He knew. My world crashed around me. In the middle of it all, I found the time to see the irony in how two words could so destroy a person's life, or worse, their love.
"How?" I managed to ask, quietly, suddenly feeling faint. I sat down on the bed, pulling her down to sit beside me.
Sarah wiped her eyes again, letting them rest closed for a moment, as if perhaps there was some comfort in the dark. For her, there probably was. "He...he saw us," she whispered. "He was coming up to discuss business about the play with the boys, and he saw us."
My head spun, and I tried to make sense of what she was telling me. I opened my mouth to speak, but she placed a finger across my lips. "He...he put a contract out on you," she told me, a tear rolling down her cheek and tumbling, spiralling to the ground. "He'll pay the man who delivers your body to him."
I simply looked at her, the information not registering, not seeming true. Some part of me must have believed her, though, because my eyes went wide and my mouth fell open. Sarah jumped up, away from me, and began to pull her cloak on. "We have to end this. Now," she said, brushing her hair back with her fingers.
I, too, jumped up and over to her side, shaking my head. "No...no, I'll run away. Live in secret somewhere. We can still..."
"No, we can't," she cut me off, shaking her head sorrowfully. "I'm not going to let love, no matter how strong, endanger your life. As of now, we're over." She leaned over and kissed me, very softly, before walking out of the room.
I merely stood there, looking after her vanished form, and cried silently. I wept for what might have been, what would happen now, and for what tomorrow would bring.
A week later, I was still alive, and Sarah's fiancée had apparently allowed her to continue with the production, although I was exempt from rehearsals as he would come to those, and I would deliver my latest work to the boys in secret. They never saw me as I sometimes watched through the window, admiring her grace and beauty, wishing like anything that we could still be together.
One unbearable night, I found myself gravitating towards the club where she danced. I had this need to get my vengeance, I suppose, do to her what she did to me. Without anyone seeing me, I slipped up to her dressing room, knocking and entering upon her invitation.
Once she saw whom it was who had come in, she turned angry. "What are you doing here?" she asked me. "We're over."
I mustered all my courage, and my best lying abilities. "I came to give back your love. As we are, as you say, over, I felt it only necessary and courteous to return to you any emotional baggage I may carry. So here it is, Sarah. Everything we ever shared, all the memories...all the love - as of now, it is no longer."
After making my Shakesperian-esque speech, and willing my legs not to crumble from under me as I walked out of there for the last time, I turned sharply on my heel to leave.
"I didn't ask for my love back, Harm," she called softly to me. "That's yours, forever, to keep."
I swivelled back around to face her, lying harshly, "I don't WANT it anymore, Sarah. As of now, I want nothing to do with your love."
With that, I left. And walked out of her dressing room and, so I thought, out of her life.
No matter what my situation regarding Sarah might have been, I was still needed for opening night, even if it only was to hide in the wings and watch my masterpiece come to life.
And it did, spectacularly, a beautiful array of colour, light and sound. Everyone was brilliant, their voices melding together to create something that the appreciative audience would surely never forget.
Yet I found myself watching only one person - my angel. The awful things I said to her were still fresh in my mind. I watched her float across the stage, singing, dancing, making sure all eyes were on her. And they certainly were. And then, I watched her falter, and I watched her fall.
I stopped myself from crying out, from running to her side. I restrained myself from shouting out my feelings for her over the top of the murmuring crowd. I looked on in horror as one of the minor players picked her up and carried her off, and as the show continued, the talented actors willing the audience to think that Sarah's fall was a part of the plot line.
With no one to see me, I raced through the maze of hallways that was the back of the night-club turned theatre. I turned right and left, blinded to where I was heading by the need to make sure she was alright.
I finally found her, wiping her face with a wet washcloth, ready to go back onstage. She glanced my way, looked into my eyes for a split second, and then turned coldly away from me, shielding her emotions before making her way back onto the stage, to thunderous applause.
What I did next, I still do not believe. Without the risk of consequence registering in my mind, I grabbed a costume coat and leapt up onto the stage as the chorus was performing the second-to-last number.
Sarah looked at me, shocked and angry, as the members of the audience clapped wildly, convinced this was some plot-twist that none of them had seen coming.
I gathered all my strength, knowing that the final song was between her and her lost love - that was me now, I supposed. As I had written it, I knew all the words, and was prepared to sing my love for her if it meant that all I had worked for would be a flop.
