Chapter four:
**You make believe that nothing is wrong until you're crying,
crying on me and you make believe that nothing is wrong until
you're dying,dying on me....**
Limp Bizkit-Rearranged.
******************************************************************************
(two hours later,after Cid's meeting)
*Bing Bong*
"Will Candidate Almasy,Seifer please come to Principal Cid's office immediately."
Seifer's eyes opened as he picked out his name from the music playing in the empty dorm where he'd set up his stereo.He had only recently discovered this room,secreted in the dustiest,unused area of the dorms.
(Finally......don't have to look over my shoulder,wondering when the next person is gonna....when they'll......hurt me again.......)
He rubbed a hand over his face,swiping the moisture from the corner of his eyes,trying not to remember the pain and the emptiness he'd felt that night....so fresh in his memory.....so raw like an unnoticed wound that still bled.....
(Wake up......just don't let it get to you......under your skin....)
He swung his legs over the side of the bare mattress,sitting up and pulling the sleeves of his jumper down over his hands,bracing himself for the day ahead...
(Wonder what Cid wants?)
Suddenly it struck him,he halted so abruptly in the hall,that several students cannoned into his back,shoving him out of the way roughly,but he barely felt their embittered fingers on his body.....
(The SeeD exam......don't tell me......I passed?......Hyne.....)
He sprinted for the elevator,oblivious to anyone and everyone,the sour looks going unreturned,the cat-calls registering zero on his ears......
(This is it..........)
He pressed the button for the third floor with a glimmer of hope,beginning to spark back to life in his chest.
******************************************************************************
Zell,meanwhile was dashing from hall to hall frantically searching for the older blonde.He leant on his knees,the breath wrenched from his burning lungs.
"Where the hell are you.....?" He asked the deserted corridor,a subtle tinge of worry in his voice.
(.....Where are you?....please,just be okay........)
He sighed wearily and began searching once again.
******************************************************************************
(Cid's Office)
Seifer nearly skidded straight through the large,ornate doors to Cid's office and fell over his desk,but he stopped short,reminding himself that "SeeDs" did not conduct themselves with such immaturity.
(Calm down.......breathe in.......breathe out......)
He adjusted himself,checking his clothes and hair to make sure everything was just perfect.With a curt knock on the wooden panel,he entered....
"Seifer." Cid regarded him from behind his massive,mahogany desk,spread out like the expanse of Centra between them.He motioned for Seifer to take a seat,reaching into his drawer to retrieve what Seifer assumed was his profile from the main computer.
"I have some news," he began,looking at Seifer over his wire-rimmed spectacles.
(This is it......I've waited for too long for today.....)
Seifer's heart felt as if it where about to leap from his throat,a warm sensation of pride and anticipation stirring in his guts.
"Due to circumstances beyond my control,I'm dismissing you from SeeD and this Garden." Cid gave Seifer a sympathetic look,gauging his reaction carefully.
(What...........no.....you're joking......right?)
Seifer blinked at him,unable to comprehend the words coming from his headmaster's mouth.The exciting glow from a few seconds ago drained from his body about as fast as the colour from his face.....He sat in silence,choking on his own horror...
"I understand this must come as quite a shock,but I assure you I had nothing to do with this decision." Cid angled his head towards Seifer,concern blossoming in his eyes.
(You can't do this.......my dreams,do they mean nothing?.....)
He kicked the chair back,staggering,tripping over his own heels.Cid stood,reaching out to his distressed student, "Wait,Seifer-" Seifer gazed at him,with blazing eyes,and turned,running for the door without a sound.
******************************************************************************
(Why?...........I tried so hard this time...I gave it everything and now i'm out.......I don't understand.........)
He fled,pushing material obstacles out of his path,in a blind sprint out of Garden.He slammed into the doors,emerging outside,sunlight beating down on the walled area leading towards Balamb....towards home......
Someone was shouting him......pleas to stop,but he couldn't,the anguish of Cid's announcement filled his heart with bitterness,driving him forwards....
(I have to get away.......Run...........)
He clattered down the stairs onto the road for Balamb,caught up in the haze of his own misery......
******************************************************************************
Zell was on the verge of giving up his wild goosechase for Seifer.....maybe Squall was right.....
(Maybe he just wants to be left alone.......but.......everybody needs someone right?)
He smirked at his sentimentality........
There was a chorus of panicked cries as he entered the last unchecked section of Balamb Garden,near the exit.He watched as someone stumbled through the clusters of SeeDs talking and laughing on their way to lunch.
