Title: Hostage Situation
Authors: liz_Z and Invision
Rating: PG-13
Summary: "The Gang" is sent out to save some kidnapped children.
Spoilers: Nope
Disclaimer: We don't own "The Invisible Man" or any of the characters. We are not making any money off of this.
Note: I think liz_Z needs a round of applause 'cause she edited this baby all by herself.
Darien, Claire, and Eberts played by: Invision
Hobbes, Alex, and the Official played by: liz_Z
Everyone else played by: Umm, I don't remember, I lost track. Either Invision or liz_Z. Does it really matter which? Now on to the story...
___________________________
The Official's office, DAY. Darien, Hobbes, Claire, and Alex are there, as well as the Official and Eberts.
Official: Well everyone, I'm sure you're wondering why I called you into my office.
Darien: The thought had crossed my mind.
Official: I've got a mission for you.
Hobbes (sarcastically): No kidding.
Official: A very special mission. One that requires all of you.
Alex: Oh, great. I take it I'm paying my way again?
Eberts: Our budget is not large enough to support your fees, Agent Monroe.
Alex: (rolls her eyes) Of course not. Your budget can't even support the fees for a new copying machine.
Darien: She's got a point there, Eberts.
Hobbes: Yeah, and I'm very overdue for a raise...
*The Official glares at Hobbes.*
Darien: Hobbes, you're never gonna get that raise, haven't you figured that out by now?
Hobbes: Hey, a guy can dream, can't he?
Darien: Yeah, that's about all you can do around here.
*The Official glances over at Claire.*
Official: Do you have that extra counteragent synthesized?
Claire: Yes, it's ready and waiting.
Official: All right, then. (clears his throat) This mission is of the utmost importance.
Hobbes: Umm, sir?
Official: Yes, Hobbes?
Hobbes: What is the mission?
Darien: Good question, Hobbes.
Official: I was just getting to that, now would you shut up and let me speak?
Darien: Yes, please continue.
Official: A group of terrorists are holding some children hostage.
Hobbes: That's it?
Official: These are the children of some very influential families.
Darien: We have to rescue some children?
Official: Yes. But, as I said before, these are not just any children. They are all the children of bureaucrats and millionaires. A large sum of money has been offered if we can release them.
Darien: Really? Where's that money going to go?
Official: To the Agency, if we're the group that manages to stop the terrorists.
Hobbes: So basically, we're never going to see it again.
Darien: You wouldn't want to use it for, oh, say gland research? Or maybe you could finally give Hobbes a raise?
Official: Well, we have some... debts... to pay off first, but after that, we'll see.
Hobbes: (groans) Oh, here we go again...
Darien: Well Alex, I guess that means no new copy machine.
Alex: Exactly what are we going to do on this mission? I assume from what you said to Claire that it involves a lot of invisibility.
Official: Darien is going to smuggle you and Hobbes into the complex, and then the three of you are going to rescue those children.
Darien: (glances at Hobbes and Alex) Gee, this should be fun.
Hobbes: Hey, is Claire coming too?
Official: Yes.
Hobbes: She's gonna stay in the van then, right?
Official: No.
Claire; Why should I, Bobby?
Hobbes: Oh, no reason, just wondering... Just looking out for my colleague's safety, that's all.
Darien: Aw, how sweet. Hobbesy is worried about you, Claire.
*Hobbes glares at Darien.*
Claire: (rolls her eyes) Darien, please.
Darien: What? I'm just saying that's nice.
Alex: So, is Claire going into the building?
Official: Of course. She needs to administer Fawkes' counteragent.
Claire: There's no telling when and where Darien might need a shot.
Official: That's why I had you make some extra counteragent.
Darien: I'm not going to have to quicksilver these children am I?
Official: I doubt it. Your main objective once you get inside the building is to take out the terrorists.
Darien: But there's a chance I may have to, right? Do we have enough of the blue stuff for that?
Official: Not enough to rescue all of the children. At least, not without you going insane.
Darien: We don't have the time to make some more just in case?
Official: The terrorists have issued a twelve-hour deadline for their demands to be met. Then they start killing children. Unfortunately, the place that the children are being held is approximately ten hours away.
Darien: So I guess we need to get started.
Official: Exactly. Considering the circumstances, you're lucky we have as much counteragent as we do. Now, get out there and save those kids.
**********
The van, AFTERNOON. Hobbes is driving, Darien is sitting in the passenger's seat, and Alex and Claire are situated in the back.
Darien: So how much longer do we have?
Hobbes: About six hours. Now shush.
Darien: Well I was just asking.
Hobbes: Well, stop asking, okay? That's the third time in the last twenty minutes you've asked me that.
Darien: Well...
Claire: Would you two quit acting like children?
Hobbes: Aw, come on Claire, give me a break, will ya? He's getting on my nerves!
Alex: And you're both getting on my nerves.
Darien: Claire, would you tell him to shut up? He'll listen to you.
Claire: Both of you need to be quiet.
Alex: Yes. So both of you just shut up.
*Everyone glares at Alex.*
Darien: Someone woke up on the wrong side of the coffin this morning.
*Hobbes snickers.*
Alex: Excuse me?
Darien: You heard me. Maybe you should try decaff.
Alex: I don't drink coffee.
Hobbes: Of course not. You're too busy drinking those grass shakes.
Darien: Those incredibly gross grass shakes.
Hobbes: Yeah, with a little weed-killer on the side.
Alex: If you two don't shut up, then so help me I'll...
Darien: Oh, we're scared Alex.
Hobbes: Yeah, what're you gonna do, force-feed us grass shakes 'till we burst?
*Alex mutters angrily to herself.*
Claire: Why don't you guys just cool it, all right?
Hobbes: Aw, come on Claire, we were just starting to have fun!
Darien: Yeah, Claire. You really need a sense of humor.
Hobbes: (yawns) Hey, does anyone else want to drive? I'm getting kind of tired.
Darien: I don't think we should let Alex drive. I see a case of road rage in her future.
*Alex glares icily at Darien.*
Claire: Relax, I will drive.
Hobbes: Good. If Darien had volunteered, I don't think we would've lived long enough to try and catch those terrorists.
Darien: Watch yourself, Hobbes. Your driving isn't all that hot either.
Hobbes: (as he pulls over to the side of the road) Well, I haven't had an accident yet, have I?
Darien: Well neither have I.
Hobbes: That's because I never let you drive, my friend.
*Darien opens his mouth to speak.*
Claire: I'll settle this, you both can't drive. Happy?
Hobbes: No! I can drive very well, thank you very much.
Alex: Said the man as he crashed into a nearby stump.
Darien: Hey, that was pretty good Alex.
Alex: (smirks) Thank you.
Hobbes: There may be hope for you yet.
Alex: Okay, now you're pushing it.
Darien: Yeah, we wouldn't want to start liking her, now would we Hobbes?
Claire: If you keep arguing, we're never going to get there.
Hobbes: Yeah, we've already wasted ten minutes arguing like this. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to move to the back seat.
