Part 5
The three entered the basically untouched Mansion, devastated. Buffy had fallen unconscious from all of her crying, and Spike was shocked at the love she had for Angel. He hadn't known it ran as deep as it did. She was so sad that he could *feel* it. He couldn't really imagine knowing that in 24 hours the love of his life would die, and there was nothing he could do about it.
Angel the whole way had tears running down his face as he looked at the broken girl that Spike carried. He wanted so badly to hold her himself, to whisper in her ear how much he loved her. But she couldn't handle that at the time, so he just looked at her. He sat down on the couch while Spike took Buffy into the bedroom to let her rest for a while. Angel was staring blankly at the empty fireplace a few feet in front of him when Spike returned. Spike swallowed hard and came to sit in the chair near his sire. "Angel..." he stated, with question in his voice. His voice was cold as ice, showing no emotion, "What do you want, Spike?"
He ran a finger through his ravaged bleach blonde hair, "She's not gonna make it without you..."
Angel snapped, "Don't you think I know that?! Don't you think that I wish it could just be over with?! So that I could spare her just a little bit of the pain?! So that I could spare myself?! I *can't*! I'm stuck here for the next 24 hours, knowing I'm going to die! Knowing that in 24 hours I'm going to lose her forever! The person that means the most to me, more than anyone I've ever met, and ever could! I'm just a dead man walking, even more so than before. And now instead of hoping, praying that when I die she'll be able to go on, I am almost certain she won't be able to. Because this time all of her friends are gone, too..."
Spike's heart ached seeing him this way, Angel was supposed to be strong, and here he was breaking down, snapping at the littlest thing. *I guess it wasn't a little thing, but he would have never done that before.*
Now Angel had had too much, he started sobbing, his head held in his hands. He couldn't control it anymore; he let himself fall apart. Spike opened his mouth to speak, but decided better of it. He moved to sit by him and put his hand on Angel's shuddering shoulder.
"I'd tell you it's gonna be okay... but it's not. I'm sorry... I really am, for you and Buffy." Angel never looked him in the eye, but he turned to him and hugged him tight. "Not many people will admit it to you, but you're a good friend," Angel said between sobs. Spike hugged him back, "Yeah, well everyone should admit it to you, 'cause you're the best guy I've ever met." "Thanks," they said in unison. "Just don't ever tell anyone I said that," Spike warned, seriously.
Angel choked back a cry and got out of their embrace. Spike saw that his face actually had a reddish tint to it, "Hey man, I didn't know vampires could do that." Angel looked at him quizzically, "What?" "Well your face is a little red," Spike told him. Angel raised his eyebrows, "I don't know, but I guess it's not everyday one of them starts bawling." They grinned at each other.
"I'm gonna go take a shower, figure I'll get one last one in," he said breaking the lightened mood, then standing up.
"Hey, maybe we'll find a loop-hole, there's always a loop-hole," Spike reminded him. "Yeah, well usually the people looking for them have more than 24 hours," Angel reminded *him*. "You have a point there, but it's worth a shot. I'm gonna go to Giles's old place a get as many books as I can carry," Spike informed him, heading for the door.
"Okay, see yah later," Angel started off in the opposite direction, to the master bathroom. Which, just happened to be off of the master bedroom. Which, just happened to be the bedroom that Spike had put her in.
Angel went into the room as quietly as he possibly could. The old door squeaked a little, and he winced. "It's okay, I'm awake..." Buffy assured him from her spot on the bed.
What Angel saw laying on the bed didn't barely resemble the woman he loved. Her hair was dirty, tangled, and strewn across her face. Her mascara had run down her face, and left black tear lines. She was curled up into a little ball, making her look extremely small and fragile. Her little hands gripped the velvet blanket, with all the might she had left. Her finger nails were dirty, and her normally beautiful hands and face were scarred and bruised, along with probably the rest of her body. Her thin frame trembled below the sheets, and he could almost hear teeth hitting each other as her chin quivered. Her light, happy eyes, were now wide, dark and clouded, showing only pain.
He stared at her in utter shock, he could barely tell it was her, "Buffy?"
She said nothing, just stared at the picture of her that sat on the bed stand. It was of her, Willow, and Xander sitting at a table in the Bronze, happy... and alive. Angel had drawn it one night, while he watched them from across the room. He had spent more than a month completing it. Angel quickly went to it and put it in a drawer.
