3 Guys, 2 Girls, and a Whole
Lotta Morons.
By Mythakazu
Well, it's kind of a long
story where this one came from. Okay, it's writer's block. Just plain ol'
writer's block. It's the ultimate quest for the plot! This is a crazed RPG
kinda crossover, where I go on an adventure that a crazed being sends me on.
Crossovers from Kirby, Pokemon, Bomberman, and more! Have fun, everybody!
Intro: The sun is shining
over the horizon, and on a house sitting on a hilltop, a few trees growing
nearby. Ahh, yes. Serene, peaceful tranquility. Until..
"BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!"
In the house, the digital
alarm clock next to Mythakazu's bed hopped up and down and blared 7:00,
bleeping for the entire forest to hear. Outside, squirrels fell out of trees,
bears covered their ears and roared in pain, and a nearby traveling troop of
horses threw off their riders and starting doing the Polka for unexplainable
reasons. Go figure.
"Ah, schizzles, I don't
wanna get u-… Dang, I'm already awake" She mumbled, trying to find the off
button. Being unsuccessful, she grabbed a large mallet out of no where and
proceeded to smash in random spots around the clock. After the dust and
feathers cleared, the clock was still beeping in a pile of splintered wood.
Slapping her head, Mythakazu put on her orange mage hat and yoinked out the
plug.
"BEEP! BEEP!
BEeeee….-fizzle-"
Dusting her hands off, Myth
proceeded to walk to the other side of the room and switch on her laptop. The
annoying start up sound played, she waited for the blasted machine to load, ate
a donut, waited, ate a donut, waited some more, watched CSPAN, waited, went to
the bathroom, waited… No, wait, that's what she would of done for a Macintosh
computer, my bad. She immediately went to her writing program and tried to
think of another crazed story.
"Lesse… Hmm… No… No… Uh uh…
Nada… Sheesh, I think that alarm fried something…"
Suddenly, an info box
popped up on her computer screen.
"Writer's block, eh?" it
said, that little 'doo!' accompanying it.
Mythakazu wheeled back a
little in her swivel chair. Another hacker, great, just what the world needed…
"No, before you freak out
because I can read your mind, I'm not a hacker." The message changed, that
annoying 'doo!' sounding.
"You must be from the IRS!
I kneeeeeew it!"
Yet another message popped
up, with that… You know, sound. "Heck no, kid. I am… -DRAMATIC PAUSE-" the
message said directly, "GWEDASIPOT!"
……….
"Gwedsasipot? Sounds like a
new narcotic or something…" Myth said, giving the computer screen a disgusted
look.
"Shut u- …. I mean,
silence!" The screen now said. "I understand you have writer's block, correct?"
The text message said. The blue bird nodded, wondering who the heck this is.
Darn those commies. "You see, I can help you overcome that obstacle, with many…
Er… Riches to boot!"
"Huzza! Gimmie the cash!
So, how do I do this?" Myth shouted hyperishly. The laptop beeped.
"You must go on a crazed
quest which no one with half a mind would attempt, with dangers all over the
place, all the way to TerraTerra Mountain, to receive your plot! But I warn
you, it's very ris-"
"There's the riches,
right?"
"Yes, but it's dange-"
"Lots of them?"
"Well, yes, but-"
"Alright! I'm outta here!
To TerraTerra mountain and the quest for the plot!"
"-sigh-"
Mythakazu grabs a backpack,
shoves a couple potions and $500 (Dollars will be the official currency of
this, since it's not really biased on any game) and dashed out the door,
leaving the wrecked radio, the messages about danger, and her internet
connection.
After a while of running,
she looking up above her head and noticed some random numbers floating there.
Blinking, she rubbed her eyes and made sure she wasn't hallucinating.
"Dang alarm… 30/30? 15/15?
Lvl. 5? The hey?" She said, staring at the numbers. Shrugging, she starting
running forward again, towards the nearest town. She passed the Polka horses,
which were now doing a hoedown. Backing away slowly, she continued her trip.
-KERAWANNIAN CITY-, the big
shiny white letters that just popped on the screen read.
"Kerawannian city? Uh…."
Myth stared at all the people wandering around town. Many appeared to be drunk,
and others had small, blue, red spiked crocodile of some sort on a leash.
"Hello, freakish looking
traveler!" One man said, his crocodile thingy chewing on a sleeve of his
medieval outfit. Everyone was dressed in medieval clothing. Yet there was a
couple flashing neon billboards nearby. "Welcome to Kerawannian city! Me and
Jaws here wish you a fine stay!"
"That's nice, but why are
people seemingly drunk, and what are those blue thingys?"
"Oh, it's the KeroKero
colas! They're insanely popular in this town, and people just drink so darn
many!" The guy said, smiling. What a freakish civilization, Myth thought. "The
blue things are Totodiles, the city's official… something or other!"
"Bite me." Myth said. Bad
idea, for hearing this, 'Jaws' immediately jumped up and took a large chomp on
Mythakazu's wing. "OW! Get it off! Get it friggin off!" She began to run around
crazily, trying to shake the Totodile off. The guy then pulled out a steak, and
Jaws started to rabidly chew on it, sending wet pieces of raw meat everywhere.
"Eeeeeww…"
Myth walked away from the
man and his pet, and decided to see if she could get a map anywhere. But then
again, she probably didn't need it, right? I mean, how far could TerraTerra
Mountain be?
