Carter whirled around on the little rolling stool. "Dr. Lewis, is that you?"
"Yep! And it's Susan, John. You aren't a little med student anymore."
"Alright, Susan. How are you? What brings you to Chicago?"
"Just visiting. I'm fine, and yourself?"
"Fine. Is this Suzie? She's so big! What is she, 6 now?" He remembered the day Suzie was born, smiling.
"Yeah, her birthday was yesterday."
"Happy Birthday."
"Thank you." Suzie was getting used to people she didn't know saying happy birthday. It seemed to be happening a lot.
"So, Susan, what's been going on with you?"
"Well, I'm working in Phoenix, which is really great, but I miss Chicago. I live right near Suzie, and I stay over with her sometimes, we have little sleepovers sometimes...it's great! I love the hospital I work at, and I love being close to my family. Besides, Phoenix has better weather than Chicago!"
"Geez, take a breath Susan!" he joked. "No, really, I'm glad you're happy. We miss you around here." What he meant was, HE had missed her.
"Thanks. What's new with you?"
Carter groaned. "You really think you want to know?"
"that bad?"
He nodded, putting down the charts he had been catching up on in the empty exam room. she sat on the other rolling stool and wheeled it over near his, bumping into his stool, causing him to spin quickly towards the bed. "Sorry Carter!" she laughed as she reached for his hand, pulling him back over to her. "You can tell me SOMETHING for sure, Carter. It's been 4 years..nothing you want to talk about?"
Sighing, Carter prepared himself to tell the story. "I was..attacked by a patient. He stabbed me and my med student in the back. She....she didn't survive." He put a hand up to his forehead, feeling the tiny scar from the she had kicked him during her "tae-bo lesson". It was a small cut, and it shouldn't have scarred, but it did, and so he had a constant reminder of Lucy. Thinking of the other events of that day...his eyes began to tear, but he blinked them away.
"John, I'm so sorry...I didn't mean to make you..."
"No, it's OK. You didn't know... and it was over a year ago, it's ok."
Susan knew the time didn't make a difference, she could tell by his pained expression. If he had had a mirror, he could have seen how unconvincing his lie had been.
Carter wasn't going to tell Susan about his drug problems. He had liked her...a lot...and he still didn't want her to think badly of him. Especially after her problems with Chloe's addiction, he didn't want her to know he was just as...imperfect...as anyone else.
"Dammit! I promised Mark I'd meet him for lunch and I planned to take Suzie up to daycare." Susan glanced at her watch, hoping the exam room clock was slightly fast so she had time to run upstairs. It wasn't. "Can you...I really wouldn't ask, but can you tell Mark I'll be a little late?"
"Hey, you go meet him, I'll watch Suzie for you."
"No, Carter, it's ok. You have work, patients..."
"I'm not on for 3 hours. I just came to do some charts. It's no problem, don't worry."
"Thanks John! I'll page you when I'm ready to pick her up!" She flashed her beaming smile at him and said goodbye to Suzie, telling her to be good.
"Have fun with Dr. Greene!" He smiled at her as she left the room to meet Mark. He wasn't really happy enough for his fake smile. Not only had she reminded him of Lucy, but she had reminded him of his feelings for her and THEIR almost kiss.
"Damn, do I try to kiss EVERY woman I work with?" he asked himself silently, shaking his head.