She still cried silently, and choked out, "Thank you..." But then she broke down again, and started sobbing so hard that it hurt her to do so. Angel came to her, scared at first of whether she would want him near her. But he sat down on the bed next to her, and she grabbed his shirt and pulled herself up.
She latched herself onto him, wrapping her arms around his chest. He brought her as close to him as he could, and held her. Her body heaved, and eventually she calmed down, sniffling she loosened her grip on him slightly, not wanting to hurt him.
He noticed this, and slowly stroked her hair, "Shhh, it's okay baby. You have to make it through this..." "I can't," she whispered, "The only reason I'm still here, is because I thought I'd have you. If you had died during the fight, I would have too. I would have let--"
"Shhh, don't say things like that," Angel told her. "Sorry... but it's true..." "Oh beloved, don't talk that way. It hurts me so much to see you like this..." Angel held her tight, kissing her shoulder. She just cried out, but then quickly cut it off, covering her mouth with her hand.
"You should take a bath, get cleaned up..." Angel instructed her. She nodded silently, "Okay..." "Come on," Angel said helping her stand up. Buffy almost fell as he lead her to the bathroom, and sat her down on the floor next to the bathtub.
He started the water, as Buffy slowly and painfully began to undress. Angel got it full with water, added some bubbles, and turned around to see Buffy almost completely naked, and gasped. Quickly he calmed himself down, and went to stand her up, then walked her to the tub. She slipped her bra and panties off then slid into the warm bubble bath.
"I'll be outside if you need me..." Angel continued to turn around and walk out. "Angel! Stay... please... I want to spend as much time with you as I can..." Buffy replied, chin quivering again. He paused and turned around, "Okay."
So he stayed, and they talked. About them, about the people they'd lost. They cried a little, but they tried to focus on the good things. Like going to the Bronze all the time, and all the days they'd spent at school together. All the fun things they'd done, all the memories they'd shared.
While this Buffy, helped a little by Angel, bathed and got herself cleaned up. They reminisced about all the stuff they had went through, the sad and the happy. And by the time they were done talking, they had rehashed their entire relationship, and discovered just how much they loved each other.
The three entered the basically untouched Mansion, devastated. Buffy had fallen unconscious from all of her crying, and Spike was shocked at the love she had for Angel. He hadn't known it ran as deep as it did. She was so sad that he could *feel* it. He couldn't really imagine knowing that in 24 hours the love of his life would die, and there was nothing he could do about it.
Angel the whole way had tears running down his face as he looked at the broken girl that Spike carried. He wanted so badly to hold her himself, to whisper in her ear how much he loved her. But she couldn't handle that at the time, so he just looked at her. He sat down on the couch while Spike took Buffy into the bedroom to let her rest for a while. Angel was staring blankly at the empty fireplace a few feet in front of him when Spike returned. Spike swallowed hard and came to sit in the chair near his sire. "Angel..." he stated, with question in his voice. His voice was cold as ice, showing no emotion, "What do you want, Spike?"
He ran a finger through his ravaged bleach blonde hair, "She's not gonna make it without you..."
Angel snapped, "Don't you think I know that?! Don't you think that I wish it could just be over with?! So that I could spare her just a little bit of the pain?! So that I could spare myself?! I *can't*! I'm stuck here for the next 24 hours, knowing I'm going to die! Knowing that in 24 hours I'm going to lose her forever! The person that means the most to me, more than anyone I've ever met, and ever could! I'm just a dead man walking, even more so than before. And now instead of hoping, praying that when I die she'll be able to go on, I am almost certain she won't be able to. Because this time all of her friends are gone, too..."
Spike's heart ached seeing him this way, Angel was supposed to be strong, and here he was breaking down, snapping at the littlest thing. *I guess it wasn't a little thing, but he would have never done that before.*
Now Angel had had too much, he started sobbing, his head held in his hands. He couldn't control it anymore; he let himself fall apart. Spike opened his mouth to speak, but decided better of it. He moved to sit by him and put his hand on Angel's shuddering shoulder.
"I'd tell you it's gonna be okay... but it's not. I'm sorry... I really am, for you and Buffy." Angel never looked him in the eye, but he turned to him and hugged him tight. "Not many people will admit it to you, but you're a good friend," Angel said between sobs. Spike hugged him back, "Yeah, well everyone should admit it to you, 'cause you're the best guy I've ever met." "Thanks," they said in unison. "Just don't ever tell anyone I said that," Spike warned, seriously.