**********
The van, NIGHT. Claire pulls to a stop outside a large group of buildings. Alex is sitting in the passenger seat, Darien and Hobbes are in the back. Both are asleep.
Claire: Wake up everyone. We're here.
*Hobbes snores. Darien snores even louder. Alex pushes Hobbes' and Darien's arms.*
Alex: Wake up, you big oafs.
Darien: Garfugle...
Hobbes: 'M awake...
Alex: Come on you two, we're there!
Darien: Just five more minutes mommy.
Hobbes: Huh? We're there already?
*Alex rolls her eyes.*
Claire: There's the building, so we must be there.
Hobbes: Eew! Fawkes, get off me!
*He looks over at Alex and Claire.*
Hobbes: Hey guys, get him off me, will ya? He's drooling on me!
*Claire laughs.*
Darien: Wha? Are we there yet?
Hobbes: Yes, now get off me! You're drooling all over my shirt!
*Alex snickers.*
Claire: Actually you were, Darien.
Hobbes: Yeah, so get off me before you ruin my pants too!
Darien: Sorry Hobbsey.
Hobbes: And I liked this shirt, too...
Alex: Come on guys, we've got a job to do.
Darien: You can wash it, Hobbes. It's not like I have cooties.
Alex: Hello? Remember the kids? We've only got... (glances at her watch) ...An hour and a half left before the trouble starts.
Claire: Alex is right. Come along, children. You're wasting valuable time.
Hobbes: I am not a child!
Darien: Hobbes was the one making the big deal.
Hobbes: Well, it's one of my favorite shirts!
Alex: Oh, don't start that again. Let's go.
*Everyone walks toward the building.*
Darien: (whistles) This is a big place.
Hobbes: Well, it's a boarding school. It needs to be big.
Alex: So, who goes in with Darien first?
Claire: I guess I'll go in first.
Hobbes: You sure about that? I mean, it's probably gonna be real dangerous in there, and...
Claire: I can take care of myself, Bobby.
Hobbes: I know that, I'm just saying... I dunno, shouldn't I go first?
Claire: If you want to, Bobby. I was just offering to go in first.
Hobbes: Okay then, I'll go first.
Alex: And then me.
Darien: That would make Claire last. Is everyone okay with that?
Hobbes: Yeah.
Alex: Yeah.
Claire: That's fine with me.
Darien: All right then.
*Darien quicksilvers himself, and Hobbes. They enter the building.*
Hobbes: Okay, I can take it from here. Go back out for Alex.
*Darien leaves Hobbes and walks back outside.*
Darien: You're up, Alex.
Alex: Okay.
*Darien quicksilvers Alex.*
Alex: Wow, that is so... never mind. Let's go.
Darien: Impressed?
Alex: Well, maybe a little.
Darien: Just a little?
Alex: Hey, coming from me that's a compliment.
Darien: No argument here.
*Darien and Alex go into the building. Darien finds Hobbes and de-quicksilvers.*
Hobbes: Hey, give me a little warning before you do that!
Darien: Please. Okay, I'm off to get the last one.
Hobbes: Keep her safe, partner.
Darien: No need to worry, Bobby.
Hobbes: That's what worries me.
*Darien waves as he quicksilvers. Darien de-quicksilvers outside.*
Darien: You ready Claire?
Claire: As I'll ever be.
*Darien quicksilvers Claire.*
Claire: Wow!
*Darien and Claire make their way over to Hobbes and Alex. Darien and Claire de-quicksilver. Hobbes jumps.*
Hobbes: Fawkes, what did I tell you about that?
Darien: Come on, Hobbes. Quit being so jumpy.
Hobbes: It's my job. Now, let's get going.
Darien: Uh, Claire. I need a little shot.
*Darien shows Claire his tattoo, which only has two segments left.*
Claire: I'd say you do.
*Claire gives Darien his shot. All the segments return to green.*
Alex: Okay, let's go. I think I hear something in the next room.
*Everyone walks into the next room. Two children are inside, guarded by two terrorists with BIG guns.*
Darien: Aw crap...
*Hobbes and Alex draw their guns.*
Hobbes: Freeze!
Alex: On the ground! Now!
*The terrorists just laugh and aim their guns at Hobbes and Alex.*
Darien: Aw crap.
Hobbes: Aw crap is right!
Claire: I think we better run...
Alex: So run already!
*Everyone runs back out the door and ducks into the hall. The terrorists shoot their machine guns through the doorway.*
Darien: So now what?
Hobbes: Why're you asking me? I'm making this up as I go!
Darien: Well, Alex? You're the five-star agent.
Alex: Well, you could go invisible and run in there and knock those terrorists out as soon as they stop shooting.
Darien: Yeah, I do all the work as usual.
Alex: Well, it's better than being turned into Swiss cheese, isn't it?
Darien: Yeah, let's just hope they don't have more guns. Then I'll be invisible Swiss cheese.
*The terrorists stop shooting so they can reload their guns.*
Hobbes: Now's your chance, partner!
Darien: Here goes...
*Darien goes invisible and runs into the room.*
Darien: Hey guys.
*The evil guys look up.*
Darien: No, over here.
*Darien knocks the two men out.*
1st kid: Auggh!
2nd kid: What the...
1st kid: I KNEW there were invisible monsters in here!
2nd kid: That's not possible you dummy!
Hobbes: Fawkes, what's going on? What's taking you so long?
Darien: These kids are fighting.
1st kid: I want my mommy!
2nd kid: You baby!
Darien: What should I do?
Alex: Get them out of there before the terrorists wake up!
*The two children are lifted by an unseen force.*
1st kid: WAAAAHHHHH!!!!
2nd kid: Hey! We're floating!
*Darien de-quicksilvers.*
Hobbes: Come on, let's get outta here!
Darien: How many of these kids do we have to find?
Alex: Umm... about thirty all together, I think.
Darien: Thirty? That's a lot of little kids to be dealing with.
Hobbes: And they won't all fit in the van, that's for sure.
Darien: Is anybody here good with kids?
Alex: I'm good, but I'm not that good.
Darien: Uh, how 'bout you Claire?
Hobbes: Yeah, how about you?
Claire: Well, I'm okay with kids. I guess. What about you, Bobby?
Hobbes: Well, I'm always willing to try something new.
Darien: Please. Hobbes good with kids?
Hobbes: Hey, I said I'm willing to try. I didn't say I'll succeed.
1st kid: *sniffles* I want my mommy...
2nd kid: Quit crying you big baby! Hey mister, how did you do that?
Hobbes: It's need to know.
Darien: (at the same time) Magic.
Hobbes: That too.
Claire: Look, we need to find these other children fast.
Hobbes: Okay, I've got a plan. Claire, you and Alex go outside and watch the kids, while Darien and me try to smuggle more of 'em out.
Darien: Yeah, that sounds like a plan.
Alex: How come I have to help watch the kids?
Hobbes: 'Cause I thought of the plan.
Darien: Yeah, and 'cause me and Hobbes work better alone.
Alex: I think you guys forgot something...