Opening my mouth, looking straight into her eyes, I sang:
"Never knew I could feel like this
Like I've never seen the sky before
Want to furnish inside your kiss
Everyday I love you more and more."
Sarah looked hard at me, a dilemma playing behind those beautiful brown eyes. She must have decided that putting on a good show was more important than killing me, because she simply sang her part.
"Listen to my heart, can you hear it sing
Telling me to give you everything
Seasons may change, winter to spring
But I love you, until the end of time."
It was time for the chorus, where we had to make-believe we were lovers. I pulled her close to me and whispered, "Go along with it, Sarah, please. For the play." Out of the corner of my eye, I saw her fiancé looking daggers at me.
She looked at me and nodded, and we launched into the chorus.
"Come what may
Come what may
I will love you until my dying day."
Smiling at her, as the script called for, I picked her up and twirled her around, wishing above all things that she would realize I wasn't just acting. I was pouring out my feelings for her through my song. I began to sing again.
"Suddenly the world seems such a perfect place
Suddenly it moves with such a perfect grace
Suddenly my life doesn't seem such a waste
It all revolves around you."
"And there's no mountain too high, no river too wide
Sing out this song and I'll be there by your side
Storm clouds may gather and stars may go by
But I love you (I love you), until the end (until the end) of time."
As we began to sing the chorus again, she looked straight into my eyes, and in that moment, I knew that she had forgiven me for the lies I told her, forgotten all except our love. Her fiancé must have realized as well, because he got up and stormed out of the theatre.
"Come what may
Come what may
I will love you until my dying day.
Oh come what may
Come what may
I will love you (I will love you)
Suddenly the world seems such a perfect place
Come what may
Come what may
I will love you until my dying day."
She fell back into my arms, and the audience broke into applause. It rang in my ears, the sound reverberating throughout the constructed theatre. The cast held their positions, their heads high, their brows sweaty, as the curtain fell.
Once we were shrouded in privacy, I lifted Sarah back onto her feet. Only then did I realize that her collapse into my arms had not been the one written into the script, but the fact that she had fainted. I quickly laid her down on the floor, calling frantically for someone to bring me some water and a towel.
"Sarah?" I whispered, and slowly her eyes opened. She looked up at me, tears falling, before saying very softly, "God, I'm sorry, Harm."
"You don't have to be sorry, sweetheart," I told her, laughing gently. "You don't have to be sorry about anything. We're together now, it's all gonna be okay."
She struggled to sit up, coughing. "No...I'm sorry for not telling you...about..."
"About what?"
"About the...the cancer. Harm, I'm dying."
I didn't know what to think. I looked wildly around at the faces that surrounded us, seeing the same look of sorrow and pity on their faces. They were all nodding softly, confirming my worst nightmare.
I let her gently out of my arms, before standing up and staring accusingly at all the faces, screaming, "Why wasn't I told? Don't I deserve it?"
"Harm..."
Sarah's weak voice floated up to me. I turned around to face her, my eyes hardened.
"Harm...I'm sorry I didn't tell you. But please...I want to spend my last moments with you...is it too much to ask?" A tear slipped down her cheek. I sat back down with her, gathering her up in my arms.
"No, Sarah...your last moment will be in about sixty years," I said to her, kissing her forehead. "But I promise you, I will be there for that."
She looked up at me, and no matter what my heart and my head wanted to believe, I knew that she was slipping away from me, and that in a few moments, she would be gone forever.
"Harm...I want you to tell our story... That way, we'll live on forever," she said weakly, before falling back into my embrace. "I... I love you."
"Sarah, no...don't leave me," I begged her, tears rolling down my face and dripping onto my arms. I kissed her once more, and I knew she was gone.
"I love you too. More than anything. More that even you'd know," I whispered to her, before laying her down on the ground, and wishing her peace.
After that, I moped in my hotel room. I stared at the wall for days on end, sometimes seeing her there, other times just seeing what it was - a blank wall. Finally, though, I wrote my love story. It was ours. It was the one you are reading now.
FIN
A/N: Yes, I realize that I have a tendency to kill Mac. It's not that I don't like her; she's my fave character. It's just that it seems more tragic when she dies. Sorry to all the Mac fans.
A/N 2: This part may have been a bit off plot. Forgive me, as it's been a while since I saw Moulin Rouge, so I'm trying to remember it as accurately as I can.