Angel choked back a cry and got out of their embrace. Spike saw that his face actually had a reddish tint to it, "Hey man, I didn't know vampires could do that." Angel looked at him quizzically, "What?" "Well your face is a little red," Spike told him. Angel raised his eyebrows, "I don't know, but I guess it's not everyday one of them starts bawling." They grinned at each other.
"I'm gonna go take a shower, figure I'll get one last one in," he said breaking the lightened mood, then standing up.
"Hey, maybe we'll find a loop-hole, there's always a loop-hole," Spike reminded him. "Yeah, well usually the people looking for them have more than 24 hours," Angel reminded *him*. "You have a point there, but it's worth a shot. I'm gonna go to Giles's old place a get as many books as I can carry," Spike informed him, heading for the door.
"Okay, see yah later," Angel started off in the opposite direction, to the master bathroom. Which, just happened to be off of the master bedroom. Which, just happened to be the bedroom that Spike had put her in.
Angel went into the room as quietly as he possibly could. The old door squeaked a little, and he winced. "It's okay, I'm awake..." Buffy assured him from her spot on the bed.
What Angel saw laying on the bed didn't barely resemble the woman he loved. Her hair was dirty, tangled, and strewn across her face. Her mascara had run down her face, and left black tear lines. She was curled up into a little ball, making her look extremely small and fragile. Her little hands gripped the velvet blanket, with all the might she had left. Her finger nails were dirty, and her normally beautiful hands and face were scarred and bruised, along with probably the rest of her body. Her thin frame trembled below the sheets, and he could almost hear teeth hitting each other as her chin quivered. Her light, happy eyes, were now wide, dark and clouded, showing only pain.
He stared at her in utter shock, he could barely tell it was her, "Buffy?"
She said nothing, just stared at the picture of her that sat on the bed stand. It was of her, Willow, and Xander sitting at a table in the Bronze, happy... and alive. Angel had drawn it one night, while he watched them from across the room. He had spent more than a month completing it. Angel quickly went to it and put it in a drawer.
She still cried silently, and choked out, "Thank you..." But then she broke down again, and started sobbing so hard that it hurt her to do so. Angel came to her, scared at first of whether she would want him near her. But he sat down on the bed next to her, and she grabbed his shirt and pulled herself up.
She latched herself onto him, wrapping her arms around his chest. He brought her as close to him as he could, and held her. Her body heaved, and eventually she calmed down, sniffling she loosened her grip on him slightly, not wanting to hurt him.
He noticed this, and slowly stroked her hair, "Shhh, it's okay baby. You have to make it through this..." "I can't," she whispered, "The only reason I'm still here, is because I thought I'd have you. If you had died during the fight, I would have too. I would have let--"
"Shhh, don't say things like that," Angel told her. "Sorry... but it's true..." "Oh beloved, don't talk that way. It hurts me so much to see you like this..." Angel held her tight, kissing her shoulder. She just cried out, but then quickly cut it off, covering her mouth with her hand.
"You should take a bath, get cleaned up..." Angel instructed her. She nodded silently, "Okay..." "Come on," Angel said helping her stand up. Buffy almost fell as he lead her to the bathroom, and sat her down on the floor next to the bathtub.
He started the water, as Buffy slowly and painfully began to undress. Angel got it full with water, added some bubbles, and turned around to see Buffy almost completely naked, and gasped. Quickly he calmed himself down, and went to stand her up, then walked her to the tub. She slipped her bra and panties off then slid into the warm bubble bath.
"I'll be outside if you need me..." Angel continued to turn around and walk out. "Angel! Stay... please... I want to spend as much time with you as I can..." Buffy replied, chin quivering again. He paused and turned around, "Okay."
So he stayed, and they talked. About them, about the people they'd lost. They cried a little, but they tried to focus on the good things. Like going to the Bronze all the time, and all the days they'd spent at school together. All the fun things they'd done, all the memories they'd shared.
While this Buffy, helped a little by Angel, bathed and got herself cleaned up. They reminisced about all the stuff they had went through, the sad and the happy. And by the time they were done talking, they had rehashed their entire relationship, and discovered just how much they loved each other.