*She points at the two terrorists lying unconscious on the floor.*
Darien: Yeah. So you and Claire better take these kids out to the van.
Hobbes: We'll take care of these guys.
Claire: What if you need a shot?
Hobbes: I can give him his shots if you'll just give me the blue stuff.
Claire: You sure? I didn't think you liked needles.
Hobbes: I hate 'em. But I don't exactly want Fawkesy here going wacko on me either.
Claire: All right. Here you go. Be careful with it. It's all we have.
Hobbes: Hey, careful is my middle name.
Darien: Yeah right. Ok, you two better get going.
*Alex picks up the 1st kid. Claire picks up the 2nd kid. The two of them walk out of the room.*
Darien: Okay, let's find these other kids. They could be anywhere in this place.
Hobbes: Yeah, but first we need to tie these guys up.
*He points to the unconscious terrorists.*
Darien: That's a good idea. You see any rope?
Hobbes: No, but there's some telephone cord running along the wall over there.
*Hobbes and Darien tie up the mean terrorists with the telephone cord.*
Darien: Problem solved. Let's find these kids.
Hobbes: Here. (hands Darien his gun) You might need this.
Darien: I don't need a gun, Hobbes.
*Hobbes picks up one of the terrorist's machine guns.*
Hobbes: Maybe not, but I wanna try out one of these babies.
*Hobbes grabs several machine gun clips off of the unconscious guards.*
Darien: Yeah, you just be careful who you're pointing that thing at.
Hobbes: Don't worry. (prepares the gun to fire) I'll be real careful.
Darien: Gee, I have no worries. Bobby Hobbes: Rambo of the Agency.
Hobbes: And proud of it, my friend. Now let's get those kids out of here before the other terrorists find out we're here.
*Darien and Hobbes continue to search the building.
They duck into a doorway as two terrorists walk down the hall.*
First terrorist: So have you seen the new episode of Maury Povich yet?
*Hobbes slams the butt of his gun down on the back of the first terrorist's head.*
Second terrorist: What the-
*Hobbes slams the second terrorist's head into the nearest wall.*
Darien: Good one, Bobby.
Hobbes: I'd like to see you pull off something like that.
Darien: Oh I could.
Hobbes: Sure you could, Fawkes...
Darien: I could, I was just letting you have some fun.
*Darien and Hobbes drag the terrorists into a nearby room and tie them up.*
Darien: How much time do we have left?
Hobbes: (checks his watch) About an hour. We've got to work fast.
Darien: If you were a terrorist, where would you put a bunch of kids?
Hobbes: I'd go for the mess hall.
Darien: That's what I'm thinking.
Hobbes: I knew I should've asked the Official for a map of this place...
Darien: I guess they wouldn't have brochures anywhere would they?
Hobbes: Shh. I think I hear something.
Darien: I don't hear anything.
Hobbes: You don't hear that little crying noise? I think I hear a crying noise.
Darien: No, I didn't hear that little crying noise.
Hobbes: Come on, follow me.
*Darien and Hobbes round a corner in the hall and come face to face with two terrorists guarding a bathroom.*
Darien: Aw crap...
Hobbes: Oops.
*Hobbes lifts the machine gun and shoots the terrorists.*
Darien: I guess we know what your 'crying noise' was.
*The sounds of a child crying start to float out of the bathroom.*
Hobbes: Yeah, I guess we do.
*Hobbes opens the bathroom door. A kid, David, is standing near the sink, looking fearfully at the blood pooling on the floor.*
Darien: Hey, buddy. We're here to help you, all right?
David: Okay...
Hobbes: Are there any other kids in the building with you?
David: Yeah, lots of kids. They're all down in the cafeteria...
Darien: Looks like you were right, Hobbes.
Hobbes: Can you show us where that is?
*David nods.*
Darien: Are there any bad guys with them?
David: Yeah. Lots of bad guys. With big guns and stuff.
Hobbes: Well, that's just great.
Darien: What are we gonna do with this one? We can't take him in there with us.
Hobbes: Umm... I'm thinking, don't rush me. (pauses for a second) Okay, here's what we do. We have the kid show us where the cafeteria is, and then we can hide him in a laundry bin or something.
Darien: Great plan.
Hobbes: Hey, I'm making this up as I go, okay?
Darien: Okay, we better think of how we're gonna handle those guys in the cafeteria. We can't just go in there and start shooting.
Hobbes: That part's easy. You go see-through and sneak into the room. Figure out how many guys there are, then we'll think of something else.
Darien: All right, we better get going.
Hobbes: Yeah. Hey kid, which way do we go?
*David grabs Darien's hand.*
David: Follow me.
Darien: Lead the way, buddy.
*David leads them down several corridors, finally stopping in front of a big set of double-doors.*
David: That's the cafeteria.
Darien: Ok, we better find some place to hide you.
Hobbes: Hey, how about that room over there?
*He points toward a small office.*
Darien: That looks good.
Hobbes: Okay, you go see-through and I'll hide the kid here.
Darien: Here goes...
*Darien quicksilvers and enters the cafeteria. He stares, shocked, at the scene.*
Darien: (thinking) Aw crap... There must be 20 or 25 guys in here. How in the world are we gonna do this?
*Darien exits the cafeteria and de-quicksilvers in front of Hobbes.*
Hobbes: I hid the kid. He should be okay.
Darien: There are tons of terrorist guys in there, Hobbes. About 20 of 'em.
Hobbes: Oh great. Just what we need...
Darien: How in the world are we gonna do this?
Hobbes: Okay, here's the deal. You go cellophane and quicksilver me too. We knock out as many of those creeps as we can before I reappear. After that... well, after that it gets messy.
Darien: Yeah, we're gonna have to make it quick though.
Hobbes: Yeah. We don't have much time left.
Darien: You ready?
Hobbes: (takes a deep breath, then holds out his hand) Okay, do me.
*Darien quicksilvers Hobbes and himself. They walk into the cafeteria.*
Darien: I'll take the left half, you take the right?
Hobbes: Sure.
*Hobbes smacks a terrorist on the back of the head with the butt of his machine gun. Darien smashes a terrorist into the wall. The other terrorists watch with confusion on their faces.*
Terrorist leader: We're being attacked!
Terrorist # 2: By who? I can't see anyone.
Terrorist # 3: It's ghosts!
*Darien knocks out Terrorist #2.*
Terrorist # 4: This place is haunted!
*Hobbes has just knocked out two terrorists when he suddenly reappears.*
Hobbes: Aw crap!
Terrorist leader: (points at Hobbes) Shoot him!
*Hobbes pushes over a nearby table and ducks behind it. The children scream and duck under tables as the terrorists start to open fire in Hobbes' direction. Hobbes returns fire. Darien knocks out a terrorist and then glances at his wrist.*
Darien: Aw crap.
Hobbes: Fawkes, you'd better take cover unless you want to be Swiss cheese!
*Darien runs over and ducks behind the table with Hobbes, reappearing.*
Darien: Hobbes, we have a little problem.