"Let's see…" She said,
reading a map she recently purchased. "TerraTerra mountain is… Oooh, right next
to here! Ahahahaha! What a loser that Guadapan or whatever he was is… Er, I'm
confusing myself…." Myth then looking at the legend on the map. "Star's a
capital, blah blah blah… One inch is equal to… 6 304 432 430 36 and a half
MILES? #$^#$@!"
Mythakazu sat down on a
bench and was reading the map, trying to devise the quickest route to the next
town, according to the current placement of the planets, the phases of the
moon, the rate that kids grow out of new clothes… Actually, she was trying to
fold the darn thing.
"Stupid, half arsed maps…
Arrrghh… Everything wants to act up for me today…" She sneered, trying to get
the map under control, and getting numerous paper cuts in the process.
Suddenly, Myth was interrupted by a couple of arguing voices nearby.
"It's your fault! YOU got
us lost!"
"Myu! Did not!"
"All that whining on the
ship distracted me! It's not my fault I crashed! And now we're in the middle of
nowhere! I tell you, you got us lost!"
"Did not!"
"Did too!"
"Did not!"
"Too!"
"Not! Myu!"
Not being able to take it
any longer, Myth jumped up and chucked the map hard at the voices, not
bothering to look. There was a loud 'CRASH' and a cheer.
"Yaaay! Thank you, myu!
Pommy doesn't want to lose an argument!"
Myth blinked, and looked. A
little orange thingy with rabbit ears was smiling happily, while an unconscious
Bomberman was lying next to him.
"Uh, whoops… I don't think
he's gonna be too happy when he wakes up… I didn't know I could throw that
hard.."
"Pommy thinks that's crazy.
Judging by the hat on your head, Pommy says you have magic powers, myu! And
magic people are phi-zee-call-ee weak!"
"It's physically. And…
Well, I guess I can't explain that. So, why the heck are you guys in this
crazed drunken town?"
"Bomberman crash the space
ship because he can't drive worth beans, myu… We crashed nearby and need
another ship."
Myth stood and thought for
a while, before prying a rabid looking Totodile off her hat. "Uh, why don't you
come with me to TerraTerra mountain, on my impeccable quest for The Plot!"
-Holy voices- Aaaahhhhhh…
"….Couldn't we just go to
the nearest town that sells mechanical parts, myu?" The little rabbit,
obviously named Pommy (Duh.) questioned, blinking. I want a corn dog, Myth
thought.
"No, because I'm in
desperate need of help for this adventure 'cause I su- I mean… I need comic
relief! Heh heh… Plus, c'mon, what's a crazed RPG without crazed assistants?"
Just then, Bomberman opened
his eyes, and pulled the map off his head.
"My head… What was that, a
slab of concrete?" He said, blinking. "…A map?"
"Maybe I AM stronger than I
look. Then again, that map has too many folds to count."
"YOU threw it?"
"Well…"
"Eat dirt, unholy beast of
the great beyond of insanity and English muffins! Ahahahahaha!"
"…"
Pommy, Bomberman and
Mythakazu turn and see Earthworm Jim holding his raygun up to some unknown
monster.
"Whoops, sorry to interrupt
your argument, folks!" He said, before a cow fell on his head.
"…That was… Odd" Myth
muttered, staring at the sheer weirdness of it all. "Now, where were we?"
"I think I was getting mad
at you, and was getting ready to reduce you to smoldering ash." The white
bomber said, holding a.. You guessed it, bomb, in his spherical hands.
"Hyy-ah!" He shouted, in that high pitched voice of his as Bomberman chucked
the explosive device at Myth.
"Arse! Run awaaayyy!" She
screamed, jumping from the blast and running around the town. Pommy sat on the
bench and ate some popcorn. A guy walked up and offered him a KeroKero cola,
which he took.
"Myu, this soda's good!
Pommy wants to know what it's made of!" The guy nearby smiled, and pointed to
the ingredients listed on the back of the can. "…Mmmhmm… Yeah……. FROG?" The guy
nodded and pointed it's the reason for KeroKero cola. "Pommy going to be
siiicckkk…"
Doo doo doo doo, dee doo!
Bomberman and Pommy have
joined your forked up party!
"What party?" Myth
questioned. "Is it my birthday, or something?"
And now, before the end of
the chapter, I'd like to present..
Mytha K.'s Korner!
Myth: That's right! After
every chapter, I'm gonna provide all of you viewers with a little info on the
story! Now, first of all. How did the crazed Kerawanni city thing get its name?
Well, Kera was just a slightly changed version of Kero, from the cola those
crazed drunked residents drink. Wanninoko is the Japanese name for Totodile,
which they use as pets. Actually, as the town's official… something or other!
Oh, and KeroKero cola is that drink from Mario RPG that costs a killing!… I'm
sure it doesn't contain frog in the game (eeew!) but I decided to add that, 'cause
there's this anime called Kerropi and friends or something like that, and he's
a frog. Um, yay?
Anyway, this is going to
end up being a looooong story, based on what that evil folding map said (DIE!).
Pleeeease read and review, or you'll dampen my humoristic spirits! ;_; All
characters are copyright themselves/their respected companies. Yes, even the
crazed drunken citizens of the town.