"How?" I managed to ask, quietly, suddenly feeling faint. I sat down on the bed, pulling her down to sit beside me.
Sarah wiped her eyes again, letting them rest closed for a moment, as if perhaps there was some comfort in the dark. For her, there probably was. "He...he saw us," she whispered. "He was coming up to discuss business about the play with the boys, and he saw us."
My head spun, and I tried to make sense of what she was telling me. I opened my mouth to speak, but she placed a finger across my lips. "He...he put a contract out on you," she told me, a tear rolling down her cheek and tumbling, spiralling to the ground. "He'll pay the man who delivers your body to him."
I simply looked at her, the information not registering, not seeming true. Some part of me must have believed her, though, because my eyes went wide and my mouth fell open. Sarah jumped up, away from me, and began to pull her cloak on. "We have to end this. Now," she said, brushing her hair back with her fingers.
I, too, jumped up and over to her side, shaking my head. "No...no, I'll run away. Live in secret somewhere. We can still..."
"No, we can't," she cut me off, shaking her head sorrowfully. "I'm not going to let love, no matter how strong, endanger your life. As of now, we're over." She leaned over and kissed me, very softly, before walking out of the room.
I merely stood there, looking after her vanished form, and cried silently. I wept for what might have been, what would happen now, and for what tomorrow would bring.
A week later, I was still alive, and Sarah's fiancée had apparently allowed her to continue with the production, although I was exempt from rehearsals as he would come to those, and I would deliver my latest work to the boys in secret. They never saw me as I sometimes watched through the window, admiring her grace and beauty, wishing like anything that we could still be together.
One unbearable night, I found myself gravitating towards the club where she danced. I had this need to get my vengeance, I suppose, do to her what she did to me. Without anyone seeing me, I slipped up to her dressing room, knocking and entering upon her invitation.
Once she saw whom it was who had come in, she turned angry. "What are you doing here?" she asked me. "We're over."
I mustered all my courage, and my best lying abilities. "I came to give back your love. As we are, as you say, over, I felt it only necessary and courteous to return to you any emotional baggage I may carry. So here it is, Sarah. Everything we ever shared, all the memories...all the love - as of now, it is no longer."
After making my Shakesperian-esque speech, and willing my legs not to crumble from under me as I walked out of there for the last time, I turned sharply on my heel to leave.
"I didn't ask for my love back, Harm," she called softly to me. "That's yours, forever, to keep."
I swivelled back around to face her, lying harshly, "I don't WANT it anymore, Sarah. As of now, I want nothing to do with your love."
With that, I left. And walked out of her dressing room and, so I thought, out of her life.
No matter what my situation regarding Sarah might have been, I was still needed for opening night, even if it only was to hide in the wings and watch my masterpiece come to life.
And it did, spectacularly, a beautiful array of colour, light and sound. Everyone was brilliant, their voices melding together to create something that the appreciative audience would surely never forget.
Yet I found myself watching only one person - my angel. The awful things I said to her were still fresh in my mind. I watched her float across the stage, singing, dancing, making sure all eyes were on her. And they certainly were. And then, I watched her falter, and I watched her fall.
I stopped myself from crying out, from running to her side. I restrained myself from shouting out my feelings for her over the top of the murmuring crowd. I looked on in horror as one of the minor players picked her up and carried her off, and as the show continued, the talented actors willing the audience to think that Sarah's fall was a part of the plot line.
With no one to see me, I raced through the maze of hallways that was the back of the night-club turned theatre. I turned right and left, blinded to where I was heading by the need to make sure she was alright.
I finally found her, wiping her face with a wet washcloth, ready to go back onstage. She glanced my way, looked into my eyes for a split second, and then turned coldly away from me, shielding her emotions before making her way back onto the stage, to thunderous applause.
What I did next, I still do not believe. Without the risk of consequence registering in my mind, I grabbed a costume coat and leapt up onto the stage as the chorus was performing the second-to-last number.
Sarah looked at me, shocked and angry, as the members of the audience clapped wildly, convinced this was some plot-twist that none of them had seen coming.
I gathered all my strength, knowing that the final song was between her and her lost love - that was me now, I supposed. As I had written it, I knew all the words, and was prepared to sing my love for her if it meant that all I had worked for would be a flop.