*Hobbes fires off a couple rounds at the terrorists and then looks back at Darien.*
Hobbes: What?
Darien: I need a ahhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!
Hobbes: (looks over at Darien) Fawkes, you okay? You get shot or something?
*Darien looks up at Hobbes with blood red eyes.*
Darien: Oh I'm fine, Robert.
Hobbes: Aw CRAP!
Darien: Everything's okay. I'm just tired of these guys shooting at us.
*Darien quicksilvers.*
Hobbes: Fawkes, get back here!
*Hobbes feels where Darien was a moment ago, but Darien is gone.*
Darien: I'm going to take care of this, Robert.
*Darien smacks two terrorists' heads together. Hobbes tries to fire his gun, but nothing happens.*
Hobbes: Oh great, out of bullets. (yelling) Fawkes, what did you do with my gun?
*Darien sneaks up behind Terrorist #4.*
Darien: Hello, Mr. Terrorist.
*Darien hits the man on the head with Hobbes' gun. Suddenly the terrorist leader places his gun against Hobbes' head.*
Terrorist leader: Hello there.
*Darien knocks out three more guys.*
Hobbes: Hi. I'd suggest you get your men to surrender right now.
Terrorist leader: And I'd suggest you get your invisible friend to stop playing ghost or I'll blow your brains out.
Darien: That wouldn't be very nice.
Terrorist leader: Nice isn't in the job description. Now, if you would be so kind as to show yourself...
Darien: Okay.
*Darien de-quicksilvers the gun.
Hobbes ducks, pushing the terrorist leader's gun barrel away from his head.
Darien fires at the terrorist. The bullet hits the terrorist in the shoulder. The terrorist leader cries out in pain, Hobbes takes the opportunity to trip him.*
Darien: Time to die Mr. Bad Guy.
Hobbes: Wait! I can handle it from here.
Darien: I don't think so, Robert.
Hobbes: You don't want to kill this guy, Fawkes. You know that.
Darien: Do I?
Hobbes: Nah, you probably don't. But you will. Just trust me here, all right partner? We're here for the kids, remember?
*A nearby child whimpers*.
Darien: I know. This guy is responsible for them being here, right? Why shouldn't I put him out of our misery?
Hobbes: 'Cause then all his little terrorist buddies are gonna blow our brains out. And no offense, but I don't want to die just yet.
Darien: Bobby Hobbes, afraid of death?
Hobbes: Hey, I'm not afraid of anything. I'd just prefer to live a little longer. Come on, you don't want to die this way, do you?
Darien: We're all going to die eventually anyway. Might as well take someone with us.
*Darien aims the gun at the terrorist leader. Hobbes jumps in the way.*
Darien: Robert, what are you doing?
Hobbes: Trying to keep you from doing something you'll regret.
Darien: You think I'll regret shooting this piece of trash?
Hobbes: Fawkes, you'd regret stepping on an ant.
Darien: That's right. Fawkes would, I wouldn't.
Hobbes: Look, just give me the gun and I'll shoot him myself.
Darien: No you won't. I'm not stupid, Hobbes.
Hobbes: Fawkes, we're getting nowhere here, we're going around in circles.
Darien: That's right. So get out of my way.
Hobbes: No. I can make this guy stop what he's doing. But not if he's dead.
Darien: What are you gonna do? Make him promise he won't do it again?
Hobbes: Ahh, forget this.
*Hobbes turns to the terrorist.*
Hobbes: Tell your men to put down their guns or I'll let my buddy here blow your brains out.
Terrorist leader: No.
*Hobbes steps out of the way.*
Hobbes: Okay Fawkes, do your thing.
Terrorist leader: Wait! All right. (turns to his men) Put down your guns.
*The terrorists put down their guns. Hobbes turns toward Darien.*
Hobbes: See, now was that so bad?
*The terrorist leader grabs Hobbes and starts choking him. Darien knocks the terrorist off and beings choking him. Hobbes pulls out the needle of counteragent and stabs it into the back of Darien's neck. Darien cries out in pain and falls onto the ground. Darien drops Hobbes' gun. Hobbes picks it up and aims it at the terrorist leader.*
Hobbes: You wanna try that again?
**********
The Official's office, THE NEXT DAY. Darien, Hobbes, Claire, Alex, the Official, and Eberts are all gathered together again.
Official: First off, I would like to congratulate you all on a job well done. BUT... it could have been done better.
Darien: Hey, we did the best with what we had.
Hobbes: Yeah, I think we did pretty good back there.
Claire: I thought we did rather well. Considering the situation.
Alex: Sir, with all due respect, I don't care squat about what you think. In my opinion, we all did pretty good.
Darien: (glances at Alex) You go girl. You know, it might have helped if we had some kind of back up.
Official: You four were all I could spare.
Darien: Either that or you're too cheap.
Official: You know, I can deduct comments like that from your salary.
Darien: Man, that is not fair! We could've gotten killed in that place!
Official: Like I said, you four were all I could spare, and I couldn't get any of the other government agencies to back you up. So I made a gamble. Obviously I gambled right.
Claire: I think he's right. You and Hobbes handled the situation, didn't you?
Hobbes: Yeah, we handled it.
Darien: Yeah, we did. In fact, I think we deserve a raise.
Official: Well, unfortunately, between our previous debts and all the damage you two caused to the school cafeteria, I'm afraid there isn't much left to go around. No raises today, boys.
Hobbes: I knew it! I knew it!
Darien: How do ya like that?
Hobbes: Typical. Next thing you know, they're going to be taking the money to fix that cafeteria up out of our pay.
Darien: We save the kids, almost get killed in the process, and this is what we get.
Eberts: Should I dock their pays, sir?
Official: Feel free, Eberts.
*Hobbes groans.*
Eberts: I'll take care of that immediately, sir.
Darien: Oh come on, you're not serious are you?
Official: No. I'm not. Eberts, come back here.
*Eberts frowns.*
Official: You can dock their pay later. First, bring in the mail.
Eberts: (smiles) Yes sir.
Darien: That's it, I'm not going to sit here and listen to this.
Hobbes: Me neither. Let's go buy a burger. If we can afford to, that is.
Darien: If you can afford to, you mean.
Alex: If I can afford to, you mean. Claire, come on. We're all going out for burgers, my treat. Screw the Official.
Hobbes: All right, Alex!
*The Official frowns.*
Darien: Have I ever told you how cool you are, Alex?
Alex: (smiles) See, I'm not all bad.
*Darien, Hobbes, Claire, and Alex walk out of the room. Eberts comes back in with an armload of mail.*
Official: Hmm, a bit more than usual, wouldn't you say?
Eberts: Yes, sir. Here you are, sir.
*Eberts lays the mail on the official's desk. The Official opens an envelope.*
Official: Here's the check for the reward money. What've you got, Eberts?
Eberts: They appear to be thank you cards, sir.
Official: Thank you cards?
Eberts: Yes. They look like they were made by children.
*A slow smile crosses the Official's face.*
Official: Eberts, you wanna go grab a burger?
