frank stood up, put everything back into place, and limped over to the Gryffindor table.
"LUPIN, REMUS!" shouted the hat when Frank had finally managed to get over to the Gryffindor table.
Remus Lupin, a small, pale boy with tattered robes, walked over to the hat and lifted it weakly, as if it was a heavy weight. He hadn't even set it on his head all the way when it pronounced him "GRYFFINDOR!!"
Sheila suddenly started letting out monstrous hiccups, and looked even more pale then normal.
"What's the matter with her? She sounds like a whale," said Sirius as the Sorting Hat called out "PATIL, POLINA."
Lily and Mackenzie both giggled as they imagined what the look on Sheila's face would be if she knew Sirius had just compared her to a whale.
"I never knew that whales made ANY sounds, much less loud hiccupping ones like Sheila," said Mackenzie doubtfully.
PELAFONO, PIPER--------------RAVENCLAW!!" screamed the hat and
Piper, a short, skinny girl with two yellow, curly pig-tails, hopped out of her seat and literally skipped over to the Hufflepuff table.
"Well if they DID make sounds," said Sirius as the hat pronounced Peter Pettigrew--Gryffindor-- "THAT'S what they'd sound like."
"POTTER, JAMES!" screamed the hat.
James Potter, looking a shade paler than usual, stood up and went over to the hat. Sirius gave him a thumbs-up as he slid it on over his head. A moment later, however, the hat pronounced James "Gryffindor!!!"
James gave a sigh of relief and sat down next to Sirius. The hat called out a few more names and then "SHICKABOO, SHEILA----------GRYFFINDOR" and "SNAPE, SEVERUS-----------SLYTHERIN!!!!!!"
After the last few end-of-the-alphabet kids were sorted, the rip on the side of the hat sealed itself up and Dumbledore eagerly invited everyone to "DIG IN!!!!!" and so they did, with great squeals of delightment as their plates filled up with all sorts of delicious treats. Sirius was in the middle of telling James a joke when a fat little kid with flattened, brown hair waddled over to them.
"Hi my name is Peter can I sit with you guys?"
Sirius gave him a look of discust and had all but shoed him away forever (imagine how THAT would have changed the course of events that were to come) when............
Chapter 4
"So here you are at last,
in the good ol' Hoggy Wart,
waiting, waiting, waiting,
for someone to start to sort.
"Well this must be your lucky day,
for I am just the one,
to put you in a House where it's sure,
you'll have lots of fun!
"Hufflepuff could be your match,
if you are funny and kind,
or maybe you belong in Ravenclaw,
if you have a bright mind.
"Slytherin is the place for you,
If you are clever and like to trick,
But if you're brave and honorable,
Gryffindor would be your pick.
"So when I call your name out,
Come up here to where I'm at,
Put me on and I'll put assign you a house,
For I'm a Sorting Hat!!!!
Everyone in the Great Hall clapped enthusiastically as the Sorting Hat finished his song, but were immediately hushed as the magnified voice of the Hat called out the first person.
"ALGAE, BERTHA!!!!!!"
Bertha Algae stood up with a smirk, waddled over to the sorting hat, and jammed it over her head (she was somewhat of a large girl and even the Sorting Hat had trouble fitting over her head).
Two seconds had not even passed when the hat shouted out, "SLYTHERIN!!!!"
Bertha did not look the least bit surprised as she yanked the hat off and waddled over to the Slytherin table.
"BLACK, SIRIUS!" screamed the hat as soon as Bertha managed to squeeze out of it.
Sirius jumped up from his seat and went over to the Sorting Hat and put it on.
"AHHHHHHHH!!!! I'M DROWNING!!!!!!!!!" he screamed as the massive
hat enveloped nearly all of his head. The entire Great Hall burst out laughing. A minute or two later, the hat pronounced him, "GRYFFINDOR!"
Sirius, looking rather harrassed, took the hat off and dropped it back on the chair with a look of discust. Then, with a good-humored laugh, he marched right over to the Gryffindor table and sat down. Everyone in the room was looking at him somewhat oddly, except Sheila who was smiling at him dreamily.
Next was "CROUCH, BARTY!!!" who was finally declared Hufflepuff after nearly five mintues.
After Barty Crouch was "COROLTON, ANGELA"
A tall girl with long, perfectly-groomed, chocolate-brown hair, an equally long nose, and high eyebrows stood up and glided over to the hat. She picked it up with a look of discust, as if not wanting to touch something that old and gringy, put it on, and in an instant was declared "SLYTHERIN!!!"