(Seifer?....Seifer,What's wrong?........)
He ran after the cadet,shoving people out of the way,his legs pumping as he tore down the road for Balamb.
******************************************************************************
Zell finally caught up to him about half-way to Balamb town,he'd slowed to a walk now,his shoulders slumped in defeat.Zell bounded up behind him,his breathing shallow,ragged from all the running.
"What's up?" He asked,trying to maintain a light tone.
Seifer carried on walking,ignoring his question completely.Zell frowned and stepped infront of him,putting a determined hand on his hip.
"You're not getting rid of me that easily.Tell me what's going on!" He demanded.Seifer looked up and Zell noticed the bleakness in his eyes,the thin set of his mouth,he moved to speak.....
(Zell.....I-)
".....Zell.." He whispered,falling forward into the martial artist's arms,his body sagging against Zell's as they fell into a crumpled heap on the side of the road.
(Oh my god........)
Zell's cheeks flushed and he almost recoiled at Seifer's warmth against his skin,his arms wrapped tightly,desperately around Zell's waist,his head buried in Zell's chest.
(Is he....crying?)
Never in all the eighteen years Zell had know Seifer had he seen the scarred man shed a single tear....he stammered,forcing the shaking from his bones....
"Seifer.....don't cry....I'm here."
Seifer sniffed,gazing up at him,with a tear-streaked face,his eyes overflowing with pain and terror....he reminded Zell of a child,so defenceless and alone.
(this can't be Seifer......he used to be so confident,so........)
"I....Cid discharged me from SeeD....." A fresh river of tears drowned any more words with sobbing.
Zell swallowed thickly,snatching at some of his forgotten strength.....
(Hyne,he's a mess........I have to take care of him.....or else he might......)
He dismissed the thought with a deep gasp of sea air,collecting his courage.
"Let's just go to my place,okay...get you patched up." Seifer nodded,not realising that his clothes were torn,his forehead blemished by a single cut reaching up into his hairline.Zell supported his weight,sliding a hand around his waist and limping them both slowly home......
(.......My dream..........it's all over..........)
******************************************************************************
I just wanna apologise for all the bad treatment Seifer's getting,(poor love!) I would like to say it's gonna get better.......but you'll just have to wait and see......^_^ luv nakiko
******************************************************************************
**You make believe that nothing is wrong until you're crying,
crying on me and you make believe that nothing is wrong until
you're dying,dying on me....**
Limp Bizkit-Rearranged.
******************************************************************************
(two hours later,after Cid's meeting)
*Bing Bong*
"Will Candidate Almasy,Seifer please come to Principal Cid's office immediately."
Seifer's eyes opened as he picked out his name from the music playing in the empty dorm where he'd set up his stereo.He had only recently discovered this room,secreted in the dustiest,unused area of the dorms.
(Finally......don't have to look over my shoulder,wondering when the next person is gonna....when they'll......hurt me again.......)
He rubbed a hand over his face,swiping the moisture from the corner of his eyes,trying not to remember the pain and the emptiness he'd felt that night....so fresh in his memory.....so raw like an unnoticed wound that still bled.....
(Wake up......just don't let it get to you......under your skin....)
He swung his legs over the side of the bare mattress,sitting up and pulling the sleeves of his jumper down over his hands,bracing himself for the day ahead...
(Wonder what Cid wants?)
Suddenly it struck him,he halted so abruptly in the hall,that several students cannoned into his back,shoving him out of the way roughly,but he barely felt their embittered fingers on his body.....
(The SeeD exam......don't tell me......I passed?......Hyne.....)
He sprinted for the elevator,oblivious to anyone and everyone,the sour looks going unreturned,the cat-calls registering zero on his ears......
(This is it..........)
He pressed the button for the third floor with a glimmer of hope,beginning to spark back to life in his chest.
******************************************************************************
Zell,meanwhile was dashing from hall to hall frantically searching for the older blonde.He leant on his knees,the breath wrenched from his burning lungs.
"Where the hell are you.....?" He asked the deserted corridor,a subtle tinge of worry in his voice.
(.....Where are you?....please,just be okay........)
He sighed wearily and began searching once again.
******************************************************************************
(Cid's Office)
Seifer nearly skidded straight through the large,ornate doors to Cid's office and fell over his desk,but he stopped short,reminding himself that "SeeDs" did not conduct themselves with such immaturity.
(Calm down.......breathe in.......breathe out......)
He adjusted himself,checking his clothes and hair to make sure everything was just perfect.With a curt knock on the wooden panel,he entered....