~The End~
Authors: liz_Z and Invision
Rating: PG-13
Summary: "The Gang" is sent out to save some kidnapped children.
Spoilers: Nope
Disclaimer: We don't own "The Invisible Man" or any of the characters. We are not making any money off of this.
Note: I think liz_Z needs a round of applause 'cause she edited this baby all by herself.
Darien, Claire, and Eberts played by: Invision
Hobbes, Alex, and the Official played by: liz_Z
Everyone else played by: Umm, I don't remember, I lost track. Either Invision or liz_Z. Does it really matter which? Now on to the story...
___________________________
The Official's office, DAY. Darien, Hobbes, Claire, and Alex are there, as well as the Official and Eberts.
Official: Well everyone, I'm sure you're wondering why I called you into my office.
Darien: The thought had crossed my mind.
Official: I've got a mission for you.
Hobbes (sarcastically): No kidding.
Official: A very special mission. One that requires all of you.
Alex: Oh, great. I take it I'm paying my way again?
Eberts: Our budget is not large enough to support your fees, Agent Monroe.
Alex: (rolls her eyes) Of course not. Your budget can't even support the fees for a new copying machine.
Darien: She's got a point there, Eberts.
Hobbes: Yeah, and I'm very overdue for a raise...
*The Official glares at Hobbes.*
Darien: Hobbes, you're never gonna get that raise, haven't you figured that out by now?
Hobbes: Hey, a guy can dream, can't he?
Darien: Yeah, that's about all you can do around here.
*The Official glances over at Claire.*
Official: Do you have that extra counteragent synthesized?
Claire: Yes, it's ready and waiting.
Official: All right, then. (clears his throat) This mission is of the utmost importance.
Hobbes: Umm, sir?
Official: Yes, Hobbes?
Hobbes: What is the mission?
Darien: Good question, Hobbes.
Official: I was just getting to that, now would you shut up and let me speak?
Darien: Yes, please continue.
Official: A group of terrorists are holding some children hostage.
Hobbes: That's it?
Official: These are the children of some very influential families.
Darien: We have to rescue some children?
Official: Yes. But, as I said before, these are not just any children. They are all the children of bureaucrats and millionaires. A large sum of money has been offered if we can release them.
Darien: Really? Where's that money going to go?
Official: To the Agency, if we're the group that manages to stop the terrorists.
Hobbes: So basically, we're never going to see it again.
Darien: You wouldn't want to use it for, oh, say gland research? Or maybe you could finally give Hobbes a raise?
Official: Well, we have some... debts... to pay off first, but after that, we'll see.
Hobbes: (groans) Oh, here we go again...
Darien: Well Alex, I guess that means no new copy machine.
Alex: Exactly what are we going to do on this mission? I assume from what you said to Claire that it involves a lot of invisibility.
Official: Darien is going to smuggle you and Hobbes into the complex, and then the three of you are going to rescue those children.
Darien: (glances at Hobbes and Alex) Gee, this should be fun.
Hobbes: Hey, is Claire coming too?
Official: Yes.
Hobbes: She's gonna stay in the van then, right?
Official: No.
Claire; Why should I, Bobby?
Hobbes: Oh, no reason, just wondering... Just looking out for my colleague's safety, that's all.
Darien: Aw, how sweet. Hobbesy is worried about you, Claire.
*Hobbes glares at Darien.*
Claire: (rolls her eyes) Darien, please.
Darien: What? I'm just saying that's nice.
Alex: So, is Claire going into the building?
Official: Of course. She needs to administer Fawkes' counteragent.
Claire: There's no telling when and where Darien might need a shot.
Official: That's why I had you make some extra counteragent.
Darien: I'm not going to have to quicksilver these children am I?
Official: I doubt it. Your main objective once you get inside the building is to take out the terrorists.
Darien: But there's a chance I may have to, right? Do we have enough of the blue stuff for that?
Official: Not enough to rescue all of the children. At least, not without you going insane.
Darien: We don't have the time to make some more just in case?
Official: The terrorists have issued a twelve-hour deadline for their demands to be met. Then they start killing children. Unfortunately, the place that the children are being held is approximately ten hours away.
Darien: So I guess we need to get started.
Official: Exactly. Considering the circumstances, you're lucky we have as much counteragent as we do. Now, get out there and save those kids.
**********
The van, AFTERNOON. Hobbes is driving, Darien is sitting in the passenger's seat, and Alex and Claire are situated in the back.
Darien: So how much longer do we have?
Hobbes: About six hours. Now shush.
Darien: Well I was just asking.
Hobbes: Well, stop asking, okay? That's the third time in the last twenty minutes you've asked me that.
Darien: Well...
Claire: Would you two quit acting like children?
Hobbes: Aw, come on Claire, give me a break, will ya? He's getting on my nerves!
Alex: And you're both getting on my nerves.
Darien: Claire, would you tell him to shut up? He'll listen to you.
Claire: Both of you need to be quiet.
Alex: Yes. So both of you just shut up.
*Everyone glares at Alex.*
Darien: Someone woke up on the wrong side of the coffin this morning.
*Hobbes snickers.*
Alex: Excuse me?
Darien: You heard me. Maybe you should try decaff.
Alex: I don't drink coffee.
Hobbes: Of course not. You're too busy drinking those grass shakes.
Darien: Those incredibly gross grass shakes.
Hobbes: Yeah, with a little weed-killer on the side.
Alex: If you two don't shut up, then so help me I'll...
Darien: Oh, we're scared Alex.
Hobbes: Yeah, what're you gonna do, force-feed us grass shakes 'till we burst?
*Alex mutters angrily to herself.*
Claire: Why don't you guys just cool it, all right?
Hobbes: Aw, come on Claire, we were just starting to have fun!
Darien: Yeah, Claire. You really need a sense of humor.
Hobbes: (yawns) Hey, does anyone else want to drive? I'm getting kind of tired.
Darien: I don't think we should let Alex drive. I see a case of road rage in her future.
*Alex glares icily at Darien.*
Claire: Relax, I will drive.
Hobbes: Good. If Darien had volunteered, I don't think we would've lived long enough to try and catch those terrorists.
Darien: Watch yourself, Hobbes. Your driving isn't all that hot either.
Hobbes: (as he pulls over to the side of the road) Well, I haven't had an accident yet, have I?
Darien: Well neither have I.
Hobbes: That's because I never let you drive, my friend.
*Darien opens his mouth to speak.*
Claire: I'll settle this, you both can't drive. Happy?
Hobbes: No! I can drive very well, thank you very much.
Alex: Said the man as he crashed into a nearby stump.
Darien: Hey, that was pretty good Alex.
Alex: (smirks) Thank you.
Hobbes: There may be hope for you yet.
Alex: Okay, now you're pushing it.
Darien: Yeah, we wouldn't want to start liking her, now would we Hobbes?
Claire: If you keep arguing, we're never going to get there.
Hobbes: Yeah, we've already wasted ten minutes arguing like this. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to move to the back seat.