There were a few other people after Angela Corolton who all went to Hufflepuff and then, "Dippet, Mackenzie!!"
Mackenzie walked shakily over to the hat and placed it on her head. It must have been two full minutes before the hat finally declared her "GRYFFINDOR!!!"
Several more people were called after Mackenzie, and then "LAMONT, LILY!"
"Good--HIC--luck!" whispered Sheila as Lily stood up and boldly walked over to the Sorting Hat and put it on.
"Hmmmm..." came a voice inside Lily's head startling her so much that she nearly let out a scream, "you are a toughy Miss Lamont...you are extremely intelligent, I see that right away....but I think there's more in you than just that. You'd do splendid in Ravenclaw with your brains and all...but there seems to be something deeper in you..."
"Nothing but queasiness," thought Lily to herself.
"Well that may be true but unfortunately we don't have a house for the queasy students. It's a good thing to because everyone in the school would be in it," said the hat, chuckling to himself, "Miss Lamont...no don't say that, it's definitely not stupidity, I don't know why you are so hard on yourself, Miss Lamont. Ah, yes...it's becoming clearer now...well that about settles it, now that I see what you are REALLY capable of. Goodness, it would shock even Dumbledore, I think. I haven't seen that quality so strongly in ANYONE in eight hundred and twenty-three years. There's no doubt about it, Miss Lamont, you belong in GRYFFINDOR!!!!!"
Everyone at the Gryffindor table clapped happily as Lily walked over and sat down next to Sirius and Mackenzie at their table, relieved that it was over.
"LONGBOTTUM, FRANK!!!" screamed the Hat. But Frank Longbuttum sat
clutching his chair, refusing to move, and making strange gurgling noises. Finally Professer Saphire dragged him over to the hat and jammed it on his head. A moment later, to everyone's astonishment, the Hat pronounced him GRYFFINDOR!!! Frank Longbottum jumped out of the chair, forgetting to take the hat off, and before anyone could stop him he slid on the marble floor and came crashing down, hat and all.
The entire room gasped (a few Slytherins chuckled) as a scarlet Frank stood up, put everything back into place, and limped over to the Gryffindor table.
"LUPIN, REMUS!" shouted the hat when Frank had finally managed to get over to the Gryffindor table.
Remus Lupin, a small, pale boy with tattered robes, walked over to the hat and lifted it weakly, as if it was a heavy weight. He hadn't even set it on his head all the way when it pronounced him "GRYFFINDOR!!"
Sheila suddenly started letting out monstrous hiccups, and looked even more pale then normal.
"What's the matter with her? She sounds like a whale," said Sirius as the Sorting Hat called out "PATIL, POLINA."
Lily and Mackenzie both giggled as they imagined what the look on Sheila's face would be if she knew Sirius had just compared her to a whale.
"I never knew that whales made ANY sounds, much less loud hiccupping ones like Sheila," said Mackenzie doubtfully.
PELAFONO, PIPER--------------RAVENCLAW!!" screamed the hat and
Piper, a short, skinny girl with two yellow, curly pig-tails, hopped out of her seat and literally skipped over to the Hufflepuff table.
"Well if they DID make sounds," said Sirius as the hat pronounced Peter Pettigrew--Gryffindor-- "THAT'S what they'd sound like."
"POTTER, JAMES!" screamed the hat.
James Potter, looking a shade paler than usual, stood up and went over to the hat. Sirius gave him a thumbs-up as he slid it on over his head. A moment later, however, the hat pronounced James "Gryffindor!!!"
James gave a sigh of relief and sat down next to Sirius. The hat called out a few more names and then "SHICKABOO, SHEILA----------GRYFFINDOR" and "SNAPE, SEVERUS-----------SLYTHERIN!!!!!!"
After the last few end-of-the-alphabet kids were sorted, the rip on the side of the hat sealed itself up and Dumbledore eagerly invited everyone to "DIG IN!!!!!" and so they did, with great squeals of delightment as their plates filled up with all sorts of delicious treats. Sirius was in the middle of telling James a joke when a fat little kid with flattened, brown hair waddled over to them.
"Hi my name is Peter can I sit with you guys?"
Sirius gave him a look of discust and had all but shoed him away forever (imagine how THAT would have changed the course of events that were to come) when............