"Seifer." Cid regarded him from behind his massive,mahogany desk,spread out like the expanse of Centra between them.He motioned for Seifer to take a seat,reaching into his drawer to retrieve what Seifer assumed was his profile from the main computer.
"I have some news," he began,looking at Seifer over his wire-rimmed spectacles.
(This is it......I've waited for too long for today.....)
Seifer's heart felt as if it where about to leap from his throat,a warm sensation of pride and anticipation stirring in his guts.
"Due to circumstances beyond my control,I'm dismissing you from SeeD and this Garden." Cid gave Seifer a sympathetic look,gauging his reaction carefully.
(What...........no.....you're joking......right?)
Seifer blinked at him,unable to comprehend the words coming from his headmaster's mouth.The exciting glow from a few seconds ago drained from his body about as fast as the colour from his face.....He sat in silence,choking on his own horror...
"I understand this must come as quite a shock,but I assure you I had nothing to do with this decision." Cid angled his head towards Seifer,concern blossoming in his eyes.
(You can't do this.......my dreams,do they mean nothing?.....)
He kicked the chair back,staggering,tripping over his own heels.Cid stood,reaching out to his distressed student, "Wait,Seifer-" Seifer gazed at him,with blazing eyes,and turned,running for the door without a sound.
******************************************************************************
(Why?...........I tried so hard this time...I gave it everything and now i'm out.......I don't understand.........)
He fled,pushing material obstacles out of his path,in a blind sprint out of Garden.He slammed into the doors,emerging outside,sunlight beating down on the walled area leading towards Balamb....towards home......
Someone was shouting him......pleas to stop,but he couldn't,the anguish of Cid's announcement filled his heart with bitterness,driving him forwards....
(I have to get away.......Run...........)
He clattered down the stairs onto the road for Balamb,caught up in the haze of his own misery......
******************************************************************************
Zell was on the verge of giving up his wild goosechase for Seifer.....maybe Squall was right.....
(Maybe he just wants to be left alone.......but.......everybody needs someone right?)
He smirked at his sentimentality........
There was a chorus of panicked cries as he entered the last unchecked section of Balamb Garden,near the exit.He watched as someone stumbled through the clusters of SeeDs talking and laughing on their way to lunch.
(Seifer?....Seifer,What's wrong?........)
He ran after the cadet,shoving people out of the way,his legs pumping as he tore down the road for Balamb.
******************************************************************************
Zell finally caught up to him about half-way to Balamb town,he'd slowed to a walk now,his shoulders slumped in defeat.Zell bounded up behind him,his breathing shallow,ragged from all the running.
"What's up?" He asked,trying to maintain a light tone.
Seifer carried on walking,ignoring his question completely.Zell frowned and stepped infront of him,putting a determined hand on his hip.
"You're not getting rid of me that easily.Tell me what's going on!" He demanded.Seifer looked up and Zell noticed the bleakness in his eyes,the thin set of his mouth,he moved to speak.....
(Zell.....I-)
".....Zell.." He whispered,falling forward into the martial artist's arms,his body sagging against Zell's as they fell into a crumpled heap on the side of the road.
(Oh my god........)
Zell's cheeks flushed and he almost recoiled at Seifer's warmth against his skin,his arms wrapped tightly,desperately around Zell's waist,his head buried in Zell's chest.
(Is he....crying?)
Never in all the eighteen years Zell had know Seifer had he seen the scarred man shed a single tear....he stammered,forcing the shaking from his bones....
"Seifer.....don't cry....I'm here."
Seifer sniffed,gazing up at him,with a tear-streaked face,his eyes overflowing with pain and terror....he reminded Zell of a child,so defenceless and alone.
(this can't be Seifer......he used to be so confident,so........)
"I....Cid discharged me from SeeD....." A fresh river of tears drowned any more words with sobbing.
Zell swallowed thickly,snatching at some of his forgotten strength.....
(Hyne,he's a mess........I have to take care of him.....or else he might......)
He dismissed the thought with a deep gasp of sea air,collecting his courage.
"Let's just go to my place,okay...get you patched up." Seifer nodded,not realising that his clothes were torn,his forehead blemished by a single cut reaching up into his hairline.Zell supported his weight,sliding a hand around his waist and limping them both slowly home......
(.......My dream..........it's all over..........)
******************************************************************************
I just wanna apologise for all the bad treatment Seifer's getting,(poor love!) I would like to say it's gonna get better.......but you'll just have to wait and see......^_^ luv nakiko
******************************************************************************