**********
The van, NIGHT. Claire pulls to a stop outside a large group of buildings. Alex is sitting in the passenger seat, Darien and Hobbes are in the back. Both are asleep.
Claire: Wake up everyone. We're here.
*Hobbes snores. Darien snores even louder. Alex pushes Hobbes' and Darien's arms.*
Alex: Wake up, you big oafs.
Darien: Garfugle...
Hobbes: 'M awake...
Alex: Come on you two, we're there!
Darien: Just five more minutes mommy.
Hobbes: Huh? We're there already?
*Alex rolls her eyes.*
Claire: There's the building, so we must be there.
Hobbes: Eew! Fawkes, get off me!
*He looks over at Alex and Claire.*
Hobbes: Hey guys, get him off me, will ya? He's drooling on me!
*Claire laughs.*
Darien: Wha? Are we there yet?
Hobbes: Yes, now get off me! You're drooling all over my shirt!
*Alex snickers.*
Claire: Actually you were, Darien.
Hobbes: Yeah, so get off me before you ruin my pants too!
Darien: Sorry Hobbsey.
Hobbes: And I liked this shirt, too...
Alex: Come on guys, we've got a job to do.
Darien: You can wash it, Hobbes. It's not like I have cooties.
Alex: Hello? Remember the kids? We've only got... (glances at her watch) ...An hour and a half left before the trouble starts.
Claire: Alex is right. Come along, children. You're wasting valuable time.
Hobbes: I am not a child!
Darien: Hobbes was the one making the big deal.
Hobbes: Well, it's one of my favorite shirts!
Alex: Oh, don't start that again. Let's go.
*Everyone walks toward the building.*
Darien: (whistles) This is a big place.
Hobbes: Well, it's a boarding school. It needs to be big.
Alex: So, who goes in with Darien first?
Claire: I guess I'll go in first.
Hobbes: You sure about that? I mean, it's probably gonna be real dangerous in there, and...
Claire: I can take care of myself, Bobby.
Hobbes: I know that, I'm just saying... I dunno, shouldn't I go first?
Claire: If you want to, Bobby. I was just offering to go in first.
Hobbes: Okay then, I'll go first.
Alex: And then me.
Darien: That would make Claire last. Is everyone okay with that?
Hobbes: Yeah.
Alex: Yeah.
Claire: That's fine with me.
Darien: All right then.
*Darien quicksilvers himself, and Hobbes. They enter the building.*
Hobbes: Okay, I can take it from here. Go back out for Alex.
*Darien leaves Hobbes and walks back outside.*
Darien: You're up, Alex.
Alex: Okay.
*Darien quicksilvers Alex.*
Alex: Wow, that is so... never mind. Let's go.
Darien: Impressed?
Alex: Well, maybe a little.
Darien: Just a little?
Alex: Hey, coming from me that's a compliment.
Darien: No argument here.
*Darien and Alex go into the building. Darien finds Hobbes and de-quicksilvers.*
Hobbes: Hey, give me a little warning before you do that!
Darien: Please. Okay, I'm off to get the last one.
Hobbes: Keep her safe, partner.
Darien: No need to worry, Bobby.
Hobbes: That's what worries me.
*Darien waves as he quicksilvers. Darien de-quicksilvers outside.*
Darien: You ready Claire?
Claire: As I'll ever be.
*Darien quicksilvers Claire.*
Claire: Wow!
*Darien and Claire make their way over to Hobbes and Alex. Darien and Claire de-quicksilver. Hobbes jumps.*
Hobbes: Fawkes, what did I tell you about that?
Darien: Come on, Hobbes. Quit being so jumpy.
Hobbes: It's my job. Now, let's get going.
Darien: Uh, Claire. I need a little shot.
*Darien shows Claire his tattoo, which only has two segments left.*
Claire: I'd say you do.
*Claire gives Darien his shot. All the segments return to green.*
Alex: Okay, let's go. I think I hear something in the next room.
*Everyone walks into the next room. Two children are inside, guarded by two terrorists with BIG guns.*
Darien: Aw crap...
*Hobbes and Alex draw their guns.*
Hobbes: Freeze!
Alex: On the ground! Now!
*The terrorists just laugh and aim their guns at Hobbes and Alex.*
Darien: Aw crap.
Hobbes: Aw crap is right!
Claire: I think we better run...
Alex: So run already!
*Everyone runs back out the door and ducks into the hall. The terrorists shoot their machine guns through the doorway.*
Darien: So now what?
Hobbes: Why're you asking me? I'm making this up as I go!
Darien: Well, Alex? You're the five-star agent.
Alex: Well, you could go invisible and run in there and knock those terrorists out as soon as they stop shooting.
Darien: Yeah, I do all the work as usual.
Alex: Well, it's better than being turned into Swiss cheese, isn't it?
Darien: Yeah, let's just hope they don't have more guns. Then I'll be invisible Swiss cheese.
*The terrorists stop shooting so they can reload their guns.*
Hobbes: Now's your chance, partner!
Darien: Here goes...
*Darien goes invisible and runs into the room.*
Darien: Hey guys.
*The evil guys look up.*
Darien: No, over here.
*Darien knocks the two men out.*
1st kid: Auggh!
2nd kid: What the...
1st kid: I KNEW there were invisible monsters in here!
2nd kid: That's not possible you dummy!
Hobbes: Fawkes, what's going on? What's taking you so long?
Darien: These kids are fighting.
1st kid: I want my mommy!
2nd kid: You baby!
Darien: What should I do?
Alex: Get them out of there before the terrorists wake up!
*The two children are lifted by an unseen force.*
1st kid: WAAAAHHHHH!!!!
2nd kid: Hey! We're floating!
*Darien de-quicksilvers.*
Hobbes: Come on, let's get outta here!
Darien: How many of these kids do we have to find?
Alex: Umm... about thirty all together, I think.
Darien: Thirty? That's a lot of little kids to be dealing with.
Hobbes: And they won't all fit in the van, that's for sure.
Darien: Is anybody here good with kids?
Alex: I'm good, but I'm not that good.
Darien: Uh, how 'bout you Claire?
Hobbes: Yeah, how about you?
Claire: Well, I'm okay with kids. I guess. What about you, Bobby?
Hobbes: Well, I'm always willing to try something new.
Darien: Please. Hobbes good with kids?
Hobbes: Hey, I said I'm willing to try. I didn't say I'll succeed.
1st kid: *sniffles* I want my mommy...
2nd kid: Quit crying you big baby! Hey mister, how did you do that?
Hobbes: It's need to know.
Darien: (at the same time) Magic.
Hobbes: That too.
Claire: Look, we need to find these other children fast.
Hobbes: Okay, I've got a plan. Claire, you and Alex go outside and watch the kids, while Darien and me try to smuggle more of 'em out.
Darien: Yeah, that sounds like a plan.
Alex: How come I have to help watch the kids?
Hobbes: 'Cause I thought of the plan.
Darien: Yeah, and 'cause me and Hobbes work better alone.
Alex: I think you guys forgot something...
