Chapter 2 : No need for an explanatin
Teacher's lounge, 1345 hours,
"Okay comrades, attention! We have exatly 1 hour and 15 minutes before the health class starts
and we need to figure out whose teaching health. Since Treize still hasn't shown up- "
"Hes DEAD Colonel Une!" said Zechs in a flat montone. He then elaborated on how the cardboard cut-out was not able to make it off the stage and that the real Treize had gone to the big auditourium in the sky.
"No, Mister Treize-sama cannot be dead!"
"*sigh* He died 2 and a half years ago. Wufei killed him. Get that through your head!" said Noin.
" SHUT UP!! You two will be teaching SexEd !!" snapped Colonel Une.
"Why ME!!" yelled Zechs. "Why the heck should I tech about sex!"
"Because your name rhymes with it. Now Go. And I dont like you Noin." said Colonel Une with an evil sadistic grin. Zechs and Noin slunk out of the teacher's lounge muttering " . . . bitch . ."
"WHAT DID YOU SAY???!!!""
"Nothing! Nothing!"
1500 hours
"That last class was useless. I had to wast half an hour of class trying to convince Dorothy that Treize will never come"
"And that demented onna wouldn't get off my back! Something about getting revenge cuz i killed Treize. Injustice!"
" She tried to stab me with her pen! Im still aching over that LAST time she impaled me! When I said that she was a nice teacher deep inside, she treatened to turn me into a Pacifist shish-kabob" teared Quatre.
" . . . ."
"Hey! Lookie what we have here! Zechs and Noin teaching sex ed! This SHOULD be interesting!"
I think that you can figure out who said what.
Right then, two very depressed people stepped into the classroom. Zechs was wearing his trenchcoat and looking very ticked. Noin was wearing her civilian clothes and also a trenchcoat and was equally ticked.
"Okay class. Ms. Noin and I will be teaching you about sex. Pay attention or I'll shoot you"
All of the class fell silent. Well, except for the GBoys, who sniggered remembering the old times.
"Um, as Mr. Zechs just said, we'll um be teaching you about sex and_all_that_lovely_stuff . . . "
Quatre had a very confused look on his cute puppy dog face. Mr. Zechs began talking
"Im assuming that you all know about compulation, so lets skip over to prot- huh, a question?"
Quatre sheepishly raised his hand. He started his question slowly and gave his puppy dog eyes.
"Um, Mr.Zechs, Ms.Noin, I don't really understand. "
"What is there to understand?!" Zechs asked, fear building inside of him.
"what, um, exaclty, IS sex?"
Everybody in the class sweatdropped. Wufei muttered something about women(I think), Heero actually managed to look suprised and grunted in amazement, Trowa was trying to hold in laughter but said nothing, and Duo was falling off his chair from giggling insanely. The rest of the class followed Duo's suit to some extent. Zechs was cradling his head in his hands saying " why me" and rubbing his temples, and Noin was doing the same thing except she was saying something more along the lines of "oh dear kami-san". Which translates to "Oh dear God".
"Um, I see that we have to start from the very beginning" growled Zechs. "Oh boy"
Duo eagerly took out an audio recorder. Zechs took one look at the blasted thing and sighed.
"Um, exactly how much DO you know, Quatre?" asked Noin. "Have you ever heard the word sex before ever?!"
"Um . .. no" said a very confused Quatre. Heero look amused. So, his rival would be explaining the idea of, well, you know, to Quatre. Interesting. He was certainly grateful that Relena wasn't in his class.
"Hmn, okay." said Zechs as he thought of an idea. His eyes flashed across the room as he searched for something to use. When he found nothing that could be of aid to him, he thoguht some more. What if . . .Aha!
"I'll be back in a minute!" He ran out of the room and came back with something from Ms. Catalonia's homeroom.
"Voodoo dolls?" said Duo. " Okay Mr. Zechs, now youve really lost it"
"Yes, they are voodoo dolls, and no, I have not really lost it" said Zechs as he gave a couple of dolls to Noin. " Now Quatre, when two people meet . . ."
Then Duo said, "Hey mister! We wanted to learn about sex, not how you two met!"
"Hey! Shut up! Just be glad Dorothy isn't teaching this class!"
"Injustice!"
"If you two are so damn smart, then why don't YOU teach the class!"
'Whaat?! I do not want to be teaching alongside this braided baka-ish onna weakling american person!!!!"
Lady Une's voice sounded over the intercom "Class! Due to excessive snow storms, class will be dissmissed early today!!"
Zechs and Noin loooked eternally grateful
"That was the one time I was glad to hear Hitler's voice . . ." said Noin.
"Tell me about it".
Duo started skipping out of the room and toward the dorm. "Wahoooo!!! We. Are. FREE!!"
"I can finally get to work on my gundam" said Heero, referring to his model kit.
Wufei was just glad that he din't have to talk about sex. Quatre was still confused. Trowa said nothing. And Dorothy had started hugging the cardboard cut-out of her cousin. Nobody noticed Duo messing around with Zech's breifcase. . . .