Opening my mouth, looking straight into her eyes, I sang:
"Never knew I could feel like this
Like I've never seen the sky before
Want to furnish inside your kiss
Everyday I love you more and more."
Sarah looked hard at me, a dilemma playing behind those beautiful brown eyes. She must have decided that putting on a good show was more important than killing me, because she simply sang her part.
"Listen to my heart, can you hear it sing
Telling me to give you everything
Seasons may change, winter to spring
But I love you, until the end of time."
It was time for the chorus, where we had to make-believe we were lovers. I pulled her close to me and whispered, "Go along with it, Sarah, please. For the play." Out of the corner of my eye, I saw her fiancé looking daggers at me.
She looked at me and nodded, and we launched into the chorus.
"Come what may
Come what may
I will love you until my dying day."
Smiling at her, as the script called for, I picked her up and twirled her around, wishing above all things that she would realize I wasn't just acting. I was pouring out my feelings for her through my song. I began to sing again.
"Suddenly the world seems such a perfect place
Suddenly it moves with such a perfect grace
Suddenly my life doesn't seem such a waste
It all revolves around you."
"And there's no mountain too high, no river too wide
Sing out this song and I'll be there by your side
Storm clouds may gather and stars may go by
But I love you (I love you), until the end (until the end) of time."
As we began to sing the chorus again, she looked straight into my eyes, and in that moment, I knew that she had forgiven me for the lies I told her, forgotten all except our love. Her fiancé must have realized as well, because he got up and stormed out of the theatre.
"Come what may
Come what may
I will love you until my dying day.
Oh come what may
Come what may
I will love you (I will love you)
Suddenly the world seems such a perfect place
Come what may
Come what may
I will love you until my dying day."
She fell back into my arms, and the audience broke into applause. It rang in my ears, the sound reverberating throughout the constructed theatre. The cast held their positions, their heads high, their brows sweaty, as the curtain fell.
Once we were shrouded in privacy, I lifted Sarah back onto her feet. Only then did I realize that her collapse into my arms had not been the one written into the script, but the fact that she had fainted. I quickly laid her down on the floor, calling frantically for someone to bring me some water and a towel.
"Sarah?" I whispered, and slowly her eyes opened. She looked up at me, tears falling, before saying very softly, "God, I'm sorry, Harm."
"You don't have to be sorry, sweetheart," I told her, laughing gently. "You don't have to be sorry about anything. We're together now, it's all gonna be okay."
She struggled to sit up, coughing. "No...I'm sorry for not telling you...about..."
"About what?"
"About the...the cancer. Harm, I'm dying."
I didn't know what to think. I looked wildly around at the faces that surrounded us, seeing the same look of sorrow and pity on their faces. They were all nodding softly, confirming my worst nightmare.
I let her gently out of my arms, before standing up and staring accusingly at all the faces, screaming, "Why wasn't I told? Don't I deserve it?"
"Harm..."
Sarah's weak voice floated up to me. I turned around to face her, my eyes hardened.
"Harm...I'm sorry I didn't tell you. But please...I want to spend my last moments with you...is it too much to ask?" A tear slipped down her cheek. I sat back down with her, gathering her up in my arms.
"No, Sarah...your last moment will be in about sixty years," I said to her, kissing her forehead. "But I promise you, I will be there for that."
She looked up at me, and no matter what my heart and my head wanted to believe, I knew that she was slipping away from me, and that in a few moments, she would be gone forever.
"Harm...I want you to tell our story... That way, we'll live on forever," she said weakly, before falling back into my embrace. "I... I love you."
"Sarah, no...don't leave me," I begged her, tears rolling down my face and dripping onto my arms. I kissed her once more, and I knew she was gone.
"I love you too. More than anything. More that even you'd know," I whispered to her, before laying her down on the ground, and wishing her peace.
After that, I moped in my hotel room. I stared at the wall for days on end, sometimes seeing her there, other times just seeing what it was - a blank wall. Finally, though, I wrote my love story. It was ours. It was the one you are reading now.
FIN
A/N: Yes, I realize that I have a tendency to kill Mac. It's not that I don't like her; she's my fave character. It's just that it seems more tragic when she dies. Sorry to all the Mac fans.
A/N 2: This part may have been a bit off plot. Forgive me, as it's been a while since I saw Moulin Rouge, so I'm trying to remember it as accurately as I can.