*She points at the two terrorists lying unconscious on the floor.*
Darien: Yeah. So you and Claire better take these kids out to the van.
Hobbes: We'll take care of these guys.
Claire: What if you need a shot?
Hobbes: I can give him his shots if you'll just give me the blue stuff.
Claire: You sure? I didn't think you liked needles.
Hobbes: I hate 'em. But I don't exactly want Fawkesy here going wacko on me either.
Claire: All right. Here you go. Be careful with it. It's all we have.
Hobbes: Hey, careful is my middle name.
Darien: Yeah right. Ok, you two better get going.
*Alex picks up the 1st kid. Claire picks up the 2nd kid. The two of them walk out of the room.*
Darien: Okay, let's find these other kids. They could be anywhere in this place.
Hobbes: Yeah, but first we need to tie these guys up.
*He points to the unconscious terrorists.*
Darien: That's a good idea. You see any rope?
Hobbes: No, but there's some telephone cord running along the wall over there.
*Hobbes and Darien tie up the mean terrorists with the telephone cord.*
Darien: Problem solved. Let's find these kids.
Hobbes: Here. (hands Darien his gun) You might need this.
Darien: I don't need a gun, Hobbes.
*Hobbes picks up one of the terrorist's machine guns.*
Hobbes: Maybe not, but I wanna try out one of these babies.
*Hobbes grabs several machine gun clips off of the unconscious guards.*
Darien: Yeah, you just be careful who you're pointing that thing at.
Hobbes: Don't worry. (prepares the gun to fire) I'll be real careful.
Darien: Gee, I have no worries. Bobby Hobbes: Rambo of the Agency.
Hobbes: And proud of it, my friend. Now let's get those kids out of here before the other terrorists find out we're here.
*Darien and Hobbes continue to search the building.
They duck into a doorway as two terrorists walk down the hall.*
First terrorist: So have you seen the new episode of Maury Povich yet?
*Hobbes slams the butt of his gun down on the back of the first terrorist's head.*
Second terrorist: What the-
*Hobbes slams the second terrorist's head into the nearest wall.*
Darien: Good one, Bobby.
Hobbes: I'd like to see you pull off something like that.
Darien: Oh I could.
Hobbes: Sure you could, Fawkes...
Darien: I could, I was just letting you have some fun.
*Darien and Hobbes drag the terrorists into a nearby room and tie them up.*
Darien: How much time do we have left?
Hobbes: (checks his watch) About an hour. We've got to work fast.
Darien: If you were a terrorist, where would you put a bunch of kids?
Hobbes: I'd go for the mess hall.
Darien: That's what I'm thinking.
Hobbes: I knew I should've asked the Official for a map of this place...
Darien: I guess they wouldn't have brochures anywhere would they?
Hobbes: Shh. I think I hear something.
Darien: I don't hear anything.
Hobbes: You don't hear that little crying noise? I think I hear a crying noise.
Darien: No, I didn't hear that little crying noise.
Hobbes: Come on, follow me.
*Darien and Hobbes round a corner in the hall and come face to face with two terrorists guarding a bathroom.*
Darien: Aw crap...
Hobbes: Oops.
*Hobbes lifts the machine gun and shoots the terrorists.*
Darien: I guess we know what your 'crying noise' was.
*The sounds of a child crying start to float out of the bathroom.*
Hobbes: Yeah, I guess we do.
*Hobbes opens the bathroom door. A kid, David, is standing near the sink, looking fearfully at the blood pooling on the floor.*
Darien: Hey, buddy. We're here to help you, all right?
David: Okay...
Hobbes: Are there any other kids in the building with you?
David: Yeah, lots of kids. They're all down in the cafeteria...
Darien: Looks like you were right, Hobbes.
Hobbes: Can you show us where that is?
*David nods.*
Darien: Are there any bad guys with them?
David: Yeah. Lots of bad guys. With big guns and stuff.
Hobbes: Well, that's just great.
Darien: What are we gonna do with this one? We can't take him in there with us.
Hobbes: Umm... I'm thinking, don't rush me. (pauses for a second) Okay, here's what we do. We have the kid show us where the cafeteria is, and then we can hide him in a laundry bin or something.
Darien: Great plan.
Hobbes: Hey, I'm making this up as I go, okay?
Darien: Okay, we better think of how we're gonna handle those guys in the cafeteria. We can't just go in there and start shooting.
Hobbes: That part's easy. You go see-through and sneak into the room. Figure out how many guys there are, then we'll think of something else.
Darien: All right, we better get going.
Hobbes: Yeah. Hey kid, which way do we go?
*David grabs Darien's hand.*
David: Follow me.
Darien: Lead the way, buddy.
*David leads them down several corridors, finally stopping in front of a big set of double-doors.*
David: That's the cafeteria.
Darien: Ok, we better find some place to hide you.
Hobbes: Hey, how about that room over there?
*He points toward a small office.*
Darien: That looks good.
Hobbes: Okay, you go see-through and I'll hide the kid here.
Darien: Here goes...
*Darien quicksilvers and enters the cafeteria. He stares, shocked, at the scene.*
Darien: (thinking) Aw crap... There must be 20 or 25 guys in here. How in the world are we gonna do this?
*Darien exits the cafeteria and de-quicksilvers in front of Hobbes.*
Hobbes: I hid the kid. He should be okay.
Darien: There are tons of terrorist guys in there, Hobbes. About 20 of 'em.
Hobbes: Oh great. Just what we need...
Darien: How in the world are we gonna do this?
Hobbes: Okay, here's the deal. You go cellophane and quicksilver me too. We knock out as many of those creeps as we can before I reappear. After that... well, after that it gets messy.
Darien: Yeah, we're gonna have to make it quick though.
Hobbes: Yeah. We don't have much time left.
Darien: You ready?
Hobbes: (takes a deep breath, then holds out his hand) Okay, do me.
*Darien quicksilvers Hobbes and himself. They walk into the cafeteria.*
Darien: I'll take the left half, you take the right?
Hobbes: Sure.
*Hobbes smacks a terrorist on the back of the head with the butt of his machine gun. Darien smashes a terrorist into the wall. The other terrorists watch with confusion on their faces.*
Terrorist leader: We're being attacked!
Terrorist # 2: By who? I can't see anyone.
Terrorist # 3: It's ghosts!
*Darien knocks out Terrorist #2.*
Terrorist # 4: This place is haunted!
*Hobbes has just knocked out two terrorists when he suddenly reappears.*
Hobbes: Aw crap!
Terrorist leader: (points at Hobbes) Shoot him!
*Hobbes pushes over a nearby table and ducks behind it. The children scream and duck under tables as the terrorists start to open fire in Hobbes' direction. Hobbes returns fire. Darien knocks out a terrorist and then glances at his wrist.*
Darien: Aw crap.
Hobbes: Fawkes, you'd better take cover unless you want to be Swiss cheese!
*Darien runs over and ducks behind the table with Hobbes, reappearing.*
Darien: Hobbes, we have a little problem.