Teacher's lounge, 1345 hours,
"Okay comrades, attention! We have exatly 1 hour and 15 minutes before the health class starts
and we need to figure out whose teaching health. Since Treize still hasn't shown up- "
"Hes DEAD Colonel Une!" said Zechs in a flat montone. He then elaborated on how the cardboard cut-out was not able to make it off the stage and that the real Treize had gone to the big auditourium in the sky.
"No, Mister Treize-sama cannot be dead!"
"*sigh* He died 2 and a half years ago. Wufei killed him. Get that through your head!" said Noin.
" SHUT UP!! You two will be teaching SexEd !!" snapped Colonel Une.
"Why ME!!" yelled Zechs. "Why the heck should I tech about sex!"
"Because your name rhymes with it. Now Go. And I dont like you Noin." said Colonel Une with an evil sadistic grin. Zechs and Noin slunk out of the teacher's lounge muttering " . . . bitch . ."
"WHAT DID YOU SAY???!!!""
"Nothing! Nothing!"
1500 hours
"That last class was useless. I had to wast half an hour of class trying to convince Dorothy that Treize will never come"
"And that demented onna wouldn't get off my back! Something about getting revenge cuz i killed Treize. Injustice!"
" She tried to stab me with her pen! Im still aching over that LAST time she impaled me! When I said that she was a nice teacher deep inside, she treatened to turn me into a Pacifist shish-kabob" teared Quatre.
" . . . ."
"Hey! Lookie what we have here! Zechs and Noin teaching sex ed! This SHOULD be interesting!"
I think that you can figure out who said what.
Right then, two very depressed people stepped into the classroom. Zechs was wearing his trenchcoat and looking very ticked. Noin was wearing her civilian clothes and also a trenchcoat and was equally ticked.
"Okay class. Ms. Noin and I will be teaching you about sex. Pay attention or I'll shoot you"
All of the class fell silent. Well, except for the GBoys, who sniggered remembering the old times.
"Um, as Mr. Zechs just said, we'll um be teaching you about sex and_all_that_lovely_stuff . . . "
Quatre had a very confused look on his cute puppy dog face. Mr. Zechs began talking
"Im assuming that you all know about compulation, so lets skip over to prot- huh, a question?"
Quatre sheepishly raised his hand. He started his question slowly and gave his puppy dog eyes.
"Um, Mr.Zechs, Ms.Noin, I don't really understand. "
"What is there to understand?!" Zechs asked, fear building inside of him.
"what, um, exaclty, IS sex?"
Everybody in the class sweatdropped. Wufei muttered something about women(I think), Heero actually managed to look suprised and grunted in amazement, Trowa was trying to hold in laughter but said nothing, and Duo was falling off his chair from giggling insanely. The rest of the class followed Duo's suit to some extent. Zechs was cradling his head in his hands saying " why me" and rubbing his temples, and Noin was doing the same thing except she was saying something more along the lines of "oh dear kami-san". Which translates to "Oh dear God".
"Um, I see that we have to start from the very beginning" growled Zechs. "Oh boy"
Duo eagerly took out an audio recorder. Zechs took one look at the blasted thing and sighed.
"Um, exactly how much DO you know, Quatre?" asked Noin. "Have you ever heard the word sex before ever?!"
"Um . .. no" said a very confused Quatre. Heero look amused. So, his rival would be explaining the idea of, well, you know, to Quatre. Interesting. He was certainly grateful that Relena wasn't in his class.
"Hmn, okay." said Zechs as he thought of an idea. His eyes flashed across the room as he searched for something to use. When he found nothing that could be of aid to him, he thoguht some more. What if . . .Aha!
"I'll be back in a minute!" He ran out of the room and came back with something from Ms. Catalonia's homeroom.
"Voodoo dolls?" said Duo. " Okay Mr. Zechs, now youve really lost it"
"Yes, they are voodoo dolls, and no, I have not really lost it" said Zechs as he gave a couple of dolls to Noin. " Now Quatre, when two people meet . . ."
Then Duo said, "Hey mister! We wanted to learn about sex, not how you two met!"
"Hey! Shut up! Just be glad Dorothy isn't teaching this class!"
"Injustice!"
"If you two are so damn smart, then why don't YOU teach the class!"
'Whaat?! I do not want to be teaching alongside this braided baka-ish onna weakling american person!!!!"
Lady Une's voice sounded over the intercom "Class! Due to excessive snow storms, class will be dissmissed early today!!"
Zechs and Noin loooked eternally grateful
"That was the one time I was glad to hear Hitler's voice . . ." said Noin.
"Tell me about it".
Duo started skipping out of the room and toward the dorm. "Wahoooo!!! We. Are. FREE!!"
"I can finally get to work on my gundam" said Heero, referring to his model kit.
Wufei was just glad that he din't have to talk about sex. Quatre was still confused. Trowa said nothing. And Dorothy had started hugging the cardboard cut-out of her cousin. Nobody noticed Duo messing around with Zech's breifcase. . . .