*Hobbes fires off a couple rounds at the terrorists and then looks back at Darien.*
Hobbes: What?
Darien: I need a ahhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!
Hobbes: (looks over at Darien) Fawkes, you okay? You get shot or something?
*Darien looks up at Hobbes with blood red eyes.*
Darien: Oh I'm fine, Robert.
Hobbes: Aw CRAP!
Darien: Everything's okay. I'm just tired of these guys shooting at us.
*Darien quicksilvers.*
Hobbes: Fawkes, get back here!
*Hobbes feels where Darien was a moment ago, but Darien is gone.*
Darien: I'm going to take care of this, Robert.
*Darien smacks two terrorists' heads together. Hobbes tries to fire his gun, but nothing happens.*
Hobbes: Oh great, out of bullets. (yelling) Fawkes, what did you do with my gun?
*Darien sneaks up behind Terrorist #4.*
Darien: Hello, Mr. Terrorist.
*Darien hits the man on the head with Hobbes' gun. Suddenly the terrorist leader places his gun against Hobbes' head.*
Terrorist leader: Hello there.
*Darien knocks out three more guys.*
Hobbes: Hi. I'd suggest you get your men to surrender right now.
Terrorist leader: And I'd suggest you get your invisible friend to stop playing ghost or I'll blow your brains out.
Darien: That wouldn't be very nice.
Terrorist leader: Nice isn't in the job description. Now, if you would be so kind as to show yourself...
Darien: Okay.
*Darien de-quicksilvers the gun.
Hobbes ducks, pushing the terrorist leader's gun barrel away from his head.
Darien fires at the terrorist. The bullet hits the terrorist in the shoulder. The terrorist leader cries out in pain, Hobbes takes the opportunity to trip him.*
Darien: Time to die Mr. Bad Guy.
Hobbes: Wait! I can handle it from here.
Darien: I don't think so, Robert.
Hobbes: You don't want to kill this guy, Fawkes. You know that.
Darien: Do I?
Hobbes: Nah, you probably don't. But you will. Just trust me here, all right partner? We're here for the kids, remember?
*A nearby child whimpers*.
Darien: I know. This guy is responsible for them being here, right? Why shouldn't I put him out of our misery?
Hobbes: 'Cause then all his little terrorist buddies are gonna blow our brains out. And no offense, but I don't want to die just yet.
Darien: Bobby Hobbes, afraid of death?
Hobbes: Hey, I'm not afraid of anything. I'd just prefer to live a little longer. Come on, you don't want to die this way, do you?
Darien: We're all going to die eventually anyway. Might as well take someone with us.
*Darien aims the gun at the terrorist leader. Hobbes jumps in the way.*
Darien: Robert, what are you doing?
Hobbes: Trying to keep you from doing something you'll regret.
Darien: You think I'll regret shooting this piece of trash?
Hobbes: Fawkes, you'd regret stepping on an ant.
Darien: That's right. Fawkes would, I wouldn't.
Hobbes: Look, just give me the gun and I'll shoot him myself.
Darien: No you won't. I'm not stupid, Hobbes.
Hobbes: Fawkes, we're getting nowhere here, we're going around in circles.
Darien: That's right. So get out of my way.
Hobbes: No. I can make this guy stop what he's doing. But not if he's dead.
Darien: What are you gonna do? Make him promise he won't do it again?
Hobbes: Ahh, forget this.
*Hobbes turns to the terrorist.*
Hobbes: Tell your men to put down their guns or I'll let my buddy here blow your brains out.
Terrorist leader: No.
*Hobbes steps out of the way.*
Hobbes: Okay Fawkes, do your thing.
Terrorist leader: Wait! All right. (turns to his men) Put down your guns.
*The terrorists put down their guns. Hobbes turns toward Darien.*
Hobbes: See, now was that so bad?
*The terrorist leader grabs Hobbes and starts choking him. Darien knocks the terrorist off and beings choking him. Hobbes pulls out the needle of counteragent and stabs it into the back of Darien's neck. Darien cries out in pain and falls onto the ground. Darien drops Hobbes' gun. Hobbes picks it up and aims it at the terrorist leader.*
Hobbes: You wanna try that again?
**********
The Official's office, THE NEXT DAY. Darien, Hobbes, Claire, Alex, the Official, and Eberts are all gathered together again.
Official: First off, I would like to congratulate you all on a job well done. BUT... it could have been done better.
Darien: Hey, we did the best with what we had.
Hobbes: Yeah, I think we did pretty good back there.
Claire: I thought we did rather well. Considering the situation.
Alex: Sir, with all due respect, I don't care squat about what you think. In my opinion, we all did pretty good.
Darien: (glances at Alex) You go girl. You know, it might have helped if we had some kind of back up.
Official: You four were all I could spare.
Darien: Either that or you're too cheap.
Official: You know, I can deduct comments like that from your salary.
Darien: Man, that is not fair! We could've gotten killed in that place!
Official: Like I said, you four were all I could spare, and I couldn't get any of the other government agencies to back you up. So I made a gamble. Obviously I gambled right.
Claire: I think he's right. You and Hobbes handled the situation, didn't you?
Hobbes: Yeah, we handled it.
Darien: Yeah, we did. In fact, I think we deserve a raise.
Official: Well, unfortunately, between our previous debts and all the damage you two caused to the school cafeteria, I'm afraid there isn't much left to go around. No raises today, boys.
Hobbes: I knew it! I knew it!
Darien: How do ya like that?
Hobbes: Typical. Next thing you know, they're going to be taking the money to fix that cafeteria up out of our pay.
Darien: We save the kids, almost get killed in the process, and this is what we get.
Eberts: Should I dock their pays, sir?
Official: Feel free, Eberts.
*Hobbes groans.*
Eberts: I'll take care of that immediately, sir.
Darien: Oh come on, you're not serious are you?
Official: No. I'm not. Eberts, come back here.
*Eberts frowns.*
Official: You can dock their pay later. First, bring in the mail.
Eberts: (smiles) Yes sir.
Darien: That's it, I'm not going to sit here and listen to this.
Hobbes: Me neither. Let's go buy a burger. If we can afford to, that is.
Darien: If you can afford to, you mean.
Alex: If I can afford to, you mean. Claire, come on. We're all going out for burgers, my treat. Screw the Official.
Hobbes: All right, Alex!
*The Official frowns.*
Darien: Have I ever told you how cool you are, Alex?
Alex: (smiles) See, I'm not all bad.
*Darien, Hobbes, Claire, and Alex walk out of the room. Eberts comes back in with an armload of mail.*
Official: Hmm, a bit more than usual, wouldn't you say?
Eberts: Yes, sir. Here you are, sir.
*Eberts lays the mail on the official's desk. The Official opens an envelope.*
Official: Here's the check for the reward money. What've you got, Eberts?
Eberts: They appear to be thank you cards, sir.
Official: Thank you cards?
Eberts: Yes. They look like they were made by children.
*A slow smile crosses the Official's face.*
Official: Eberts, you wanna go grab a burger?
~The End~